I Think I Am In Friend-Love With You

This book is a confession of friend-love from a gray, one-eyed being to a faceless white being. It's a very quick read, more the kind of thing you might give as a gift to someone than something you'd read for its story or characters.

I have mixed feelings about this. On the one hand, yes, it's great to see something that recognizes friendship as a relationship that can be as deep and affecting as a romantic relationship. On the other hand, it gets kind of weird at a few points and ends on a note that doesn't entirely feel healthy. Although I said this feels like the kind of thing you might give someone as a gift, the recipient might feel more than a little creeped out after reading it.

The gray being takes great pains to explain that show more their love is friendship-love, and inadvertently comes across as weird in an effort to not make it weird. A few examples:

"I don't want to date you or even make out with you because that would be weird."

"And when we do hang out, I don't want to swap saliva, I just want to swap favorite books."

I think it's the specificity that makes it weird. Like, I wasn't thinking about any of those things until you brought them up, and now they're stuck in my brain as options and weirding me out.

Near the end, the gray being assures the white being (this entire text is presented as a letter the gray being wrote and delivered to the white being's house) that it wouldn't be sad if the white being were in a romantic relationship - it would, in fact, be happy for it. But right after that, the grey being witnesses the white being swap books with another being and starts crying, because this is apparently evidence that the white being sees someone else as a closer friend than the gray being.

...Your friends will have other friends. Even your best, closest friend. This doesn't necessarily mean that they no longer view you as a close friend. Not being obsessively focused on one person is a good thing, whether the relationship is friendship or romantic. But I'm not sure the book's author recognizes that.

Anyway, I appreciate what the book was trying to do, but it missed the mark. The more I think about it, the more uncomfortable I get. It's a shame, because, with several pages torn out, this might have been decent, in a "Hallmark card in book form" kind of way.

(Original review posted on A Library Girl's Familiar Diversions.) show less

I think I am in friend-love with you. I think you are super awesome and I want to be super awesome with you. This is a love letter to a friend: a close friend, someone who is more than a friend and is like family. I have those people in my life and I cherish them.

BUT this book kind of veered into the deep end of crazy a bit which weirded me out. Love, whether romantic or platonic, should not be desperate stalkerish.

Still I appreciate the sentiment, and understand the desire to be better friends with somebody. Just, maybe let it happen naturally instead of writing a creepy letter you slide under the other person's door, mmkay?

queer platonic soulmates for the win! no, seriously. there's a certain level of intimacy i have or want with some friends that's deeper than friendship but not like a romantic partner. this book explains it close to perfectly

queer platonic soulmates for the win! no, seriously. there's a certain level of intimacy i have or want with some friends that's deeper than friendship but not like a romantic partner. this book explains it close to perfectly

So, this is the sweetest book I've read in weeks. Possibly, ever, actually. I've felt like this about a lot of people in my life where the affection and appreciation I have for someone transcends the implications of mere "friendship" and into something else that is also not romantic or involving physical intimacy.

Now I have a book I can give to these people. I think I am in friend love with you.

asdfgh, it's very short and very very cute!!
So, it's about friend-love. Which is very similar to what I have called a friend crush in the past, and what other aromantic people call a squish.

It's not exactly the same for me. I generally wouldn't think it's weird to hold my friend's hand or to cuddle them. Last time I had a friend crush, I didn't even feel the need to spend a lot of time with that wonderful person, just to see them once in a while, at all (because yes, not seeing them would have broken my friend heart into a million pieces).

But, you know what? I think this is the perfect description of what those things can feel like. There are so many types of friendship, and I guess most people have more than one kind of friends, so show more friend love can come with different desires around it. (Like, some people would also want sex with their friendship. Some wouldn't want the tumblr reblogging thing. Idk.)

Still, I could really relate, and I think this is going to be my go-to explanation of friend crushes. I just hope it feels as powerful to people who don't understand them? Meh, probably not, but. show less

Cute. Short book on platonic love. I felt like the ending could have been a bit better.