This memoir follows the life of Jill Duggar including her relationship with her parents and the IBLP. Many aspects resonate with what others have experienced--high control, misogyny, lack of emotional validation, etc. Her struggles will resonate with anyone coming out of this environment; however, while she speaks candidly about the issues involved, some areas continue to be a struggle for her to see fully including her parents role in covering her brother's sexual abuse.

I grew up watching both shows with my Mom, and even admired the family. I wanted my life to look like similar to theirs…minus the skirts all the time. But what you see isn’t always the truth. I respect Jill for telling her story and to be able to heal from everything she has gone through. I admire that she is able to hold on to her faith and focus on the true gospel. ( )

I read Becoming Free Indeed by Jinger Vuolo, so I decided to also read her sister Jill Dillard's book Counting the Cost. These were two very different books. While essentially dealing with the same situation and experience, Jill's book described in more detail her personal experience with her family, especially her father, and also touched on her awakening to the agenda of the IBLP. Jinger's was more focused on the IBLP and her spiritual journey. That being said, I did find this memoir interesting. It really opened the door on what life was like in the Duggar household. It didn't shy away from the ugly things, but didn't give out the private details that I really didn't want or need to know. One of the things that stood out to me was the relationship Jill has with her husband. Considering their time together before marriage was short and chaperoned, Derick has really been her rock. Jill's father basically chose him for her and encouraged the relationship only to later be faced with a strong Christian man who took his vows seriously and stood with his wife during some truly tough times. Derick had the strength to stand nose to nose with Jill's father without fear. I don't think he had any idea what he was in for when he became part of the family. I really felt for her and I'm glad she has a strong support system including a therapist. Writing this book had to be therapeutic even though I'm sure it re-opened some of the gaps with her family. She over and over stated that she loves her family and her parents and I while some may question if telling this story was a loving thing to do, I don't think that is for us to judge. I hope that she as well as her other family members have time now to just go on and live their lives. Looking ahead rather than back. All in all, I'm glad I read it. ( )

Lost Count
I had hoped to have a stronger connection with this book, given my support for victims, but I encountered significant difficulty while reading it. My struggle wasn't due to the writing itself but rather the language employed within. It became evident that the author was attempting to navigate a delicate path, indicating that she may not yet be fully prepared to open up and is still grappling with her upbringing.

The author's narrative conveyed a sense that she primarily attributes her father's wrongdoing to financial matters, while her mother appears to bear no responsibility for what transpired in her life. She paints her childhood as if it were a fairytale upbringing, yet it lacks acknowledgment of the inherent flaws and issues that existed.

The impact of Jill's homeschooling experience becomes evident throughout this book. It's important to clarify that this isn't a critique of the book's writing quality; in fact, it's well-written. However, my perspective on the writing style might be influenced by the fact that I listened to the audiobook.

Jill's portrayal in the story leaves a distinct impression of timidity and apprehension, as if she's concerned about the possibility of a family member reading her words and inadvertently hurting her siblings. It raises a significant question: How can one fully express their truth when the fear of causing harm to others lingers in the background?

It falls somewhere between not bad and not good. What it needed wasn't more details or drama, but a deeper and more genuine examination of the author's life. I hope the author continues with therapy and eventually realizes that assessing one's childhood doesn't equate to its collapse. If evaluating anything, be it your upbringing, your relationships, or your faith, leads to its collapse, it suggests that it was already fragile before you began. ( )

Some of my family members recently read a book by one of Jill Duggar’s sisters, and highly recommended it. I haven’t taken the time to read that yet, even though my interest was piqued, but when I was looking for a book for a reading challenge recently, I realized Jill Duggar’s Counting the Cost fit one of my goals exactly. And what a read!

I was half afraid, going into the story, that this would be one of those tell-all “tear everyone else down and vindicate yourself” kind of stories. After reading it, though, I’m so grateful that it isn’t that. Yes, Jill dives into some very difficult things, and talks about tough aspects of her childhood and early adult years, but even people she may now distrust are not spoken about with a vitriolic attitude.

If I were to attribute a few one-word descriptions to this book, I’d call it honest, heartfelt, and impactful. I greatly enjoyed this read, and appreciated Jill taking the time to share her heart and experiences with those—like me—who have seen the shiny veneer of her family through their TV show, but don’t know the story behind the show. This was an encouraging read, and I’m grateful to have had the chance to get my hands on it. Recommended to anyone who enjoys reading memoirs about people who have had to step out in faith—especially those recovering from strict religious upbringings. ( )