Sarah Courtauld

"I'm a man of simple pleasures," he said. "All I ever wanted was a castle, my own pride of lions, a jeweled crown, a choir of elves singing me awake each morning, sainthood, the power to make gold, the best mustache in Europe, a Jacuzzi, an elephant from the indies, another one to be its friend, a singing giraffe, the power of invisibility, Magical Cheese Powers, a tiger with the feet of a lamb, the head of a lamb and the body of a lamb -- basically, a lamb -- power over the sea, power over

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the letter C..."

Dear Reader,
This is just a note to say, I cut the next 4,235 of Mordmont's simple pleasures, because really they weren't that necessary. Or simple. And because I like to save paper where I can.
Love,
Sidney the Tree

"...and a meringue that speaks Japanese," Mordmont said finally. "Is that really too much to ask?"

Moat dragons, interjections by Sidney the Tree, Prince Kanye the Anachronistic, musings of the life dreams and goals of a goat, knee-switching, the Black Death, and fairy tale obsession run amok combine to create a super fun children's book. Now THIS is a children's book that was actually written for children!

Sisters Eliza and Lavender live on the Old Tumbledown Farm in the Middle of Nowhere with Grandma Maud and Gertrude the goat. Eliza spends her time doing farm chores and dreaming of mystery-solving and swashbuckling adventures. Lavender spends her time getting out of farm chores, pining over princes, and practicing fainting. When Lavender disappears to find her prince and is kidnapped instead by Count Mordmont, Eliza and Gertrude set off to rescue her.

Another book that channels Roald Dahl, this fractured fairy tale is silly, hilarious fun, with so much nonsense, wordplay, gross disgustingness, asides, bad puns, and other goofiness kids will LOVE it, and probably fall out of their seats laughing. As I began reading it, I longed for the days when I had time to read aloud to the girls. Then one of my daughters (17 next month) asked me to help her curl her hair. I said I would, if while I did she took a look at this book, several chapters of which she then proceeded to read aloud to me because they were so funny. When I passed it along to my other daughter (14), she did the same thing. I can't WAIT to share this with my students.

The two sisters took two huge gulps of air, and then dived down into the stinking green water. And Lavender, her eyes shut tight, reached out below her, and touched something slimy. And Eliza, plunging downward, accidentally caught hold of the gnarled old leg...
...of a piano...
...tuner. show less

"I'm a man of simple pleasures," he said. "All I ever wanted was a castle, my own pride of lions, a jeweled crown, a choir of elves singing me awake each morning, sainthood, the power to make gold, the best mustache in Europe, a Jacuzzi, an elephant from the indies, another one to be its friend, a singing giraffe, the power of invisibility, Magical Cheese Powers, a tiger with the feet of a lamb, the head of a lamb and the body of a lamb -- basically, a lamb -- power over the sea, power over

show more

the letter C..."

Dear Reader,
This is just a note to say, I cut the next 4,235 of Mordmont's simple pleasures, because really they weren't that necessary. Or simple. And because I like to save paper where I can.
Love,
Sidney the Tree

"...and a meringue that speaks Japanese," Mordmont said finally. "Is that really too much to ask?"

Moat dragons, interjections by Sidney the Tree, Prince Kanye the Anachronistic, musings of the life dreams and goals of a goat, knee-switching, the Black Death, and fairy tale obsession run amok combine to create a super fun children's book. Now THIS is a children's book that was actually written for children!

Sisters Eliza and Lavender live on the Old Tumbledown Farm in the Middle of Nowhere with Grandma Maud and Gertrude the goat. Eliza spends her time doing farm chores and dreaming of mystery-solving and swashbuckling adventures. Lavender spends her time getting out of farm chores, pining over princes, and practicing fainting. When Lavender disappears to find her prince and is kidnapped instead by Count Mordmont, Eliza and Gertrude set off to rescue her.

Another book that channels Roald Dahl, this fractured fairy tale is silly, hilarious fun, with so much nonsense, wordplay, gross disgustingness, asides, bad puns, and other goofiness kids will LOVE it, and probably fall out of their seats laughing. As I began reading it, I longed for the days when I had time to read aloud to the girls. Then one of my daughters (17 next month) asked me to help her curl her hair. I said I would, if while I did she took a look at this book, several chapters of which she then proceeded to read aloud to me because they were so funny. When I passed it along to my other daughter (14), she did the same thing. I can't WAIT to share this with my students.

The two sisters took two huge gulps of air, and then dived down into the stinking green water. And Lavender, her eyes shut tight, reached out below her, and touched something slimy. And Eliza, plunging downward, accidentally caught hold of the gnarled old leg...
...of a piano...
...tuner. show less

A very simplified look at what it might be like to live on a pirate ship. I don't know, this one just felt weird to me. It completely glossed over and sanitized pirate life WHILE AT THE SAME TIME acknowledging that pirates search for "treasure ships," fight with them "until the battle is won," take their stuff, join the pirate crew or "be left to drift the swirling sea," and drink "hot, spicy drinks" and "dance until they're dizzy." Of course, "if the pirates get caught with the treasure, show more they'll be in deep, deep trouble." All of this is accompanied by cute, appealing illustrations of pirates with diverse skin colors and body types (and facial hair styles), except they are all men. Of course, the last page shows two children playing at pirates and asks if they'd be "brave enough" to live like a pirate. It just seems like a weird combination of truthfulness and cutesy. show less

This is the story of two very different sisters – Eliza, who longs to ride into battle against villains and dragons, and Lavender, who would give anything to be a pampered princess. Before the end of the story both of them have had a chance to fulfil their dreams, though not quite in the way they intended . . . Accompanied by their depressed goat, Gertrude, with their granny’s warnings about the Black Death ringing in their ears, they head out into the forest and come face to face with show more an evil count who definitely does not have their best interests at heart . show less