Alexandra Stoddard

In this highly self-centered book, Alexandra Stoddard gives all kinds of advice about how to live an enjoyable life. It's too bad that most of it runs along the lines of, "Have a friend bring you some piñon incense from Santa Fe to burn in your fireplace. Once you do, you'll be hooked" (p. 13). The privilege and smug self-satisfaction are palpable...as is the author's perfect and complete unawareness of them.

I'm sorry for you if you are Stoddard's personal friend because she will be happy show more to use your imperfections to set off her own impeccable taste and style. In one passage she tells of her benighted friend who was so unorganized that she had three address books. Stoddard rushes to the rescue, with her recommendation for the very best filing system. Her friend responds with fawning appreciation; her life is now livable thanks to Stoddard's favorite planner pages.

There are many instances like this where Stoddard draws attention to her own style by using her so-called friends as a foil, but another deserves to be quoted in full:

"I will never forget going to a friend's house for dinner many years ago. We were served creamed chicken, mashed potatoes, and canned creamed corn. This colorless menu was unrelieved by being served on a beige plate! A sprig of parsley, even some cranberry jelly, would have whet my appetite. It takes a great deal to make me lose it, but that night even my imagination failed me. Dinner was so dull. I couldn't taste anything at all" (p. 70).

Oh, the horror! A friend invites you over, prepares dinner for you, but fails to make it colorful! Can anyone imagine a worse fate? Of course it takes a "great deal" to upset Stoddard's inner peace, but this colorless meal was most certainly beyond the pale of what any mortal should be forced to endure.

I recently reread The Pilgrim's Regress by C. S. Lewis and Stoddard is undoubtedly of the school of Mr. Sensible, whose advice on the art of happiness consists of "be in good health and have enough money to live comfortably" (my paraphrase). There are no words of advice for anyone who is not so happily circumstanced; Mr. Sensible, and Alexandra Stoddard, have nothing but a blank stare for anyone who does not share their affluence.

This is the worst book I have read this year and I can't believe no one at the publisher tried to tone back its unrelenting narcissism. Awful. show less

The book, Gift of a Letter, by Alexandra Stoddard, provides a timeless analysis of the value of hand-written communication for both the writer and the recipient. She intimately describes the value of a letter in revealing deep truth and loving thoughts and compares letter writing to "sending your ship out." as the vulnerability and permanence are fixed. She encourages leaving the misspelled words, cross-outs, and additional expressions of truths because a letter written from the heart, i.e., show more a “spontaneous letter,” is an “extraordinary gift.” She further reports that a correspondence with, “… only one line is sufficient.”

Ms Stoddard refers to and quotes many famous letter writers including Samuel Johnson, Abraham Lincoln, Elizabeth Barrett, E.B.White, etc.; provides appendix listing famous letters she has enjoyed; and warmly discusses the writings of Virginia Wolf throughout the book. She states that, “Surely letter writing must be a part of the pursuit of happiness.”

Who can deny the pleasure of receiving a hand written correspondence from someone you personally know even if it says only, “I’m thinking about you...” Ms Stoddard challenges, “dare to begin,” “it is never too late,” that “no news is not good news,” and provides advice concerning how and what to write including comments concerning quality of hand writing.

I recommend this book for any wondering about taking up the valuable habit of letter-writing. Letters allow you to purposefully communicate your true intent and may be read and re-read by the recipients at their leisure. This is an easy and educational read. show less

This is not a How-To book in any way. The author goes back and forth between one voice of hippy-dippy advice on ""decorating in a more organic way to live life to its fullest"" and another voice of ""ottomans must be exactly three inches shorter than your sofa or else."" She also states that you should install a certain kind of lighting or paint in a certain style, but never details how it should be done.

I did enjoy the ""hippy-dippy"" parts and felt that they were nearly the only redeeming show more quality of this book. It should also be noted that this book was published in the early 90's, so a lot of her decorating tips are seriously outdated. She mentions that you should buy a telephone with a 10 foot cord so as not to limit your range of motion in the kitchen. Ha! She also mentions decorating around your VCR. What is *that*?! Besides the outdated technology aspects, she also mentions chintz, pastels, and wicker nearly every other sentence. Ick!

A distracting aspect of this book was an odd sprinkling of quotations having hardly any relevance to the main points placed on the sidelines of almost every page. I have no idea why these were included. The book has no photos, but there are some lovely black and white illustrations by Stephen Freeburg placed throughout.

Overall, the author's voice is like your kind-hearted aunt who is so rich that she is just out of touch with how the rest of us commoners live. For me, a ""hall"" is not a grand room that you can fit a kitchen table in- it is a narrow corridor attaching my 3 small bedrooms. Also, my master bedroom is not large enough to fit a love seat, a coffee table, and some end tables in for a sitting area. The fact that she thinks everyone's houses are this spacious is a little bizarre. She seems like a sweet version of Hyacinth ""Bouquet"" Bucket from BBC's "Keeping Up Appearances." show less

This is the book that influenced me to acquire a multitude of "Penpals", back in the days before e-mail when I was in grade school. I corresponded with people from all over the world, mostly kids but also a few adults and even one convict... There was a worldwide culture of penpals who would send each other "FBs" or Friendship Books (sort of like a chainmail message board). Each person added their address and interests to the FB, and you could correspond with any of them.

With the advent of show more e-mail letter writing has taken a new turn. Though we don't send as many "real" letters, we actually correspond more virtually. This book can inspire "virtual" letter writers, just as it recalls the joy of receiving a "traditional" epistle.

Stoddard offers many inspiring tips on letter composition as well as the nuts and bolts (stationery, supplies, etc.) One of my favorite suggestions is to carry a stack of postcards with you and jot down quick notes to friends when you have a few minutes of free or "waiting" time during the day.

Just flipping through this book inspires me.... enough reviewing, I'll go write a letter! show less