J. Simon (1)

***This book was reviewed for Readers' Favourite.***

Fossilised Gods by J Simon has got to be one of the funniest books I've read in quite a while! It's a unique brand of humour full of hidden wisdom and thought-provoking questions, such as- what happens when the worship of a god stops and how are new gods created?

This story follows a dormant deity known as ‘Samantha’, as she wakes and re-enters the human world. Along with her come three others, pulled along for the ride- Grock, Zaram, show more and Echo. They find themselves in a museum of sorts, part of a campus department known as Gods, housing the dormant remains of myriad sleeping deities, collected and curated by Professor Harrington, and his associate Eagleton.

Samantha and her companions take up residence in the hall's of the museum, learning about the modern human world and about themselves. There's another god waking though, a god more dangerous than any other. Time and again, Sam and her friends thwart this adversary, though the challenges increase.
Simon’s work can be taken as a humorous light-hearted read on one level. If you look deeper, though, you will find a rich bevy of philosophical questions just beneath the surface, as the novel takes a witty look at the nature of deity as human creations, how belief, or lack thereof, can strengthen or weaken ideas, how modern constructs can take on the force of deity, and how ancient beliefs can be reshaped by the priests of modern myth- fiction writers.

If you enjoy humour along the lines of Douglas Adams’ Hitchhiker series, you are sure to enjoy J Simon’s Fossilized Gods. Go check it out! show less

"All right, all right, you can stop chanting my name! ... If I got any more gigantic and golden, you'd burst into flames just beholding my divine beauty! Oh, all right, just a little more chanting - but take precautions, will you? Something fire-retardant. Spit on each other, maybe."


I had to start with a quote from this book, and could not, for the life of me, decide on which one. I think the above gives an adequate idea of the type of humor in the book. It is absurdist humor at it's show more best.


Because one quote just doesn't do this story much justice:

"What did orphans taste like, anyway? I mean, say what you will about witches, but anyone who builds a candy house - and doesn't immediately eat it - must be pretty certain it'll bring them something even tastier."


Sammy is a long dormant... god of sorts. She had worshippers and was well-known in her time, but after people stopped believing in her, Sammy went dormant for thousands of years. Fast-forward to present day, and some strange power has brought her back to life, along with three of her friends.

Overall, I loved this story. Every page was amusing to some degree, whether it brought me a pleasant smile or a hearty belly laugh. Because of this, deciding on a rating wasn't easy.

Four stars:
There are typos throughout the piece. Also, being the visual reader that I am, there were way too many times when I didn't know what to imagine. There were some scenes that were fuzzy or I had to force an image or I just moved on not knowing what was supposed to be there. Now, these things didn't leave me confused about the overall plot or characters, but it did make the reading just a little less enjoyable.

Five stars:
The fact that I couldn't put it down in the beginning, and the fact that I did just move on when something wasn't clear showed how enjoyable the overall novel was for me. Who cares if those few things were problematic for a moment if the overall journey was incredibly loved?

I finally went with four stars because, IMHO, the story did go on just a tad too long. I did find it lolling in the middle.


Once again, just because it's four stars doesn't mean this isn't a highly recommended book in my opinion! If the quotes fit your humor, please read this! You won't regret it!


Okay, okay... one more quote.

A character talking about the formula for writing romance.

"It's all arithmetic. Mister A, a lordly B from time period C, D-ly kisses humble lady E, a mere F, on the G, while firmly swatting her H with a leather I. You know. Romance." show less

Very Enjoyable. There were stretches where I just smiled at the Sammy antics and her distinctive lingo; and there were other times where I just laughed out loud. Sammy and her Scooby-Doo-like troop seem to exist in an alternate reality, thank God, as they encounter mystic no-nos where each crisis is worse than the last. I have to admit that I loved the true villain in this tale of inept gods, Old Mother Okembe, she's a sneaky old piece of work who is as mean as she is cunning, great job! Sit show more back, read and relax. This book is just plain old enjoyable. show less

I loved the crazy images, situations and characters. What an imagination Simon must have! The main god is wakened by starring in (trashy?) romance novels, so is innately superficial which mars the book a bit as I became a little bored of her. The rest of the book made up for that and kept me reading.
I received this as a LibraryThing Member GiveAway. Thank you.