The sloth: An odd tree-dwelling animal, the most commonly referred to species of which has three toes and a permanent smile on its face.

The spammer: An internet-based douchebag who sends unsolicited email in bulk.

How are these two related? In You Are Sloth by Steve Lowe, a criminal simply known as the Spammer has begun sending out emails that turn people into their power animal. When you (yes, you) are turned into a sloth, you must join with your neighbors Cross the Asshole and Randy the Retard (named so by Cross the Asshole), you must track down the Spammer, discover his dastardly plot, and reap some three-toed vengeance.

So, the first thing you'll notice is how I referred to “you” as the main character. That's because this book is written in a second-person perspective (for those not familiar with literary terms, first person is “I,” second person is “you,” and third person is “he/she/it,” to put it quickly). The second-person perspective is usually used in things like those old “Choose Your Own Adventure” books. This is not one of those. It's simply an experimental way of telling the story, and it works. I have to give Lowe a lot of credit for risking this kind of perspective. It's odd at first, but you get used to it very quickly.

The second thing is that this book is funny. It is really funny. The humor is gross, inappropriate, and yet given the characters this book deals with, it couldn't be any other way. These are very low-brow characters. If you don't like lots of feces or mature themes in your story, especially death by bukkake, this might not be the best book for you. For me, it works perfectly in the context of this story.

The story flows, the characters develop, and it's a fun journey along the way as you discover how to be a sloth. If anything, this book actually reminds me a little of Lowe's earlier book Muscle Memory. In both books, characters find themselves in different bodies and have to come to terms with themselves, what they've done, and how they've lived their lives. This similarity isn't necessarily a bad thing. I liked “Muscle Memory,” and while it's a similar theme, the story itself is completely different.

I can't really find a fault with this book. It's hysterically funny, thoughtful, experimental, and really just an outright fun book to read. You really can't go wrong here. Steve Lowe has written what is arguably one of the best books I've read all year, and I'm not exaggerating when I say that.

You Are Sloth by Steve Lowe earns 5 three-toes out of 5. ( )

An enjoyable little nonsense book. ( )

If you ever wondered just how wrong things could go when you click a link in a spam email - this terrifically insane yet somehow logically constructed tale of coincidences that are anything but will take you to that happy place ! ( )

http://beauty-in-ruins.blogspot.ca/2013/08/poking-bizarro-sloth-with-steve-lowe.... ( )

★★★★You Are Sloth by Steve Lowe

This was a beta read I was given in exchange for my honest opinion.

What happens when you can't come up with the rent money? It begins a game of who do I have to screw to get by this month? And if that don't work, go back to being your lazy self. Go do your job, and review the book you are supposed to be going over. Maybe all this self-help non-sense spewing out of some want to be guru's mouth, will help you.

So we all gotten those crazy emails, telling us we've won all this money, or so in so is trying to hook up with you, or work at home and get rich, and we know not to open them. Most likely they will contain viruses or be phishing emails, trying to steal your info. Nothing good can come of it. You know better.

Now when you think what the hell and open it anyways, deal with it. You are sloth, comes up on screen. What does that mean? Be prepared to find out, because this virus is so bad, it changes you into a sloth, just from reading the screen.

But this isn't your only problem. You now have to rely on you idiot neighbor who knows nothing, and your egomaniac neighbor, who thinks he's Gods gift to the world, to save your sorry sloth ass. Stumbling around, Edward Scissor-Handing everything, with your three toes and yellow nails.

What do you learn as a sloth?
*you are a cheaper drunk
*chicks dig animals
*you're a real life furry
*use that to get laid
*no one is your esé
*you can still get on Homeland Securities watch list
*you are a super hero, leading the Sloth Squad in a crusade against gay men who like fuzzy animals
*when someone says every hole, it might really mean every single hole

So sit back and enjoy the slow ride. It's going to be a long one, which will only get weirder.

This book had me laughing throughout with its rude, crude, and lewd behavior. Just when you think it can't get any better, he goes off and says something else to leave me shaking my head.

Thanks to the author for sharing all the madness with me.

So, "Stop Having the Lazy and Buy You Are Sloth! Day" on July 18. ( )