Bloodsucking Fiends: A Love Story

It’s been a while since I’ve read anything from the “Rude Boys” shelf of my collection, and since it’s Spooky Season I figured it would be a perfect time to revisit Christopher Moore’s (slightly ridiculous) vampire story. Moore generally sticks to the established vampire lore with this book, but it isn’t really about vampires when it comes down to it; the vampires are just an excuse to have a fun romp through the (relatively harmless) parts of San Francisco’s underbelly. The story revolves around two characters: Jody, a newly minted vamp with little knowledge of how to actually harness her powers, and Tommy, a newly arrived to ‘Frisco midwestern grocery manager, who fancies himself a writer. Of course, Jody picks show more Thomas as her human minion, fulfilling his wildest sexual fantasies (hence Moore’s place on the Rude Boys shelf), and Tommy is all to happy to oblige - until things start to go a little sideways. The original vampire (one Ben Shapiro) seems to be the jealous sort, and rather than be a normal functioning master of darkness he lurks around causing murder and chaos until Tommy and his crew of midnight stockboys (“the Animals”) blow up his ship. Honestly, he’s a bit of a shite villain character, so we’re all pretty happy to see Tommy and Jody win this round. The whole story is absolutely ludicrous overall, but what it may lack in depth it makes up for in laughs, and that makes it stand out from the rest of the vampire canon. show less

Jody needs a man—but not for the usual reasons. Unexpectedly turned into a vampire, she needs someone who can get her car out of impound during the day. And she finds Tommy, barely out of high school, who’s been staying in Chinatown with five illegal immigrants, all named Wong, who want to marry him for a green card. Though Tommy, an aspiring writer, can’t quite shake the feeling he’s being used (he is), the sex is great. Together, they first fend off Jody’s mother, then turn their attention to the thorny problem of the vampire who created Jody. Bloodsucking Fiends is an entertaining look at the absurd side of life after death.

Christopher Moore’s Bloodsucking Fiends is a rollicking novel that happens to have a vampire as the main character. Its subtitle is "A Love Story", and this is more accurate a description than lumping it in the vampire oeuvre. While there are quite a few pages devoted to Jody's vampiric self-education, and the Big Baddie just happens to be her sire, the rest of the story follows Jody's overall growth into a self-sufficient woman and her burgeoning relationship with the very sweet Tommy.

In fact, the vampires in Bloodsucking Fiends provide more humor than horror. If one were to take away the vampiric elements, the heart of the story remains the same but the humor disappears. Jody is fairly squeamish for someone who exists by drinking show more blood, and one cannot be accused of murder without the "dead" body of his girlfriend found stuffed into a freezer.

In Bloodsucking Fiends, Mr. Moore satirizes more than just vampire stories. Stylistically unique, his satire of romance novels is strangely reminiscent of Jane Austen and her skewering of society and popular culture during the Victorian era. Both Austen and now Mr. Moore highlight just how trivial popular culture can be.

Susan Bennett does an admirable job narrating Bloodsucking Fiends. With only one female character and at least ten male characters, a female narrator could have been disastrous. Any doubts about a female narrator are foundless, as Ms. Bennett proves more than capable of embodying Jody, Tommy, the Emperor, and the rest of the cast. She switches back and forth between Jody and the various male characters with aplomb and manages to make each character unique and distinctive without straining her voice or the reader's credulity. Also, she balances the correct amount of snark and worry that permeates Jody, as well as Tommy's earnestness, throughout the novel. The entire story sparks under Ms. Bennett's performance.

Leave it to Mr. Moore to make vampires fun again. As a fledgling vampire, Jody is by turns absolutely hilarious in her naivete and extremely vulnerable. Tommy never loses his endearingly sweet Midwestern earnestness, and the Animals provide a much-needed comedic counterpoint to that goodness. Together, theirs truly is a love story. Decidedly silly, Bloodsucking Fiends is immensely satisfying. show less

Really fun take on the whole non-sparkly vampire thing. Sometimes it almost feels like Mr. Moore is attempting to make some sort of social statement then he bronzes a live turtle and mocks himself. Definitely for adults, but a fun read.

Aspiring writer Tommy arrives in San Francisco to gain some life experience but needs a job to pay the rent. With help from the Emperor he is quickly set up as night manager at a Safeway and this is where he encounters Jody, a newly turned vampire. She’s going to need someone to do the daytime things that need doing seeing as sunlight has a deleterious effect on her complexion and Tommy seems an ideal candidate. Tommy’s never had a girlfriend before and the sex is great so he doesn’t even mind a bit of biting if that’s what she’s into. Problems start arising for the pair when bodies start turning up near to where they’re living that are drained of blood. Jody knows she hasn’t killed anyone yet so is the vampire who made show more her playing some sort of game with her?

This is a fun, light-hearted take on the vampire mythos. I already know I like the author’s style having enjoyed several of his books previously and this one proves no exception. It was also good to run into a couple of familiar characters who help fill out the cast in this one. It’s a quick, fast-paced read and while the story is self-contained it still leaves it open enough for a sequel. I liked the characters and story enough to want to spend more time with them (though not immediately) and it’s a good job as I already have the other 2 books in the trilogy sitting on the tbr shelves already. show less

So, what do you think of when you think of vampire novels? The creepy yet compelling menace of Bela Lugosi? The tormented goth ennui of Anne Rice's Louis and Lestat? The rat-faced nightmare of Max Shrek in F.W. Murnau's Nosferatu? How about a 26 year old redhead who suffers an existential crisis when she realizes that, since her new body will never change, she'll never, ever lose those last 5 pounds? That's right folks, Christopher Moore has added a hitherto unknown element to the vampire novel: a sense of humor.

I'll admit I'm biased. I've read most everything Moore has written, and his sense of humor hits me just right. I think it has something to do with the fruitbat. Anyway, when a topic has become as cliché and stale as the vampire show more novel, a dash of humor can really freshen it up. The thing that makes this novel work is that Moore has created a vampire novel where the vampire is the least interesting character.

Next to characters like the 5 Wongs, the Vampires Anonymous support group and the Animals, our villain is a curmudgeonly old stick in the mud, hardly worthy of any attention. Which is not to say that the story has no tension, just that the more typically "horror" elements are not the main focus.

What is the main focus, you ask? Just look at the subtitle, folks. This is the book that asks can a 26 year old undead redhead and a naïve 19 year old from Incontinence, Indiana make their relationship work? But even here Moore does not settle for the obvious. Jody (the redhead) and Tommy (the naïf) have some issues, but they have very little to do with the whole blood-drinking, sleeps-all-day, minion-of-Satan aspect of their relationship. They (and all of the myriad bizarre, odd, or just plain weird folks who pop up in this book) are just regular, recognizable folks, trying to make it day to day. They just have to do it in much stranger surroundings than most of us.

The pace of the book is lightning fast, and Moore is extremely adept at juggling his largish cast of characters. It's rare for any characters to overstay their welcome; you move on too quickly to get bored. The characters themselves are sharply etched. Moore has a gift for delineating even incidental, nameless characters with a few deft strokes.

Moore combines a fast-paced plot, hilariously wacky characters, and a touch of blood and melancholy and comes up with a thoroughly enjoyable postmodern vampire tale. Which is really just a high-falutin' way of saying Bloodsucking Fiends is a fine and very funny book, and I think you'll like it, if you give it a try. show less

Review posted 8/12/2011 at EARphoria.

Hilarious! I actually read this book last summer. At the time, I planned to review it along with the two following it together, but I never finished the third one. I decided to listen to the first two before I got to the third one, as a memory refresher. After A Dirty Job, I was ready to listen to anything by Moore on audio. That's why I declared him this month's author spotlight.

I really do love this series. The characters are hilarious. I love Tommy and Jody individually, but definitely together. Tommy is adorable and insecure. He's such a beta male (like Charlie in A Dirty Job). Jody is just bad ass after she becomes a vampire. I like that she's older than Tommy. It makes for a really funny show more dynamic between the two of them.

Another thing that makes me love this series: the Animals! Those guys are so funny. The best group of guy friends ever. They're always getting into hysterical trouble. I remember some of the things that happen in the next book, and I can't wait for more of their shenanigans. Also, I can't wait for Abby Normal.

Susan Bennett did a pretty good job with the narration. She has a pretty good delivery. I wasn't crazy about her voice for Rivera. He's sounds Russian or something... which he isn't. In fact, I've always imagined him having an American accent. I guess I just assume he grew up in the city.

Great book for a laugh, and it really takes the vampire trend and makes fun of everything it can. Highly recommended.

Prude Filter: This book contains profanity, mild violence, sexual content, and references to necrophilia. show less