This Lullaby

This is only the second time I was not feeling a Dessen book, and man this book had me rage screaming while hiking with my friend this weekend. At least I made her laugh when I was recounting some of the crap this book is full of. We have slut shaming, a boy that ignores what the heroine asks, ie (tries to force feed her cake at one point), underage drinking to the point I checked to make sure none of these fools was over the age of 21), no understanding of relationships, emotions, and oh can I say again, the slut-shaming?

What really shocks me is that this book came out after "Dreamland" which was so good and really got into teen physical abuse. I don't know what this book was trying to showcase. That assholes are people too? I don't show more know.

"This Lullaby" follows Remy. Remy is in the midst of dumping her boyfriend and trying to organize her mother's fifth wedding. The way that Dessen rights Remy you think she was a hard talking 20 something year old. But nope, she's 18 in this book. She and her friends have just graduated high school and Remy starts at Stanford in August. So she wants to get her mother married and be off with no worries about leaving anyone behind. Of course that all changes when she meets no boundaries at all Dexter. Dexter decides after seeing Remy at a car dealership that she's a challenge and he is going to wear her down so she will date him.

There is nothing at all charming about Dexter. For most of this book I found him insufferable. And Remy is just a straight up asshole towards him, her mother, her brother, her friends, and even the guys she dates. But I am supposed to someone get that Dexter found Remy and let her see that it's okay to be in love. Man I wish this book had been different.

Dexter is a musician in his 20s and he and his friends travel around doing odd jobs while trying to make it. I didn't see the charm in them and their whole deal. Heck, I was waiting for the moment I was supposed to care about any of them. All of the secondary characters in this one were sketched so thin it was unreal. As much as Remy talks about her friends, they felt like they were barely in this book.

Remy has rules about getting involved with a guy. Keep things distant, don't fall in love cause love isn't real, and just dump with no regrets. I definitely see why she was that way, but I think that Dessen tried to handwave away too many things that are revealed about Remy. And I hate that Remy and her friends considered her a slut for sleeping with so many guys. And oh cause she was hot, it's kind of understood that is just the way things happen? I don't know. The whole book was so odd and off-putting. I really just had it when Remy and her friends try to convince her she's in love with Dexter and that's just cause she never sleeps with him.

Banging head.

I was really happy to see the end of this book. show less

Thoroughly enjoyable.

With Remy’s background, she has every reason to be cynical about love, to want no part of it, but the moment she meets Dexter, this clumsy, goofy musician throws everything off balance, he has her feeling things she most definitely doesn’t want to feel.

I really appreciated that Remy’s family is so much a part of the narrative, the way the father she never met continues to affect her, the damage her mother’s multiple marriages have done, the way she looks after her mom while simultaneously resenting it, and her brother, who was supposed to be as down on love as Remy in a relationship with Jennifer Anne (such a great character). Giving so many layers to Remy’s home-life not only gives the reader a greater show more understanding of who she is, it adds a sense of realism that I don’t tend to feel in YA books when the focus is pretty much just on friends and love interests. This feels more like a full life being explored.

Typically in a romance, it’s the guy who’s reluctant to be all in and the girl who’s much more willing to put her heart on the line, I loved that this flipped that. I loved how guarded Remy is and how Dexter’s heart is right there on his sleeve, and how that dynamic is demonstrated time again throughout the story in vastly different ways, for instance, cute with the flatware and emotionally gutting at the mini-mart. Their relationship is sweet and hurtful and had me hoping to the very end. show less

"Risks. That's living, Remy. Being too scared to try it - that's just a waste. "

Wow, this one was shockingly good. I say that because...with the synopsis, I hadn't expected to love it. I just figured it'd be light and fluffy and meh.

But, this one really got me. I know Remy, I know her well. She is so me as a teenager it was frightening. It's tough to believe in love, especially when you've been burned and you watch others try and fail.

It's hard to have that faith.

It's a great story, one that's got grit and truth and is very real. [a:Sarah Dessen|2987|Sarah Dessen|https://d.gr-assets.com/authors/1372181953p2/2987.jpg] definitely delivers another great one.

I am not usually one for the mushy romances, but Sarah Dessen's books have always been different; they don't ever really fall into that category. I have to say, "This Lullaby" is my all-time favorite of her books.

Maybe it's the general plot idea; that Remy is so disillusioned by love. I've been there myself, and whenever I start to wonder if it's all make-believe, this book reaffirms that yes, the power of love does exist. Remy is not necessarily like me, but Dessen makes it so easy to understand her problems that you empathize with her quickly. And she's certainly strong and capable...sometimes too much so, as she learns.

As always, Dessen has a quirky, realistic, and lovable cast of supporting characters to help the heroine along her show more way. It's one of the things I love in her books.

And then there's Dexter, the thing that clinched the book for me. I can say without shame that I undoubtedly fell in love with this goofy, eccentric, lovable musician boy. Nearly every scene he's in, he steals. Every quirky, hilarious, and innocently meaningful line makes you laugh or think or cry. I have too many favorites to count. I would love to meet a real-life Dexter someday, no lie.

So basically, if you want to have fun following a mildly predictable but amazing story of not-so-ordinary teen romance, read this. But don't expect the characters to ever leave. show less

Eighteen-year-old Remy has a hard time believing in a love that can last. This isn’t a surprise when you see the examples she has had throughout her life. When the book begins Remy is helping her mother plan her fifth wedding. She was never able to meet her father and has to create an image of who he was via her mother and a song he wrote specifically for Remy. This song even talks about how he will let her down. As a result she has come to expect that people, especially men, will not be sticking around for very long and she has built up a wall to protect herself from getting in too deep. That wall remains impenetrable until Dexter shows up and starts chipping away to her heart.

I’m beginning to realize that I love almost every show more Dessen novel for very different reasons. It seems to me that each novel brings something so different and complex to the table that I’m just not sure that I can solidify one as my favorite. I do love just how completely opposite Dexter and Remy seem at the surface. Upon closer examination you realize that they share so many of the same fears and similar experiences. It makes me think more about the people I interact with who may initially appear to be so very different from me. Perhaps at the core we have more in common than I could have ever thought.

As always I love Dessen’s writing style. In this particular novel I really loved the voice of Remy. She is truly very different from many of Dessen’s other narrators in that she doesn’t hold anything back in her dialogue or her narration. As a reader I really appreciate that insight because it feels as if Remy is one of your closest friends. You learn so much about her that eventually you can see through what she is saying to what she really means and feels.

I love the group of girl friends in this book! It is just so true to life. I feel like in any group you will find that some people just click and there are at least two who don’t really like each other but will still be there for each other when needed. Reading about these girls throwing the drink at Lissa’s ex and then throwing their drinks at Don’s car made me want to practice and perfect my aim. I just love the solidarity found there.

I think my only issue with characters had to do with the band. I knew there were three additional guys in the group, but I really didn’t know who was who and I kind of wish they would have been a little bit more distinguishable from one another. Although, I tend to have a hard time keeping characters straight so maybe a better reader wouldn’t have this complaint.

Initially I thought that Dexter would be too much for me as he is messy, doesn’t really have a plan and seems to be so very flighty. Somehow despite all of those irritating qualities he becomes appealing and lovable. He is like an adorable puppy that messes up your entire house and then looks up at you with those big eyes and you just can’t help but love him anyway. I understand why Remy would have a hard time letting this one go.

I really love that there is just something so natural about Remy and Dexter’s relationship. They never really have to try too hard when they decide to be together. Nothing about their relationship is toxic. The only problem is found within themselves and their baggage and their unwillingness to really let go and give into what it is that they have. (I keep saying they because while Remy was the one to struggle with the relationship, Dexter admits when they are having issues that given time he could be just as likely to struggle the way that Remy struggles.) I just love seeing these kids overcome their issues and grow together.

This is yet another fantastic book by Sarah Dessen. It’s incredibly well written with complex, interesting characters that keep you interested. I would highly recommend you read it. Seriously, stop reading this and go get that. NOW! show less

This YA book by Dessen has at its center, Remy, just graduated from high school, who doesn't believe in romantic love. Her own life experience tells her that it doesn't exist. Her mother is about to embark on marriage number five. Her musician father left before she was ever born, wrote her a now famous song when she was born (complete with lyrics exhorting her to not count on him), but never laid eyes on her. She's always skinnied out of any relationship that seemed like it might be getting too deep and the summer before she leaves for college should shape up to be just another in the same superficial dating scene. Then she meets Dexter, who crawls over all her barriers and makes her break all her rules. First, he's a musician and show more she's always had a no musicians rule because of her father. Next, she doesn't dump him for one of the myriad small reasons that she's tired of boys before. And finally, he's gotten under her skin in a way that no other boy ever has and he is persistent, not allowing her to pull back and retreat when she gets scared. So although Remy knows how a relationship goes, even to being able to predict how long it will last from first infatuation to last goodbye, nothing about Dexter is by the book for her.

Dessen has drawn very believable young adult characters, tapping into their belief that they know how the world will always work and in Remy's case, into the sad cynicism she uses as a shield so she won't ever be hurt. Although the adult characters are very secondary, Dessen skillfully uses them to help Remy grow and mature and see the world in a new way. There was only one instance in Remy's interactions with her mother that seemed a bit preachy and obvious, otherwise they were understated and subtle. While this was very obviously a teen romance, it was more than that. It was about the existence of love and the ways in which we close ourselves off from or conversely, open ourselves up to, that experience. It's not about first love or lasting love but just the willingness to accept love, with all its attendant hurts and healings, whether it lasts forever or just a short time. Readers of young adult literature will certainly appreciate this one as it is a nice representation of the genre. Teens will enjoy it too, whether they think love is ephemeral or that they have already met the love of their lives. show less

Dexter is my favourite Dessen guy ever, probably because he is the funniest and for once he isn't extremely damaged.

21/11/2013 **EDIT**

Okay so I reread the book not that long ago and I think it's only fair that I give the book a full review while it's still fresh in my mind.

Remy is easily my favourite Dessen girl. Hard as nails, independent, a nice balance of bitchy and practicle...well, damn, she's everything I aspire to be.

Dexter: Perfection wrapped up in imperfections, 'nuff said.

The other characters? Nicely deveolped with real growth and purpose in the story. You could see the individual problems of her friends and brother, and they weren't just brushed over. I especially like her mothers marriage storyline.

While of course the show more story had to go through that awkward "ahhhhh relationship breakdown oh noes" stage, Dessen managed to pull it off with a considerable amount of finesse. Obviously it was one of the only real comlications that she could add to the story so I'm not annoyed or rolling my eyes at all.

With a huge amount of humour and heartfelt moments, this is certainly one of Dessen's better efforts. show less