Jamison Shea

A Fairytale for the Dark Souls

“What do you crave?”
“And what would you give for power?”

(Possible spoilers, read at your own risk)
Laure Mesny has ambition in her blood. It's not enough that she was trained by the Paris Ballet if she can't also join the company, not enough still if she can't be the star.
She will do whatever it takes; longer practices, broken nails, humiliation and thanklessly pouring everything she has into dance. She is perfect, but that isn't enough in a world show more of privilege, prejudice and nepotism. It's can never be enough, when acceptance is dependant on money and skin colour.
But none of that has to matter, because Laure is willing to do what it takes, give what it takes.
Even if what it takes is blood.
How lucky that she has finally found someone who will accept her sacrifice, and reward it. Someone, or something.
It doesn't matter. All that matters is that she has power.

Wow. I Feed Her to the Beast is one exhilarating ride, I honestly couldn't put it down. Laure Mesny is the flawed MC I have been dying to meet for a long time. I had high expectations for this book when I picked it up, and it met so many of them head on.
Firstly, can we talk about the setting? I have been obsessed with Paris since I was a small child reading Madeline books, on into my teenage years with Les Miserables and of course, The Phantom of the Opera. I was thrilled when I realised this story was going to take place in the Palais Garnier, and even more thrilled as I read the descriptions and story itself. The atmosphere of the story was a strong enough reference to Phantom, and I was glad that there weren't too many parallels other than the location and the feel of the story.
The Paris catacombs too have captured my imagination in the past, as they have come into various books and films over the years. What a wonderful setting for a book, this perfect gilded city sitting atop a rabbit-warren of tunnels and caverns literally filled with the dead. Paris is still one of my favourite places, so full of history both dark and beautiful.

When you think of the deal-with-the-devil trope, what comes to mind? For me the immediate thought is “be careful what you wish for”. It's monkey's paws, in-over-your-head, everything comes with a price. Of course, I mean those things are synonymous with devil deals, aren't they? Well, they no longer have to be. I was waiting for the tired old penny to drop, for the moment to come when Laure realises that she has given everything for nothing and now she is damned. But Jamison Shea saw me coming, and I want to hug them for that.
This is a different kind of story. It's not one where “Good must defeat Evil” because maybe, just maybe, people are more complex than that? It's a story that acknowledges that monsters come in all forms, and not everything that looks monstrous, or even is monstrous, is evil. Sometimes, the darkness doesn't need casting out, sometimes it just needs to be embraced.

I will always love a classic fairytale where the 'good people' live happily ever after and the 'baddies' get defeated, okay? But also, it is beyond refreshing to read a story for the flaws in us, for our fear ridden power-hungry selves. A story that acknowledges that we all have something vicious inside of us, and that's okay.
Laure isn't a protagonist, and she certainly isn't the villain. She is just herself- powerful, angry, and ready to be given the chance that she has rightfully earned, even if she has to take it by force. Although I don't relate to her particular level of ambition, I found that I loved her and felt a certain kinship for her. I think a lot of people will find themselves reflected in Laure, the ones who have inner darkness that isn't supposed to be acknowledged, who always hide their dark imagination from the people around them, afraid there is something wrong with them.

I know that another trope which is fairly tired at this point is that the 'true monsters' are society and expectations, etc, but honestly Shea does this so well that I can't even be mad. I was so angry at the attitudes and oversights of the ballet company, that it was somehow easy to feel that they were the true villains, rather than the more obvious ancient eldritch god.
How is that possible, how have I finished reading a book about a blood sacrifice to an ancient deity who manifests in the form of a river of blood, and come out feeling like, nope, Acheron isn't the villain. What? It makes no sense, in the best way possible.

I think the only other time I have read a story this backwards from usual in terms of how you feel towards the devil character (aside from absurd comedies like Good Omens) is Sylvia Townsend Warner's book Lolly Willows. Its a gentle classic with the bizarre and unexpected twist involving a somehow lovely little deal with the devil. I want to put these two books on the shelf next to each other. Two other stories which this one evokes are Addie LaRue and Black Swan (of course), and some films I've seen recently which also channel the obsessive devotion and intensity of the Paris Ballet are The Perfection, and Nocturne (Blumhouse). Both of these are music stories rather than dance, but the vibe is so similar.
When reading that opening line I also can't help thinking “Wouldst thou like to live deliciously?”.
If you know, you know.
Also, if you loved the claustrophobic creepiness of the Paris catacombs, I would like to recommend a film which takes place there - As Above So Below, thought it is not for the faint of heart.

I wouldn't recommend this book to everyone, but if you like the sound of it, you are going to love it. If you are ready to see the odd one out take back her own, if you are tired of darkness being synonymized with evil, if you are looking for an unapologetic and fierce main character, then this book is for you.

It was real privilege to read this book pre-publication, thank you to Reader's First. show less

Book:
I FEED HER TO THE BEAST AND THE BEAST IS ME by Jamison Shea
Thank you to the publisher and bookishfirst for the copy (paperback out Aug)

Review:
4.5⭐
I FEED HER TO THE BEAST AND THE BEAST IS ME is a thrilling novel that follows Laure, a ballerina. After a descent into the Paris catacombs, she makes a deal and becomes powerful. But things aren't as they seem, and when her friends start dying, she must fight the monster she didn't know that she knew.
Once I got through the first few show more chapters, which focused a lot on ballet---those chapters set the tone for the story so they were much needed---the book was undeniably great. It drew me in. Like I devoured this book. The horrifying idea of getting what one wishes for---power greater than anyone can control---was almost nail-biting, leaving me on the edge of my seat as I watched Laure's story unfold. As I saw the troubles that became of one's deepest desires.
If I had to describe I FEED HER TO THE BEAST AND THE BEAST IS ME, I would describe it as powerful I loved the descriptions that were used. I loved the nonstop drama, how secrets ate the characters alive. Jamison was able to paint a picture with they're words, and I can't wait for book two. show less

4.5/5
A dark story of acceptance, greed, and self-worth.

Author's Note: "Foremost, this book contains copious depictions of blood and features ritualistic self-harm (with the purpose of summoning a nonhuman entity). There are also descriptions of bones and corpses, body horror and an instance of body-shaming relating to ballet, non-graphic torture, and murder. Finally, there are references to classism and racism as well as parental neglect and abandonment that, while not graphically depicted, show more still permeate the work"
There is also some swearing.

Laure is a Black Ballerina who has sacrificed everything to become an apprentice of the Paris Ballerina Company. With her graduation so close, she will do anything to get the recognition she believes is hers. So when she is offered a deal with a dark primordial deity, she dives right in. With her new found power, Laure is pushing her limits and the limits of the ballet, all while her friends are turning up dead.

This one is dark and cruel. The racism dripping off every dancer. The cruel remarks like daggers are thrown by everyone, including Laure. Laure isn't a gentle and fluffy character, she's angry and fed up and ambitious. I loved watching her go through all of her feelings, dealing with the good, bad, and evil parts of herself and the world. I loved the friendships. I loved the bonds. I loved the breaking of everything.

Coralie omg. I didn't fully understand their friendship. There weren't enough sweet moments for me to truly believe they were best friends. Coralie needed more time to show how important their friendship is, I never got that so I was really annoyed with Laure when she kept putting up with it. I needed to feel more, I wanted to care more, but there wasn't a reason to.

Andor. My love. My heart. Poison perfection. Everything, yes. Read this book for him. I adore him.

The book seemed to be going one way and near the end it kind of derailed, but in the most unhinged and chaotic way possible, and I was okay with that. I loved the atmosphere, I loved the ballet. I could really picture everything and hear them speaking French and wandering the streets. It was really well done and I enjoyed the world thoroughly.

I recommend this book. Check your local library and bookstores! I am ready for the next book! show less

Any comparisons between this and, say, The Black Swan are wrong; as far as I'm aware, The Black Swan featured no mysterious blood rivers or deals with any maybe-a-chaos-god-or-perhaps-just-a-demon creatures. This got DARK, and generally whenever you find yourself actively rooting for one malevolent entity (is it evil to urge your deal partners to manipulate minds and become really aggressive when angry?) over another, it's a good sign that the story you're reading is pretty darn twisted. But show more compelling! show less