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Escape From B-Movie Hell

by M. T. McGuire

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1331,528,648 (3.3)1
If you asked Andi Turbot whether she had anything in common with Flash Gordon she'd say no, emphatically. Saving the world is for dynamic, go-ahead, leaders of men and while it would be nice to see a woman getting involved for a change, she believes she could be the least well-equipped being in her galaxy for the job. Then her best friend, Eric, reveals that he is an extraterrestrial. He's not just any ET either. He's Gamalian: seven-foot, lobster-shaped and covered in Marmite-scented goo. Just when Andi's getting used to that he tells her about the Apocalypse and really ruins her day. The human race will perish unless Eric's Gamalian superiors step in. Abducted and trapped on an alien ship, Andi must convince the Gamalians her world is worth saving. Or escape from their clutches and save it herself.… (more)
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I would caveat this review by stating upfront that I'm not the principal audience for this type of fiction, as I don't tend to read humorous fiction and like it a bit more on the dry and wordplay side - Douglas Adams' Hitchhiker's Guide series for example. However, I do read science fiction.

Protagonist Andi Turbot becomes embroiled in intergalactic politics when Eric, her friend at college, reveals he is actually a tall lobster-like creature with 7 eyes on stalks who needs to be smeared with marmite smelling goo in order to breathe. His human appearance has been a projection all along, but he has confided in her because the Earth is about to be devastated by meteor collision in order to allow its colonisation by alien life, on the assumption that humans aren't sentient (despite having a civilisation of sorts). Andi has to help Eric and his husbands (his species are all male) to prove that she and her fellow humans are sentient AND prevent the meteor collision, which is made more difficult by its being steered towards Earth deliberately and protected by a forcefield. Meanwhile, the identity of the real villain of the piece is not necessarily the obvious one.

I liked Eric and his relationship with Andi, though we don't see a lot of Andi's alternative side as a standup comedian. Eric and his fellows are quite nicely alien with their physiological differences and telepathy, though there are one or two things that are brought into the story - such as they seemingly can go and talk to their deity in person? - which are not really developed into a payoff. Also sometimes I found the pacing a bit slow. I did also wonder about the aliens being a bit militaristic when it seems they have an inhibition against actually killing anyone (at least, anyone they deem to be sentient). However, it was a lighthearted and amusing romp with some tension around the fate of the Earth, so I would award it a well-deserved 3 stars. ( )
  kitsune_reader | Nov 23, 2023 |
If Arthur Dent was a modern lesbian undergrad romping through the golden age of science fiction – cheesily bad special effects and all.

Andi's just your average, ordinary undergrad. Until one day she accidentally thinks someone else's thought. And then her best friend Eric reveals himself to be not exactly the Norwegian exchange student she thought he was. Oh, and the world's about to end.

My ADHD brain had a tough time with some of the overly long paragraphs and it possibly could have done with another pass by the editor. But on the whole, it's well structured and has clearly had at least one round of editing. ( )
  clacksee | Dec 12, 2022 |
This is, unfortunately, a kind of humor I really don't enjoy. The story is actually pretty interesting, and it's well-written, but it's clearly expecting me to be rolling in the aisles about the lobster aliens, telepathy, last-minute save of Earth, plots and counterplots... I found the legal discussion somewhat amusing, but it got a mild smile from me rather than tears of laughter. It just didn't work for me. If you love Red Dwarf or think Marvin is the best character in Hitchhiker's Guide, please grab this book - you'll probably love it. I don't see the humor in either of those, either. ( )
  jjmcgaffey | Sep 23, 2020 |
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If you asked Andi Turbot whether she had anything in common with Flash Gordon she'd say no, emphatically. Saving the world is for dynamic, go-ahead, leaders of men and while it would be nice to see a woman getting involved for a change, she believes she could be the least well-equipped being in her galaxy for the job. Then her best friend, Eric, reveals that he is an extraterrestrial. He's not just any ET either. He's Gamalian: seven-foot, lobster-shaped and covered in Marmite-scented goo. Just when Andi's getting used to that he tells her about the Apocalypse and really ruins her day. The human race will perish unless Eric's Gamalian superiors step in. Abducted and trapped on an alien ship, Andi must convince the Gamalians her world is worth saving. Or escape from their clutches and save it herself.

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If you asked Andi Turbot whether she had anything in common with Flash Gordon she’d say no, emphatically. Saving the world is for dynamic, go-ahead, leaders of men and while it would be nice to see a woman getting involved for a change, she believes she could be the least well equipped being in her Galaxy for the job.

Then her best friend, Eric, reveals that he is an extra terrestrial. He’s not just any ET either. He’s Gamalian: seven-foot, lobster-shaped and covered in marmite-scented goo. Just when Andi's getting used to that he tells her about the Apocalypse and really ruins her day.

The human race will perish unless Eric’s Gamalian superiors step in. Abducted and trapped on an alien ship, Andi must convince the Gamalians her world is worth saving. Or escape from their clutches and save it herself.
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