A Nameless Witch
by A. Lee Martinez
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Description
Being born undead can have its disadvantages, such as eternal youth and flawless beauty-things most unsuitable for a witch. Hiding behind the guise of a grimy old crone, the witch is content living outside Fort Stalwart with her unlikely band of allies: a troll named Gwurm, an enchanted broom, and a demonic duck named Newt. She leads a simple life filled with spells, potions, and the occasional curse. So when a White Knight arrives at Fort Stalwart, the witch knows that her days of peace are show more at an end. The Knight is just days in front of a horde of ravenous goblings, and Fort Stalwart lies right in the horde's path. But the goblings are just the first wave of danger, and soon the witch and the Knight must combine forces on a perilous quest to stop a mad sorcerer from destroying the world. show lessTags
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anonymous user A Nameless Witch reads a lot like Terry Pratchett novels. Try the Wee Free Men / Tiffany Aching books (more for children, but enjoyed by adults) or try any of his Discworld series that involve the witches (targeted for adults). The books have the same attitude toward what it really takes to be "witchy."
22
Litrvixen Both books are about monstrous beings falling in love with someone who hunts them
Member Reviews
This was an easy, fun read with some real truths tucked away in the corners. The characters were unique and well fleshed out. The Nameless Witch with her curse of immortality was an amazing person who was just the opposite of what people expected in a witch. I loved her wise cracking familiar Newt. The tongue in cheek comedy kept the story light and made it an enjoyable story right up to the very end. This was not a m/m romance and while there was a hope at romance between the witch and Wyst, the story was more about following your own reality. There was a HEA of sorts in my opinion. This was a good book to kickoff the Halloween reading season.
A Nameless Witch is yet another of Martinez' humorous novels awash in the supernatural. The humor in this book is more quiet than his previous two and tends toward the wry.
A nameless witch is on a quest ... a quest of vengeance and, hopefully, self discovery. But mostly vengeance. She takes along her contentious familiar, a demon duck. Ok, let me say that again. A demon duck. With a bad case of blood lust. As my husband noted at dinner the other night, this duck is probably the funniest duck in all of recent literature. And his name is Newt.
Along the way, a troll and a knight join the quest. The troll is rather endearing and the knight is virtuous. He is a White Knight. A dark skinned White Knight to be specific.
Nameless is a very show more beautiful witch. Of course, everyone knows that witches look like hags ... right? So every attempt is made by Nameless to hide her incredible beauty underneath rags and dirt and a carefully placed wart or two. Wyst, the White Knight, is able to see beneath the hag routine and falls in love. She too is smitten, but knows she must hide her increasing attraction to the knight in order to protect his virtue and his life. You see, Nameless is a witch who can not tell the difference between "a smitten heart or accursed appetite." She is afraid she will lose control in the heat of passion and eat him, literally. Ok, so moving on ...
One of my favorite bits pokes fun at the old Norwegian tale of the Three Billy Goats Gruff. The questing party comes to a bridge guarded by a pack of surly elves, goblins and ogres who demand a toll. "As a troll, Gwurm knew something about bridge-tolling" so, of course, he negotiates. Various demands and threats are made by the leader of the surly bunch who ends his diatribe with a laugh meant to send chills down the spines of the hearers. Unfortunately, "elf voices are terrible for sinister cackling." Not in the least intimidated, Newt asks: "Can I kill him?"
On the more thoughtful side, Martinez includes some passages like this one:
"Your conscience is your misery...."
"Conscience is my burden, but all worthwhile gifts have their price...."
"But it could be so simple" the ghoul hissed. "Why hold on to that which only makes your life difficult?"
"Because life is complicated and difficult. Anyone who says otherwise hasn't truly lived."
Martinez throws in a few philosophical musings in A Nameless Witch making it a bit more thoughtful than his previous books, but it remains overall a dark comedy. show less
A nameless witch is on a quest ... a quest of vengeance and, hopefully, self discovery. But mostly vengeance. She takes along her contentious familiar, a demon duck. Ok, let me say that again. A demon duck. With a bad case of blood lust. As my husband noted at dinner the other night, this duck is probably the funniest duck in all of recent literature. And his name is Newt.
Along the way, a troll and a knight join the quest. The troll is rather endearing and the knight is virtuous. He is a White Knight. A dark skinned White Knight to be specific.
Nameless is a very show more beautiful witch. Of course, everyone knows that witches look like hags ... right? So every attempt is made by Nameless to hide her incredible beauty underneath rags and dirt and a carefully placed wart or two. Wyst, the White Knight, is able to see beneath the hag routine and falls in love. She too is smitten, but knows she must hide her increasing attraction to the knight in order to protect his virtue and his life. You see, Nameless is a witch who can not tell the difference between "a smitten heart or accursed appetite." She is afraid she will lose control in the heat of passion and eat him, literally. Ok, so moving on ...
One of my favorite bits pokes fun at the old Norwegian tale of the Three Billy Goats Gruff. The questing party comes to a bridge guarded by a pack of surly elves, goblins and ogres who demand a toll. "As a troll, Gwurm knew something about bridge-tolling" so, of course, he negotiates. Various demands and threats are made by the leader of the surly bunch who ends his diatribe with a laugh meant to send chills down the spines of the hearers. Unfortunately, "elf voices are terrible for sinister cackling." Not in the least intimidated, Newt asks: "Can I kill him?"
On the more thoughtful side, Martinez includes some passages like this one:
"Your conscience is your misery...."
"Conscience is my burden, but all worthwhile gifts have their price...."
"But it could be so simple" the ghoul hissed. "Why hold on to that which only makes your life difficult?"
"Because life is complicated and difficult. Anyone who says otherwise hasn't truly lived."
Martinez throws in a few philosophical musings in A Nameless Witch making it a bit more thoughtful than his previous books, but it remains overall a dark comedy. show less
It's funny, as I type this I realize how I often start my reviews exactly the same way. "So-and-so is a such-and-such." It is brought to my attention now because, as the title of this book suggests, it is about a witch with no name. I stared at a blank word document on my computer, with a habitual desire to type "So-and-so" with what I suppose must have been a blank and thoughtless look on my face as I realized that wasn't an option this time.
So anyway, A Nameless Witch is a humorous book about a nameless girl, who was born undead because her family was cursed by a wizard long ago. Her family shuns her and locks her in the basement, where she spends most of her youth. The best day of her life might be the day a passing witch buys her, show more and teaches her the ways of witchliness. It will eventually lead her down a path frought with danger, but also utter silliness. I mean, when your witch's familiar is a demon trapped in a duck's body comedy will surely ensue.
I've really enjoyed the 3 other books I've read by A. Lee Marinez, and this is one of my favorites. Even though the main character has no name and may feel distant in this review, she feels very real in the story. I also suspect her hodgepodge group of companions will stick in my mind for awhile, it's an interesting and diverse cast that leads to a lot of great humor. Speaking of which, my own complaint about the book is that the comedy is a bit 1-dimensional, the author doesn't add a lot of new elements to the mix so the jokes start drying up about halfway through the book, but this was made up for by a great group of characters and a well-paced plot. I didn't even mind the romantic bits, and those can really kill a book for me sometimes.
Overall I'm very pleased with A Nameless Witch. As I always seem to say when I finish a book by this author, I'm already looking forward to reading the next one! show less
So anyway, A Nameless Witch is a humorous book about a nameless girl, who was born undead because her family was cursed by a wizard long ago. Her family shuns her and locks her in the basement, where she spends most of her youth. The best day of her life might be the day a passing witch buys her, show more and teaches her the ways of witchliness. It will eventually lead her down a path frought with danger, but also utter silliness. I mean, when your witch's familiar is a demon trapped in a duck's body comedy will surely ensue.
I've really enjoyed the 3 other books I've read by A. Lee Marinez, and this is one of my favorites. Even though the main character has no name and may feel distant in this review, she feels very real in the story. I also suspect her hodgepodge group of companions will stick in my mind for awhile, it's an interesting and diverse cast that leads to a lot of great humor. Speaking of which, my own complaint about the book is that the comedy is a bit 1-dimensional, the author doesn't add a lot of new elements to the mix so the jokes start drying up about halfway through the book, but this was made up for by a great group of characters and a well-paced plot. I didn't even mind the romantic bits, and those can really kill a book for me sometimes.
Overall I'm very pleased with A Nameless Witch. As I always seem to say when I finish a book by this author, I'm already looking forward to reading the next one! show less
What's it like to be undead? For the Nameless Witche, cursed with deadly beauty and an appetite for human flesh, it means being cut in half doesn't really slow you down much. With her familiar, a demon-possessed, foul-mouthed, homicidal talking duck, her faithful broom and a troll companion, the Nameless Witch is content to live near Fort Stalwart, learning about humans and attempting not to eat them. But fate has other plans. A gobling (aptly namedcreatures- they eat everything in sight) horde is on the march - straight toward the fort. To make matters worse, the White Knight who warns of the horde's approach is both dreamy and especially tasty looking. What's a girl to do when she can't decide which impulse to answer - make love or show more make lunch?!
Martinez's humor is tongue in cheek and often twisted, but still a riot. If you enjoy your fantasy edgy, sharp of wit, and more than a bit gory, give this one a try. show less
Martinez's humor is tongue in cheek and often twisted, but still a riot. If you enjoy your fantasy edgy, sharp of wit, and more than a bit gory, give this one a try. show less
The unnamed witch was kept chained in her parents basement until she was eighteen, when an older witch (Ghastly Edna) came to take her on as an apprentice. Her family had been cursed generations ago, that the sixth child of every generation would always be an abomination – this particular girl was curse with unnatural beautiful and a hunger for raw meat (specifically human flesh).
When Ghastly Edna is murdered, the unnamed witch goes on a quest for vengeance, accompanied by her demonic duck and an enchanted broom. Along the way they meet up with a troll (Gwurm) and a White Knight (Wyst of the West) who join them on their quest.
They are faced with four trials on their way to find and defeat the evil sorcerer who murdered Ghastly Edna, show more but can the unnamed witch keep her hunger for Wyst’s flesh at bay long enough to get revenge?
The Review
Martinez wrote a believable female main character – not a kick-ass female, but a believable one. This isn’t something that every male author can pull off as well, so I was definitely impressed in that respect. There was something about her that was undeniably female, and as everything was narrated in first person, we got to hear all of the unnamed witch’s thoughts. I was actually surprised when I realized, afterwards, that the author was male.
Wyst of the West, the White Knight, was rather boring, rather one-dimensional… but the other main characters (Newt, the witch’s familiar, and Gwurm, a friendly troll) were a lot of fun. Especially Newt – an demonic duck who can talk but has forgotten how to fly? As far as Wyst goes, I think it was because he was so pure – even though he was struggling with his attraction to the unnamed witch, it still feels like there’s no depth to him, nothing of substance that he really wrestles with.
The plot itself was okay – but slightly predictable. The highlight of the book was the humour. It was an amusing book, and that’s what drove me to keep reading the book. Specifically in relation to Newt, who was by far my favourite character in the book:
Newt had a particular way of walking. His bowlegged swagger seemed more ridiculous than a traditional waddle. I’d told him once, and he’d told me to mind my own business. So I did. Even if he did walk like a bird with a rash between his legs.
The Bottom Line
I would be willing to read more of Martinez’s books, but this one overall was only okay. I won’t be keeping it, but I’m happy that I have been introduced to Martinez’s works. show less
When Ghastly Edna is murdered, the unnamed witch goes on a quest for vengeance, accompanied by her demonic duck and an enchanted broom. Along the way they meet up with a troll (Gwurm) and a White Knight (Wyst of the West) who join them on their quest.
They are faced with four trials on their way to find and defeat the evil sorcerer who murdered Ghastly Edna, show more but can the unnamed witch keep her hunger for Wyst’s flesh at bay long enough to get revenge?
The Review
Martinez wrote a believable female main character – not a kick-ass female, but a believable one. This isn’t something that every male author can pull off as well, so I was definitely impressed in that respect. There was something about her that was undeniably female, and as everything was narrated in first person, we got to hear all of the unnamed witch’s thoughts. I was actually surprised when I realized, afterwards, that the author was male.
Wyst of the West, the White Knight, was rather boring, rather one-dimensional… but the other main characters (Newt, the witch’s familiar, and Gwurm, a friendly troll) were a lot of fun. Especially Newt – an demonic duck who can talk but has forgotten how to fly? As far as Wyst goes, I think it was because he was so pure – even though he was struggling with his attraction to the unnamed witch, it still feels like there’s no depth to him, nothing of substance that he really wrestles with.
The plot itself was okay – but slightly predictable. The highlight of the book was the humour. It was an amusing book, and that’s what drove me to keep reading the book. Specifically in relation to Newt, who was by far my favourite character in the book:
Newt had a particular way of walking. His bowlegged swagger seemed more ridiculous than a traditional waddle. I’d told him once, and he’d told me to mind my own business. So I did. Even if he did walk like a bird with a rash between his legs.
The Bottom Line
I would be willing to read more of Martinez’s books, but this one overall was only okay. I won’t be keeping it, but I’m happy that I have been introduced to Martinez’s works. show less
I really enjoyed this whimsical adventure that was reminiscent of The Princess Bride. I adored the quirky characters and enjoyed the plot. My only complaint was that it felt a little rushed; so much packed in for such a short story. It did feel a touch repetitive when mentioning her lust/cannibalism and her need to always hide her beauty. I also felt it could have had a 'happy ending' for the star crossed lovers without it feeling cheesy.
As for the nameless witch, I was feeling either Serena or Willow...
But in the end, I still loved the journey.
As for the nameless witch, I was feeling either Serena or Willow...
But in the end, I still loved the journey.
Imagine if you will a nameless witch cursed with beauty, the inability to die and a hunger for flesh. Such a life would not be an easy one and indeed, for our nameless witch, it means a tortured childhood filled with little but neglect until she is found by her mentor. Time passes as it does and our witch wakes to discover that today is the day her mentor is going to die. The witch now has a choice to make, she can seek revenge for the one person she ever loved, in the process taking on a quest that will force her to confront her true nature, perhaps find love and actually die, or she can take a different road. Nothing is ever simple in the life of a nameless witch, even with companions like a demon duck, a troll, an animated broom and show more an honest to goodness White knight for a love interest, events might demand more from her witchly nature that she can possibly defeat.
As you might have guessed from my synopsis, A Nameless Witch is quirky and ridiculously delightful. It is clearly set in an alternate world because the witch, does not cause much of a concern to the residents of Fort Stalwart. The humans are in fact more concerned that the witch just might be a prostitute in disguise because the prostitutes outnumber the men 3:1 and this of course has over saturated the market. Since the economy of Fort Stalwart is largely based in prostitution, one can easily see how this is a problem.
The nameless witch is a fascinating protagonist. Though she is a witch who consumes raw meat and has a forked tongue, she is cursed with beauty. Her hair shines, her breasts are perky and her behind round and firm. The nameless witch goes to much effort to hide her curse by covering herself in dirt, ugly clothing and affecting a limp. The beauty she despises makes her quest to live a good witchly life difficult. Through it all, people still see through her mask, making her more determined to hide. I found this to be quite the interesting twist on the well known trope of the beautiful woman bemoaning her perfect ddd breast size.
There are three strong female characters in this novel. The relationship between the nameless witch and Sunrise while loving, does fixate far too much on the the nameless witch's infatuation with Wyst. That means that it does not come close to passing the Bechdel Test. Though we are told that the Nameless Witch and Ghastly Edna have a long relationship, we don't actually see them spend much time together. We are however are informed throughout the novel about the lessons which Ghastly Edna taught her protege and its clear that the love between the two women is strong.
Read More show less
As you might have guessed from my synopsis, A Nameless Witch is quirky and ridiculously delightful. It is clearly set in an alternate world because the witch, does not cause much of a concern to the residents of Fort Stalwart. The humans are in fact more concerned that the witch just might be a prostitute in disguise because the prostitutes outnumber the men 3:1 and this of course has over saturated the market. Since the economy of Fort Stalwart is largely based in prostitution, one can easily see how this is a problem.
The nameless witch is a fascinating protagonist. Though she is a witch who consumes raw meat and has a forked tongue, she is cursed with beauty. Her hair shines, her breasts are perky and her behind round and firm. The nameless witch goes to much effort to hide her curse by covering herself in dirt, ugly clothing and affecting a limp. The beauty she despises makes her quest to live a good witchly life difficult. Through it all, people still see through her mask, making her more determined to hide. I found this to be quite the interesting twist on the well known trope of the beautiful woman bemoaning her perfect ddd breast size.
There are three strong female characters in this novel. The relationship between the nameless witch and Sunrise while loving, does fixate far too much on the the nameless witch's infatuation with Wyst. That means that it does not come close to passing the Bechdel Test. Though we are told that the Nameless Witch and Ghastly Edna have a long relationship, we don't actually see them spend much time together. We are however are informed throughout the novel about the lessons which Ghastly Edna taught her protege and its clear that the love between the two women is strong.
Read More show less
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- Canonical title
- A Nameless Witch
- Original title
- A Nameless Witch
- Original publication date
- 2007
- People/Characters
- The Witch; Gwurm the Troll; Wyst of the West, a White Knight; Newt the Demonic Duck; Ghastly Edna; Pik (show all 10); Penelope the Witch's Broom; Sunrise; The Captain; Soulless Gustav, sorcerer Incarnate
- Important places
- Fort Stalwart
- Dedication
- To Mom:
It goes without saying that I couldn't have done this without her. I'm saying it anway.
To the DJW Writer's Workshop:
A place that proves if you get enough talented people in a room, one or two are bound ... (show all)to offer some helpful advice. Kind of like monkeys with typewriters.
To Michele:
A gifted writer, intelligent and funny. And for the record, NOT a bigger Buffy fan than me.
And lastly, to the Huntsman:
"Into Action!" is his cry. - First words
- I was born dead
- Quotations
- Fate was an energetic child with a short attention span.
- Last words
- (Click to show. Warning: May contain spoilers.)And every time my name was never spoken
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