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What My Mother Gave Me: Thirty-one Women on the Gifts That Mattered Most

by Elizabeth Benedict (Editor)

Other authors: Elizabeth Benedict (Contributor), Eleanor Clift (Contributor), Lillian Daniel (Contributor), Rita Dove (Contributor), Mary Gordon (Contributor)26 more, Ann Hood (Contributor), Margo Jefferson (Contributor), Karen Karbo (Contributor), Sheila Kohler (Contributor), Jean Hanff Korelitz (Contributor), Caroline Leavitt (Contributor), Elinor Lipman (Contributor), Dahlia Lithwick (Contributor), Martha McPhee (Contributor), Mameve Medwed (Contributor), Mary Morris (Contributor), Cecilia Muñoz (Contributor), Maud Newton (Contributor), Joyce Carol Oates (Contributor), Judith Hillman Paterson (Contributor), Marge Piercy (Contributor), Abigail Pogrebin (Contributor), Katha Pollitt (Contributor), Luanne Rice (Contributor), Roxana Robinson (Contributor), Elissa Schappell (Contributor), Lisa See (Contributor), Charlotte Silver (Contributor), Susan Stamberg (Contributor), Emma Straub (Contributor), Cheryl Pearl Sucher (Contributor)

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9618284,510 (3.88)6
Essays by women of gifts from their mothers that has touched her to the bone and served as a model, a metaphor, or a touchstone in her own life. Individually, the stories get to the heart of their mother-daughter relationship. Collectively, the pieces have a force that feels as elemental as the tides.… (more)
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Showing 1-5 of 18 (next | show all)
What My Mother Gave Me completely blew off all my windows and doors. It's not just that it made me think about the many things, tangible and intangible, that my mother (who has been gone now for 4 years) gave me, although it did do that. It's that the voices of the writers who contributed to its pages made me think about the many and varied ways there are to be a woman. All of these writers, and certainly their many mothers, have lived rich and fascinating lives. Whether I felt kinship with them over the things their mothers gave them that mattered most or not, it was a privilege to get each woman's take on this most pivotal relationship and to catch glimpses of so many different kinds of women's lives.

I finished reading What My Mother Gave Me in a fancy hotel room with a balcony overlooking the sea. My urge to come back to this east coast beach town--a place my family and I went to for the first and last time a little over three years ago to mark the first anniversary of my mother's death--grew and grew as I read. So, when the opportunity presented itself to dash off here for a couple of days, I jumped at the chance. My mother was never in this town or at this hotel that I know of, but we scattered my father's, my brother's, and, finally, her own ashes in the sea as each of them died because that way, by her reckoning, "whenever you're near the water, you're close to the person who died." That idea was foreign to me when she first proposed it when my father died many years ago, and, as a lifelong lover of cemeteries (So peaceful! So quiet! So sad!), I wasn't sure I agreed. As with so many other things, though, she was right. My mother gave me lots of things and ideas that matter more than I ever would have guessed they would at the times she gave them, but that one may be the one that matters most. That, and knowing to always go to a fancy hotel by the sea when you want to, even if you can't really afford it and common wisdom would say that you shouldn't. "You deserve it," was one of my mother's favorite refrains, and also, "Je ne regrette rien." Thanks, Mom! ( )
  CaitlinMcC | Jul 11, 2021 |
This review was written for LibraryThing Early Reviewers.
One of the best books I have received as part of the Early Reviewers program of LibraryThing. I enjoyed it so much. The essays are stand-alone stories from women-- all writers-- who received widely varied gifts from their mothers, and discuss this gift. It made me think about all the gifts my own mother has given me over the decades, both tangible and otherwise. Maybe not to read this if your mother has recently passed. Otherwise, I plain liked this book and would recommend it to any daughter. ( )
  kschloss | Mar 22, 2016 |
This review was written for LibraryThing Early Reviewers.
I tried reading this a few times... tried to like it... and I just couldn't. One or two stories I read seemed more snarky and "I hate my mother" more than anything else.Seriously put me off from the rest of the book.
  songbirdz | Feb 4, 2014 |
This review was written for LibraryThing Early Reviewers.
Although this collection of essays about mothers came out in time for Mother’s Day, What My Mother Gave Me would make a great gift any time of year for a mom who likes to read. The essays are all by adult daughters who are also well-known writers – novelists, journalists, essayists, and short story authors– most of whose names you will probably recognize. With 31 essays in all, there isn’t a dud in the bunch, although some will resonate more with different readers than others.
Some of the mother-daughter relationships described in What My Mother Gave Me were unhappy, and some of the mothers were sick for years or died young, but each writer describes something her mother gave her that is meaningful and that she is glad to have. Readers of writers’ memoirs might especially enjoy glimpses into the lives of these women during formative periods or their reflections on their own mothers’ lives from the vantage point of being their mothers’ ages themselves.
For longer review, visit the Bay State Reader's Advisory blog. ( )
  baystateRA | Aug 26, 2013 |
This book came just in time for Mother’s Day 2013. It’s a collection of short stories/essays written by 31 different female authors. Some of them are well known, others, not as much. The theme? They wrote about the one thing that their Mom had given them with the most meaning or long-lasting impression.

As a reader, I truly believe that investing a little time to understand the background, education, life experiences, and childhood of an author would greatly improve my reading experience. When I saw the names of several authors I know, I thought this book would be a great supplement for my books. I also predicted that this would be an inspirational and uplifting easy read. After all, who else could influence us as much, or as positively as our Mother does?

I was quite wrong.

It was a shock to discover that not all stories were positive or easy to read. Some authors downright hate their Moms, or lack mothering there of. The “gift” their talked about were not all tangible as well, although most were. They varied from tangible: a nail polish, a photograph, a part of their home, an outfit; to intangible ones: memories, pain, love of words, a day’s experience. The essays also varied from pleasant to down right painful to read, from eloquent to mediocre. Some realized their Mothers loved them right there and then, others, years later. The essays definitely covered all sort of Mothers and daughters, some good, some not so good….just like in real life. A few stories I definitely had fond memories of even a few weeks after reading the book: A Thousand Words a Day and One Charming Note by Lisa See; The Missing Photograph by Caroline Leavitt. The introduction by Elizabeth Benedict was quite emotional to read as well.

Since the chapters are divided by authors and their piece. One can read this book all in one sitting, or divide them up and read one or a few at a time. I highly recommend this book to all who want to study the complex mother/daughter relationship, or just as a simple gift for a Mom or a daughter.

I received the ARC from NetGalley…and later purchased a copy as a Mother’s Day gift for my best friend, who has a “it’s complicated” relationship with her Mom.

( )
  lovestampmom | Aug 8, 2013 |
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» Add other authors

Author nameRoleType of authorWork?Status
Benedict, ElizabethEditorprimary authorall editionsconfirmed
Benedict, ElizabethContributorsecondary authorall editionsconfirmed
Clift, EleanorContributorsecondary authorall editionsconfirmed
Daniel, LillianContributorsecondary authorall editionsconfirmed
Dove, RitaContributorsecondary authorall editionsconfirmed
Gordon, MaryContributorsecondary authorall editionsconfirmed
Hood, AnnContributorsecondary authorall editionsconfirmed
Jefferson, MargoContributorsecondary authorall editionsconfirmed
Karbo, KarenContributorsecondary authorall editionsconfirmed
Kohler, SheilaContributorsecondary authorall editionsconfirmed
Korelitz, Jean HanffContributorsecondary authorall editionsconfirmed
Leavitt, CarolineContributorsecondary authorall editionsconfirmed
Lipman, ElinorContributorsecondary authorall editionsconfirmed
Lithwick, DahliaContributorsecondary authorall editionsconfirmed
McPhee, MarthaContributorsecondary authorall editionsconfirmed
Medwed, MameveContributorsecondary authorall editionsconfirmed
Morris, MaryContributorsecondary authorall editionsconfirmed
Muñoz, CeciliaContributorsecondary authorall editionsconfirmed
Newton, MaudContributorsecondary authorall editionsconfirmed
Oates, Joyce CarolContributorsecondary authorall editionsconfirmed
Paterson, Judith HillmanContributorsecondary authorall editionsconfirmed
Piercy, MargeContributorsecondary authorall editionsconfirmed
Pogrebin, AbigailContributorsecondary authorall editionsconfirmed
Pollitt, KathaContributorsecondary authorall editionsconfirmed
Rice, LuanneContributorsecondary authorall editionsconfirmed
Robinson, RoxanaContributorsecondary authorall editionsconfirmed
Schappell, ElissaContributorsecondary authorall editionsconfirmed
See, LisaContributorsecondary authorall editionsconfirmed
Silver, CharlotteContributorsecondary authorall editionsconfirmed
Stamberg, SusanContributorsecondary authorall editionsconfirmed
Straub, EmmaContributorsecondary authorall editionsconfirmed
Sucher, Cheryl PearlContributorsecondary authorall editionsconfirmed
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Essays by women of gifts from their mothers that has touched her to the bone and served as a model, a metaphor, or a touchstone in her own life. Individually, the stories get to the heart of their mother-daughter relationship. Collectively, the pieces have a force that feels as elemental as the tides.

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