Dale Loves Sophie to Death

Every summer, while her husband works in the city, a woman takes the family goes out of town and rents the house she grew up in.

It's full of memories, both pleasant and painful. Her relationship with her father has been very troubled but via the children it gradually thaws. She gradually stops blaming her parents for imagined hurts and takes responsibility for her life, her marriage and her children.

Confusing, overwrought and too much introspection and navel gazing for my liking. I struggled to muster any interest in the heroine's summer of silly emotional tumults.

Great book. Not filled with exciting action, but it is packed with the subtleties of real relationships between parents and children, marriage partners, and between friends. It reminds me of Marilynne Robinson's writing in some ways. A slow pace but an intriguing drawing out of the way people's relationships develop and change. In many ways this quote near the end of the novel encapsulates a lot of the story's message.

"But she knew that her father had just said to her what she would someday long to say to her own children: God knows what cruelties you may have suffered at my hands, but this is how I meant to love you: without reservation. Dinah also knew that there would never be a child who could believe that."

Beautifully written, with penetrating observations, but not a fast action plot, so will be frustrating for those who want a story. More a study of a family in the trying circumstances of daily living.

The title comes from graffiti scrawled on a highway overpass. It becomes a landmark for the family, signifying they're approaching home, and a touchstone for thought for the main character of the book. It reminded me of the restaurant in Syracuse, I think, called Pinhead Susan's. For years, there had been graffiti on an overpass saying "Susan is a pinhead". The graffiti was eventually removed, but the restaurant near the overpass immortalized it in their name. Loved the cover, too.

I thought this was going to be hard review to write while I was reading the book, but after some days have past since I finished it, I have discovered that my memory of the book and the points that I wanted to bring up are gone - serves me right for not writing this stuff down when it came to me.

The story is focused on Dinah Howells, a mother of three in her late 30's, but flips to her husband's point of view from time to time. For the most part, Dinah is a product of her upbringing - the daughter of an interior designer mom and a psychologist dad raised in the small town of Enfield, Ohio. Even though she lives in Massachusetts with her professor husband and children, Dinah and the children have returned to Enfield every summer for the show more past eight years while her husband spends most of the summer in Massachusetts to work. Dinah's relationship with her parents is strained - as are most of her relationships - and it is only over the course of the story that certain facts are revealed to the reader.

To quote one of the three reviews currently posted on Librarything: "Confusing, overwrought and too much introspection and navel gazing for my liking." sums this one up nicely. There is nothing likeable about any of the characters. They are all whiny, self-centered individuals that do not seem to understand how to love, care or give, unless it is as some 'over the top' reaction or outburst. Ironically, the story has a languid flow to it. Even when startling events occur, they occur without emotionally involving the reader and appear as though viewed through thick, bottle glass - you can see what is going on but it is a bit blurry and muffled.

So, you are probably wondering about the title for the story and exactly how it fits in with the story. Who are Dale and Sophie? We don't know. 'Dale Loves Sophie to Death', we are told, is graffiti emblazoned on the railway bridge the Howells drive under every summer on their way to Enfield and tends to mark their final approach into Enfield after two days of driving. The following quote where Dinah chastises her husband is a good excerpt to exemplify this story:

"You think that 'Dale Loves Sophie to Death' should be typed. And tacked up on a little bulletin board in Jesse Hall. You know, there's something about real, honest-to-God emotion - I mean real things that real people go around feeling - that you just never can understand. I mean, 'Dale Loves Sophie to Death' is not exactly a lower-case sentiment! I don't think you know a damned thing about that! You just go mincing through your life with almost nothing but lower-case sentiments!"

If introspective examinations of personal and family life written in languid and florid prose appeals to you - I know, that sounds like a contradiction but the story has both - this is probably your kind of story. For me, it was a book that I almost Pearl-ruled, decided to stick with it, grew to appreciate some aspects of the story but for the most part it fell somewhat flat of its mark. show less

There's something lovely about this portrait of gracious living in a small Ohio town. The intimate, episodes, elegantly detailed and loosely interwoven, recalls Virginia Woolf. Nothing much happens, although love manages to be affirmed in spite of family dysfunction.

another slight, domestic novel; Dinah returns to Enfield (OH) every summer with her children, while her husband Martin stays in New England -- the summer described is filled crises, revelation, unknown betrayal, and recognition

(2/10) This might be a bit unfair seeing as I only read a chapter and a half but I was so bored I just didn't care enough to continue, if the whole book continues in the same minute introspection I'm glad I stopped, give me a book with a story anyday!

From what I read I hated Dinah, she cares far too much about herself and her own thoughts. The only person I liked was her mother because she picked up on the fake illness and rolled her eyes at it exactly as I did, this is definitely not my kind of book.