Heartless

The Queen of Hearts was not always so heartless…

Lady Catherine Pinkerton dreams of opening a bakery with her business-minded maid as her partner, and maybe finding romance with the yellow-eyed boy she keeps dreaming about. But her parents have other plans for her: marrying the King of Hearts.

There’s a Jabberwock on the loose, an intriguing new court joker at the palace, a suspicious pumpkin-farmer, and mad tea parties with magical hats — Catherine thinks there just might be a chance for her to get her wish after all! But when all her plans keep crumbling around her, how long can she hold onto hope before her dreams die, and her heart along with them?

This was such a good take on the playful weirdness of Wonderland! There was just show more the right balance between whimsy and mayhem, and cohesive plot and characters. Even though I knew it couldn’t end well for Catherine, I still found myself hoping along with her that things would turn out better, and somehow the ending didn’t feel as pointless as it could have considering the main character doesn’t get what she wanted for the whole story. There’s mystery, romance, adventure, and all sorts of Wonderland strangeness — a highly entertaining read! show less

“Off with his head”

This book was a delight! I loved the madness in it and only wish there had more (c’mon this is Wonderland after all). Given the premise of the book I knew it couldn’t end well especially when Catherine seemed like a perfectly normal and nice girl. Obviously, something bad was going to happen to spur her into becoming the Queen of Hearts that is known for beheading people.

Likes:
-The presence and reference of many already known Wonderland characters. I mean this was to be expected but I truly adored it!! The Cheshire Cat, The Mad Hatter, the March Hare, etc.
-JEST! I adored him completely and was perhaps my favorite part. He was fun and sweet and come on who doesn’t like a guy who can make you laugh.
-The show more food. God, the food. I swear I was hungry all the time from the descriptions. And it was nice to see the main character have a solid interest and goal.
-The authors interpretations for why the Queen of Hearts hates white roses. MY HEART.

Dislikes:
-Catherine. *sigh* Okay. I don’t necessarily dislike her ; I just found some of her choices to be quite idiotic. She could have made different choices?? Things didn’t have to play out that way?? Like when her parents tried to force her to marry the King or else they were going to disown her I was like “Girl. LEAVE. Go find Jest and go f*ck off somewhere. I know you’re used to this life, but I’m sure you and your boy can find a way to survive elsewhere. Like isn’t he a ROOK where he’s from? Come on.”
-The pacing. Mmkay, sooo... while I really enjoyed the book the beginning felt a little slow to me and then the ending felt REALLY rushed. I swear I had whiplash.
-Needs more madness!

Overall: A very enjoyable book! Perfect for someone who enjoys Alice in Wonderland though not without it’s faults and you may face palm occasionally over Catherine’s decisions. show less

Wow. Gosh. I don't know why I was expecting some twist happy ending?? There is not one. Ha.

A nicely written piece of feminist literature. Yes, I say "feminist literature" here with my whole chest. I'm tired of fantasy and romance typically being discounted as "literature." This contains themes of whether it's possible to avoid fate and prophecy, what freedom of women's choice does for society, and the potentially lasting effects of headstrong decisions or assurance of one believing they know what is "right." Also, Marissa Meyer is the queen of the fairytale retold, to a point that deserves some serious literary recognition. Her ability to alter and twist stories into mosaics of the original is astounding.

There is one reason for each show more docked 1/2 star. First off, objectively speaking, there were far too many things left unexplained. What about the Red and White queens?? Why were we not even given a glimpse of Chess and how that world works before any further exploration became impossible? And the dreams? Huh? I still don't know what was happening with the lemon trees and roses. I also felt that the surprise reveal at the end about Hatta being in love with Jest was half-baked at best. I think that was a really interesting plot point that went underserved. Second, subjectively, I hate unhappy endings. Bittersweet? Cool. Unhappy? No. So it just wasn't my cup of tea. Cath (name by the way? What editor allowed a nickname that sounds like it could be short for "catheter"?!) is not a character I like very much, either. She makes what are, in my opinion, stupid decisions, often without thinking about consequences. show less

Whimsical and tragic, an inspired origin story for the Queen of Hearts.

(Full disclosure: I received an electronic ARC for review through NetGalley.)

She would be queen, and queens … queens did not open bakeries with their best friends. Queens did not gossip with half-invisible cats. Queens did not have dreams of yellow-eyed boys and wake up with lemon trees over their beds.

###

The Fox folded her hands and recited,
One to be a murderer, the other to be martyred,
One to be a monarch, the other to go mad.

###

Was he mad already? She couldn’t help inspecting him, newly speculative and curious. He didn’t seem mad. No more mad than anyone else she knew. No more mad than she was herself. They were all a little mad, if one was to be show more forthright.

###

Lady Catherine Pinkerton is in love ... with baked goods.

The kitchen is her sanctuary: a refuge from a hyper-critical, socially ambitious mother; a meek father; and all the expectations that come with her social status - learning embroidery, attending balls, hanging out with the haughty best friend she can hardly stand. There's nothing she enjoys more than dusting powdered sugar on a recently cooled lemon tart, or kneading bread dough until she's ready to drop. She loves eating sweets, and sharing them with others: what quicker way to a stranger's heart than through her stomach?

Cath dreams of opening a bakery with her best friend/family servant (one of several), Mary Anne. Mr. Caterpillar the cobbler is set to retire, leaving his storefront vacant, and its busy location would make the perfect home for SWEETS AND TARTS: THE MOST WONDROUS BAKERY IN ALL OF HEARTS.

Though her dream is almost adorable in its simplicity, the obstacles that stand in Cath's way are anything but. As the only daughter of the Marquess and Marchioness of Rock Turtle Cove, Cath is its sole heir. Baking is considered unladylike - at least for ladies belonging to the royal class - and besides, she's expected to marry and have children. In fact, her scheming mother has one particularly illustrious suitor in mind: the King of Hearts. He's a nice enough guy, but fifteen years Cath's senior, rather silly and daft - and baby-crazy, to boot.

The arrival of the King's new Joker - on the night he's set to propose to Cath, nonetheless - only complicates matters further. A mysterious man who makes the impossible possible, with eyes the "color of sunflowers and butterscotch and lemons hanging heavy on their boughs" and dark, curly hair, Jest is the man of Cath's dreams. Literally: she was chasing him the night her dreams grew a lemon tree over her bed. The very same tree that bore the lemons she used to make the tarts she baked for her King/future husband. (Maybe.) Oh, what a fantastic mess!

And then there's the Jabberwock that seemingly crawled right out of myth and rumor to wreak havoc on the Kingdom of Hearts. The spineless King won't do anything to stop the creature, which only makes Cath dislike him more. Can she slay the dragon, deny the King, run away with the boy, have her cake and eat it too - all with her reputation and head (or is that heart?) intact?

I'll be honest: I was a little nervous to read Heartless. Marissa Meyer made a total fangirl out of me with The Lunar Chronicles series, and this should have been a no-brainer. But I'm partial to scifi over fantasy, and my knowledge of Alice in Wonderland is mostly limited to the animated 1951 film by Disney, which I enjoyed as a child. I wasn't sure I knew/remembered enough about the books to fully appreciate an origin story for the Queen of Hearts.

And perhaps this is true, but I loved it just the same. Meyer's writing is brimming with humor and whimsy, but with a hint of pathos and tragedy that takes quite the turn near the story's end. You can almost imagine her channeling the spirit of Lewis Carroll; the setting, dialogue, and magic of the source material are all present and accounted for. She even borrows from a second author: the raven from Edgar Allen Poe's "Nevermore." It's hard to choose just a few favorite elements; there are so many wonderful and unexpected touches. But I have a soft spot for the Raven, who speaks in rhyme - and wields an axe in his human(ish) form.

Other things I loved, in no particular order:

- Lady Catherine, who is sweet and kind and ambitious - yet also a little too eager to please her parents. She's flawed and complicated and surprisingly relatable, considering the outlandish villain she's fated to become.

- Jest, who's hecka swoon-worthy. His magical jester's hat and sidekick, Raven, are just the beginning: he's dreamy and mysterious, clever like whoah, and nimble like an acrobat. Plus he can vanish in swirl of feathers, or tunnel through the earth. Talk about a man of many talents.

- Cath + Jest. The two have a textbook's worth of chemistry, and you can't help but root for their romance - even when we learn that Jest has An Agenda, and despite the fact that it's doomed from the start.

- ALL THE FOOD TALK. From lemon tarts to rose macarons, freshly baked bread to treacle-bourbon-pecan pie, Heartless will have you salivating through the tears/despite your horror.

- I especially love that Catherine is a gal who enjoys food in every way - baking, feasting, inventing, sharing - even while Proper Society (as represented by her mother) admonishes her for her passions. The Marchioness constantly puts Catherine down: calling her an elephant or walrus, forcing her to fit into a gown several sizes too small for her, even restricting her food intake. Yet Jest rebukes this narrow image of femininity time and again. Likewise, baking is reaffirmed as Cath's chief talent when she's forced to perform at Hatta's tea party - and it's arguably the reason the King is drawn to her so. Three cheers for the lady's appetites, okay?!

- Hatta’s Marvelous Millinery Fine Hats and Headdresses for Distinguished Ladies and Gentlemen. ("No longer does a hat complete an outfit—now it completes you.") I think I'd quite fancy a macaron hat myself.

- Peter Peter pumpkin eater! 'Nuff said, because spoilers.

- The Roxanne-esque courtship of Cath by the King (with a little help from Jest).

- Household objects come to life (the hotheaded candle, the sleepy cuckoo clock); animals that are very weird literal interpretations of their names (construction-minded carpenter ants; racing seahorses); all the punny stuff (Sturgeons who are surgeons).

- The Sisters, who are creepy as all get out and could use a story of their own. Also I really want to know what they did with that heart.

- Lion. Poor, brave lion! (Yes, I cried a little. Okay a lot.)

- A woman dragonslayer, the only one worthy of the Vorpal Sword.

- The allusion to multiverses.

- The scenes when Cath loses it with Margaret and her parents at the end. Honestly? I cheered. It was a long time coming and thus deeply satisfying, even if it marked Cath's descent into evil.

In summary, this is one weird and wonderful book. While reading, I was just overcome with the feeling that Meyer must have had a darn fun time writing it. It's definitely a fun read, offset by the odd moments of worry and doom and inevitability. Meyer does a masterful job of humanizing a rather flamboyantly cruel villain, and imagining how she might have come to be this way.

Heartless is a must read for Alice in Wonderland fans, Marissa Meyer fangirls, and anyone who enjoys the genre more broadly. All the hearts.

http://www.easyvegan.info/2016/11/21/heartless-by-marissa-meyer/ show less

A retelling of Alice in Wonderland, of sorts, in which we get the tragic backstory of the Queen of Hearts.

(Warning: Sort of spoilers ahead, but also sort of not, if you know the original tale.)

Okay. So. I loved it. And I also completely loathed it. It's well imagined and just as well written. But the love story is also incredibly angsty and frustrated and frustrating. But hating the ending is sort of on me because knowing what the Queen of Hearts is like in the original and knowing this is her back story should have clued me into the fact that this book wasn't going to end happy at all and yet here we are with me absolutely fuming because I have to be sad that the love kiddos didn't actually end up beating the odds but honestly why not show more rewrite the story and make it happy, Marissa? Who hurt you, Meyer? Why are you like this?! This will likely be my last of her work because my poor little heart can't take it. show less

This was the cutest/most poignant fairy tale retelling of the red queen’s story from Alice in Wonderland. I adore fairy tale retellings, and Marissa Meyer is the master of putting a cute twist on things while retaining traditional elements. Catherine wants to shrug off her gentry upbringing and use her dowry to open a bakery. And geez, you will want to make sure to stop at the grocery store or bake up some of your favorite treats before starting this one because OMG delicious food porn on every page. I think I gained five pounds reading it, and it was SO GOOD, LOL.

Unfortunately, Cath’s parents want to marry her off, and the (adorkable, but not at all desirable) king has his eye on her for a bride. She meets the intriguing court show more jester and for the first time, feels something that could be love. Jest was an amazing character, and as always, Marissa Meyer can spin an amazing tale. I loved all the side characters to pieces, and the plot was well done. I will say that this is not a pick-me-upper like her previous books… you might hope MAYBE things could turn out okay… that she’ll put a twist on things and somehow there will be an okay ending? But no, true love does not triumph and in the last few chapters, our main characters are left dead/heartbroken/shattered and it’s a total downer. So, you know. Fairytales! This happens! But maybe not the thing to read if you’re having a bad day or require happy endings. It did make it not quite as much of a beloved book compared to her Lunar chronicles series. Overall, this was a complex and fun story that kept me turning the page.

Please excuse typos/name misspellings. Entered on screen reader. show less

Great mash up of magical world, (Alice in Wonderland world), romance, and the "origin story" for the Queen of Hearts - oh my gosh, Meyer knows how to weave a complex, layered plot with great character development, sophisticated precise prose and an emerging heroine in Lady Catherine Pinkerton... very quickly drew me in once the atmosphere-setting building was established. This is one normal/weird medieval style place called "Hearts".... as the story builds more and more of Lewis Carroll's Alice in Wonderland strange genius emerges. At this, Meyer is a master- loved it- but she's totally capable of building multi-faceted minor characters who are alternately worthy of readers' sympathies and fear! She knows how to write a slow burning show more romance too - oh my!! Hope lots of my YA readers will give it a try - she's definitely going to be a hit for Cavalcade of Authors! show less