Matthew McKay

This is not a book to read; it is a book to work. I have worked through this book with a counselor for many months now, and I can honestly say it has changed the course of my life.

Since childhood, I have struggled with low self-esteem. I have a Ph.D. in physics, a good job, and a loving wife. However, I still said to myself on a daily basis, "I am a failure." "It is all my fault." "It is only a matter of time before they find out I am not as good as they think I am." "I don't understand why show more she is still with me." Working through this book with my counselor has been the most important part of breaking out of these lies about myself.

This is not easy work, but it is worthwhile, and I would recommended to anyone whose head is echoing with the same self-hating lies. show less

What I’ve noticed is that good couple skills usually come down to the small stuff: listening without interrupting, sharing chores fairly, and not turning every disagreement into a big event. In my own life, the moments that helped most were simple things like making tea after a long day or asking, “How was your day?” and actually waiting for the answer. I also looked at megapersonals reviews https://megapersonals.pissedconsumer.com/review.html while thinking about how different people show more approach relationships. To me, making a relationship work is less about perfection and more about showing up consistently, even on ordinary days. show less

What I learned from this book:

1. If I have low self-esteem it is all my parents’ fault.
2. We are all valuable because we are alive and we just are trying to survive and doing the best we can. (Yeah, tell that to Ayn Rand.)
3. We can enhance our self-esteem through powerful visualization techniques, like visualizing ourselves getting out of bed or eating a sandwich. Ooh, that’ll work!
3. Self-hypnosis is easy and fun!
4. There is no such thing as good or bad or right or wrong. No one can be show more blamed or judged for anything they do or fail to do. “[P]eople always act according to their prevailing awareness, needs, and values. Even the terrorist planting bombs to hurt the innocent is making a decision based on his or her highest good.” Awesome. We can all be totally selfish and do whatever we want even if it results in the death of other people, as long as we feel good about ourselves while doing it!
5. I pretty much stopped listening after #4. What crock of bantha poodoo.
6. Oh, yeah, one more important thing: A major drawback of reading e-books is the inability to fling a book across the room with great force when it makes you as angry as #4 made me. show less

Acceptance and Commitment Therapy for Interpersonal Problems: Using Mindfulness, Acceptance, and Schema Awareness to Change Interpersonal Behaviors
by Matt McKay, PhD. 12/22/22 reviewed

Why I picked this book up: being more interested in getting useful therapy skills from these topics.

Thoughts: I found this book useful from these two perspectives that were simple, useful and easily understandable with many examples and coping behaviors. In short, none of the current treatment approaches for show more interpersonal problems adequately target all aspects driving maladaptive coping behaviors. The innovative combination of ACT with a schema-based approach allows for a well-rounded treatment protocol that addresses all of the essential criteria. To be clear, this is an ACT treatment. It doesn’t use any schema therapy techniques; schemas are utilized solely for the purpose of identifying clients’ primary pain. The goal of this approach is not to change clients’ schemas or core beliefs; rather, the goal is to help them accept the primary pain associated with their schemas and assist them in improving behavioral flexibility in order to enhance values-based living.”

Why I finished this read: it offered easy to follow and important ways to use them. I finished because there was many useful therapy sections to explore

Stars rating: 4/5 stars show less