My Ex-Life

Immensely enjoyable and strangely apropos for me as something so similar has happened in my own family, with my brother and his ex-wife, so that it was almost eerie to read about the two of main characters, the ex-es, deciding to share a property. It's somewhat courageous too, as McCauley is willing to blur the lines between what relationships are all about, say, maybe you only want to have sex with one gender or the other, but really you prefer your closest friends be the other, and, maybe you would even prefer to live with your closest friend not the people you have sex with. We tend to want everything so neat and tidy and it isn't. Plenty else is going on, issues with the adolescent daughter of a second marriage, for example, and show more McCauley isn't aiming for great literary heights (or depths, or whatever) but he has his finger on the pulse of the current moment. Charming and fun and in an in-between place of not hard to read but not shallow either. **** show less

How many out-loud guffaws = hilarious? I heard the author at a reading and he had the audience in his palm, and I knew him from his breakout novel, The Object Of My Affection. This one is set in Rockport/Gloucester, MA and San Francisco, and there's a bunch of enjoyable real estate porn happening on each coast. David, the protagonist, is summoned from West to East to rescue his former wife Julie from her second ex-husband, who is horrible, and who is trying to wrest their rundown Victorian away from her so he can fund a renovation of his awful restaurant. David's coming out ended his marriage to Julie decades earlier, and he's also a college counselor, the perfect person to help out Julie's daughter Mandy - not Amanda, but yes, Mandy, show more as in Barry Manilow - thanks, second ex-husband. Julie smokes too much weed and cannot get motivated to pull herself out of her various dilemmas, and Mandy is heading down a dangerous path with a creepy older man. David narrates most of the novel, and he's such a bright and shining angel of a man - dumped by his lover for a younger man, and on the verge of having his longtime cheap San Francisco rental bought out from under him by that very same lover. He's a quivering mass of mess on the inside, but he's able to spread calm winningly all around him. The twist at the end is a bit silly but does not ruin the fun of the Sedaris-ness of McCauley's quips and raging self-doubt. It's the type of book that lures you to a bed, chaise lounge, or hammock, forsaking all else until you’re done.

Quotes: "It was similar to her sureness that she understood the specifics of the civil war in Syria - yes, but one pointed question and it all unraveled."

"She and her husband were wine connoisseurs, which is to say, incipient alcoholics with money."

"I know you well enough to know you wouldn't say that unless you didn't mean it."

"The role of the person who's left a relationship is to show that he still cares and feels fondly for the person he abandoned, while the role of the abandoned is to show that he has no feelings whatsoever."

"Amira had a nickname for the downtown of Beauport: "The Horror Of Little Shops."

"Misery does love company, but no one likes to have theirs trumped." show less

My Ex-Life by Stephen McCauley started out almost laugh-out-loud funny, but then happily it settled down into a marvelously written, snarky, sarcastic, still laugh-out-loud-funny-moments glimpse into people’s lives and how they respond to some of life’s challenges and turning points. Readers that don’t like social commentary in their books or don’t approve of the lifestyle choices the characters made in the past and make now may be quick to dislike this book, but they should give it a chance. It is well worth it. Like it or not, the world is a varied, wild place and these main characters are part of it, and, Stephen McCauley does an absolutely amazing job of describing them and the current events in their lives.

Although in my show more “real life” I am not particularly like any of the main characters, I could feel their emotions, their loyalty, their love, their pain, their trust, and their fear of making bad decisions that will stick with them the rest of their lives. Even though the relationships and situations may be unique, it’s still a second chance story, a story of people just looking to survive the crossroads they are at, do the right thing and be happy. The way the author describes how people act, how people react, why they do what they do, how they judge people and why was eerily accurate. I live in the greater San Francisco area and that, too, was like being there.

The story is very well-written and the pace was perfect. There were just enough little twists and turns that I couldn’t put it down because I was so engaged with the characters, wanting to see what would happen next and hoping things would all work out. And just enjoying the fantastic writing along the way.

This was the first book I have read by Stephen McCauley, but it will not be the last. The best way I can describe it is to say that it was just comfortable, easy to read and sprinkled with witty, spot-on observances, easy to empathize with the characters and feel anxious with them wondering if things can turn out all right or not.

Thanks to the publisher Flatiron Books for providing an early copy to me. I highly recommend it. show less

I love books that define family in non-traditional ways. This is definitely a fresh take on the concept. David and Julie had been married briefly around 20 years ago due to a pregnancy and both moved on in totally new directions with no hard feelings after a miscarriage. David figured out he was gay, and Julie re-married and gave birth to a daughter, Mandy. Now they live on opposite coasts (Julie in MA and David in CA). Life and circumstantial changes bring them together again - orchestrated by Mandy who is 17 and in the process of college applications - which is David's job. She invites him east for a visit in the summer and the truth of his life and Julie's emerge - but in rather dire housing transitions. Julie is going thru a divorce show more and her ex wants the house. She is renting out rooms thru Air BnB to try to make the money to keep it. David's long-time lease has been bought out and his ex and his new husband are the ones behind it. Meanwhile, Mandy is in a teenage crisis, hooked up with a creepy older guy who has hired her for internet porn. Despite this confluence of difficulties, there is a lot of humor and warmth - David and Julie's relationship is delightful. He is determined to help her keep the house, and together they start to fix it up. He also decides to pursue a lawsuit against his CA landlady in the hopes that the money can help Julie and Mandy. He 'fathers' Mandy better than her real father does. (Henry is a bit of a villain here) and eventually saves her from her bad choices. The span of the summer provides an opportunity for this unlikely family to gel and to face the past and still like each other in the process. David is the show-stealer for his calm and wisdom, one-liners, ("Money is easier to dispense than affection, even for the most miserly." p.253) and ability to see things and people for what they are. Everything comes to a head at the end of August and summer's end brings a new beginning for all. show less

I really disliked this book. I read it only because it’s next up in my face-to-face book club. I found the plot contrived and sometimes even unbelievable. I thought the characters, for the most part, were insipid and inane. I look forward to our book club’s discussion of it: why did the person who selected it choose it? Did others like it? Why? Is there a difference in age between those who like it and those who dislike it? Perhaps my age and life experience adversely affected my appreciation of this book.

Most of the time I couldn't decide whether to laugh or cry while reading this book about David, who travels from San Francisco to visit his ex-wife Julie, and her daughter Mandy. David's boyfriend has just left him for a wealthy surgeon, and his rented home is being sold out from under him. He makes his living counseling (wealthy) teenagers and their parents through the college selection and application process. David works with Mandy on college applications, helps Julie spruce up the Airbnb she's running, and falls back into an easy friendship with Julie. The plot thickens: Mandy is making some very bad choices, and doesn't know why; Julie's second ex-husband is a jerk; and there's one thing about their marriage that Julie never told show more David. Secondary characters add interest, complications, and comic relief. I also loved Opal, the 3 legged dog. Enjoy! show less

Thank you to the publishers and the author for the chance to read this book in advance!

I really enjoyed this novel and I think I can pinpoint the exact reason as to why: I have never before read someone describe human nature and thoughts in such a scarily accurate yet comprehensible way. I felt like Stephen McCauley was inside my brain. Or maybe I was inside his, I don't know. The way he describes how people act, how people react, why they do what they do, how they judge people and why...I don't think he has any degrees in psychology, but he could have fooled me.

He tells the story of three main characters, David, Julie and Mandy. A single gay male, a straight, single mother, an emotional and confused teenage daughter. I can't speak for show more the first two, but I can speak for being a confused, angst-ridden teenage daughter. I don't think Mr. McCauley can speak for being that as well but you wouldn't know it. Maybe he was a teenage girl in his past life because damned if he didn't nail the feelings and the anger and the reactions of a hormonal teenage girl on the head. He just KNOWS AND WRITES ABOUT IT SO WELL IT'S KIND OF SCARY.

Besides him being a mind-reader and a wizard with putting the human psyche into words, Mr. McCauley wrote a captivating story about just really normal people. Really run-of-the-mill-could-be-your-neighbors people. I like these kinds of stories where nobody is spectacular and nobody is outrageous but they are still interesting and have fascinating stories to tell.

I look forward to reading more of Mr. McCauley's works. show less