Finding Jake

Finding Jake by Bryan Reardon is a 2015 William Morrow publication.

“Why are you sad?”

“You need to be more outgoing.

“You need to be more of team player.”

“You should get out more.”

Promoted as a book written in the vein of “We Need to Talk about Kevin” and “Defending Jacob”, I will lay you odds, that most people picked this book up because they believed the sole focus of the novel was about the gut-wrenching possibility by a couple that their child could be involved in a mass shooting. Yes, that is what this book is about, and it’s disturbing on so many levels, and is a scathing look at American society as we know it today.

School shootings have become a paralyzing fear for parents in the times we live in. In show more such cases, we immediately cast stones at the shooter’s family, blaming them for not seeing it coming, for not doing something to prevent it. How could they not know?

This is a theme that runs throughout this book, with people hurting on a level I can’t begin to absorb, trying to deal with the emotional trauma associated with the unthinkable loss of a child.

To lose a child is almost more than one could bear, but to lose them in such a horrifying way, would rip you apart heart and soul, but what if your child was a suspect? Can you even begin to imagine such a scenario?

The reader follows the first person narrative of Simon Connolly, a stay at home dad, as he faces, not only a parent’s worst nightmare, but one in which his beloved son, Jake, is possibly involved in a mass shooting at his school.

As his shocked mind attempts to digest the situation, he and his wife, Rachel, and daughter, Laney, must deal with the utter agony of not knowing where their son is, if he is injured, running scared, or dead, not to mention trying to cope with the accusations thrown at him.

As events unfold in the three- day period of time after the shooting, Simon begins to reflect back on his parenting skills, Jake’s quiet personality, parent-teacher conferences, the struggles of being a stay at home dad, before it was an accepted practice, and the divide his marriage was suffering from. He doubts every move he has made as a dad, what he should have done or shouldn’t have done. He is consumed by so much fear, and worry, he begins to lose faith, with so many seeds of doubt being planted about his son.

Everything about Simon and Rachel was so spot on, they could have been any couple in America, but they were also a couple who went against the grain. They did not always conform to the parenting rules set by others in their neighborhood or by teachers at the school their children attended.

Simon was a stay at home dad, Rachel the breadwinner, with a high stress occupation that demanded a lot of her time.

The author did an incredible job of showing the judgment passed on Simon by other men, how hard he was on his own self, how he coped with watching his wife live a life so separate from his that resentment formed deep within his heart, and he was often unfair to her.

I approved of the author’s depiction of ‘role reversal’, showing that raising decent human beings is hard work no matter who is home with the kids. While it is a luxury many would love to afford, it also has its challenges and is much harder than you know.

But, since Simon was the most hands on parent, his self- recriminations show the difficulties of having a child that is not like all the other children in temperament, as he chides himself, second guesses everything as places entirely too much blame on himself.

By contrast, Rachel deals with a different level of stress and is perhaps a little tougher, but would trade places with Simon in a heartbeat.

They may not have been perfect, but they were a couple many will find themselves relating to.

But, the underlying theme that many may not pick up on, at least not right way, is that being an introvert does not make one a criminal, insane, weird, untrustworthy, or stuck-up. Because Jake was quiet, didn’t engage with his classmates in the way our society expects, he was immediately a suspect. Because he tried to be nice to everyone, even those who were hard to like, even when they made him uncomfortable, he didn’t follow the crowd in making fun, or bullying, he was thus deemed guilty by association.

“Our culture made a virtue of living only as extroverts. We discouraged the inner journey, the quest for a center. So we lost our center and have to find it again.” ~Anais Nin

This novel paints a fairly accurate view of American society. Follow along with the crowd, and you will not be suspected of a heinous crime. Join the playdate club, rub elbows with the right people, be outgoing, gregarious, loud, talk all the time, constantly surrounded by people, always attend social gatherings, look just like everyone else, talk like everyone else, do the same things everyone else does, because if you don’t, you may find yourself labeled as being weird or antisocial.

“Growing up, it all seems so one-sided
Opinions all provided
The future pre-decided
Detached and subdivided
In the mass-production zone

Nowhere is the dreamer
Or the misfit so alone”

Conform or be cast out….

(SUBDIVISIONS BY RUSH)

While the book is most assuredly a psychological thriller with the suspense becoming almost unbearable, so taut I could barely breath at times, it is also a cautionary tale, one that highlights our hypocrisy, that points a finger at society, and gives the introverted soul a slap on the back, and the permission to give society the cold shoulder without being punished for it.

Simon and Rachel give us something to think hard about, because how often do we take life’s dull routines for granted, allow the small things to come between us, forget to count our blessings, or just live in the moment?

Simon may beat himself up forevermore, always worry endlessly, but despite their foibles and flaws, this family has so very much to be proud of setting such an outstanding example for us all.

It’s okay for you to view this book solely as a work of suspense, or as a thriller, because it is that, and if you understand why book’s conclusion is considered inspirational, then that is all I could hope for.

But for some who are extreme introverts like me…

This book touched me on many levels and while I am not usually a weeper, I cried the ugly cry, as I felt so connected to this struggling family, and saw a strength in them, they never knew they had, which gives me hope, though the lesson here is so very hard.

But, I for one came away with a feeling of vindication so profound I can’t thank this author enough for not only having the courage to write about such a difficult topic, but to also take a stand and fight for all the Jake’s in this world, and hopefully, his message was heard loud and clear.

“Everyone shines, given the right lighting.” ~Susan Cain show less

3.5/5 We've all read the horrendous stories and watched the news footage - shootings at schools....

Bryan Reardon's new novel, Finding Jake uses a school shooting as a starting point for his book.

Simon is a stay at home dad to Laney and Jake, while his wife heads out to her job as a lawyer each day. One fateful day, there is a shooting at the children's high school. Simon rushes to the school and anxiously waits to be reunited with his kids. Laney is fine, but Simon is the last parent waiting - and Jake is the only child missing. The suspected shooter was a loner, with Jake being his only friend.

Simon has had many doubts about his parenting skills over the years. He found it hard to mix in with the stay at home moms in the neighbourhood. show more He projected many of his own fears and insecurities on his children. Laney seemed to be unaffected, but Jake is a quiet child, preferring his own company.

As he waits for new, Simon relives Jake's life - from a baby to the young man he is today. And Simon's doubts, questions, self-recriminations, fears and anxieties about himself, his role as a parent, his childrearing abilities and his son are laid bare on the page. How well does he know his child? Where is Jake? His body was not inside the school - where could he be? Is he alive? Could he possibly be involved? What more could he have to protect his child? What did he do wrong?

Everything we learn is from Simon's point of view. It is as much a search for who is son his as it is a self exploration of himself as a father, husband and person. Despite his self realization, I found it hard to like Simon. As Simon's memories progress through the years, the picture we have of Jake changes. The ending was not at all predictable, though unsettling.

I found the back and forth between the past and present quite addictive. Reardon's prose have such a ring of authenticity to them - he eloquently articulates the fears we all harbour as parents. Reardon himself left an office job to stay home with his twin newborns. show less

Finding Jake by Bryan Reardon is a suspense-laden and emotion-filled novel that is every parents' worst nightmare: a shooting at your child's school. What makes the story so compelling are several unanswered questions: the fate of a missing student, his involvement (if any) in the shooting and how well do parents really know their children. There are several other fascinating elements to the storyline that are also quite thought-provoking but discovering the answers to these three questions is what I found most riveting.

Simon Connolly is a stay at home dad who has always worried about his two kids, Jake and Laney. He agonizes over the smallest details of his parenting but in the aftermath of the school shooting, he cannot help but show more obsess over whether he made the right decisions for both kids, but Jake in particular. When the parents of the students begin to learn the fate of their children, Simon is the last parent to receive information about Jake, but he is left reeling at the news that Jake is a suspect in the shooting and that he is, in fact, missing. His son's connection to the troubled suspect is tenuous but police immediately focus on Jake as a co-conspirator and Simon is left wondering if he overlooked signs that Jake is capable of committing such a heinous act of violence.

Simon is panicked from the first notification that there is trouble at the school and he remains that way for much of the novel. He flashes back to different moments in Jake's childhood and the picture of a quiet, shy, introverted child quickly emerges. Simon wonders if he imparted the right lessons to his son and if he made the right choices during pivotal moments of Jake's childhood. While Simon's wife and daughter never doubt Jake's innocence, Simon is plagued with misgivings and uncertainties that cloud his judgment in several instances. In a moment of startling clarity, Simon finally puts the pieces of the puzzle together and he is nearly shattered by his subsequent discovery.

School shootings are particularly horrifying crimes and it is easy to make snap judgments and leap to conclusions in an effort to understand the incomprehensible. Friends and neighbors are the first to point fingers and distance themselves from the alleged perpetrators. There is intense pressure on law enforcement to provide answers and reassure the public that they have solved the crime. Parents are easy to blame when their child misbehaves and in a school shooting, it becomes imperative to assign responsibility and parents are often burdened with guilt and their decisions are closely scrutinized. Each of these topics are realistically explored in Finding Jake and the reactions of the various characters ring true.

Finding Jake by Bryan Reardon is an incredibly well-written novel that is poignant, tragic and ultimately, quite moving. An absolutely absorbing read that is incredibly relevant in today's world and one that I highly recommend. show less

Advance warning: This is not a light read, but it is a good one. It centers around the titular Jake, who is missing after a school shooting. The police and neighbors seem to instantly think the worst of Jake, and thus are searching for him as a suspect, not a boy in need of help. But the narrator, Simon, Jake's father (a stay-at-home-dad), is determined to find Jake and help him, whatever he needs.

The story goes back and forth in time, from before Jake was born, when Simon and his wife decided she would go back to work and he would stay at home to take care of their children, to right before the shooting, to after the tragic event. Through this device, Reardon really allows his readers to get to know Jake, Simon, and their family show more outside of the high-stakes of the present-day events.

Reardon tackles some very heavy topics-violence, what causes it, modern-day witch hunts, innate personalities, parenting, gender roles, and moral codes-and handles them well. Finding Jake gets its point across without being heavy handed or preachy, and is a suspenseful, haunting read. show less

I have to give this 5 stars. It was an excellent portrayal of what a family goes thru after the unthinkable happens. Simon Connolly is a stay at home dad. He has been the primary caregiver to his son Jake and daughter Laney. Rachel, his wife, a corporate attorney has been the main breadwinner. Simon Connolly is no different from any parent. He worries about his kids, 2nd guesses his decisions, relives his responses to his children's actions - always critiquing how he is reactions, responses and comments are shaping his children's future as well as confirming to himself that his kids are normal. Jake is like him when he was a kid, and still as an adult, he doesn't like crowds... he wasn't into neighborhood playdates. Then the unthinkable show more happens, a shooting at his kid's high school. He rushing to the scene like all the other parents, waiting at St. Michael's for the police to answer their questions and to reunite with their children. Hundreds of parents dwindles to 10's then to only a few remain. Simon is finally faced with the reality that his life will never be the same. This is a very emotional heart wrenching book. It makes you take pause to how you may react under such circumstances and how the media frenzy alone can enrage a community, a nation and trigger copycats - Simon & Rachel Connolly can be me, you or your neighbor - we wouldn't want to wish this nightmare on our worst of enemies. Well Told! show less

Finding Jake by Bryan Reardon is a very highly recommended, compelling novel about a family tragedy.

Suburban Delaware father, Simon Connelly, has been a stay-at-home dad for their children, Jake, 17, and Laney, 14, while his wife, Rachel, goes off to work at her corporate law office. When Simon receives the message: "Shots have been fired at the high school. Calmly report to St. Michael's across Route 5." Like almost any other parent in this situation, Simon knows: "It is not until I see other cars, driving as recklessly as my own, that I begin to understand. There has been a shooting at my kids' school. My kids, Laney and Jake, are at the school. My kids are in danger. I am not afraid. I am not worried. I am protective, animalistic in show more my instincts. I will do anything to keep my children out of danger. I will die to protect them. This is not bravado. It is simple fact." He takes off for the high school and joins the other frantic parents waiting to hear of their children are safe.

When Rachel joins him and together they see that Laney is safe, Simon begins to understand that Jake is missing - and even though they can't find him, the police think he was helping the known shooter, Doug. Other parents begin to shy away from them and the accusations and recriminations quickly follow as news crews move in to cover the story. Simon reflects, "My thoughts trip and stumble. I am packing to leave my house, which is in the process of being searched because the police think my son shot thirteen kids today."

Simon, who has always felt insecure and wondered what role his decision to be a stay-at-home dad along with his own social awkwardness may have affected his children, reflects on Jake's life and the choices he made when Jake was younger. Chapters alternated between the present day and the past. We follow the current heart-breaking events along with the reflections on the past.
It becomes clear that both Simon and Rachel have had difficulties and struggles maintaining their marriage during this time they have held nontraditional parental/societal roles. But as we watch Jake grow up and how Simon handled parenting it also seems clear that no matter how much he questions himself and wonders if Jake could really be involved, that Simon is a good parent.

Reardon does a great job building suspense. I appreciated the format, with alternating chapters between the present and the past. Any parent wonders and reflects about how decisions they have made when their children were young may have influenced how they when grown. A tragic event would make this self-introspection even more acute. The format also serves to heighten the suspense.

Although comparisons are made between Finding Jake and We Need To Talk About Kevin, I found that the comparisons can only be made in the broad sense of the basic subject matter. Both novels are about a parent reflecting on their roles in their child's development, but not in the content of that introspection. To say much more would be a spoiler, but while vaguely similar, they are also very different novels.

Disclosure: My Kindle edition was courtesy of HarperCollins for review purposes. show less

Finding Jake by: Bryan Reardon
Reviewed by PnJbookreview 02/16/2016

Imagine, you are at work, home, in the grocery store, just going about your day. It’s been an especially pleasant and warm day in November, your day is like every other day. For 16 years you have stayed at home, raised your children in a loving and happy home. Everything is going just how you planned it and you are comfortable in your middle class life living in the suburbs and are proud of who you are, and where your life has gone. Neighbors wave at one another and kids build tree houses in the woods and play instead of being on the television all day. You feel your phone vibrate. You sigh and think I wonder who needs what now. You pull the phone from your pocket and show more feel the warmth of it in your hand, and then your blood runs cold when you read the words “THERE’S BEEN A SHOOTING AT THE SCHOOL. YOU NEED TO COME NOW!” Every parent’s nightmare.
Told from the point of view of a father who received that text, and all the earthshaking aftermath that occurs afterwards. The torment of rushing to the school where everything is blocked off, and being escorted to church to sit, and wait. Wait for news, wait as you see the body bags coming out of the school. Waiting for an absolution that may never come. This is the ride you sign up for as you embark on the journey with Simon, Jake’s father, as he searches for any clue as to what could be happening, and most importantly as he searches for Jake.
This brilliantly written suspense/ thriller novel brings about the question, how well do we really know anybody? The journey you join with Simon is a long an emotionally charged road. While you travel this road, think back, what was the last thing you said to your child? What were they wearing? This is the agony of the journey Simon is on, and we can only tag along and wait with him. Where is Jake?
The author, Bryan Reardon, was a freelance writer for a bit, and co-wrote a few novels and then worked in the government. His degree in psychology made this novel an intense journey for those brave enough to read along.
I read lots of genres of books and have written many reviews, but never has a book held me just as captive as Simon. The road is rough, there are lots of bumps along the way as he guides you through this terrible tragedy and is trying hard to get us all home. I most definitely would recommend this book to readers of all genres as well. In its own way this book was more intense than any thriller I’ve read, kept me hidden under the covers reading furiously with my heart beat slamming more so than the last horror novel I read. This also showed me kindness and redemption.
Go on, go purchase Finding Jake by Bryan Reardon. You won’t regret it. Amazingly powerful book!
~ J show less