Emma Brocke's mother, Paula, had hinted at a troubled past but never quite got round to filling in the details. When Paula died Brocke felt the need to discover what her mother had not managed to tell her. She travels to South Africa, where Paula grew up until leaving for England in her early 20s. She delves into archives, and meets relatives whom she has mostly only heard of.

The process of her investigation is engaging, and the story she gradually uncovers is pretty fascinating, though very disturbing. The book is also interesting for its perspective on both Apartheid era and post-Apartheid South Africa, from the perspective of Brocke's white South African family.

I was quite pleased that there wasn't too much of Brocke herself in the book. In fact much of her own life is elided, so that visits to South Africa that are months apart almost run together.

She paints her South African family in vivid colours - you can really feel their struggle to transcend their traumatic family history, and their small everyday victories in having survived, though none of them are unscathed. But overall, this is a touching and evocative paean to Brocke's mother, who is painted most vividly of all. ( )

memoir (sort of)/abusive childhood. kind of meandering--interwoven with personal stories from relatives as the author uncovers the truth of her mother's life before her. ( )

I got this book as part of the mumsnet giveaway and I was glad for otherwise, I don't think I would have picked it up.
The subject matter is about childhood abuse and hence the apprehension about what I was going to read. It is very well written though and Brockes' style is quite compelling, so much that I could easily get through it in a day (despite an inquisitive toddler and a demanding 3 year old daughter!).

However, the story itself is a disturbing one and I found myself squirming at what to expect.

Brockes has handled it very well, by talking about her mother's quirks and behaviour and then slowly edging into her past and her family. I found myself smiling at her mum's disapproval of "Britishness" and enjoyed the description of many of her behavioural traits as Brockes acquaints her her mother to the reader.

It is after her mum's death when Brockes decides to delve into her mother's past that I found myself bracing for the worst. It was no secret what she was going to reveal, for there are hints all over the place about abuse. Maybe it was my frame of mind or the fact that I have two young children of my own and hence the hypersenstivity to child abuse, I don't know.

But apart from that, the subject matter is very well handled especially the impact of abuse on the children, how the trial was their ordeal by fire and its subsequent effect on them as adults.

At one point though, as the story wore on, I couldn't help wondering if I was reading a travelogue or a memoir when Brockes describes the a victim of mugging incident in South Africa.

Anyways, the last few pages, the court statements really got to me and that was the point when I felt that I had enough.

But perhaps that is the strength of the book. To be able to evoke extreme emotions so much that it stayed with me even after I closed the book. ( )

I read this for book club. It is not something I would have picked up on my own. While a fast read, the book was in serious need of a good editor. It jumped around and repeated a lot. I've read other books about similar "family secrets" and felt that this one just didn't hit the mark in terms of depth. ( )

Brockes' mother Pauline left South Africa as a young woman and it is not until Brockes is an adult and her mother has died that she finds out the full story of her mother's family. In some ways, this is an incredibly disturbing book - Pauline's father was a violent and sexually abusive alchoholic and the stories about him are truly horrific. But it is just as much about the ability to create a life worth living out even out of the most difficult of surroundings. Also, Brockes has a very light touch - I found myself laughing a number of times, though granted the hunour was very dark.

It's amazing what people live through.

An excellent book. ( )