Hibernator the first

Ok, despite the fact that I'm on my iphone, I'm so excited about the new year that I'm going to start up my thread right here on the phone! I'll have to stop and save a few times, so be patient with me.

My name is Rachel and I'm a scientist who is interested in mental health. I'm bipolar and missed a good chunk of the last couple years on LT because of my mental illness. But with therapy and meds, I'm hoping this year I will be a new person. I'd like to thank all my dedicated supporters last year! You're awesome!

Along with mental illness, I'm also interested in social justice, science, philosophy, and mostly fantasy fiction. I don't know if I'll have time to read 75 books this year or not, so I'm going to have to include picture books, short stories, magazines, and even movies. So this is more of a media thread instead of just a book thread. So book snobs beware!

Media #1: Doctor Who: The Mind Robber (1968) 1/1/2015 (comments)
Media #2: Doctor Who: The Krotons (1968) 1/1/2015(comments)
Media #3 / Book #1 / Mt TBR #1: The New Testament Canon, by Harry Y. Gable(comments)
Media #4 / Book #2 / Mt TBR #2: Fire & Ash, by Jonathan Maberry(comments)
Media #5 / Mt TBR #3: Lesson 1 of The New Testament (The Great Courses, Course Number 656)(comments)
Media #6 / Book #3: The Coldest Girl in Coldtown, by Holly Black (comments)

I'm currently reading:



The Remarkable Miss Frankenstein, by Minda Webber is a book given to me by a DBT friend. Not really the type of book I'd have gone for next, but I thought I'd give it a try since it was a sweet gift.



The Meaning of Jesus: Two Visions, by Marcus Borg and N. T. Wright is a book I'm reading in my study of the historical Jesus.



Mr. Monk and Philosophy, by D. E. Wittkower just seemed like a fun book to read. :)



I'm listening to Far From the Tree, by Andrew Solomon. This is the 2014 winner of the Welcome Trust Book Prize which is awarded to a book that brings medicine into the lives of "popular" readers.

Welcome back!

Hi Rachel, I found you and . Happy reading in 2015.

Hi Rachel! Looks like you have some good books going. :)

Well, even though this is the first day of my thread, I'll give you a weekend update. :)

This week was a stressful one for me. I'm having difficulty with my job because I don't like it as much as I would like (I'm looking for a new one, but at least I have a job). My employees are quitting without giving any notice, others have the flu, and others are simply unreliable. I was feeling stressed and anxious all week. On top of that, my boyfriend Joel, a recovering alcoholic of 4 months had the first anxiety attack of his life. He'd probably had anxiety for quite a long time, but he's been drinking unhealthily for the past 30 years, and the anxiety feels different when you're drunk. It was a hard time because I had to explain to him that he wasn't going crazy, anxiety attacks happen, talk to your doctor, etc. On the other hand, it made him understand my problems a little better, so there's a silver lining to that cloud. :)

Christmas was mostly spent sleeping. I had a roast dinner with Joel's family on Christmas eve, with a night of cards. And I had ham sandwiches with my own family on Christmas day.

I'm also taking intensive outpatient therapy (3 hours 3 times a week) called Dialectic Behavioral Therapy (DBT) which is: "is a cognitive behavioral treatment that was originally developed to treat chronically suicidal individuals diagnosed with borderline personality disorder and it is now recognized as the gold standard psychological treatment for this population." The developer of DBT, Marsha Linehan wrote several books, if you're interested in checking her out.

I'm not borderline, but I have been struggling with suicidal thoughts for over a year now, and this therapy gives me mad skilz to keep the invasive thoughts at bay.

In DBT this week, we have been learning about mindfulness. Specifically how to be aware of whether we're in emotion mind, reason mind, or wise mind - which is a balance between reason mind and emotion mind. Here's a picture of the balanced continuum:



People would think it's a good thing to be in "reason mind" when making a decision - but according to DBT it's not. In fact, this fits well with data from the book Descartes' Error, which I hear gives evidence that thinking too "logically" can lead to poor decisions. (I have yet to read Descartes' Error, but I'm eager to and I own the book.)

We are also learning the "What" Skills - learning to observe, describe without judgement or assumption, and participate. Of course, just by observing you're participating, so I don't really get the whole participation skill. (Isn't that somehow related to the Heisenberg uncertainty principle? We can't observe without changing the event? Or am I going too far here?) Physicists???

Saturday I spent with my friend eeblue. Ate a nice dinner at Olive Garden, and then stopped by Barnes and Noble. I bought the book Rogue Knight, by Brandon Mull and The Brick Bible, by Bendan Powell Smith. It was a steal at only $10. It's only 2014, so these books don't count against my Mount TBR goal.



We watched a couple of story arcs from the 6th Season of Classic Doctor Who:



Tomorrow my plan is to lay low with Joel and to end the evening in my volunteer shift at a texting hotline for teens in crisis. That's every Sunday from 8pm-12am.

The books I'm currently reading are listed in comment >2 The_Hibernator:.

I hope everyone else's week went well, and have a happy New Year everyone!

I'm sorry to hear that you've had such a stressful week, Rachel. Please know that we're all in your corner, and I hope and pray that next week, and next year, is much better for you.

>3 drneutron: Thanks Jim! I'm always in awe of your ability to keep this group up and running! Thanks for all your hard work.

>4 Ameise1: Thanks Barbara! I'm always in awe of YOUR ability to find pictures to post on everyone's threads.

>5 bell7: Thanks for stopping by Mary!

>7 kidzdoc: Thanks Darryl! Everyone has bad weeks sometimes. I'm hoping the new year will make everything right again. I know it's all psychological that on the 1st of January I'll suddenly make a new start...but it feels that way anyway. :)

And here I am sitting at the text center. Luckily it's a quiet night. Only a few teens in crisis, and there are three of us here answering texts so I have some free time to surf LT. Hopefully I'll see all of your threads!

Rachel, I totally missed your thread last year. I only came back in the last couple of months myself. I hope this year is less stressful for you.

>9 jolerie: Hi Valerie! I don't think I saw your thread last year, either. But it's a new year, right? :) I'm glad you're back.

I hope things keep improving for you. on another note I did just borrow my first dr who dvd since i moved here. I am impressed at thier selection.

I lost touch with you last year. I'm so sorry to read about what's been going on, but I'm glad you have a good plan in place.

Dropping a star so I can follow along with your reading and life updates.

*Waves* I'm a thread stalker.... just dropping my star... 2014 was a difficult year for a lot... here's to that psychological new start right! It feels like you get a do over on the 1st to me... I'm hoping that this year will be better than the last 1 1/2 years for me... support, that is what we all need... and this group seems to be a good bunch... very supportive and encouraging! have fun with your reading and other entertaining media outlets!

Stopping by to drop a star.

It sounds like the DBT lessons are going well. Here's to a shiny new 2015!

Hi Rachel! I know what you mean about Jan 1 feeling like a new start. I'm a teacher, so I get that same feeling in August. Here's to a great 2015!

Hello and merry 2015, and happy book reading. Swinging by to leave a star :)

Hi Rachel. Not long now until that fresh new start :-) I'm leaving a star.

Hi Rachel! So glad to see that you have set up your thread for 2015! Starred!

>11 xymon81: Thanks Matthew! Glad to know you've got a good collection of Doctor Who to borrow! I'm currently watching the classic ones in order with my friend eeblue, and the two of us are watching the newer ones with my nephew. So much fun! :)

>12 DorsVenabili: Thanks Kerri! It's always so nice to have the support of my LT friends.

>13 lovelyluck: Hi Jennifer! I agree, this is a really supportive, fantastic group of people. I hope that you have a better New Year than last year as well. :)

>14 streamsong: Hi Janet! Thanks for stopping by. I can't seem to find your thread...I'll have to put it in my memory to find you once the New Year starts. *mumbles to self:must find Janet, must find Janet, must find Janet.

>15 porch_reader: Hi Amy! New starts are delicious. Wishing you a good New Year.

>16 evilmoose: Thanks for stopping by Megan!

>17 susanj67: And you too Susan!

>18 lkernagh: Hi Lori!

Update for today: More employee problems. Employees that don't show up over the weekend but say they're there. Employees that ask for time off on New Year's eve TODAY when they should have asked weeks ago, and then when I can't accommodate, tattle on me to my boss and threaten to quit.

On the other hand, DBT was fun today - it was socialization day, where we get to eat yummy food and play silly games - and Joel wanted a "Rachel vacation" today, so I get some free time to read and play on LT. YAY! Hope everyone else's day went well!

Hope that there won't be too much hibernation this year, Rachel, as the group is always enlivened by your presence. xx

So who is your fav Doctor? And what do you think of the current one? My vote is for david tennant.

Rachel, I am glad to plant a star on your thread once again. I hope the New Year is good to you. Thanks for educating us about DBT.

Wow, Rachel. I was really excited to hear about the DBT. I am sorry you are having issues though. I myself have Spinocerebellar Ataxia. Lol, up until 7 years ago I had a job I loved. However, when all the sudden you can't walk new construction interior designers can't work. Initially they told me there was nothing anyone could do. Well, they are treating me with adderall which works. Even though it's really used for ADD. This might work for me!

>21 xymon81: Tom Baker and Jon Pertwee still personify the role for me, Matthew. Liked Tennant and Troughton. Not so much the rest. The latest one I have yet to have the pleasure of watching.

Welcome back Rachel. Sorry you had work is so stressful at the moment but really interested to hear about your DBT. I did a mindfulness course in 2013 to help me manage my anxiety/stress and I did find it helpful.

Nice to see you emerging from hibernation!

Happy New Thread!

Hi Rachel - happy new year from me in New Zealand!

May all your wishes come true.

Dear Rachel



Happy New Year from your friend in Kuala Lumpur

Rachel, found you and dropped my star!
Even so that you had a stressful time, I am glad to see that you are so great at identifieng the reasons, which is obviously incredible helpful in getting back on track, even it it takes a little while at times. As you say, everyone has got from time to time a "downtime" and I think that's ok.
I am looking forward to your reading this year and I would love to have shared reads with you again!

A very Happy New Year, to you and your family!

Happy New Year, Rachel! Hoping that it is full of fabulous! Dropping off my star.

>20 PaulCranswick: Thanks Paul! I'm going to try not to hibernate this time around. I'm probably only going to give short reviews for books unless I feel particularly moved to write something about it. I think that will make the LibraryThing experience less intimidating if I get bogged down with RL again.

>21 xymon81: and >24 PaulCranswick: David Tennant is my favorite of the new ones, and John Pertwee of the classics - though John Pertwee is as far as I've gotten so far, and I haven't even finished an entire storyarc with him. Last night my friend and I JUST started Pertwee when the New Year rang in, and I had to go to bed. But we were really enjoying our first couple of episodes (in color even!).

One thing you need to know about me is I usually don't watch a lot of TV or movies - except with friends. Thus, I'm behind in practically everything - sadly, including Doctor Who. Plus, I'm a thorough in-order sort of person, and I started the classics with my friend around the same time I started the newer ones (Christopher Eccleston) with my friend and nephew. I'm only as far as Matt Smith. So, yes, from what I've seen of him I like Peter Capaldi, but I haven't been religiously watching the newest episodes. I know. Weird, right?

So far, the Daleks and the Weeping Angels tie for best enemy alien though. :) My nephew is totally afraid of the angels.

Definitely with you with David Tennant being the best of the new Doctors. Although I never watched the old ones so I can't comment there - I got scared when I watched them as a child so my parents wouldn't let me, and I don't want to watch them now because I get really distracted by poor set building and unrealistic aliens etc. Kind of like trying to watch the original Star Trek series, I just can't do it. I can only just make myself watch ST: TNG and that's because I did grow up on those.

It took me a long time to warm up to Matt Smith, although he's still only tolerable, not brilliant. I haven't liked Peter Capaldi at all, and haven't seen any of his episodes all the way through. He's left me feeling cold.

I'll happily watch David Tennant over and over though. And over and over. And again ;)

Hi there, Rachel! *Hugs* :)

>23 jaynep140: Hi! Thanks for reading about my DBT. When I put it in there I wasn't sure if anyone would be interested. It's nice to see interest in both of my threads (I'm over in the Category Challenge this year too - though my categories are pretty general as opposed to some of those creative themes others have. I thought about joining Club Read again this year, but I always feel like I read too much YA to really fit in there.). Speaking of threads, I can't find anything of yours! Do you have one?

Thanks for sharing about your own health-problems-leading-to-career-changes. Even though it's sad that such things happen, it's nice to be reminded that I have company out here. I hope the Adderall works for you. Keep us updated!

>25 souloftherose: Hi Heather! Yes, the mindfulness really does help. I'd always been a little skeptical of it, though my friends have sworn by it for years. But when Morphy mentioned that DBT worked really well for her, I decided I'd try it out - nothing to lose, whole lot to gain, right? I buy one of the Great Courses mindfulness lecture sets from Audible whenever I renew my subscription. (I cut myself off because I own too many unlistened to books.)

>26 qebo: through >35 Crazymamie: Thanks Katherine, Jenny, foggi, xymon, Cushla, Barbara, Paul, Jennifer, and Mamie!

>33 drachenbraut23: Hi Bianca! I'm always happy to see you around - you bring a lot of sunshine to this group. Hopefully we'll do a lot more chatting this year!

>37 lunacat: Hi Jenny! I agree that the poor sets and bad acting are difficult to get through sometimes. My friend and I rather enjoy laughing at it though. We WERE getting rather tired of the first doctor by the time we got through his shows. The first two doctors are also not as intelligent or politically correct as our current doctors, but I'm really liking what I see of the third doctor (which isn't much so far). Better acting, better sets, color, and even the plot seems surprisingly more modern. But if you can't watch the old Star Trek shows, then Classic Who is not for you. (ha!)

It took me a while to warm up to Smith, too. The reason we started watching Doctor who was because while my friend, nephew, and I were carving pumpkins last year a Who marathon was on TV and it was all David Tennant episodes. So Tennant is technically my "first doctor," which adds to his charm for me. When we went back to Matt Smith, it was fun, but not brilliant, as you say. Still some cheesy special effects with Matt Smith, too.

>38 Ape: Stephen! *Hugs, hugs, hugs*

Update: Well, I rang in the New Year with eeblue - watching some classic Who.



Like I said in >36 The_Hibernator: and >40 The_Hibernator:, we had just started the third doctor when the New Year rang in, but I'm really loving the contrast between the first two doctors and the third. Not that I didn't enjoy the first two - I loved the stories. And it's part of Doctor Who, after all, so how could I not love it? But it was time to move on to a new doctor.

I really enjoyed the storyline of The Mind Robbers, in which The Doctor, Zoe, and Jaime meet a bunch of fictional characters. I especially love the episode in which the actor who played Jaime was out sick and they had to replace him with another Scottish actor. "Jaime! What happened to your face?!" "Ach! This is not my face! Where's my face?" Classic. :) Then the next episode "Jaime! You've got your face back!" "Ach! So I have!"

I'm afraid I fell asleep a little bit through The Krotons, in which I gather some evil alien robot-esque machine had taken a bunch of poor humanoid aliens hostage.

Happy New Year, Rachel!

Happy New Year, Rachel!



>41 The_Hibernator: My niece was trying to get me to watch Dr. Who, but sadly, I don't do time travel. :-(

Wishing you all the best in 2015. I really appreciate how open you are on your thread. Looking forward to following your thread this year.

Hope you're enjoying The Coldest Girl in Coldtown. Going into the novel, I had quite low expectations and I was thinking it might be Twilight-esque. I ended up enjoying the premise quite a bit. Thankfully it was a lot less angst-ridden than it might have been!!

>44 literary.feline: thanks for the interest literary.feline. :)

So far, I'm pretty impressed with The Coldest Girl in Coldtown, but I'm only 30 pages in.

update: Amber's thread inspired me to state my New Year resolution: be happy. I'll try lots of ways to achieve happiness - prayer, acceptance, love, mindfulness, therapy, applying for new jobs, being the person I want to be, etc.

Right now, my first movement towards happiness is to say every day what I'm happy about. Even on bad days. Today I'm happy because I had half a day off work, got some reading done, did some LT thread hopping, and got some rest. I'm thankful for all my supporters here at LT, and that no one called in sick for work today.

>45 The_Hibernator: Here's hoping that your resolution comes naturally and easily to you every day, Rachel.

Hi Rachel, you are better on the iPhone than I am if you've set up your new thread on it! Impressive! Here's to wonderful reading adventures in 2015!

Happy new year, Rachel. I think your resolution is a great one. It's something I am always vowing to try.

Happy New Year, Rachel! I hope you have a great year of reading.

Happy New Year, Rachel. I hope this is a good year for you.

Love your resolutions to be happy and to comment on it. If I ever get a thread started for 2015, I may borrow the idea.

I'm also enjoying your adventures in DBT. It's a brush up for me since I did most of the skills in a DBT program and completed the course online. They are great skills and it's good to be reminded how well they work.

I haven't watched a lot of the old Who's, but I brought in the New Year with the 11th doctor and season 7.2. Netflix just made season 8 available, but never did make the second half of season 7 available on DVD - so I ordered them with my Amazon gift certificate (my brother would be proud!) and I'm watching them before going on to season 8.

Be well, be happy. Wishing you all the best in 2015!

I like your New Year's resolution, Rachel. And you are off to a great start - that's a very nice list of things that you are happy about! Hoping that your weekend is full of fabulous!

>46 scaifea: Thanks Amber! Actually, I felt much happier today than I have in a long time. Perhaps it's the psychological effect of my resolution. :)

>47 lit_chick: Hi Nancy! That took a lot of effort to set the thread up on my iphone. But I managed. So far, most of my LT activity this year has been from the iphone, actually.

>48 ronincats: >50 msf59: >51 BLBera: Thanks Roni, Mark, and Beth!

>49 susanj67: Thanks Susan, I know it's only the second day, but it's kind of fun to resolve to be happy. It made for a better day.

>52 streamsong: Hi Janet! Borrow away! It would be nice hearing about what made you happy each day. I'm glad you learned lots from your DBT too. I'll continue updating you as I learn more. The process of writing the notes helps me to learn, too. Glad I'm not the only one who brought in the New Year with Doctor Who. I'm in good company!

>53 Crazymamie: Thanks Mamie! Oooo! I just found your thread! I'm glad you decided to make one this year, I think I read on another thread that you were considering not doing it? I'll read through it this weekend. :)

What Rachel is Happy about in 2015 - Day 2

Today I had a pretty good day. Not because anything changed at work - it was all pretty much the same, but I had a better attitude today. I'm not sure how it came about, but it certainly was a welcome change. I'm also happy that I got to meet my friend Kari for coffee today - we sat and talked for a few hours. She's a friend I met in group therapy when I first got out of the hospital. You meet the best people in strange situations. (I also met my boyfriend, Joel, while I was in the hospital.)

I'm also happy it's the weekend!

Does anyone else have happy thoughts today?

>56 The_Hibernator: I am keeping a diary for the first time in years Rachel and I realised that we have so many things to be happy about every day and that the glorious can often be sought amongst the mundane.
Have a lovely weekend.

Hi Rachel, dropping my star for you.

Today I'm happy that my friend delivered clean laundry and helped me fill out a form. For "Angel," the TV series, and finishing my first book of the year. And, for LT and the many friends I have and the new ones I'm making.

Rachel, I'm happy that my elder daughter is coming to visit us for the next three days.

I'm super happy that the pink eye is gone! Ha!

>58 AuntieClio: Oooh, Angel! Love that show.

Rachel, I wish you a fabulous weekend.

Rachel, today I am happy that my filing is done, and that I had enough groceries so I didn't have to go out in the rain. I love looking at rain when the fridge has enough in it!

I hope your current reads are going well.

2015 Book #1 / Media #3 / Mt TBR #1: The New Testament Canon, by Harry Y. Gamble

Reason for reading: This is one of the supplementary books for the great course The New Testament (The Great Courses, Course Number 656), by Bart D. Ehrman.

Thoughts: This short "guide to biblical scholarship" glossed over some of the reasons certain books, and not others, were chosen for the New Testament canon. This is a very heavy topic with lots of scholarship, and this book tended to disagree with most of the specific theories in favor of the broader theory that there's no evidence that any specific movement had a great impact on the formation of the New Testament canon, but added all together they DID have an impact. I found this book rather dense at times. It assumed prior knowledge of the topic, which I'm only beginning to study.

Notes
Chapter 2: The History of the New Testament Canon

The history of the New Testament (NT) canon must be pieced together on fragmentary evidence. There are a couple types of evidence that are useful: 1) The contents of the ancient manuscripts of the NT together with scriptural aids like concordances or prologues. This evidence is mainly from the fourth and fifth centuries. 2) The use of early Christian documents written from the second through the fifth centuries. By noting early scholars' allusions to various texts, we can deduce which of these early texts were widely accepted.

The gospels which were incorporated into the NT did not gain clear prominence until the late second century. Mark, written around 65, appears to have been the first narrative gospel. But it originally ended at 16:8 and thus lacked any post-resurrection narrative of Jesus. John, too, was originally lacking sections that were later accepted as gospel - Chapter 21 was not composed by the same person that wrote the rest of the Gospel of John. Additionally, the story of the adulteress (John 7:53 - 8:11) wasn't originally part of the Gospel of John. These discrepancies might have cast doubt on the authoritative truth of these gospels. Furthermore, having too many gospels, especially ones that seem to contradict each other, cast doubt on the adequacy of any gospel.

The first evidence for a collection of four Gospels was in a document written by Irenaeus, bishop of Lyons in Gaul, writing around the year 180. There is also evidence of a four-gospel collection in the Muratorian canon list, which claims that the diversity of the gospels "matters nothing for the faith of believers." This comment suggests that some people had indeed found the discrepancies in the gospels disturbing.

The formation of a four-gospel collection was neither a necessity nor a natural outcome of the history of gospel literature in the early church. It is a compromise which balances an unmanageable number of gospels and a single self-sufficient gospel. Writers of the period tend to speak of the group of gospels as "gospel" (singular); thus, there are not four gospels but a fourfold gospel. Thus a balance is reached between two extremes.

There are several theories as to why Paul's letters gained the widespread appreciation that led to their placement in the canon.

One theory is that because his letters were highly valued by the communities he wrote to, they all sent his letters to neighboring communities so that everyone could share. But if this were the case, why did some letters survive and others disappear? And why did the author of Acts of the Apostles not mention the letters, if they were so important?

Another theory (Goodspeed's) is that Paul's letters were highly valued by one scholar, who went out of his way to collect as many of them as he could. He then wrote the letter to the Ephesians, in Paul's name, as an introduction to his collection. That would explain the difference in writing styles of that letter to the rest of them. Gamble suggests that this is an extremely romantic theory, but with no evidence to support it.

Another scholar (Schmithals) changed Goodspeed's theory a bit to say that the collector/editor of the letters did so to create a weapon against gnosticism, since many of Paul's letters contain comments that are in opposition to gnostic spirituality. Again, there's no evidence that this theory is true, and it's too complex to accept without evidence. (Occam's Razor and all that jazz.)

Schenke suggested that the letters were collected by a Pauline school of scholars that valued Paul's teaching. This theory seems to be the most attractive to our author Gamble.

Chapter 3: Factors in the Formation of the Canon

In the early years of Christianity, there were several Christian movements. Many theologians suggest that the New Testament was developed specifically to refute the claims of one or more of these movements. Gamble lists a few of them, and provides the arguments for and against particular groups having strong influence on the formation of the NT. Although Gamble does not support beliefs that any of these groups had much influence on the NT formation, he does suggest that all of them together could have had a larger effect on the NT.

The Marcionite Christians (second century) - movement begun by Marcion, a shipowner-turned-scholar who arrived in Rome in about the year 140. Marcionites Believed that there was an angry Jewish Creator God and a good God that Jesus came to save us from. Since Jesus was not created by the Creator God, he did not have a corporal body - he only appeared to. Thus, Jesus was not human, but he was divine. (This would sorely undervalue Jesus' gift of dying for our sins if he only appeared to suffer.) Because Judaism had nothing to do with Christianity (different Gods) the Jewish scriptures had no place in the Church.

Marcion was the potentially the first scholar to compile a canon of literature - composed of the letters of Paul and Gospel of Luke. Some theologians believe that the Church adopted Paul's letters into their canon because of pressures from Marcionites, and that it was compelled to compensate for Marcion's bias towards Paul by including a variety of other apostolic writings to the canon. However, this theory does not explain why Paul's letters were widely known before Marcion's time.

The Gnostic Christians - Believed that the real truth was only revealed to a select few. That when Jesus was baptized, a spirit entered him and he became the savior who taught the way to salvation. This spirit left Jesus and returned to heaven when Jesus was dying on the cross. We, also, are spiritual in nature, stuck in corporal bodies. (This doesn't fit exactly with the way Elaine Pagels described Gnostics in the two books of hers that I've read, but I guess there's room for error in studying a group of people on which so little information is available.)

It is commonly supposed that the NT was developed as an effort to oppose The privacy of many Gnostic beliefs, which were only abailable to the select few, and to oppose the "heretical" literature circulated by the Gnostics. However, Gnostics made free use of canonical literature, too, and it seems that the major difference between Gnotics and the Church was more about interpretation than literature.

Montanism - The Montanists were followers of a charismatic prophet named Montanus who claimed that the Paraclete promised by Jesus in the Gospel of John had come, and the end of times were at hand. (Seems like the end of times was always at hand for millennia on end.) Many theologians suggest that the New Testament was formed as a retaliation against Montanism for two reasons. First, the Montanists created new prophetic documents and claimed authoritative truth that the Church wanted to refute. Second, Montanists claimed prophetic revelation and the Church claimed that all prophetic revelations were in times past - that Jesus was the last prophet. However, as with the Marcionites and the Gnostics, Gamble refutes claim that Montanism had much impact on creation of the NT. First of all, Montanists, like the Gnostics, made free use of the canonical literature, but had different interpretations. Second, at the time that Montanism was popular the Holy Spirit and prophetic charisma were accepted by even the anti-Montanists in the Church.

In addition to the groups above, these Early Christian groups were outlined in Chapter 1 of Bart D. Ehrman's The New Testament: A Historical Introduction to the Early Christian Writings. I thought it would fit in well with these notes on Gamble's book.

The Jewish Christian Adoptionists - Believed that Jesus was born a human of a non-virgin. He was adopted by God as His son upon baptism. Jesus was not, however, divine. (I could believe this pretty easily if I were inclined to have fixed beliefs.)

Proto-Orthodox Christians - These are the ones that modern Christianity sprouted from. They believed that Jesus was divine and human. They believed there was only one God.

Another factor possibly affecting the formation of the New Testament is that the technology to create a codex large enough to hold the entire NT was not developed until the fourth century.

NEWLY ADDED TO "CURRENTLY READING:"



I'm reading chapter 1 of An Introduction to the New Testament, by Raymond E Brown for the great course The New Testament (The Great Courses, Course Number 656), by Bart D. Ehrman.

Here I am in my perpetual too far behind to catch up mode. Happy New Year, Rachel! I look forward to your continuing presence this year. Your latest books remind me that I have a f2f group that is reading The Meaning of Jesus for February, a sort of collaboration between a more traditional scholar (N.T. Wright) and a more contemporary one (Marcus Borg). I can't seem to find my copy, and I need to make a concerted effort since I was the one who suggested the book in the first place.
Hope the great course is a good one!

Hi Rachel! Starred and interested in all the things you've been writing about so far this year.

Today I am happy that the errands are done, husband and daughter are enjoying watching football and that I can putter around til I want to join them to watch the Panthers game. In jammies. Total indulgence.

I love your resolution too! Also, glad to see two good days in a row.

I'm happy for a marginally relaxing weekend, so there's that.

>57 PaulCranswick: Hi Paul! Journaling IS a really good way to reflect upon what is good in life - as long as you make that a purpose in your writing. Personally, I write letters to my cousin once a week, and those are kind of like my journal. It's fun looking back at them.

>58 AuntieClio: Hi Stephanie! All good things to be thankful of. Thanks for sharing. I've never seen Angel, because I don't watch a lot of TV. Mostly just Doctor Who at the moment. Maybe someday I'll check it out, though. And I agree about the LT friends. They are definitely something to be happy about.

>59 Ameise1: Hi Barbara! It's always nice to get a visit like that. I'm glad for you. I hope it's a lot of fun. :)

>60 scaifea: Hi Amber! Now there's something worthy of a happy dance!

>61 Ameise1: Thanks Barbara!

>62 susanj67: Hi Susan! Haha. You know, I love rain as long as I don't have to go out and get cold, as well. I love getting wet when it's a nice warm rain.

>65 LizzieD: Hi Lizzie! I've started The Meaning of Jesus - read the first couple of essays. It's really good so far. I hope you enjoy it as much as I am.

>66 karenmarie: Thanks Karen! Having your family entertained, leaving you free to do what you want sounds delicious.

>67 DorsVenabili: Hi Kerri! Relaxing weekends are a huge necessity sometimes. I hope it was more than marginal in the long run.

Today I got a text from one of my employees at 7:30 (exactly when her shift was supposed to begin) telling me that she didn't have a ride to work. Now, if she doesn't work, that means I have to work her shift for her. So this is the third time that I've spent an hour of my life picking her up and taking her to work. Yes, I know I'm being used. But I had been planning on giving her an employee warning notice today because she no-call no-showed the last two weekends. So this incident was a lovely segue into giving her the notice. Which made the whole messy business a little easier for me.

Rachel's reason to be happy - Day 3

Today I am happy for segues. :) And for audiobooks. And for weekends off (which will hopefully continue into tomorrow, as well.)

I'm sorry that you have to deal with an employee who clearly isn't performing as she should, but yay for finding the bright side of the situation! Go, Rachel!

I love your listing of reasons to be happy, Rachel! I am sure you will find many more as the year goes on.

I am happy for board games. They have given me an intellectual outlet apart from reading and schoolwork, a reason to spend more time with my husband and daughter, and allowed my daughter and I to get closer as we socialize over the games we play.

Happy for segues! I love it.

I am happy knowing that sometime today I will get my Websites/Passwords spreadsheet updated. I have so many and since everything's unique, it needs updating. (I code the passwords so nobody could just find the list and go to a website and log on as me.)

Happy Sunday, Rachel! I hope you have an R & R day planned. I also hope you are bracing yourself for the arctic blast, that is fast-approaching.

How is the Holly Black? I've never read her but have heard good things.

>69 The_Hibernator: Errrr..... that can be very irritating... Friday I had a co-worker that was supposed to be in at 1:15 and then I was going to lunch... didn't come in until 2:15 and then had to be on her own while I took lunch... it is what it is sometimes... hope things look better at work for you

Co-workers

Another one for you ....

Smile

Best wishes for your 2015 resolution. Have you already read Gretchen Rubin's The Happiness Project? I just started it - always a few years late getting to bestsellers.

Rachel, I love the Happy Theme going on here. I'm a firm believer that one can find at least a few small things to be happy about even on the dark days. Today the sun came out for the first time this year. I am ECSTATIC to see it, even though it is cold out there. The weather definitely affects my mood in the winter. It's a good thing that I have a dog that likes to be walked or I could be a true hermit! Your first book of the year was a deep one. That sounds like a course I would like to take. I'm bummed because my church quit doing the studies that I enjoyed so much. It seemed like the same people were taking them all the time…people like me!

>70 scaifea: Thanks Amber!

>71 alcottacre: Hi Stasia! I think listing reasons to be happy will get easier with time. It really does seem to work at some level. I'm happy about board games too! I spend a lot of time playing games with Joel (my bf).

>72 karenmarie: Hi Karen! Hope your plan to get your passwords updated came to fruition! :)

>73 msf59: Thanks Mark! Arctic blast has hit, but luckily I have one of those awesome earflap hats and warm gloves, scarf, and a HUGE coat. I'm all ready.

So far I'm really enjoying The Coldest Girl in Coldtown. I'm about a third of the way in, and it's certainly caught my attention. And so far none of that angsty stuff that comes with teen literature. Hopefully I'll have time to write a full review of it when I'm done reading.

>74 lovelyluck: Ha, Jennifer! Those cartoons made my day. Coworkers can be a bit of a pain, can't they? But it's good to laugh about it.

>76 Megi53: Hi Megi! No I haven't, but it sounds like a really good idea for my reading list this year. I should read books about happiness, since that's my goal. :) Another book I'd been thinking about trying is The How of Happiness. I'll put those on my potential list of reads this year.

>77 Donna828: Hi Donna! Yes, I'm liking this happiness theme too. It's nice to have something to be happy about every day, and it's even nicer to hear what's making everyone else happy. That makes me happy in itself. And we had sunlight today, too, though we generally do on polar vortex days. Clouds keep the heat in. Still, it was nice to see the sunlight, even if I could only appreciate it through the window. :) The sky today was beautiful.

Rachel's reason to be happy day 4

Today I'm happy that I got to see my boyfriend Joel. We played some cribbage and Carcassonne, and did a lot of talking. For another uneventful day in which no one called in sick at work. And for all my co-volunteers here at the crisis hotline - because everyone needs someone to talk to. I also thought the sky was quite pretty today, even if it was because of the polar vortex.

ETA: I'm also happy about all the people who have shared their reasons to be happy. That makes my thread a happier place! AND because my friend DJ got a request for his book's manuscript by an agent, which is the first big step after finishing the book. Good job DJ - though I know you're not reading this.

Hi Rachel. I finally made it over here to wish you a Happy New Year!



I'm keeping it brief, because I have so many threads to catch up on. I've been feeling happy these past couple of days, though I can't define why. Maybe it's because both my kids are at home for their holidays (last year their seperate school holidays only overlapped for 2 weeks in December and 2 weeks in June, so we were busy doing family stuff), even though they're doing their own thing in different parts of the house. Or maybe it's just a fresh start for the new year, though I don't usually feel that way about it. Doesn't matter why; I like feeling happy :0)

What a wonderful way to look at each day Rachel. Your courage and determination is inspiring, Rachel. Cheering you on from the sidelines!

Today I'm doubly happy and grateful for a warm house and a roof over my head because it is FRIGID outside!!! I'm going to have to bundle in layers just to shovel our driveway. :)

>80 humouress: Hi Nina! Happy for no reason is still happy. And in some ways, that's the best sort of happiness because it just comes naturally. I'm glad you have that feeling.

>81 jolerie: Thanks Valerie! It most certainly IS cold outside! Luckily, we didn't get any snow out here - or at least not enough to shovel.

Rachel's Reasons for Happiness Day 5

Today I'm happy that nothing disastrous or untoward happened at work. And that I have so many good, supportive friends.

Have to chime in here as well. Wonderful to read your reasons for being happy, Rachel. Very inspiring.

I bought a book last year by Mike Mason called Champagne for the Soul: Celebrating God's Gift of Joy. He actually set out in "a ninety-day experiment of joy" where he would set his mind each day to be joyful in the Lord - well, the idea was that a persistent focus on reasons to be happy would actually make him happy :)

>84 ctpress: Hi Carsten! Thanks for the suggestion. Mindful happiness - making yourself happy by thinking about happiness apparently does work, according to everything I've read on the subject. Hopefully it will work for me!

Rachel's reasons for happiness: day 6

Today I'm happy for my dedication to this cause - I'm typing from my cell phone. I'm happy that I was busy all day, and that my business paid off. I'm happy for junk food and audiobooks.

Mindful happiness is a great concept. What an inspiring thread!
Typing from the cellphone is sth I haven't mastered yet. It's difficult enough on my ipad mini. :)

Rachel, when you mentioned how cold it was where you were, I looked at your profile and I see you're in Minnesota! I am a great fan of Joanne Fluke's Hannah Swensen mystery series which is set in Minnesota, usually in the winter, and I constantly marvel at "winter life" for the characters, which includes plugging in their cars so the oil doesn't freeze, and the Hannah character once putting some cans of Diet Coke in the fridge when her heating went out at home, so they wouldn't *freeze*!! I've always lived in more temperate climates (Auckland in New Zealand and now in London, where we pretend it's cold and people from really cold places laugh at us) so life in the truly cold fascinates me. And I envy the coats.

Yesterday I was happy because I finally got my hair cut, and I no longer have to twist it up and tuck in the raggedy ends. There is a hairdressing salon *in my office building* so I really have no excuse.

>87 Deern: Thanks Nathalie! I'm glad others are enjoying my happiness theme, too. :)

>88 susanj67: Hi Susan! Yes, there are some strange things we Minnesotans have to do to stay warm, though addmittedly I've never had to put my Diet Coke in the fridge to keep it from freezing. But last New Year my friend and I put a bottle of wine outside to chill it for about 30 minutes and it totally froze solid. hahaha Glad you got your hair cut! :)

2015 Book #2 / Media #4 / Mt TBR #2: Fire & Ash, by Jonathan Maberry

Reason for reading: This is the fourth and final book in a series that I've been reading. I'm making a goal this year to get farther in / finish as many series as possible

Summary: In this fourth and final book in the Rot & Ruin series, Benny, Chong, Lila, and Nix battle the genocidal Reapers while keeping the zombies at bay. But they might have to become monsters to fight monsters. And who is more of a monster: The zombies or the humans?

Thoughts: This book was filled with action and adventure with a dash of intrigue. Like most Maberry books that I've read, the action got a little too much at times, to the point of feeling a little B-rate. But Maberry has some interesting plots and his philosophy about who really is the monster is quite interesting. Overall, a good finale. If you liked the first three books, you'll like this one as well.

NEWLY ADDED TO "CURRENTLY READING:"



I'm listening to Far from the Tree: Parents Children and the Search for Identity, by Andrew Solomon. This is the 2014 winner of the Welcome Trust Book Prize which is awarded to a book that brings medicine into the lives of "popular" readers.

>91 The_Hibernator: Far from the Tree
I keep seeing this book, at the grocery store oddly. Will be interested in your review.

Being from Southern California I was totally charmed one year when I visited my grandma in Cedar Rapids Iowa in the winter. She had me set a bowl of something on the porch to chill it. Not something you'd do in SoCal, for sure. Now, living in central NC where tonight it's supposed to get to 12F (pretty cold for NC!) I'm bundled up in flannel jammies and sox and debating on making hot chocolate.

But I'm sure Minnesota is MUCH colder.....

I am also enjoying your Happiness Theme, Rachel, especially in the midst of the current arctic blast, we are laboring under.

>92 qebo: I'm liking it a lot so far, Katherine...I expect it will be a very positive review. It's also a really long book, so it might take me a while to finish.

>93 karenmarie: Hi Karen! Mmmmm, hot chocolate sounds really good right about now. Right now it is -2F in Minneapolis and it will be a low of -11 tomorrow. That doesn't count windchill...which I hear was around -35 this morning...I don't really know what wind chill means (i.e. how they calculate it), so I generally ignore it. It's just "-2F and windy" is all I need to know.

>94 msf59: Thanks Mark! Yes, it's good if we can stay happy while enduring the Polar Vortex.

Rachel's reasons for happiness: day 7

Today I'm happy for to-do lists, which make a day go a lot faster and more efficiently. I'm happy that my house has heat and that my cats are nice and cuddly and warm. I'm happy that it's still early, and I can sit in bed with the space heater on reading a nice book before I go to bed. :)

What is everyone happy about today?

I have Far from the Tree on my Kindle, so I look forward to your comments about it.

I'm happy that I was able to spend a few days with my parents, who are 79 (Mom) and 80 (Dad) years of age. They are still living independently, but my mother is becoming more forgetful and less mobile, so any amount of time I share with them is precious.

Far from the Tree looks interesting. I will have to see if my local library has a copy.

I am happy that I have Internet. I could not go to school and (hopefully) finally get my college degree. I could not learn about books here on LT, I could not learn about games like I do on BGG. I love the Internet!

Oooh, I'm happy for To Do lists, too! Any kind of lists, really. I love lists!

>95 The_Hibernator: A native Minnesotan who doesn't know what windchill is? For shame! Windchill is our way of proving we are tougher than the rest of the country (except perhaps those weirdos in North Dakota).

Windchill is supposed to represent the increased rate of the loss of body heat from convection. So, when you are outdoors on a -10 day your body temperature does not drop to -10 (if it did you would die). However you do feel cold as your body temperature will decrease due to heat loss. The rate of heat loss depends on the difference in temperature between the body and the surrounding air. Windchill comes into play as the wind increases because it speeds up the rate of heat loss. You get cold faster because of windchill. Windchill can not bring an object to below the air temperature, it just increase the rate at which things (and people) cool. For us, this means that you are a lot more likely to get frostbite because the greater the wind the quicker you lose body heat and thus run the risk of harm.

There remains disagreement about how exactly windchill should be calculated. They changed the calculations in 2001. The newer calculations put (relatively) warmer values on the windchills. I don't know if you grew up in Minnesota but I remember weather reports showing -60 and -70 windchills on very cold days in the 80's. Today, those same temperature and wind values would result in windchill numbers in the -40s.

> very good description. Being from Chicago, I know what that is too. I think that is one thing I like about being up here in Alaska where I am at. There really isn't any wind and it really is a differant feeling of cold. Being from Chicago I was expecting worse. There are times I go out in shorts to go to the gym.

>97 kidzdoc: I agree Darryl, time with your parents is precious, and I'm glad you're enjoying it. Too many people don't realize how precious time is!

Far from the Tree is still really interesting. Its thesis is that everyone has horizontal and vertical identities, and that most parents cringe at horizontal identities because they are "different." Examples of vertical identity are race, religion, nationality...anything that is generally passed from parent to child. Horizontal identities are those in which the child relates to other people but not to their parents, like people who belong to the gay, deaf, little people, autistic, and developmentally disabled communities. This is not generally passed from parent to child, and the parents often have a hard time seeing their children branch out into a community to which they can not readily relate.

The book is good so far, though I'm starting to see a pattern that the people he interviews for the book tend (most of the time) to be either intellectually or financially privileged. I get that he's interviewing people who got the ball rolling on important community-forming organizations, and that's an important part of the history of each "horizontal identity," but it limits the data to people who handled their children's disabilities abnormally well.

I would also have been interested in learning the history of the horizontal identity of alcoholics and people with mental illness, because these are disabilities that are often scorned in our society. But those subjects might be a little more difficult to handle from a parent-child relationship perspective, so I understand why he hasn't included them. He DID mention that AA was pretty much the first organization for "horizontal identity," but that's about as far as he's gone so far with alcoholics. I'm wondering if alcoholism and mental illness is still too taboo a subject for him to dwell on in a book like this? Would the gay, deaf, little, autistic, and down syndrome people be insulted being compared to an alcoholic or a suicide survivor? Because many people believe that alcoholics and suicide survivors have made their own proverbial beds. They fail to realize that an alcoholic has a disease that they have little control over, and that a suicide survivor can not have been in a "sane" state of mind to have attempted suicide, and nobody chooses to be that mentally ill.

>98 alcottacre: Yes, Stasia, I can't imagine a world without the internet. Well, I don't have internet at work (no computer!) so I sort of can imagine. Yes, I am very happy for the internet. See my comments to Darryl for my current thoughts about Far from the Tree.

>99 scaifea: I love lists too, Amber!

>100 Oberon: Hi Erik! Thanks for that description of windchill. I knew some of that, but not all, and it clarified the subject a bit for me. My dad (from California) always scorned windchill and said it was meaningless, and I think I was influenced by him. It IS sort of fun saying "it was -40 out today" than "it was -2." And I didn't get a chance to see what the windchill was last night, but hot d--n was it ablowin' out there!

>101 xymon81: That's interesting that Alaska isn't windy. Is it because of mountains? Where in Alaska are you? A more temperate area?

Much to my dismay, I awoke this morning to realize I'd forgotten to post my reasons for happiness. I DID think about my reasons, though, so I'll post yesterday's today.

Rachel's Reasons for happiness day 8

I'm really happy that I'm not outside right now because...wow...that wind! Combined with below zero temps! Thank goodness I was only out in it for a few seconds.

Rachel's reasons for happiness day 9

I'm happy that I was able to get out of bed this morning - rather proud of myself, really. Because that cold wind last night made me want to stay cuddled in forevermore. I'm also happy that once the day got up and running, it was uneventful and reasonably busy (not crazy busy). It made the work go faster. I'm happy the weekend approaches. And that I can sit and read my book tonight Mr Monk and Philosophy.

>102 The_Hibernator: horizontal identity of alcoholics and people with mental illness
The author became known (or I became aware of him) for his book about depression (including his own): The Noonday Demon. I haven't read it, but I listened to an interview when he was in book tour mode some years back. I don't know whether he addresses horizontal identity, but I'd bet something of the sort is in there somewhere.

Thanks Katherine! I'll check it out!

Far from the Tree is on my radar, because a friend really liked it. I will be interested to hear your impressions.

And happy weekend!

I'm happy because I had a good day at work, because it's Friday, and because my dog is curled up on the couch beside me.

I like that you are posting your happy thoughts, so I thought I'd share mine.

I'm happy reading your thread! And I'm happy that it was warmer than predicted today, and that I got to hang out at home with my dog on my afternoon off.

I'm just happy it's finally the weekend. Let the partying book reading begin! :)

>63 The_Hibernator: I find all of this endlessly fascinating. I've read several Ehrman books, including his latest How Jesus Became God (review to come) Have you read any by Karen Armstrong?

I'm happy to have started PT for my wrist today.

Rachel, I glad that you have such a lot of happiness. I wish you a most wonderful weekend.

I'm happy that I've gotten two things from my Saturday To Do list accomplished, and it's only mid-morning. I'm also happy that it's the weekend and absolutely gorgeous out, if a bit cool (28F - I'll concede that it's not cold compared to -35F!).

Far from the Tree: Parents Children and the Search for Identity looks to be one for the wishlist. I don't know if I was aware of that award, but I'll check it out from now on.

>63 The_Hibernator:, >64 The_Hibernator: I actually read Ehrman's book on this topic, The New Testament: A Historical Introduction to the Early Christian Writings, and it is fascinating. I have 5 of Ehrman's books--he's an engaging writer. The other book I've read specifically on this topic is When Jesus Became God: The Struggle to Define Christianity during the Last Days of Rome by Richard E. Rubenstein, although I've read a LOT on early Church history. How do you like the course?

>106 banjo123: Happy weekend to you too, Rhonda! As I said, I'm enjoying Far from the Tree so far! I'll certainly write a serious review since everyone's so interested.

>107 foggidawn: Hi Foggi! I'm so glad whenever people share their happy thoughts on my thread, so thank you! :) I love cuddly pets, too, though mine are cats.

>108 cbl_tn: Thanks Carrie, that's sweet. I wish it were "warmer here!"

>109 jolerie: Totally Valerie!

>110 AuntieClio: Hi Stephanie. I haven't read How Jesus became God, though I want to. I'll be watching for the review (haven't checked everyone's threads yet this week). Hoping to do it nowish, but the text center is really busy with teens in crisis. 'Tis the season. I have several of Karen Armstrong's books, but the only one I've read so far is The Case for God. Do you suggest one to read next?

>111 AuntieClio: Yay for PT!

>112 Ameise1: Thanks Barbara! Happy weekend to you, too!

>113 karenmarie: Wow! Here's to wishing it was 28F here! :) And good job on your to-do list. Mine has been slacking away this weekend.

>114 DorsVenabili: Hi Kerri! Yeah, it's an interesting award, and I'm trying to read them all because there isn't enough history to make that a really long list. :)

>115 ronincats: Hi Roni! The New Testament: A Historical Introduction to the Early Christian Writings is the formal textbook for Erhman's course, so I'm slowly working my way through it. I think When Jesus Became God is also one of the books on my to-read list, but I'll have to double check. So far, I've only listened to the first lecture of the course, so I can't really say how I'm enjoying it. I'll give reviews of each lesson as I go. :)

Rachel's reason for happiness day 10

Today I got to spend time with my best friend Liz (eeblue). Liz, my nephew and I watched several episodes of Doctor Who the fifth season (Matt Smith). That was quite a delight. :)

Rachel's reason for happiness day 11

Today I'm happy that everyone is sharing their reasons to be happy. :) And I'm happy for all my fellow volunteers and staff members here at the crisis text center - what wonderful people. And I got to spend time with my boyfriend, Joel. We played Carcassonne, cribbage, and a couple hands of canasta. I almost always lose at cribbage, which means I don't like that game very much - though it's Joel's favorite. But I whoop Joel's boody at canasta, which means he doesn't enjoy it very much. I love playing canasta because it reminds him what I feel like whenever we play cribbage. :p

Weekly update

What I acquired (free Friday nook book):



I finished one book Fire & Ash, by Jonathan Maberry >90 The_Hibernator:.

This week in DBT:

We covered Non-Judgmental Stance (NJS), One Mindfulness (OM), and Effective (EFF)

NJS: The point here is to be as non-judgmental as you can. This doesn't just include the obvious stuff like judging people for the race, gender, or values, but subtler things like the little assumptions you make in life.

For instance, I told my boss that I had a disability (bipolar with suicidal ideation) last week because I was starting to feel really, really bad again. (If I had been in my right mind, I probably wouldn't have, but I was desperate at that moment, and it DID help. And he responded quite favorably.) However, when I saw my boss's boss the other day, he wasn't making eye contact with me. I immediately assumed it was because Ryan, my boss, had told Jim, his boss, that I was mentally ill.

But then I realized NJS. I need to stop assuming that I know why Jim is acting the way he's acting. Yes, it's likely to be exactly what I think it is. But there's no point in assuming. And there's no point in feeling self-conscious about it myself (i.e. there's no point in judging myself, either).

And that brings me to another point. You're not only not supposed to judge other people, you're supposed to stop judging yourself. Don't even judge yourself for judging. (Which is the bane of my judgmental existence - I feel like a hypocrite because I'm so judgmental of judgmental people. Anybody else have that problem?)

Being judgmental creates negative emotion and keeps you out of the present moment, because you're using assumptions/categorizations/data from the past to judge. Having a NJS can free you from the negative emotions that you associate with certain assumptions.

OM: This one I'm not quite a master of yet. Apparently, we're supposed to break each task into "molecules" or "units." For instance, thinking of what to write, typing each letter, and then reading it as I'm typing (which I'm told I'm not supposed to do if I want to be a "good" typist) are each one unit. I'm supposed to separate these and be conscious of each. I'm not supposed to do anything extra. Apparently, this will either distract me from my pain or keep me from getting distracted from what I'm doing. I'm not sure which.

EFF:Being effective means that you need to be aware of the rules (even if you don't agree with them) and follow those rules to get the task done as well as you can. That is, IF the task needs to be done and you are not sacrificing your own personal values or safety to follow those rules.

HI Rachel. I love your daily theme of reasons for being happy. Such a pleasure to read and shows so much that it is the little things in life which do give us happiness.
I am looking forward to follow all the bits and pieces which are making you happy this year :)

>90 The_Hibernator: I have this one still sitting on my TBR and I am glad to hear that you thought it was a good finale to the series. However, I acquired last year his Joe Ledger series as well as I remembered that you enjoyed that one as well.

>118 The_Hibernator: Some very good points you are making there, Rachel. I think I could do with some NJS myself. I am on a regular basis worried what people might think of me, due to my complex health issues. I am quite often worried that they maybe think that I won't be able to perform my work properly. So, I tend to hide when I feel unwell. The other thing what I always hate and don't wont is - pitty!

I wish you a wonderful and Happy week, Rachel!

Stasia's reason to be happy today: It is Monday! I have three days off work before I have to go back on Thursday :)

>120 alcottacre: That's a wonderful reason, Stasia :)

>116 The_Hibernator: Rachel, so many choices with Karen Armstrong! Everything I've read by her is really good. Most recently I read her book about Jerusalem. My recommendation? Just pick something which looks interesting to you and go for it.

>120 alcottacre: Yay for Mondays Stasia! At least when you're Stasia! :)

>121 drachenbraut23: Hi Bianca!

>122 AuntieClio: I'll probably just start with the books I already own. I think I ha A History of God on audio.

Sorry I went absent for a while, I've been really tired and going to bed soon after I get home. Hopefully this won't last long. But I saved up some happiness for all of you while I was sleeping.

Rachel's reasons for happiness day 12

This was an uneventful day in which things went fine at work and in DBT. Then I went directly to bed when I got home at 7:30, so I'm happy that I was kept usefully busy at work and that I had time to get that sleep that I really needed. :)

Rachel's reasons for happiness day 13

This was another uneventful day at work and DBT. Everything went well. And I'm happy that I got a free bag of Cheetos from the vending machine.

Rachel's reasons for happiness day 14



My family went out for a belated happy birthday dinner for my sister. That's my nephew Lazarus there - Colette just announced that she is pregnant again, so I'll have a third nephew (or a niece!) coming up in the next 8-9 months.

Oh, yay for another baby in the family, and Lazarus is adorable!

Oh wonderful news!

Thanks Amber and Valerie!

Rachel's reasons for happiness day 15

Today, I'm happy about epiphanies. For about a month I had been moaning and groaning about how I had no time to apply for jobs, and that my only options to create more time were to 1) Quit my job 2) Quit DBT or 3) Stop hanging out with Joel so much. None of them seemed like an option. Then for almost a month Joel suddenly didn't have time to see me during the week. His schedule changed, he had anxiety, yadda, yadda, yadda. And I was getting so upset at him for "not wanting to see me anymore." Finally, today I realized my mistake. I had been wanting more me-time, and now I have more me-time, and I'm getting upset about it. So now I feel happy about my me-time.

>127 The_Hibernator: changing perspective just for a moment can be so liberating because suddenly you see something that has been annoying you as something that might actually work in your direction. This has been one of my 2014 epiphanies as well!
And yay for a new baby in the family!! :)

>102 The_Hibernator: Interesting comments about what is, and what isn't on Far from the Tree, Rachel. Hopefully I'll get to it this summer, and I'll touch base with you about it when I do.

>124 The_Hibernator: Lovely photo of you and Lazarus! Congratulations on the upcoming addition to your family.

Such a cute baby! I bet you are a great aunt.

It is so hard to work on non-judgemental-ness, isn't it?

Epiphanies are hard won. Congrats on the me-time perspective shift.

Today I'm happy because I've gotten a lot done already (insomnia has reared its head and I've done laundry, read, and played here on LT). After I sleep some more, I have a few things I want to do, then read and catalog books. Yay Saturday.

Rachel, I wish you a relaxed weekend.

>128 Deern: Thanks Nathalie! I'm really happy with how the epiphany has changed my perspective! I wish I hadn't wasted so much time being upset, but that's in the past and there's nothing we can do about it. :) Look to a happier future.

>129 kidzdoc: Thanks Darryl! Actually since writing >102 The_Hibernator: that note about Far From the Tree, things have changed. I now realize that he has a chapter about Schizophrenia in there, which, of course, nulls my complaint that he isn't considering the horizontal identities of people with mental illness. :) No foresight is one of the problems of listening to books instead of reading them - you can't flip ahead and see what else is covered. And he didn't mention Schizophrenia in the introduction, so I assumed it wasn't covered. I wonder what else he'll cover in this long book? It's very interesting, and I shall certainly read his other book The Noonday Demon, thanks to >104 qebo: Katherine.

>130 banjo123: Thanks Rhonda! Yes true nonjudgmentalness is impossible to achieve, I believe. Except maybe for a higher power which has infinite mental capacity. ;) We mere humans are stuck with minds that categorize data in order to process it. Categorization leads to assumptions. So by the nature of how our minds work, we pass judgments. It's just a matter of how many of those assumptions we can drop and still be functional in society. This is what we'd call a "dialectic" in DBT. *laughs at her own use of DBT terminology* In a "dialectic" you can picture a see-saw such as the one I have up in >6 The_Hibernator:. The healthy range is somewhere in the middle where the see-saw is balanced. I guess that would be where Nonjudgmental Stance (NJS) is. On the far right, the see-saw tips towards an unhealthy level of judgement in which our ability to function is impaired by too many assumptions. And on the far left, the see-saw tips towards unhealthy level of non-categorization in which we lose our ability to process simple information because we can no longer make connections between one item of data and another. I hadn't thought about it this way, thanks for the insight Rhonda!

>131 karenmarie: HI Karen! I hope your Saturday turns out just the way you want it. :)

>132 Ameise1: Thanks Barbara!

Rachel's Reasons for happiness day 16

On this day, I'm happy that the weekend is coming, and that I got to start it out by having coffee with my friend Kari. :)

Good morning, Rachel!

My t suggested I read a book by Brene Brown called Daring Greatly. There's a lot in it that made me think of you including this quote by Brother Daniel Steinell-Rast

"It's not joy that makes us grateful; it is gratitude that makes us joyful."

I know that DBT is keeping you very busy but if you're not familiar with Brown, I think you'd enjoy her TED talks. She's actually very funny and engaging.

https://www.ted.com/speakers/brene_brown

It's been a rough week at work (timepoints at 10pm that take about an hour and a half) and so I'm glad that it's the weekend, especially a three day weekend. I'll see my daughter later on today when I drive to her town and have a haircut and a bit of shopping.

That's good to know about Far from the Tree, Rachel. I would also recommend The Noonday Demon to you; I gave it 4½ stars when I reviewed it several years ago.

I hope that you have an enjoyable weekend!

I've finished reading chapter 1 of An Introduction to the New Testament, by Raymond E Brown for the great course The New Testament (The Great Courses, Course Number 656), by Bart D. Ehrman.

Notes on Chapter 1:

The meaning of the word "Testament" has developed over time. At first, it was in reference to deals God had made with Noah, Abraham, David, and Moses - most notably the one to Moses in which the people of Israel were made "God's chosen people." Almost 600 years before the birth of Jesus, the prophet Jeremiah predicted "The days are coming when I will make a new covenant..." (Jer 31:31), where a covenant is a testament, and new means renewed. Then, before Jesus died, he referenced a new covenant/testament in his blood. Through his death and resurrection, therefore, Christians believed that god had renewed his covenant with his people, this time including the Gentiles. Only in the 2nd century do we see the word "testament" referring to a body of literature.

And, in fact, the idea of recording Jesus' story and sayings did not occur until after Jesus' death. Jesus didn't produce any written lectures, nor did he, in any of the Christian writings, suggest that his word be recorded. Letters were the first form of literature on Christian beliefs, and they were meant to answer immediate, pressing problems in the community to which they were addressed. Therefore, the letters of Paul have a different tone and emphasis in each, sometimes to the point of seeming contradictory.

By the late 60s, anybody who had had direct contact with Jesus had died. The passing of the first generation of Christians led to writings of a more permanent nature. These include the deuteroPauline writings such as II Thes, Col, Eph, I and II Tim, and Titus, which were written after Paul's death. The deuteroPauline letters have a more permanent and universal tone than earlier letters.

The Gospels also had a more permanent tone than early Pauline letters, but relevance to Christian problems would still have influenced which works were preserved. Mark's gospel emphasized the suffering of Christ on the cross, which would relate easily to the sufferings of early Christian persecution. The gospels of Matthew and Luke, probably written about 20 years later, are much more focused on the Jesus tradition, including sayings of Jesus which are hypothesized to originated in an earlier document dubbed "Q."

The Acts of the Apostles was probably meant as a continuation of Luke's gospel. It moved the story of Christianity beyond Jerusalem and Judea to Samaria and beyond.

The Book of Revelation is an example of apocalyptic literature with roots in Ezekiel and Zechariah. Apocalyptic literature was quite common at the time. Unfortunately, many modern readers have forgotten that the book was written to 1st century Christians, who would be quite familiar with the symbolic meaning of apocalyptic literature; they therefore interpret the Book of Revelation literally.

There are three reasons early Christian writings were preserved: 1) Apostolic origin - books that were purported to be written by apostles of Jesus (or Paul) had special place among Christians. 2) Which Christian communities the literature was addressed to - for instance, very little literature survives from Jerusalem or Judea, which was torn apart by the Jewish Revolt in 66-70. 3) Conformity with the rule of faith.

There is also a question of why we need 4 gospels instead of just 1. (This was discussed in my notes on >63 The_Hibernator: Gamble's book.) Brown suggests that concentration on one gospel could be used to support theology rejected by a large number of Christians. An example of this problem is the beliefs of the Marcionites (also mentioned in detail in my notes on >63 The_Hibernator: Gamble). The Marcionites believed that the creator God is not the same as the all-loving God of the NT. Therefore, the OT and teachings of Judaism should be rejected. Brown suggests that one reason the Church embraced four gospels was to refute Marcion's belief that only the gospel of Luke and the letters of Paul should be considered as canon. Brown also suggests that the Church embraced the OT to refute Marcion's rejection of it. However, in his book Gamble cautioned against putting too much emphasis on ONE driving factor for the Church's choices, and I agree with him on that.

NEWLY ADDED TO "CURRENTLY READING:"



I'm reading Love without End, by Glenda Green. This is a book my aunt Michele loaned me.

Very nice summary of Chapter One, Rachel!

>135 streamsong: Hi Janet! Glad you have a weekend break from your 10pm timepoints! :) Thanks for the recommendation, I'll take a look into her.

>136 kidzdoc: Thanks Darryl!

And for all of your viewing pleasure, here's a dashcam video of a police officer car-dancing to Shake It Off:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8XFBUM8dMqw

In my final text for Lesson 1 of The New Testament (The Great Courses, Course Number 656), I read chapters 1-3 of The New Testament: A Student's Introduction, by Stephen L. Harris.

I found these notes from chapter 3 worth sharing, since I was unaware of the differences between these groups before reading this text:

Chapter 3: The Diverse World of Fist-Century Judaism

Sadducees: Priests that conservatively stuck to a literal reading of the Torah, eschewing the "oral traditions" of the Pharisees. The Sadducees were the ones who turned Jesus over to the Romans for execution. They were the ones who stood the most to lose if there was fighting between the Romans and the Jews because the Sadducees seem to have been the chief mediators between the Roman rulers and the Jews. They disappeared after the sacking of Jerusalem by the Romans in 70CE.

Pharisees: These priests were also conservative, but they also had an oral law, which was later recorded as Mishnah in 200CE. Although there seems to be a lot of dispute between Jesus and the Pharisees in the Bible, Jesus most likely got along fine with most Pharisees (as can be seen in some Biblical stories). The disputes between Jesus and the Pharisees may have been biased by problems between the early Christians and the Pharisees around the time the Gospels were written.

Samaritins: This is a group of people (named after their capital city Samaria) related to the Jews by religion, but whom the Jews in Judea regarded as alien. Instead of worshiping at the Temple at Mount Zion, the Samaritins worshiped at Mount Gerizim. The Samaritins recognized only the Mosaic Torah, and not the Prophets or other biblical writings.

Essenes: These are the people who are thought to have written the Dead Sea Scrolls somewhere between the mid-second century and late first century CE. Little is known about them, but their practices seem to have many similarities to later Christian practices, though Jesus is never mentioned outright. It is supposed by Harris that this is a non-Christian sect that anticipated some Christian rituals, rather than a group of early Christians. There also seem to be some parallels between the Book of Hebrews and Essenes' beliefs.

2015 Media #5 / Mt TBR #3: Lesson 1 of The New Testament (The Great Courses, Course Number 656)

Lecture 1: The Early Christians and Their Literature

This was an introductory lecture which suggested a few ways to study the New Testament: 1) as a faithful believer; 2) From a cultural perspective (e.g. the NT's influence on Western culture and on literature); and 3) From the historical context of the initial audience. Erhman's course intends on studying the NT from the third perspective.

He gives some background information: there are 27 books in the NT, all written by Christians of the 1st century. Many of these books claim to be written by direct apostles of Jesus (i.e. people who are considered to have been sent directly by Jesus to spread his word). All of the books were originally written in Greek.

The 27 books of the NT comprise 4 major groups. 1) The four Gospels, describing the birth, life, and death of Jesus; 2) The Acts of the Apostles, describing the spread of Christianity around the world; 3) 21 epistles, 13 of which are written by Paul, with a focus on the beliefs and ethics of Christianity; 4) The Book of Revelation, which is a piece of apocalyptic literature, originally thought to have been written by the apostle John, but later revealed to have been written by another John. (The belief that it was written by the apostle is why it attained popularity among early Christians.)

Texts read:
>63 The_Hibernator: The New Testament: A Historical Introduction to the Early Christian Writings, by Bart D. Ehrman - Chapter 1
>141 The_Hibernator: The New Testament: A Student's Introduction by Steven Harris - Chapters 1 - 3
>137 The_Hibernator: An Introduction to the New Testament By Raymond Brown - Chapter 1
>63 The_Hibernator: The New Testament Canon, by Harry Y Gamble

Happy Sunday, Rachel! Glad to see your Reasons for Happiness continue. Always puts a smile on my face.

Weekly update

This week I acquired no new books, and I finished>142 The_Hibernator: Lesson 1 of The New Testament (The Great Courses, Course Number 656).

At work things went OK. I'm still feeling a bit overwhelmed by my irresponsible staff, but I just hired two new members this week, so perhaps things will start getting better soon. I also am working out a deal with a local social support institution which looks for jobs for mentally ill people who have been out of the work-force for a while or who can't work a full-time job. I'm hoping I can get some new people that way. :) However, I need to write up a job description for that, and I'm a bit busy/lazy/procrastinator. Hopefully next week that will be set in motion.

Personal life was not so great. I finally got the information for my new insurance, and found out that NONE of my providers is covered. At least, that's what it appears from the company's website. I'll have to call up each provider one by one on Tuesday (because Monday's a holiday) to find out if that's true. If so, I'll have to find a new psychiatrist BEFORE I run out of meds (they are hard to find, and harder when your in-network pool is so small!), a new therapist, a new general practitioner (I loved Dr Spears!!!), and I'll have to drop out of DBT. It's like losing all of my support network at once, and it's very concerning. However, there's still hope until I talk to each place individually. I'll keep you updated if you're interested.

Also, my boyfriend Joel is getting harder to get along with. I'm not sure what's wrong with him - he claims nothing is wrong, yet he is alienating everyone in his life. He dropped his alcoholic treatment program and his therapist because his insurance didn't cover them, and he has no intent on replacing them because he says AA is enough and he's "on the road to recovery." Two or three weeks ago he almost checked himself into the hospital with suicidal thoughts. That is not "nothing." So, of course, I'm concerned about what's really going on in his life right now, why he's alienating everyone. And I'm frustrated because I have mental health issues of my own and it's hard dealing with his as well. :( However, I'll be meeting up with him later today and I'll see if I can coax some truth out of him - about how he's really feeling right now.

In DBT we're learning how to distract ourselves from our distress with the lovely acronym ACCEPTS:

A: Activities - find an activity which will keep your mind off your stress. (I do this by reading, watching netflix, reading, talking to friends, and, of course, reading. You'd think I'd finish more books than I do!)

C: Contribute - This doesn't have to be volunteering. It can be as small as smiling at someone or washing the dishes for your family. Raising kids is a form of contributing. (I volunteer at a crisis hotline).

C: Comparison - This is the hardest of the ACCEPTS skills. You need to learn to compare yourself to others (to yourself) in a positive way. It's easy to look at someone and see how great they're doing and feel depressed. It's harder to look at someone else and be like "I want to be that way" and feel uplifted. It's easy to look at someone who's worse off than you and say "Wow. Life sucks. It sucks more for them than for me, so I feel bad about feeling as depressed as I do." It's harder to say "look at that person who's in a worse place than me. Things could be worse." and feel uplifted. I like comparing myself to myself much better. I can say "look at where I am compared to where I was." That works pretty well. And I can say "look at where I want to be...that's possible if I work towards it."

E: Emotions - This one is similar to distract, only you're distracting yourself with the purpose of creating other emotions than the one you're wallowing in.

P: Push Away - This is where you lock your problem up somewhere so that you can worry about it on another day when you're better able to handle it. They even recommend that we visualize putting it in a box and locking it up. And also writing things down, and then hiding that in a drawer for another day. The writing thing I do all the time. I make a to-do list so that I can remember all of the things I need to do to get through the problem, then I don't have to stress about it as much. I also have a place that I consider my "safe place." It's a dome that keeps out demons. I visualize my spirit hiding out under that dome and all the demons (like righteous anger, resentment, terror, mental illness etc.) are unable to get at me. That is very calming. I have a very detailed safe place. It's my grandmother's house, superimposed on the beach of Lake Tahoe, with mountains in the background and the ocean on the other side (strangely enough the ocean is located OUTSIDE the dome...I need to go out there and face my demons sometimes.) I have some friends there who also need to be safe from demons. They each have a house. It's quite nice. :)

T: Thoughts - Mindfully focus on other thoughts. I'm not a very mindful person, so this one is hard for me, but I think this is somewhat what I'm doing with my visualization described in Push Away.

S: Sensations - Here you distract yourself by doing something physically active or exhausting. Like exercise, cleaning, etc.

Personally, I think distracting yourself is the easiest form of distress tolerance. Though I haven't had time to learn the others yet, and I might not ever have time. Unless I go through my manual by myself, which is possible. :)

>139 ronincats: Thanks Roni! I'm glad someone enjoys my notes. :)

>143 msf59: Thanks Mark! I'm happy that so many people are liking my happy days.

Rachel's reasons to be happy day 17

I am happy that yesterday I was able to sleep despite having a stressful day. Sometimes sleep is the ultimate healer. Also, because Morphy cancelled our bookclub meeting, I get more time to read the book The Coldest Girl in Coldtown AND I had time to focus on my New Testament studies. :)

Rachel's reasons to be happy day 18

Today I got to spend time with my boyfriend Joel. We played Canasta (I won), Cribbage (he won) and Carcassonne (I won). I also got to drop by people's threads on LibraryThing, which is always a joy.

>144 The_Hibernator: NONE of my providers is covered
This is insurance from work? Sure seems a conversation with someone is in order if the consequences are so drastic.

see if I can coax some truth out of him
Any progress?

>146 The_Hibernator: I also got to drop by people's threads on LibraryThing
You sure did. Suddenly your name was everywhere. :-)

Thanks for stopping by my thread, too, Rachel! I'm sorry you've had such a challenging weekend. There are so many people here that are unable to get the medical care they need because of the insurance.

I finished my DBT course several years ago using free online DBT classes. I think I did the one through Yahoogroups. Not as a good as face to face, but better, I think for me at least, than doing it on your own - although your motivation and thoroughness with whatever you tackle, like the NT study, absolutely amaze me.

>144 The_Hibernator: Rachel, I'm sorry to read about the insurance situation. Replacing trusted doctors is time-consuming and stressful. I'm glad you were still able to find some happy things. Mine for today is finally starting a project that I've been putting off for ages, and it's such a relief to have it started!

I'm sorry, too, to hear about the unenviable position you are in as regards insurance and looking for new doctors. Replacing trusted doctors is very difficult: time-consuming and stressful, as Susan says.

Love your reasons to be happy posts! An inspiration. Mine for today: sitting drinking coffee and visiting on LT before going to a job I enjoy. I'm grateful.

So happy to see you continuing to find things to celebrate, big or small, each day. Keep it up, Rachel. :)

Great to see you around the threads as well. Hopefully the issue with the insurance works out and that Joe is able to open up to you!

>119 drachenbraut23: - I expect we all could use a healthy dose of NJS. :)

Loved reading all the happy thoughts. Good luck with insurance. I believe there is an avenue for someone with the issues that you have to appeal - try the insurance commissioners office? You shouldn't have to change your entire support network.

>147 qebo: Hi Katherine. Yes, this is insurance from work. Though I'm not certain who to talk to about it. I can talk to the agent, but she's superbly unhelpful and (possibly willfully) incompetent.

I did manage to have a good talk with Joel yesterday. We agreed that his behavior had drastically changed and that he had alienated some people. That we were fighting more and more, and that the arguments made both of us feel bad. He admitted that he WAS mentally unhealthy, but that he didn't want to pay $11000 (he claims) in deductible before getting his therapy covered. I agreed that this was a huge amount of money and I see why he's not going to therapy. We agreed that at least the AA was helping him out.

And then I suggested that perhaps he feels too much shame, and this is why he's alienating people. I explained how shame is unhealthy but guilt is healthy. That it's good to express guilt: "I feel bad that I did this," because he can learn from his mistakes and recognize where he went wrong. But it's unhealthy when the guilt becomes shame and affects how he feels about himself. (i.e. I'm a bad boyfriend or a bad father - both of which he says) He agreed that maybe this was the case, and that he'd think about it.

Perhaps I shouldn't lecture him on my therapy lessons, but I hate to see all the resentment and shame in him because those are the two big things that lead to relapse.

We'll see if the conversation did any good. Hopefully it did.

>148 streamsong: Hi Janet! That's a good idea to look into it on Yahoogroups. I wonder if they have anything like that on EdEx or Coursera? I haven't checked out their available courses for a while. For now, it looks like the DBT place is willing to try to work something out with me. They told me not to do anything drastic and just drop out. :) That's a huge relief, because I'd miss my people.

>149 susanj67: Hi Susan! Yay for ending the cycle of procrastination!

>150 lit_chick: Thanks Nancy! It's always so nice to hear why everyone else is happy. :) It makes my thread a nice place to be.

>151 jolerie: Thanks Valerie! See my comment to Katherine about Joel, and to Janet about DBT. :)

>152 nittnut: Hi Jenn! Insurance commissioner? I didn't even know there was such a thing. I agree that I shouldn't have to change my entire network!

Rachel's reasons for happiness day 19

Today I'm happy that I have so many supportive friends that helped me through this stressful time in my life as I worry about having to switch ALL my providers because of my insurance. I'm also happy to see some real snowflakes instead of that stuff that falls when it's dreadfully cold. And I'm happy it wasn't much snow, because then we'd have to remove it. And I'm happy that I worked things out with Joel.

You're in Minnesota, right? Here's a place to start, you may have to try a couple different avenues, but someone should be able to advise you.

http://mn.gov/commerce/insurance/consumers/tools/complaints/

Rachel, I think you are amazing!

And practice the visualization thing! I used to use that technique with my counseling students for anxiety, and if you practice it, it can really become powerful. Just like athletes visualizing their performance.

The ACCEPTS acronym is really interesting, and I am trying to integrate the Push-Away part into my life right now, because I tend to over-worry. Just a couple of days ago I read a similar approach in another book and I highlighted it. It said you shouldn't just hide away those worries, but give them a dedicated space, like "right now I have no time for you (you worries), but tonight at 7pm I give you 20 minutes of my time". The author said you should then best set a timer and during those 10/20 minutes really look at the worries and ask yourself how likely those things might happen (usually it's very worst case scenarios playing in our heads) and what would be the effect on us should it really happen and what can we realistically do to prevent them (often we worry too much about things we can't influence anyway).

Wishing you that in some way or other the insurance issue will be resolved in a way that's good for you. Even if that should mean new providers, but maybe they will be just what you need right now?(just trying to put a positive angle to the natually terrifying idea that you might have to let go of the people who helped you in the past)

I had to do the push away for a time while MrMorphy had his surgery and recovered. Now that he's almost all better (in record time!), the depression has come flooding back. Thankfully, it's not as bad as before but still pretty unpleasant. I'm sorry to hear that yours has also gotten worse. Depression sucks.

>155 nittnut: thanks Jenn! I'll definitely check that out. Also, i talked to my insurance company today and they said I could "nominate" providers. I'm going to try that route as well. I'm Gonna do whatever I can!

>156 ronincats: Thanks for the complement Roni. :) I really should do the visualization thing more often - I tend to only do it when I'm in crisis. Exercising those meditation muscles when I'm calm is good practice.

>157 Deern: that's an interesting way of looking at push-away, Nathalie - to literally set a time for thinking about it. I can see how that would be helpful for worriers.

Thanks for the positive vibes!

>158 Morphidae: In the lucky people depression goes down in times of real crisis, especially the crisis of a loved one. I'm Glad you were lucky on that part. :) But it seems to always come back, doesn't it? I am having a very productive day despite my current insurance crisis. I Need to ride that crisis-induced clarity as long as I can!

Rachel's reasons for happiness day 20

I had an incredibly productive day both at work and at home today. Got new tags for my car (didn't even have to pay a fee for letting them expire!), went to bank and post office, called MA providers, called insurance provider, etc.

>160 The_Hibernator: Well that all sounds highly unfun, but isn't it lovely to get this sort of task out of the way? (*glancing over at my annoying to-do list*) Anything definitive from the insurance calls?

>153 The_Hibernator: when the guilt becomes shame and affects how he feels about himself
Very much an easier said than done thing.

>160 The_Hibernator: That would be an amazing day for me, as new car tags, post office visits, and calling insurance companies are the three task-oriented things that most bring out the procrastinator in me. True story! It's a thing.

Sending warm thoughts your way!

>161 qebo: Katherine: No, I didn't get anything definitive from the insurance calls, other than the fact that I can "nominate" providers, but that might not work and would take a couple of months. We'll see. I'll do what I can, anyway.

I agree that such things are easier said than done. Joel might be doing all he can do right now. We'll see if he can turn himself around. I can't stay in a relationship where I give give give and don't get back in return. But I don't want to break up with him if he's just going through a rough spot. He was a great boyfriend up until recently. I need to hold on to that memory while he tries to sort through his problems.

>162 DorsVenabili: :) I was pretty proud of myself yesterday.

Rachel's reasons for happiness day 21

So, today was a hard day. I had to terminate one of my unreliable employees, which is a pain - but, on the other hand, a lot of my work related stress had to do with wondering if she would even show up for work on days that she's scheduled. I have to work Saturday because I terminated her - but now I KNOW I have to work Saturday instead of making plans and having them canceled last minute. That does wonders on my anxiety. So I'm happy that I have relief from that anxiety.

I am also happy that I got through the rest of the hard day, which was mostly centered around finding someone to replace the terminated employee, dealing with an unexpected tour with big-wig bosses, dealing with an expected appearance of the dreaded insurance guy who wanted to con my poor employees into buying the terrible insurance that I am subjected to, and so on and so forth. So, busy day. But, I'm happy that I got through the day in without having any intense anxiety to deal with. I'm proud of myself for dealing with such a stressful day. :)

>135 streamsong: oh big ups for Brene Brown

Rachel, if you have an HR person, they should be able to help you with your insurance. Maybe ask your current doctors what other insurance they accept so you can try and coordinate changes that way. I'm having to do the same thing myself, and it is no fun.

ACCEPTS is interesting, thanks for writing so much about it Rachel.

Positive thoughts and energy for a good Friday for you!

>124 The_Hibernator: Love the photo of you and Lazarus, Rachel and congrats to another baby arriving in the next few month.

I enjoy your daily accounts quite a lot, thank you for sharing them with us.

I need to dig my DBT manual out and start reviewing it again.

I am sorry you have so much on your plate right now (boyfriend, job woes, insurance); but it seems like you are dealing with it all really well.

>166 AuntieClio: thanks for the advice Stephanie. :) I'll try HR too. So many places to look for help, when LT friends unite.

>167 karenmarie: thanks Karen! I work on Sat, so Friday won't really feel like a Friday. But at least I have Sunday!

>168 drachenbraut23: thanks Bianca! Good to see you around!

>169 Morphidae: I have a DBT app on my phone. :)

>170 banjo123: thanks Rhonda. I'm surprised at how well I'm handling this. I think I'm in some sort of positive crisis mode. :)

Rachel's reasons for happiness day 22

My DBT buddy Todd gave me a book The Remarkable Miss Frankenstein

A new book is a great reason for happiness! I will add mine - this morning my husband said that his parents were wondering what to give me for my birthday. I believe in 22 years, this may be the first time they have ever asked. Naturally I said "Amazon gift card!" Imagine if I got to buy books for my birthday instead of receiving yet another piece of jewelry I will never ever wear? Feeling hopeful. :)

>171 The_Hibernator: I'll have to check to see if there is one for the iPad!

>172 The_Hibernator: New books are always good reasons to be happy :) Just got a new Kindle and that was my reason for happiness yesterday. Wishing you a lovely weekend!

>173 nittnut: Yup Jenn! New books are always a reason for happiness. And I have 3 more new books since then. I'm becoming impulsive again! I'll keep my fingers crossed for you and that Amazon gift card!

>174 Morphidae: Hi Morphy! There should be - I imagine if it's on my iPhone it's on your iPad. :)

>75 lovelyluck: Hi literary.feline! A Kindle is a great reason to be happy. I have a Nook, myself, and if I were to do it all over again, I'd probably save up for an iPad. But the Nook or Kindle are great inexpensive alternatives, aren't they? :)

Rachel's reasons for happiness day 23

First, I'm happy that I had a short day at work - of course, that's because I'm working tomorrow, but it still felt great. I'm also happy that I got to go out to Mongolian BBQ for dinner with my mom while dad and Johnny were snowboarding. And I'm happy about my three new books The How of Happiness, Born to be Good, and The Compassionate Instinct. I purchased these books after impulsively signing up for an at-your-own-pace MOOC The Science of Happiness on EdEx. These books are supplementary reading for the course, they are not "required readings," but you know how I love supplementary reading. I thought the course would fit in well with my happiness theme this year.

Interesting articles so far:

A Mongrel Half-Bred Race http://www.laphamsquarterly.org/foreigners/mongrel-half-bred-race

An satire of British xenophobia written by Daniel Defoe

Mistaken Identities http://www.laphamsquarterly.org/foreigners/mistaken-identities

An interesting essay by Langston Hughes about mistaken racial identities.

The Science of Happiness class looks quite intriguing. I'll be interested to hear your thoughts on it as you go along.

>177 The_Hibernator: Rachel, a friend did the Science of Happiness edX course and said it was the best course she's ever done. I'm signed up for the at-your-own-pace version too, but I have too many with deadlines to have made much progress with it!

I've just looked up Lapham's Quarterly and it looks excellent. Thanks for the links!

I started the Science of Happiness course but didn't know about the at-your-own-pace version and got overwhelmed. I may try it again later this year with that version.

Can you give me the name of the DBT app?

>179 streamsong: Hi Janet! I'm excited about the course and looking forward to sharing.

>180 susanj67: Hi Susan, as I've told you before I have a bad habit of signing up for too many MOOCs at a time, too. Right now, I'm only signed up for that one, though. I'm trying to focus on my New Testament studies. But I couldn't pass up the opportunity to take a self-paced course on happiness.

I LOVE Lapham's Quarterly. It's a great way to read some interesting snippets (both from essays/journalistic writings and from fiction). It has snippets from new authors and classic authors. I can't imagine how literary someone has to be to come be able to publish a magazine like this 4 times a year. How much reading they must do to get those few chosen articles!

>181 Morphidae: I started it last year, too, but it was right around the time I was hospitalized, so the deadlines were too much for me. This one is still separated into "week-long" lectures, but you don't have to take a week to do them. :) The deadline is May 2015 to get a grade, but I imagine they'll just start a new deadline once that one passes. That hopefully leaves enough time for me to finish the course. :)

The name of the DBT app is DBT Diary Card and Skills Coach. But I think I spent money on it, if that's a deterrent. I'm rather happy with it. It has a daily diary card to fill out, and you can get a PDF file of your progress. It also gives a nice description of each skill, and even has a coaching feature - though I haven't used it.

Rachel's reasons for happiness day 24

Yesterday I had a bit of the stomach flu and spent the day in bed. But sometimes it's nice to lie in bed and get nothing done. I got lots of my audiobook Far from the Tree read, and am hoping to finish it soon because I need to start Perks of Being a Wallflower for next month's book-club.

Happy Sunday, Rachel. Hope you are feeling a bit better today. I loved Perks and it was a pretty good movie too.

>182 The_Hibernator: No, paying is not a deterrent. In fact, I'm downloading it right now. I got $40 in gift certificates for Apple for Christmas 2013 and still haven't used it all!

Yes indeed, hope you are feeling better today, Rachel!

Thanks for Lapham's Quarterly. With all my reading and my interest in history, I'm sorry to say I'd never heard of it. I just signed up for the print edition - I am very excited about getting the first one, whenever that will be!!!

2015 Media #6 / Book #3: The Coldest Girl in Coldtown, by Holly Black

Reason for reading: This was the January pick for my bookclub.

Summary: In this near-future book, vampires have emerged into the public eye due to an outbreak started by a sloppy newly-made vampire who left his victims living instead of completely draining them. Vampires, and the Cold (people infected with the vampirism disease, but who haven't yet tasted the blood of humans and so haven't turned) are forced to live in ghettos called Coldtowns. In this setting, the story starts out with Tana waking up to a vampire-related disaster, which begins both a physical journey away from the disaster and a spiritual journey of self-discovery.

What I thought: This book was fast-paced and difficult to put down. It asked some interesting philosophical questions. Do we all have monsters within us? Do we crave immortality and beauty at the price of humanity? If not, why are so many people attracted to paranormal romances? Is it because we want the ultimate bad-boy? Or, in the opposite line of questioning, why do so many people seek good in what seems evil?

NEWLY ADDED TO CURRENTLY READING:



The Remarkable Miss Frankenstein, by Minda Webber is a book given to me by a DBT friend. Not really the type of book I'd have gone for next, but I thought I'd give it a try since it was a sweet gift.

Weekly Update:

Book News: This week I finished reading The Coldest Girl in Coldtown, by Holly Black.(comments)

I acquired 5 new books (oops!). They are:



A gift from my DBT friend, Todd. It's not the type of book I'd normally read (too cheap romancy), but I'm giving it a try because it was a sweet gift.



These were all purchased to supplement the self-paced MOOC I have signed up for: The Science of Happiness



This week's Free Friday Nookbook from Barnes and Noble. It's good that it was free, because the reviews of it are terrible - I should have read them before downloading. On the other hand, it was free.

Personal News:This was another difficult week as I struggled to find solutions to my insurance problem. I also have to terminate an employee and write up another one. I'm desperately seeking another job - one in which I can stop thinking about it when I go home for the evening/weekend. I really need that right now. I have not yet found solutions to my insurance problem, though thanks to people here on LT I have a few leads to follow. My DBT facilitator tells me to keep coming, that they'll work something out. I hope he's right. Because otherwise I'll be getting a hefty bill soon.

DBT news: This week we studied Self-Soothing. When we get stressed out, we can try calming ourselves down with things that we find soothing to our senses. For instance, for sight I could look at pictures of loved ones or places that are special to me. Or I could look at art. Or I could stare at a sleeping child, which is a frequent pass-time, if I'm to believe the books I read. For sound I could listen to music or to background noise like rain forest, rivers, birds, or even white noise. Lots of people use candles or flowers to produce a calming smell. Eating "mindfully" soothes through taste. (To eat mindfully one must really concentrate on how something tastes, you shouldn't just mindlessly eat...) For touch - this is a little embarrassing - but I enjoy touching things to my mouth and feeling the texture. But you could also squeeze a stress toy or pet your cat, etc. You can combine more than one sense at a time (in reality everything you do combines more than one sense, so this is stating the obvious. There is also your "mind sense" and your "spiritual sense." For the mind sense, you could think peaceful thoughts or affirmations. I figure you could also do sudoku or something that exercises your mind, but still soothes. To soothe the spiritual sense you could meditate or pray.

These are skills that I don't often use. Or if I do use them, I don't think about it.

Never mind this post. It was an accident. :)

Happy Sunday, Rachel. Sorry, no photo this weekend due to my busy RL.

>184 msf59: Thanks Mark! Happy weekend to you, too. I look forward to reading Perks.

>185 Morphidae: Hi Morphy! Wow. $40. I hope you enjoy the app.

>186 karenmarie: Hi Karen! I hope you enjoy Lapham's Quarterly as much as my father and I do. I AM feeling much better. I actually got some real reading done today, rather than just audiobooking it.

>191 Ameise1: Thanks Barbara, you too! I'll live without the picture because I know how hectic RL can be.

>190 The_Hibernator: I agree that it would be difficult to stand out when compared to LOTR. I think that the current glut of teen dystopian romances would be in his favor. Something a little different could really work. I like quest books - I like the characters to have a goal or task with a real purpose.

For me, a successful fantasy book is a lot about setting. I have to believe in the world the author creates. For example, I liked Terry Brooks Shanarra series, but hated Magic Kingdom for Sale, Sold, mostly because I never really bought into the world he created. Brandon Sanderson comes to mind as an author who is a very successful world builder and quest creator. He writes across the range, youth to YA and adult, and some of his adult books, Mistborn is a good example, could just as easily be YA. He is churning out books with magical worlds and quests at a rate that boggles the mind. :)

Hi, Rachel ~ Hope you're having a great Sunday. So sorry to hear how stressful your job is and just want to say I have been there and even took a month off (medical (i.e. stress) leave) in order to participate in an intense course of therapy on how to cope with stress. Only thing that worked for me was leaving that job, so I hope you find something else soon.

I've been lurking but not posting, but I wanted to let you know that your DBT news about self-soothing exercises (>189 The_Hibernator:) really resonates with me, first because, like you, I seldom meditate or do calming exercises when I'm in the middle of a stressful situation, unless someone/thing reminds me to do so, and second because over on Jenny's (Lunacat's) thread she asked what sounds made us smile. As I was listing the sounds that make me happy, I was instantly soothed. Since then, I've been taking a minute or so a day to pick a happy sound and think about it on it until I feel calm. Amazingly effective!

PEARL RULED:



Love without End, by Glenda Green. This is a book my aunt Michele loaned me, and it was the book that made her fall back in love with Jesus. I could tell immediately it wasn't my type of book, because I'm not a fan of book that share their meaning in the form of dialog. I want allegory, not dialog. On the other hand, I DID find the first section of the book (before the dialog with Jesus started) interesting. It was about the events leading up to and following her conversations with Christ. Now, keep in mind that she claimed that Christ and she had extensive conversations and that he was there in the room, sitting for a her painting. According to the painting, he has dazzlingly blue eyes and chestnut hair. :) I hear rumor that this fits the description of Jesus given in Heaven is for Real.

Don't get me wrong, even though I Pearl ruled this book doesn't mean it didn't have its inspiring moments. For instance, it pointed out "When you are in the presence of your enemies, you know for a fact that any love you feel is not because of external factors...you know that you are love." In other words, love for your enemies is pure - it isn't tainted with lust or greed.

Green's Jesus also had an interesting philosophy of "innocent perception." To Green, this was the action of seeing things as they are without categorizing the information with our minds. This idea reminded me a lot of the observe/describe of DBT - where you project a non-judgmental view on whatever you observe, and you describe not what you think, but what is (i.e. I feel a burning sensation on my tongue when I taste this food, instead of Mom put too much spice in the food.) This perception also reminded me of the philosophy of phenomenology.

Green's Jesus proposed a Trinity composed of Love, Spirit, and Adamantine Particles (a.k.a the Higgs Boson). Although this trinity made me chuckle a little - especially after all the recent news coverage of the Higgs Boson. However, it does have a certain beauty to it. I admit to knowing very little about the Higgs Boson other than the fact that it is nicknamed "The God Particle," and that Green suggests that it is a particle that creates mass and is unbreakable.

One issue I had with this book is that she put her emphasis in bold. And she used so much bolded emphasis that it became distracting! I assume this is because she decided to put Christ's words in italics. Funny thing is, she also put T. S. Elliot's poems in italics. ;)

NEWLY ADDED TO CURRENTLY READING:



The Meaning of Jesus: Two Visions, by Marcus Borg and N. T. Wright is a book I'm reading in my study of the historical Jesus.

>196 The_Hibernator: I saw on the In Memorium thread that Marcus Borg died just a few days ago. I have several of his books, but no longer recall which I've read.

I am finally caught up with this thread Rachel and I love that you have continued to post your daily reasons for happiness! That is such a great way to keep a positive focus. I am off to the dentist soon so hopefully I will be happy with a clean checkup. ;-)

>193 nittnut: Hi Jenn! You must have posted that before I deleted my message. :) I deleted it because I realized that my friend had sent me the wrong draft - a three paged one instead of a 130 paged one, so I shouldn't make comments on it yet. But my questions still stand and thanks for answering! I agree, a quest-fantasy would be a great relief from the dystopias and urban fantasy/romances that are popular in teen literature these days.

>194 Storeetllr: Hi Mary! I agree that really the only solution to my work stress is to find a new job at this point. I keep telling myself that this is going to happen soon. If I say it enough I'll believe it, and if I believe it, it will happen. :)

Thanks for your tip on self-soothing. I should try that. I've never thought about self-soothing by simply thinking about the sensory stimulus. I'm more sensitive to smell, though...perhaps I should stop during a stressful moment and imagine that I'm smelling something nice. Or listening to something soothing. Or eating chocolate. :)

>197 qebo: I didn't know he died, Katherine, that's too bad. I think this is the only book of his that I own, but I will certainly look up more of his since his works look very interesting.

>198 lkernagh: Thanks Lori. I hope your checkup went well!

Rachel's reason for happiness day 26
I took a break from being sick this Sunday to play a couple games of cribbage with my boyfriend Joel. :)

Rachel's reason for happiness day 27
Today I hung out with my friend Todd for coffee.

ETA: Should have been day 25 and day 26.

Games and coffee? Sounds like a wonderful reasons to be happy. :)

Just the usual lecture that I don't floss enough, but othe than that, it went great! ;-)

Well you got me with something larger than a book bullet - a MOOC mine maybe? Anyway, I decided to try the Science of Happiness in >189 The_Hibernator:. I'm about half way through the first week.

>201 jolerie: Hi Valerie! Yes! I had a good couple of days.

>202 lkernagh: I don't floss enough either, Lori. But I'm glad it went well.

>203 streamsong: OOOO! You signed up! I hope you enjoy it Janet!

Hmmm, was I a day off for last time? I should I think day 27 should have been day 26....Yup Definitely. :) So I'll change message 200 for that, and start a new thread.