Alex Bollen

When my sister and I were pregnant with our first chilren, we both read multiple books on childcare. We both discovered that the different 'experts' did not agree. I found this to be very liberating. I could pick and choose what suited me and my baby from all these options. My suster found it terrifying. How was she to know which ideas were 'right'? Looking back, I feel that part of the difference is that livinb as an expat in Vienna, I did not feel onligated to accept every part of the show more local culture. Not only that, but living in an unternational community I had various models from around the world to condider.

I remember well after our first Sunday in church one of the older women coming up and saying how she had enjoyed hearing the baby breastfeed during the semon. The very metallic soung of the milk hitting the stomach brought back memories for her. And after that, just let antone dare to suggest that it was not suitable!

After reading this book I feel that I was very blessed in my experiences. The book is full of nightmarish stories of how women and babies both as individuals and as a group have been mistreated. The book centres on UK and US experiences, and I remember at the time being horrified at some of what my sister and mothers in general had to go through. Here women are paid to stay home from two months before the dur date until the baby's first birthday. With job protection. This makes for a very different experience.

The one thing I really missed in this book was for the author to vome out and say that babies are different. She continually says that mothers have different situations and that you can't have an 'optimal' way or raising babies. Of course not. I have three sons, and I had to learn different ways ofmothering for each one. It was quite a shock to learn that things that had worked with both older boys, different as they were, just did not work with the third one.

I was also constantly reminded of The Science of Racism. Both books make similar criticisms of invalid uses of studies that are made on animals, too small numbers, and just not proving what is claimed. I was particularly hit that there are more and better studies available for erectile disfunction than there are for PMS.

Apology. She spends one paragraph on the next to last page on the fact that children are different. show less