Hole in My Life

If the purpose of a YA memoir is to be a cautionary tale, I suppose this is a good one. Certainly it will make any teen think twice about accepting a job on a sailboat that's running drugs from St. Croix to New York. But perhaps Gantos's story of life in prison will not prove to be such a disincentive, since he gets a job in the prison hospital and never has to live with the general population. His biggest problem seems to be boredom. So yes, be cautioned, but Gantos's experiences overall are too atypical to really have much chance of changing the course of someone's life.

Jack Gantos’ Hole in My Life is a mostly sobering, somewhat pathetic account of a young man beleaguered by aimlessness and finding himself floundering in this wide blue yonder of a country. Only after he finds himself in the biggest possible mess of a drug deal and works his way out of a rather vaguely defined prison sentence does he discover his purpose his life – a purpose he'd already defined but to which he could not commit.

Gantos is the product of a working class family whose patriarch just wants his son to keep his nose clean and make it out the hole and on to better things. But like so many restless youth who don’t quite find, or trust, their footing upon emerging from high school, Gantos couldn’t articulate the mark at show more which to aim his ambition.

Feeling like he wanted to be a writer, but having no role models nearby, he set out on that most familiar, all-too-vanilla and oft misleading fantasy of following Jack Kerouac’s vision and voice onto the open roads of America, or more specifically, Florida. Having had a hard time finishing high school due to family circumstances, once he makes it through, his restlessness gets the best of him, and he stupidly joins forces with a drug smuggler-dealer unit that eventually learns it has been under the watchful eye of the FBI. Gantos is eventually sentenced and jailed in a federal prison, but after his first night, finds an acquaintance crumpled up in a toilet stall – his “buddy” had been brutally raped. Luckily, for Gantos, who’d already been approached with a standard offer to become someone’s French female dog, his transfer to another minimum security setting came through right away; if having lice is a good omen, Gantos' lucky streak hit a serendipitous jackpot as an admitting medical assistant noticed Gantos’ was in need of delousing. He is then sent to a private cell, apart from general population; upon being examined about a week later by another medical assistant, Gantos pipes up, with all the aplomb of a man quick to keep himself in good stead, and asks about helping in the medical wing of the prison; wouldn’t you know it, they need an x-ray tech - snake eyes averted once again. He does his time, learns his lesson, gets rejected by the parole board, realizes the prison psych knows he's a fraud, sizes up his situation and straightens up, applies to college via his caseworker, and voila! - he is granted that second chance; and well, okay... good for him.

Hole in My Life is a light, easy, often comically pathetic - and not in a funny way - account of one dude’s trip through the judicial system; it is not gut-wrenching, and most of the poignant reflection moments along the way didn’t really stir much sympathy in this reader – this dude made what some might call a dumb, middle-class, first-world mistake, and thank goodness for him he wasn’t black or too ethnic. I went to college with dudes like Gantos - my college roommate in Vermont was doing four years probation for being part of a successful robbery crew in his suburban Connecticut, Stepford-like community. The only they got caught: hubris. Sadly for him, I was his roommate and told him had they bothered to read any Greek tragedies, their own might have been averted -- luckily, he was reader and he got the joke. Luck - Gantos sure has a lot of it after he's sentenced; but maybe it's not dumb luck, just destiny.

Sure, maybe the most chilling moment in this cautionary tale is the scene where he finds Lucas post-prison rape in a bathroom stall on the day his wife is supposed to visit him, but hey, it’s prison – this stuff happens…
Knowing that there are far too many low-level, minor offenders thrown in prison who are sentenced with ridiculously lengthy terms disproportionate to the crimes committed who have surely endured far worse for far longer, all because they were born with the wrong complexion, it’s kinda difficult to work up too much sympathy for Gantos.

It’s a good cautionary tale to share with kids/students who find themselves in the midst of a quandary, at a pivotal moment in life, and hopefully, reading something like this can get them to reconsider a life of crime or making a stupidly rash, uninformed choice like hooking up with a wiley coyote type a la Rik, the genius-snitch behind the operation.

Then again, some kids/students might be unimpressed by Gantos’ tale if they themselves are already too jaded or too streetwise to have made such a flawed decision. Then, it’s time to teach them the meaning of the word, hubris, and hope and pray they can read the tea leaves and get it right. show less

Hole In My Life by Jack Gantos is an autobiographical account of a two year period in the author’s early twenties when he decided to take a job smuggling drugs and ended up in prison for fifteen months after getting caught. Like all of Gantos’ writing, there is a fair bit of humor, mostly in the form of wry observations on events and people from his past. Remarkably, despite sailing up the coast of the United States with a less than competent captain and no boating experience, and despite spending over a year in jail and prison as a young, vulnerable boy, Gantos comes out the other end unscathed save for his criminal record. There are no harrowing escapes from death while at sea, there are no merciless beatings or rapes while in show more prison, and it all ends up with Gantos getting released early and diving straight into college and an apartment and a job. This is one lucky kid, which leaves me to wonder what the value of this book is. Don’t get me wrong, It is a fantastic read. The writing is brisk, entertaining, and approachable for anyone from 5th-12th grade, the pacing is perfect, and there is a decent amount of suspense. But, not to sound too much like a callous parole board member, Gantos neutral presentation of the events is by no means a cautionary tale. Its not quite an endorsement, but it sure did make me want to go on an adventure. While I would not agree, I can imagine some parents being alarmed by their students reading this book. Yes, he does get caught, but his time in prison, by pure luck, is far from the nightmare it could have been. I have no problem with this, but I could see issues coming up with parents. Does this book have enough to offer to make it a necessary text? I am not sure. His hardship was from his own doing, and so his redemption is more of a return to status quo than redemption. As an example of writing, it is a great text an would be useful in that context. The book could also be useful in a discussion of race and privilege. Would Gantos have received such a relatively light sentence if he had been black? Would he even have been allowed to turn himself in? Would they have chased his accomplice or shot him in the back? Good questions in today's grim world. show less

Equal parts bildungsroman, seafaring adventure, cautionary tale, and redemption story, Hole in My Life is the most mercurial book I've read in a long time. In this truly offbeat memoir, Jack Gantos, now a successful author of children's books, recounts a teenage vision quest gone horribly awry. Moving from place to place with his financially unstable family, struggling to finish high school, and aching for adventure, 19-year-old Gantos discovers the joys of hallucinogens. Hoping to make a quick buck, he foolishly agrees to smuggle a ton of hash from the Virgin Islands to New York. It does not go well.

From the start, we know that young Gantos winds up in prison, and this gives his story an unexpected poignance. Shrugging off the moral show more questions posed by his task and heedless of the consequences, Gantos sees the $10,000 payday as his ticket to college and a life of literary renown. We see a young man of intense yearning who models himself on Jack Kerouac and William Burroughs, who craves self-defining experiences NOW, and who sees every choice, every desire, and every encounter as an analogue to some groundbreaking novel that recently blew his mind—and fodder for the book he plans to, but can't quite, start writing.

It's an exhilarating ride. Gantos' distinctive voice blends two very different people: the freewheeling post-adolescent he was then and the more circumspect middle-aged man he's become. The tension between the two, and the paternal instinct the older Gantos feels for his younger counterpart, give the reader an intimate sense of "their" unique sensibilities and thought processes. There are certainly lessons to be learned from Gantos' story—such as how adversity gave him the focus to start writing in earnest—as well as horrific details like the brutal gang rape of his bunkmate in a New York detention house. But the intensity and momentum of the telling give it a no-regrets kind of sheen, and for this reason, I'm not sure what place it has in a high school classroom. I'd like to believe that students could see how very lucky Gantos was, but I worry some of the devil-may-care elements of the story will hold too much appeal for some high schoolers, who may see Gantos' romantic, amoral heedlessness as aspirational. I hope I'm wrong. show less

Jack’s desire to be a writer and to get money for college led him to take a desperate rust gat didn’t work out. For ten grand he agreed to crew a boat smuggling a ton of hashish from St. Croix to New York City. After weeks of sloppy and scared sailing he and the captain—the whole crew was the two of them—crashing into a New York marina. Two weeks later they had sold most of the dope when the Feds closed in on them, and Jack spent nineteen frightened months in a federal prison.

Gantos’s memoir is brilliant in its simplicity and brutal honesty.

Jack Gantos tells the story of his high school days, living in a cheap hotel, going to high school and working in Florida while his family moved to the Virgin Islands. Upon graduation he headed down to St. Croix to meet them and arrived in the midst of a Revolution. He ended up smuggling hash up to New York, where he was caught and served several years in federal prison. Throughout this time Gantos struggled to try to become a writer and it was only while he was in prison that he really learned what was important and why he was struggling so much as a writer.

This was a great read. Gantos' narration style is first person friendly. It feels like someone is telling you their story and it works well for the message he is trying to convey. show more The text is never preachy or didactic even though there are clearly lessons to be learned from the author's story.

Gantos also doesn't pull any punches. His story is very violent and terrifying at times and he could have glossed those things over but he didn't. He's honest about his mistakes and how long it really took him to figure things out.

However I don't want anyone thinking this book is all gloom and doom. It does have it's funny moments, both funny ha ha and funny awkward. All in all it feels like a well rounded book that is short (which many of the teens I know love) with a lot of great discussion points. show less

Jack Gantos tells the story of his high school days, living in a cheap hotel, going to high school and working in Florida while his family moved to the Virgin Islands. Upon graduation he headed down to St. Croix to meet them and arrived in the midst of a Revolution. He ended up smuggling hash up to New York, where he was caught and served several years in federal prison. Throughout this time Gantos struggled to try to become a writer and it was only while he was in prison that he really learned what was important and why he was struggling so much as a writer.

This was a great read. Gantos' narration style is first person friendly. It feels like someone is telling you their story and it works well for the message he is trying to convey. show more The text is never preachy or didactic even though there are clearly lessons to be learned from the author's story.

Gantos also doesn't pull any punches. His story is very violent and terrifying at times and he could have glossed those things over but he didn't. He's honest about his mistakes and how long it really took him to figure things out.

However I don't want anyone thinking this book is all gloom and doom. It does have it's funny moments, both funny ha ha and funny awkward. All in all it feels like a well rounded book that is short (which many of the teens I know love) with a lot of great discussion points. show less