Carlos Hernandez (1)

Schneiderman and Hernandez know that all collaborations between two authors necessarily become a triangulation, a tritons genus. Emerging from this collaboration is the production of that third thing, the sense of the synthesis itself (without being Hegelian since it is not a question of Aufhebung- the raising and preserving into the new product). As if to assign some measure of control over their cooperative act of genesis, they name this third mind "Fex". And, like atomic Adams or show more contemporary Raymond Lullys, they perform this by the recombinant strains of orthographs. The authorial egos are dissolved and then reformed, much akin to Fex' new alphabet, into the gleaming superego of Fex himself.
If one were to consider this an alchemical experiment, one would doubtless have to involve Borges "The Library of Babel", Deleuze's "l'abecedaire", and bpNichol's "The Alphabet Game". Perhaps even a cross-reading with Anatole France's The Garden of Epicurus could inspire some dangerous liaisons and frightful hybridization of/for thought. But is there a story, some kind of sequential plot that one can follow through this labyrinthine text? No, there is not a plot, but a multiplicity, and it takes acute vision to juggle the carnivalesque episodes that mashes together and makes for a divergent run. Without a healthy appetite for narrative play that grounds and undoes its own literary methodology, the Abecedarium will just seem like some stochastic, incoherent jumble of absurdist wank - not that either Schneiderman or Hernandez would be much put out with such a derogatory claim since such censure-happy critics would be just as quick to denounce the literary precedent for this book such as Breton, Pynchon, Acker, et al.
Since the reading and reviewing of a book cannot be dissociated from certain anecdotal asides (at least not in good faith), I read this book through once, and then play it like a ritornello, and although I cannot make any such claims of largesse to state that I "get" the book, the trick is this: to "get" the book, you have to "not get" this book. I do not mean keep your dollars in your wallet and run for the nearest Clive Cussler potboiler, but rather: buy the book and actually enjoy "not getting" it, since comprehension of this "novel" only works when said comprehension breaks down. Admittedly, this is not much of a sales pitch, and far be it from me to shill a book that can quite manageably shill itself. What is there not to like in its many non-revelatory palimpsests? Heroic Fex with shades of Bob Dobbs rescuing the French from the Nazis...Surely this jams history with an overabundance of irreverent and irrelevant detail as each "chapter" seems to pivot on the red herring theme of a carnival dragon (no fooling).
Deleuze used to say that the way he did philosophy was through a kind of buggery: that is, he would take a philosopher in history "from behind" and force said philosopher to produce monstrous new offspring. In fact, that is exactly what he did alongside his collaborator, Felix Guattari. My own interpretive imposition upon this Abecedarium makes it difficult for me not to see Schneiderman and Hernandez as literary equivalents of Deleuze and Guattari.
Yet again we return to that nagging and perennial question of what this book is about. If we were to hazard to assign the term postmodern to it, we'd find the text far too wet for such a label to hold. Besides, that tricky "post" prefix tacked on to everything from post-historical to post-neo-anything is about as welcome as being cornered by the fatuous self-important pseudo-cultural socialite at the cocktail party who wants desperately for you to see how droll she is. Any description would by necessity fail to gain purchase on this book, and this is some lazy copout performed by this reviewer, but rather the undeniable fact that a detail of the plot is a meaningless enterprise that consigns the book to being a story rather than a textual event.
Teeming with feverish neologisms, clever portmanteaus, this quasi-surrealist tablature honours and defeats its own promise of laying down the foundation for an entirely new alphabet. Coquettish in parts, inflammatory in others, this is an unapologetic collaboration couched in a svelte volume of prose-poetic dissonance. show less

I heard that this book was good, but I didn't expect to like it -- I've read several Riordan/Riordan presents titles, and while I am totally behind them as a genre, they generally just don't do much for me. (I can't explain it). This, on the the other hand, this book! Is. A. Delight. To. My. Soul. It is so funny and so genuine and so heartwarming and so ridiculous and so full of sorrow and mystery and death and calm, funny reactions. It's like a freaking manual for Self Care SEL and how to show more manipulate adults by being excessively polite and OH MY GOD is that refreshing. I love the Gabi Dads, I love American StepMom, I love Sal and Gabi and I particularly adore the Entropy sweeper. Eleventy million thumbs up for the audio book narrator, who does an amazing job, and honestly, if anything in this review is off-putting to you, put the review down, call me names, and go pick up the book. It will make you feel better. SO GOOD. Are there more stars? Can I give it more stars? It's Murderbot good. It's Inspector Gamache good. It's verging on....yes, I think it's Terry Pratchett good. I'm telling you, this book is fantastic. show less

I will flail about this duology forever.

There are a rare number of books that, if you read them aloud to your family, will make you feel clever, hilarious, and kind, all that at the same time. These two books are at the top of that list.

I loved this just as much as the first volume. We got to spend more time with Gabi's seven dads, we get entirely correct lectures on why empanadas are the perfect food (there is SO MUCH FOOD LOVE in this book. Not just describing food in a mouth-watering show more way, but as culturally important, and the preparation of food as an act of love, especially the done inclusively of special dietary needs (Sal is diabetic)), more smart-aleck HIs, more careful empathy around hard topics like bullying, abuse, and grief.

I have such big feelings about the gift that Carlos Hernandez is. I will recommend these books forever. show less

Hard to believe it's only been about three weeks...but Sal and Gabi are off on a new mission. Sal's Papi and Gabi's Dad: The Final Frontier believe they can use the remembranation machine to fix all the holes in the universe - but a Gabi from another universe slips through to warn them that some holes must stay open (the membrane must remain permeable, like a cell). "FixGabi" wants to go too far in the other direction, however, and get rid of the membrane completely.

Meanwhile, at Culeco, show more parent-teacher conference night approaches, along with the "Rompenoche" performance - this year, a version of Alice in Wonderland. Unfortunately, the performance is terrible (the costumes, however, are brilliant). Can Sal and Gabi save the show and the universe? (Yes, yes they can. With plenty of humor and slang and slight-of-hand along the way. Oh, and they help their friend Yasmany too. And there's a class-9 AI toilet named Voragine. Of course.)

Quotes

Hope is the thing you lose right before you lose everything else. (54)

[Adam] told jokes mostly to make himself laugh. That was a sign of someone who gives feero zucks about what other people think. And that made him someone I could work with. (92)

I think part of me was secretly hoping that, if I ran fast enough, I could even outrun my maturity, which was spoiling more and more of my fun every day. (110)

"But how are we supposed to function in a universe of contradictions?!"
"We learn everything we can. We take action. But we pay attention to the consequences of our actions. That leads to better actions in the future." (151)

I was starting to think that every solution I came up with created a worse problem than the previous problem. (163)

"What if I could give you irrefutable proof right now that I'm right? Would you change your mind? Just like that, this very second?"
"Yes," said Papi, looking surprised that I would even have to ask. "I'm a scientist. When better proof comes along, I change my beliefs to fit the best evidence. Anything less would be illogical and unethical." (292)

"Like the actors at Renaissance faires...They're always in character, but they make up their lines to fit the situation." (interactive site-specific theater, 320)

"It's evidence of a sophisticated mind, not being afraid of weird things." (Gabi to Sal, 340)

Adults out there, listen up: Kids hear better than you do. If you can hear it, so can we, and if you can't hear it, we probably can anyway. (364)

"The most good, for the most people, for as long as you have the spoons." (Gabi to Sal, 369)

"What you're saying that is, in life, sometimes the wrong person wins."
"Sometimes it feels like the wrong person is always winning." (Gabi and Sal, 372) show less