Autobiography of a Face
by Lucy Grealy
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"Lucy Grealy's ruthless self-examination, rich fantasy life, and great derring-do inform this powerful memoir about the premium we put on beauty and on a woman's face in particular. It took Lucy twenty years of living with a distorted self-image and more than thirty reconstructive procedures before she could come to terms with her appearance after childhood surgery left her jaw disfigured. As a young girl she absorbed the searing pain of peer rejection and the guilty pleasures of wanting to show more be special. Later she internalized the paralyzing fear of never being loved. Heroically and poignantly, she learned to define herself from the inside out." "This memoir arrives at a time when the worship of beauty in our culture is at an all-time high, a time when more and more women seek physical perfection. Lucy Grealy awakens in us the difficult truth that beauty, finally, is to be found deep within."--BOOK JACKET. show lessTags
Recommendations
Member Recommendations
joaldo I recommend reading Autobiography of a Face first, then Truth and Beauty. Autobiography of a Face should be enjoyed for what it is, without being in some way 'tainted' by the harsher view of Lucy's friend, Ann Patchett. Reading Ann's book next will then give the reader a completely different perspective on the poet herself, her work, and on their friendship.
30
betsytacy An aspect of both memoirs is how the author dealt with a facial disfigurement. In Grealy's case it was the removal of a large part of her jaw after developing cancer at age nine. In Moss's case the disfigurement was caused by malnutrition, the result of growing up in an impoverished family with an alcoholic father.
mojobee autobiography, disfigurement
Member Reviews
When Lucy Grealy was 9 years old she was diagnosed with cancer, requiring a third of her jaw to be removed. While chemotherapy and radiation eventually made her cancer-free, reconstructing her jaw would be a very long and complicated process. Lucy faced her many surgeries with courage; dealing with friends, classmates, and adolescence in general was another matter entirely. More than anything, Lucy wanted not just to be accepted, but to be loved and desired. This book, published when Lucy was 31, is her story of personal growth. But it is so much more than a “disease memoir.” My edition included an afterword by her best friend, the author Ann Patchett, who does a far better job than I could at explaining this book as a work of show more literature, dealing with universal truths in the context of Lucy’s illness:
This is a book that understands how none of us ever feel we are pretty enough while it makes us question the very concept of beauty. It touches on our fears that love and approval are things we will always have to struggle to keep. It takes something so personal and so horrible that it is, for most of us, completely beyond our comprehension, and turns it into a mirror on ourselves.
Lucy was a poet and writer, who sadly died at age 39. Her talent is evident in the way she used her personal story, her quest for “beauty,” to create that mirror. I only wish we could hear more from her. show less
This is a book that understands how none of us ever feel we are pretty enough while it makes us question the very concept of beauty. It touches on our fears that love and approval are things we will always have to struggle to keep. It takes something so personal and so horrible that it is, for most of us, completely beyond our comprehension, and turns it into a mirror on ourselves.
Lucy was a poet and writer, who sadly died at age 39. Her talent is evident in the way she used her personal story, her quest for “beauty,” to create that mirror. I only wish we could hear more from her. show less
Lucy Grealy was nine years old when she was diagnosed with cancer (Ewing’s sarcoma) and underwent surgery that removed a third of her jaw. She spent the next five years battling the cancer with chemotherapy, radiation, and countless surgeries that were intended to re-shape her jaw. The treatments were brutal, something a child (or anyone, really) should never have to endure. Lucy spent these years in and out of hospitals, where, ironically, she felt most comfortable, as she was among other young cancer patients, and her plight was understood, even validated. It was when she finished her treatments and left the safety of the hospital (though she continued the chemotherapy as an outpatient), was when her life shifted, and she was forced show more to face the grim reality that her conception of who she was, pre-cancer, was inexorably changed forever.
Lucy eventually achieved remission from the cancer, but the aftermath of her illness was where a different journey began. Inevitably, when she returned to school, the vicious teasing, taunting, and bullying was relentless. Lucy did her best to keep her head down (literally), and silently endured the kind of cruelty only known by children, where being different in any way was tantamount to social purgatory. Lucy comes to accept that she is permanently disfigured, and will never truly fit in. Moreover, she realizes that she has endured more hardship than her peers, and finds comfort knowing she was strong enough to survive, and silently wonders if any of her schoolmates would have been strong enough to handle the physical and emotional pain she endured.
From her teens to young adulthood, Lucy underwent countless procedures in an effort to reconstruct her jaw. All of them failed. Her doctors tried grafts and bone reconstruction, but they never held and all were reabsorbed. All hopes that her face would take these procedures left her with hope that was eventually dashed, again and again.
Finding one’s identity is a central theme of the book. Much of Lucy’s identity was tied to her face. In an image-obsessed society, she cannot help but feel like she has failed, that she is a freak, and keeps hoping the next surgery will be the one that works, that her appearance will be nothing like the grotesque facial deformity that has dominated her life. She struggles with yearning to fit in, all while harboring a secret satisfaction that she is “special” in a very distressing way
Lucy was a highly gifted writer. She mainly wrote poetry before turning to memoir, and this book is indeed a poetic meditation on identity, the destructive effects of beauty standards, grievous suffering, and, ultimately, self-acceptance. Lucy was truly a fighter. She was a brave, searingly perceptive, and unabashed soul. Tragically, she died at 39, from a drug overdose.
I first read this book when I was 14. I was grappling with my own fears and insecurities related to how I felt about my own face, my body, my outward appearance, feeling, like many other teenage girls, that I was ugly and imperfect. Lucy’s account certainly put things into perspective. I love this book immensely, and I reread it almost every year. Needless to say, this is one of my most treasured books I own. show less
Lucy eventually achieved remission from the cancer, but the aftermath of her illness was where a different journey began. Inevitably, when she returned to school, the vicious teasing, taunting, and bullying was relentless. Lucy did her best to keep her head down (literally), and silently endured the kind of cruelty only known by children, where being different in any way was tantamount to social purgatory. Lucy comes to accept that she is permanently disfigured, and will never truly fit in. Moreover, she realizes that she has endured more hardship than her peers, and finds comfort knowing she was strong enough to survive, and silently wonders if any of her schoolmates would have been strong enough to handle the physical and emotional pain she endured.
From her teens to young adulthood, Lucy underwent countless procedures in an effort to reconstruct her jaw. All of them failed. Her doctors tried grafts and bone reconstruction, but they never held and all were reabsorbed. All hopes that her face would take these procedures left her with hope that was eventually dashed, again and again.
Finding one’s identity is a central theme of the book. Much of Lucy’s identity was tied to her face. In an image-obsessed society, she cannot help but feel like she has failed, that she is a freak, and keeps hoping the next surgery will be the one that works, that her appearance will be nothing like the grotesque facial deformity that has dominated her life. She struggles with yearning to fit in, all while harboring a secret satisfaction that she is “special” in a very distressing way
Lucy was a highly gifted writer. She mainly wrote poetry before turning to memoir, and this book is indeed a poetic meditation on identity, the destructive effects of beauty standards, grievous suffering, and, ultimately, self-acceptance. Lucy was truly a fighter. She was a brave, searingly perceptive, and unabashed soul. Tragically, she died at 39, from a drug overdose.
I first read this book when I was 14. I was grappling with my own fears and insecurities related to how I felt about my own face, my body, my outward appearance, feeling, like many other teenage girls, that I was ugly and imperfect. Lucy’s account certainly put things into perspective. I love this book immensely, and I reread it almost every year. Needless to say, this is one of my most treasured books I own. show less
How much pain, both physical and emotional, can one person endure? I am glad I read this book. After reading Ann Patchett’s memoir of their friendship, Truth and Beauty, I was interested to read about Lucy’s experience from her point of view. I’m ashamed to admit I was surprised at how lucid and how self-aware Lucy was (or maybe Ann Patchett would be even more ashamed). After suffering through two and a half years of chemotherapy and radiation treatments, young Lucy Grealy was left to experience the twin cruelties of being grateful to be alive, but with a face terribly disfigured from the removal of half of her jaw. She felt unlovable, yet drew people to her and demanded their affection. The book covers her childhood and early show more adult years and does not touch on the inevitable addiction to painkillers that Patchett’s memoir focuses on. show less
When still in childhood, Lucy is diagnosed with an invasive form of cancer that requires surgery to remove part of her jaw. Of course, before it comes to that, there are many many days in the hospital and countless tests. Being ill becomes not only her entire life, but a large part of her identity. No one fully explains to her what's happening and she has no sense that the forthcoming surgery will alter her appearance forever.
Following the surgery, she must endure over three years of chemotherapy treatments as well as radiation. Essentially, her entire life is consumed by her illness. What's worse than the pain and nausea, is the slowly dawning realization that her face is no longer socially acceptable. People openly stare at her and show more groups of young boys torment and verbally assault her on a daily basis.
Forced to confront the nature of her identity and the cruelty of mankind, she finds herself compelled to pursue surgery after surgery to correct her face sufficiently to recover anonymity. Even though she knows there is great injustice in her treatment, she still needs to live in this world that finds her unacceptable. Much meditation of beauty, ugliness, and society's pressure to conform follows.
This memoir is not for the faint of heart. However, in it's painful detail, I found myself encouraged by what a person can live through. The author calmly narrates what many of us have feared. It's extremely comforting to look directly into the heart of nightmare and death and not flinch away. Ms. Grealy has suffered in ways that most never will. She's been through astonishing pain and cruelty but has not died of it. Her story has power and beauty and much to teach everyone. show less
Following the surgery, she must endure over three years of chemotherapy treatments as well as radiation. Essentially, her entire life is consumed by her illness. What's worse than the pain and nausea, is the slowly dawning realization that her face is no longer socially acceptable. People openly stare at her and show more groups of young boys torment and verbally assault her on a daily basis.
Forced to confront the nature of her identity and the cruelty of mankind, she finds herself compelled to pursue surgery after surgery to correct her face sufficiently to recover anonymity. Even though she knows there is great injustice in her treatment, she still needs to live in this world that finds her unacceptable. Much meditation of beauty, ugliness, and society's pressure to conform follows.
This memoir is not for the faint of heart. However, in it's painful detail, I found myself encouraged by what a person can live through. The author calmly narrates what many of us have feared. It's extremely comforting to look directly into the heart of nightmare and death and not flinch away. Ms. Grealy has suffered in ways that most never will. She's been through astonishing pain and cruelty but has not died of it. Her story has power and beauty and much to teach everyone. show less
This was a difficult book to read, but one which I found beautifully written despite the emotional and physical pain suffered by the author throughout her entire story. As a child of nine, she was diagnosed with Ewing's sarcoma, which is a cancer that was treated with radical facial surgery. In order to prevent a recurrence of the life-threatening cancer, she had to undergo two and a half years of chemotherapy. Following that, she endured years and years of mostly disappointing plastic surgery on her jawline. She never felt that her face was sufficiently acceptable in the view of others although she was able to make friends after high school, attend college and direct her career toward writing.
This book made me want to be her friend. show more She always seemed so lonely and misunderstood because of her appearance. Her greatest solace during her younger years was with her companionship and work with horses. Both of the horses that she once owned met untimely ends. It all seemed so unfair.
In this book, the author mentioned a lot about flap procedures for plastic surgery. As a surgical oncology nurse back in the 1960s and 1970s, I remember patients with those flap procedures. They were horrible. Fortunately the author never had any of those that were proposed to her, but the surgical procedures which she did have (there were so many!) had terrribly disappointing results. It all seems unfair to me that a child had to suffer such a fate and continue to endure hardships as what this author faced year after year. She was a very brave person for telling her own story with such eloquence. show less
This book made me want to be her friend. show more She always seemed so lonely and misunderstood because of her appearance. Her greatest solace during her younger years was with her companionship and work with horses. Both of the horses that she once owned met untimely ends. It all seemed so unfair.
In this book, the author mentioned a lot about flap procedures for plastic surgery. As a surgical oncology nurse back in the 1960s and 1970s, I remember patients with those flap procedures. They were horrible. Fortunately the author never had any of those that were proposed to her, but the surgical procedures which she did have (there were so many!) had terrribly disappointing results. It all seems unfair to me that a child had to suffer such a fate and continue to endure hardships as what this author faced year after year. She was a very brave person for telling her own story with such eloquence. show less
Lucy Grealy was nine years old when she was diagnosed with Ewing’s Sarcoma, an aggressive bone cancer, in her right jaw. The surgery and chemo helped save her life but left her with disfiguring scars.
What is more important to your sense of self that to recognize yourself in the mirror? What if the face you saw in the mirror was one you could not bear to look at? A face that could not possibly reflect the you inside?
Grealy became a renowned poet, and her way with words shows here. She writes so eloquently and honestly about what she went through and how she felt growing up “ugly.” She writes about being the “special” kid in a family of four, getting more of her parents’ attention, skipping school, good friends, how she show more dealt with bullies, and how she became addicted to the pain killers she was prescribed following major surgery. Her life was not all tragic, however; she also remembers moments of joy and humorous escapades.
The memoir was first published in 1994. The edition I had included an afterword written after Grealy’s death in 2002, by her friend and fellow Iowa Writers Workshop student, Ann Patchett. show less
What is more important to your sense of self that to recognize yourself in the mirror? What if the face you saw in the mirror was one you could not bear to look at? A face that could not possibly reflect the you inside?
Grealy became a renowned poet, and her way with words shows here. She writes so eloquently and honestly about what she went through and how she felt growing up “ugly.” She writes about being the “special” kid in a family of four, getting more of her parents’ attention, skipping school, good friends, how she show more dealt with bullies, and how she became addicted to the pain killers she was prescribed following major surgery. Her life was not all tragic, however; she also remembers moments of joy and humorous escapades.
The memoir was first published in 1994. The edition I had included an afterword written after Grealy’s death in 2002, by her friend and fellow Iowa Writers Workshop student, Ann Patchett. show less
At age 9 Lucy was diagnosed with a cancer of the jaw. In this nonfiction memoir she chronicles her 5-year battle with the cancer and then the years that followed, during which she has dozens of reconstructive surgeries. More than the disease though, it's about Grealy's battle with learning to accept herself and feel comfortable in her own skin. It's about the universal struggle of feeling ugly. Grealy's story is a tragic one, but it's also beautiful.
"Beauty, as defined by society at large, seemed to be only about who was best at looking like everyone else."
If you find a copy to read, male sure it includes the afterward by author Ann Patchett that was added in 2003. Patchett was one of Grealy's best friends and later wrote the book show more "Truth and Beauty" about their friendship. I think she sums up Grealy's book perfectly with this...
"In the right hands, a memoir is the flecks of gold panned out of a great, muddy river. A memoir is those flecks melted down into a shapeable liquid that can be molded and hammered into a single, bright band to be worn on a finger, something you could say, "Oh this, this is my life." Everyone has a muddy river, but very few have the vision, patience and talent to turn it into something beautiful." show less
"Beauty, as defined by society at large, seemed to be only about who was best at looking like everyone else."
If you find a copy to read, male sure it includes the afterward by author Ann Patchett that was added in 2003. Patchett was one of Grealy's best friends and later wrote the book show more "Truth and Beauty" about their friendship. I think she sums up Grealy's book perfectly with this...
"In the right hands, a memoir is the flecks of gold panned out of a great, muddy river. A memoir is those flecks melted down into a shapeable liquid that can be molded and hammered into a single, bright band to be worn on a finger, something you could say, "Oh this, this is my life." Everyone has a muddy river, but very few have the vision, patience and talent to turn it into something beautiful." show less
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Author Information
2+ Works 2,338 Members
Lucy Grealy, an award-winning poet, was born in Ireland in 1963. She lived in the UK and in Germany but spent most of her life in New York, where she grew up, and where she died in 2002. She also published a collection of essays, As Seen on TV: Provocations
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Awards and Honors
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Common Knowledge
- Canonical title
- Autobiography of a Face
- Original publication date
- 1994
- People/Characters
- Lucy Grealy
- Dedication
- For my friends, whom I love
- First words
- My friend Stephen and I used to do pony parties together.
- Quotations
- Everybody from my mother to the characters I read about in books (who were as actual and important as real people to me), was always looking at someone else’s life and envying it, wishing to occupy it. I wanted them to stop... (show all), to see how much they had already, how they had their health and their strength. I imagined how my life would be if I had half their fortune.
Animals were both the lives I took care of and the lives who took care of me. Horses neither disapproved nor approved of what I looked like. All that counted was how I treated them, how my actions weighted themselves in this ... (show all)world. - Last words
- (Click to show. Warning: May contain spoilers.)I wanted to tell the man I was with about it, but he was involved in his own thoughts and I did not want to interrupt him, so instead I looked with curiousity at the window behind him, its night-silvered glass reflecting the entire cafe, to see if I could, now, recognize myself.
- Original language*
- Engels
*Some information comes from Common Knowledge in other languages. Click "Edit" for more information.
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- 362.1969947160092 — Society, government, & culture Social problems and social services Social Welfare People with physical illnesses Services to people with specific conditions Diseases Other diseases
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- RD661 .G74 .A3 — Medicine Surgery Surgery Neoplasms. Tumors. Oncology
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