A Father's Story

Going into a book like this, it's very easy to cast judgment. The impulse is to critique the parent and think "If I was in his shoes, I would have done better." I went into reading this trying very hard to avoid this kind of thinking, but I have to say, Lionel Dahmer makes it difficult. I did finish the book with the opinion that Lionel could have done much more to prevent what happened, but the reason for my relatively low rating has more to do with the following:

A recurring focus is on Lionel's own childhood problems, and what he perceives as the darker side of his own person. The overwhelming implication is the argument of nature over nurture; that genetics had more to say about they "why" of Jeffrey Dahmer than environment. I find show more that position difficult to swallow considering the details Lionel offered about Jeffrey's upbringing. These details don't look great, and they're the ones Lionel offered. Who knows what was omitted or distorted.

An example: Lionel describes Jeffrey's abandonment issues. He then goes on to examine -- not the fact that he was distant for much of Jeffrey's life, and clearly contributed to those issues -- but the fact that Lionel _also_ experienced abandonment issues as a child.

The most interesting parts for me were the facts of what it was like to interact with Jeffrey at various stages of his life prior to the murders. These details were few and left me feeling disappointed. On the whole (and of course with some exceptions) the book reads like an extended self-defense tactfully disguised as a sincere introspection. show less

I found this book really interesting for many reasons. First, it gives you a different perspective on Jeffrey Dahmer as a person. Traditional sources paint him as a mentally damaged monster without any explanation of his psyche. This book presents him in a much more human light and it also tries to trace the reasons he did what he did. Then, it also gives you a very good idea of the repercussions his crimes had on his family. Moreover, the book paints a realistic picture on society and how it very often fails those who need help. Last, but not least, if you are a parent, you may find some good advice on how not to treat your children and how childhood can affect future life. Lionel Dahmer also touches the subject of heredity although show more not in a scientific way. I am not really sure how heredity could have affected his son's behavior, I think in this case it was much more the way he was treated and neglected than heredity that contributed to the crimes he committed. Anyways, the book was worth my time. show less

Lionel Dahmer delves into his own life and psyche and tries to explain to the public and himself how his son Jeffrey Dahmer - the notorious serial killer who was caught and imprisoned in 1991 - turned from loving son to gruesome murderer. He psychoanalyzes himself and tries to pinpoint the traits in himself that turned so wrong in his son. This is the second time that I've read this book and I give it an A+!

Although the crimes that led to the writing of this book are horrendous it is an honest insight of a father and his family trying to come to terms with their worst nightmare. One cannot fail to be moved.