TPBM 90 - If this was degrees, everything would be south of here

TPBM will tell us the name of a poem s/he has committed to memory.
(It's okay if you've forgotten it; just, at some time in your life, you could recite it.)

TPBM will tell us the name of a poem s/he has committed to memory.
(It's okay if you've forgotten it; just, at some time in your life, you could recite it.)

Annabel Lee by Edgar Allan Poe. I think it was one of the very first English poems I read.

TPBM thinks it's worth while to continue this topic.

Henry King - who chewed string and was early cut off in Dreadful Agonies, one among several of Hilaire Belloc's Cautionary Tales. Perfect recitation material.

TPBM regularly declaims stuff.

I don't declaim it, but it was the first thing that came up when I read your post, abbotthomas -

Celery raw develops the jaw
Celery stewed is more quietly chewed
----Ogden Nash

TPBM likes humorous poetry.

You mean like this?

My Not So Private Pain
by Mike Lynch
Copyright 2010

I had ten weeks of forewarning, but it wasn’t enough
For nothing can prepare one, no matter how tough
For the offense to the senses, I cannot conceal
When she brought to our home - the damn cockatiel.

She named it Carlisle, from the vamp in the book
But they had nothing in common, ‘cept that baleful look.
As it went for my jugular, sharp beak like a hook,
I grabbed it with one hand; with the other I shook
A meat cleaver. My wife screamed “What's the big deal?
It’s only a baby! My poor cockatiel.”

“Only a baby!” I said with a cry,
If I hadn’t stopped it, I’d be missing an eye!”
It broke loose from my grip, and flew on to my head.
I put down the blade and swatted instead
For that nasty young bird had grown so much bolder
It had crapped on my head, and on my left shoulder.

I loved my wife dearly, but she’d quickly discover
The blame for this bird that I held above her
The blame, I mean, not the bird did I hold
“Take it back to Hell, from where it was sold.
Take it back there right now. Heed my appeal.
Free us from this damn cockatiel.”

It clawed up the furniture and since that wasn’t enough
It went for my arm and other soft stuff
Then the antique rocker, just recently oiled
Its dustless and shiny look forever despoiled
By bits of feather case and dander unreal
Released in huge lots by accursed cockatiel.

It’s been two years now that the beast’s been around.
Too large to fly, it struts on the ground
But never in a straight line, and each time I’ve grinned
From the thought of it blown by Santa Anna Wind
Just an inch above the floor the wind does it push
That monstrous abomination by its sorry-assed tush.

It eyes me with suspicion as it stands there and feeds
On millet and walnuts and costly bird seed.
Plaster of Paris mixed in with its meal
Would put an end to the damned, infernal, accursed, abominable, intolerable, destructive, annoying, pestilence of a cockatiel.

Silly can also be quite serious, you know.

TPBM has another example.

I have one by Shel Silverstein that I bet is a favorite among Republicans. I'm a liberal -- the poem is where we can meet on common ground.

There are too many kids in this tub.
There are too many elbows to scrub.
I just washed a behind
That I'm sure wasn't mine;
There are too many kids in this tub.

TPBM remembers a poem from childhood that has adult implications and will now recite it for us.

No, these days, I'm not good at reciting things, or remembering things for that matter. Besides, >7 Limelite: you already took the one I could definitely recite. Love that poem and Shel Silverstein books. Over the years I tried to keep copies of some of his poetry books on my shelves for nieces and nephews when they visited, but they loved them so much I ended up giving up several copies. I might still have one or two.

TPBM would give this book ____________out to everyone if they could.

War and Peace. That ought to keep the blisters quiet for a while.

TPBM would hand out otherwise.

//>4 abbottthomas: Remember this, from 2010? Poor old Boo, sorry to see her go.

Lettie, when a little child, drove her parents nearly wild
So they sent her, every day, to her grandma’s house to stay.
She found the regime rather tough and having had more than enough
Followed Granny round and round, keeping quiet without a sound
Until the dear old lady went into a closet where she bent
Over to pick up a shoe and then what did little Lettie do?
She slammed the door and wedged the handle
Poor Grandma didn’t have a candle and so was stuck there in the dark
With nasty spiders – what a lark!

She begged and pleaded, "Lettie! Out!"
Be nice and let's not have a rout!
Think of all I'm to do today!
Pay the bills and pour Da's stout.
But I can't, nothing, nada, nay
locked in a closet and not to pray."
When mom returned as mother's must,
Lettie's stock fell flat on trust,
Grandma cast her churlish pearl,
now Lettie's the poor matchstick girl.//

>10 SomeGuyInVirginia: //I'd forgotten that ('though not Boo) - thanks for the reminder ;-)//

To improve the general moral tone, Great Expectations. Sort of a course in what it means to be human.

TPBM knows what rhymes with 'rejoinder'.

Umm, knee pointer? de-coined her?

TPBM thinks I've pretty much covered it.

Yup >13 WholeHouseLibrary: that more than covers it, but it begs the question why a 'certain person' is writing poetry on Govermint time.

TPBM will offer their thoughts on either poetry or Government.

Yes to both! Neither are currently in fashion.

//No gubmint job heah, although I work with gubmint types. No revenuers!//

TPBM will elevate the tone.

I would, but I don't know how to change the font to falsetto.

TPBM can't wait for Beethoven's birthday to arrive -- just 8 days!

With all respect to L v B, I admire his
music, but canʻt spare the time to spend
looking forward to his birthday.

TPBM celebrates Buddhaʻs Birthday (today?)

Well, now I am!

TPBM celebrated Cinco de Mayo.

Not sure why anyone would celebrate a ship's cargo of condiments dropping into Davey Jone's Locker, but who am I to judge?

TPBM revels in small details.

Well, the short answer is 'no', and the long answer is 'nnoooooooooo'. Granted, they can't be ignored, either.

If TPBM were a hispter, he or she would give ________ as a replacement for the traditional holiday fruitcake.

Well if I were a hipster, and I was going to give food, I'd definitely give something made with quinoa, probably something vegan, and organic. If I were giving books they would be about Bob Dylan or Patti Smith. If I would give clothing it would probably be something with a cat in big glasses on it.

TPBM knows a hipster or is one.

Also maybe something vintage from the area thrift store.

I am not now, nor have I even been, a hipster. AKA, Starbucks Gypsy. BUT, if I were a hipster looking for a cool substitute for fruitcake, I'd give actual fruitcake sure in the knowledge they'd pick up on the irony.

TPBM is doing SantaThing.

I am!

// Call me crazy but I love fruitcake :-) Feel free to re-gift your traditional holiday fruitcake to me! //

TPBM is also doing SantaThing.

Yes! And I'm so excited because I didn't think I would be able to (finally started to recover from financial setbacks in the fall), but a fellow LTer donated a spot for me! This community is awesome.

TPBM agrees.

Absolutely! And it's why I'm back after a two-year hiatus. Well, that, plus conditions were right.

TPBM can touch the tip of his/her nose with his/her tongue.

This person can touch the tip of her nose with his tongue but it is rarely accepted with enthusiasm. The other thing, I cannot do, but then, I never feel the need to.

TPBM has some bodily idiosyncrasy that they feel like sharing.

My whole body is idiosyncratic. In short, I'm an idiot who never recognizes my reflection in a store window because I assume I look like everyone else.

TPBM looks like a TV model while brushing their teeth in the AM.

If that model is over sixty, has thin, undyed hair, and never wears makeup, sure!

TPBM brushes their teeth at night.

Every stinking one of them -- twenty-seven in all, three of which are crowns. Where's the twenty-eighth, you might ask. Never had it. I've always had just three teeth between the lower canines. I swoon when I think about all the time and toothpaste I've saved not having that extra tooth to bother with.

TPBM also has a biological oddity that can be discussed among refined associates.

>23 Jenni_Canuck: //I'm another one of those crazy people that loves fruitcake. My only complaint about it is that since mom and the older female relatives don't do the crazy baking for Christmas anymore, I have to make do with the mass produced stuff, and they all have way too much nuts in them.//

No, but I can tell you guys. When I'm under water and I pinch my nose closed I can make tiny air bubbles come out of my eye. I don't do it often because it totally weirds me out.

TPBM is odd too.

I'm even odder.

TPBM knows the odds.

I know most of you pretty well. I think some are odder than others, but hey, that's what makes it interesting.

TPBM would rather ________than spend an evening with a boring person.

Blow eye-bubbles - but it's a very close run thing.

TPBM is never bored.

You're never alone when you're schizophrenic.

TPBM has a deep, abiding interest in __________, as well as books and reading.

Dirt.

TPBM is fascinated by _________________.

the idea of blowing eye bubbles. Larry, you da man!

TPBM is ambidextrous.

If that means equally uncoordinated with both hands, then yes.

TPBM can pick objects off the floor with one's feet.

Occasionally. Depends on the object.

TPBM is thinking, TMI...

The Most Interesting people play TPBM.

The person below me has an interest in _______.

Why my retirement plan lacks interest???

TPBM has won the lottery (more than $100).

Not yet.

//I have this picture of tiny bubbles leaking from my iris. It's all about phrasing.//

TPBM is experiencing technical difficulty.

Ack, as SGiV says - lept.
Yes I am - in trying to speak to Technical Support.

//Naw, that is too high a threshold for me and eye-bubble blowers.//

TPBM has an ambition to achieve a new _____

winning lottery ticket! (I need a better retirement plan)

TPBM dreams of ______________

A little elf coming into my kitchen in the middle of the night and baking holiday cookies and then sneaking upstairs and wrapping gifts.

TPBM knows where to find this elf.

You may need two elves! I LOVE wrapping gifts so I could wrap yours but you'll have to find another elf to do the baking.

TPBM is planning to be lazy this weekend.

Nope, I'll be working on a customer's project (two t-shirt quilts for her kids). Will try to get some reading in, though.

TPBM manages their time well.

Well, maybe ...

TPBM is signing up for LT's Holiday Card Exchange.

Nyet! I haven't even got my own cards out yet.

TPBM is ahead of the game.

Yes. I leave all that sort of thing to SWMBO.

TPBM finished cards, decoration and shopping (which I often think is the true 'reason fer the season') ages ago.

Yeah ... not gonna happen. This is the year of the long, lean holiday-that-isn't.
We spent more than we earned (for the year) back in August, and that's about half of our current outstanding bills.

Despite that, MrsHouseLibrary dropped $100 on a tree -- a gorgeous tree, but my Festivus Pole cost us absolutely nothing. So, no gift exchange, but my sons are coming over next Friday morning for the traditional Taylor Ham, Swiss-cheese, and egg on an English Muffin breakfast.

Axial tilt is the reason for the season. Any sixth-grader could explain that to you.

TPBM is already fed up with the holiday tunes playing everywhere.

Not really. I've always liked Christmas music (mostly traditional stuff). However, the day after Christmas I am soooo over it.

//>46 Jenni_Canuck: Okay this is great. When do you think you can finish up?

TPBM wants the list to end.

Not now when we have Jenni to wrap packages!

TPBM has a unique holiday tradition.

// >52 morningwalker: and >53 SomeGuyInVirginia: Are you bringing the packages to me or me to the packages? *note to self: get passport renewed, just in case ... * //

Trying to keep daughter, mother of four, from losing her cool after midnight Christmas Eve. She always has more stuff to do and less reserves to draw on. It would be funny if it weren't so awful.

TPBM will be serving _____________ at midnight.

The sandman, if I'm lucky.

//>54 Jenni_Canuck: I'm pretty sure >53 SomeGuyInVirginia: said he was paying your way for you do wrapping for both of us.//

TPBM lost their list.

Nyet! I use phone apps available across devices, so the list is always with me. I still haven't found a scheduling app that I really like, though. Low tech rules!

//>54 Jenni_Canuck: Wait! What?! I called Santa, he'll pick you up at 3:18pm on Christmas Eve.//

TPBM has an app for that.

Unfortunately I have decided that I hate Google enough to not download any more apps to my cellphone because of the new terms..... we'll see how long that lasts but so far I've got everything I need.

Dratted Google. I don't even "Google" things, I "Ixquick" them.

TPBM doesn't mind Google at all.

It does loom a bit, like Microsoft used to, but no, I use it a lot. Watch for the drone delivery ...

//Jenn - do remember that SGiV is gonna be in the "Islands" for Christmas. Don't wait up for Santa. Although, to be fair, the ticket he bought me to pop-down and visit him was first class and had Limo service both ends.//

TPBM ,like me both distrusts and abhors, FB.

Yuppers! That's me. I don't even tweet.
Damn shame that marketing is what drives all these social media platforms. If I could be assured that no information about me would be sold for marketing purposes, I'd be on it in a heartbeat, but it all comes down to money and greed.

TPBM can state that more eloquently than I did.

No, I just tend to swear.

TPBM will tweet the revolution.

Sorry, I'm not a tweeter. But we do need a revolution.

TPBM will be the tweeter to unite the masses.

I don't tweet but I have been getting unsolicited emails telling me what is 'trending' on FaceBook. If the subjects are representative of the concerns of the masses then I have to believe that the masses are united in idiocy and triviality with a seasoning of prurience and malice. Rather as Juvenal wrote: Duas tantum res anxius optat, panem et circenses.

TPBM might reassure me that I have it all wrong.

I might, but then I'd be lying.

TPBM is as truthful as George Washington.

I cannot tell a lie. The butler did it.

TPBM is more likely to suspect Col. Green in the kitchen with the lead pipe.

// >58 karenmarie: What new terms? //

// >59 John_Vaughan: and >60 WholeHouseLibrary: You must be talking about me. . . the confirmed electronic Luddite //

Not me! I'm into candle sticks!

TPBM has another one that is preferred!

Ms. Scarlet, with the Dagger (We had a self made game with, mini lego puppets and playmobil weapons), and of course in the Library

TPBM knows where the hidden passage is

What hidden passage?

TPBM will provide safe passage.

The passage was safer before the dragon moved in. On the positive side, the place is much warmer now.

TPBM looks at the bright side.

Well, yeah! It's too dark to look anywhere else!

TPBM looks forward to ________.

About everything, really. Kind of a great time to be alive.

TPBM is secure in the knowledge of _________.

Death and taxes. It's good to be certain some things never change, even if those things suck.

TPBM uses this adage _________________ a lot.

Whenever anyone asks, I reply, "I've been married to Lime Spouse since God wore diapers." I'm Southern. We tend to exaggerate.

TPBM always exxxxaggerates when telling someone about _________________.

Hyperbole. (It's the best thing ever!)

TPBM knows a sure-fire way to stop the mind from revving into overdrive when it should be preparing itself for sleep -- and will tell me what it is.

(If my brain had wings, I'd be approaching the far reaches of the stratosphere.)

I make alphabetical lists of books, authors, or characters in my head.

TPBM has a different method.

Counting backwards from 1000 while alphabetizing state names. . . .

TPBM method is much easier!!

Yep. I count backwards from 100. Got to 79 last night.

TPBM sleeps like a baby.

It depends. One of the parking lots for my complex is right under my bedroom window, along with several access hatches to storage/utility rooms in the basement. So, I get days when I'll sleep soundly and straight thru to when the alarm goes off, other days I may get woken up at least once because of noise. I got woken up less often when I lived in the house because my immediate neighbors knew I worked night shift, so they made an effort to keep the noise down during the day.

TPBM enjoys napping.

Yes, especially in the company of a cat.

The person below me has a story about a bureaucratic mix-up making their airline look helpful. (The registrar's office at school has been a piece of work lately.)

Not sure if it makes the grade, but I'll try.
True story: I was named after a pre-deceased sibling. He happened to have the same medical issue I have, only worse, and died as an infant. But my parents liked name, so they recycled it. He was #2 of 10 children my parents had; I was #5. Well, being the pathological Catholics that we were, every anniversary of a relative's death, we'd go visit the grave, and all the other graves of our relatives -- convenient, because most of them were all buried in the same cemetery. So, my siblings would always point out that I was already there, or I'm next, and it always bothered me. So, from very early on, I asked that I'd be called by my nickname (Mike), rather than my given/recycled name (Michael). Everyone else was called by their nicknames. but my wish wasn't respected, because, well, they knew it was a source of irritation.

So, I'm going to now skip over the details of the problems of other people I've had encounters with who also had the same name as me -- over a hundred -- except to mention that it took over two years and a lawyer to get the seven points assigned to my driver's record expunged for the traffic violation committed by another ~me~ who also share my birth date, physical description, date-of-driver's-test, and issued the same driver's license number.

I'm also going to skip the skirmishes I had with family members during the family reunion we had (in Ireland) two summers ago. But, those experiences annealed my resolve to give them absolutely reason, other than their desire to be jerks, to address me as Michael. Last September, I legally changed my name to just Mike Lynch -- no middle initial even. I scanned in a signed copy of the court order and sent it to my family. Some of them actually got the message.

So, I told you all of that to tell you this: I had to then notify everyone I did business with, and government agencies, that I've had this name change. And it's been a smooth transition, except for certain aspects of my bank. I had the name changed on my credit cards -- one is through my bank. I had new checks issued, but I pay almost all my bills through online banking. I've had all my accounts updated a year ago, but last week I got a replacement credit card (has a chip in it) and it had Michael on it. I get email notices from the bank, and they begin with "Dear Michael". They claim they can't find where it's coming from. I'm thinking about changing to a different bank.

TPBM has a doppelganger.

One for sure, in Los Angeles in the early 1970s when I was going to college. People kept swearing they saw me places I knew I hadn't been.

And, here, at work, there is a woman similar enough to me (height, er, girth, hair length/general color, glasses, etc.) that people frequently call her Karen and call me Barbara. Doppelganger-ish.

TPBM doesn't think record-setting high temperatures at Christmas feels right.

No indeed. Here in Surrey it is just about shirt-sleeve order. I would much rather have a crisp chill with morning frosts. I'll pass on the snow, though.

TPBM will accept my best wishes for Christmas (or whatever name they prefer for the season) and pass them on.

Absolutely. Although, strictly speaking, I am not a Christian, I happily celebrate Christmas with enthusiasm and chirpily wish all I meet a Merry Christmas. Or Happy Holidays or Seasons Greetings whatever your preference.

TPBM will continue to pass on the Yuletide greetings.

Thank you, yes. Please all of you have a safe and Merry (in whatever way you like) Christmas. And a prosperous New Year.

TPBM wishes to extend their _____

...thanks to everyone who makes this such a pleasant place to hang out.

TPBM wishes _________.

Peace and contentment to all of the wonderful people below and above me.

TPBM is ____________.

Now home from work and is relaxing and having a JD and ginger

TPBM isn't really ready for all the family hoopla today.

Are you kidding? They should be here in three minutes! Then -- BREAKFAST!!!!!!

And it's just two of my three sons, and we've agreed to not exchange gifts, so it's all very low-keyed, except for BREAKFAST!!!!!!

I'm starving.

TPBM, on the other hand, is already overwhelmed, and is taking his/her time responding to this, just for the peace and quiet.

We've got four young'uns furiously playing with all of their new toys all at the same time. Electronics, flying helicopters, lightsabers and poi balls, and straight-out old fashioned noise makers. It's fun, but exhausting. I think I'll go have another cup of tea and our traditional cinnamon rolls.

Happy holidays and Bless us every one.

TPBM isn't quite up yet.

Merry Christmas! I've been dozing off all week, so no. I'd attach a picture of the view in front of me but that would just be cruel, and I'm not cruel. I am not!!

TPBM got a special present.

Books are always special and I got 6 of them.

TPBM also got a special present.

From Santa, it said, but I suspect either my sister or her husband. At any rate, I need socks and now I have a new favorite pair:



TPBM is impressed that I remembered the correct HTML for once without having to look it up.

And with your socks!

TPBM also had a unique gift....

(other than a trip to the islands like SGiV)

I got Hemp chocolates.

TPBM can easily top that.

Easy. I've got MrsHouseLibrary, and she'd doing fine.

TPBM, like me, understands there's no such thing as "too much coffee."

Not strictly true, I'm afraid. When younger I induced an episode of supraventricular tachycardia by drinking a coffeepot-full. This resolved reasonably promptly and never happened again but I am cautious.

TPBM thrives on excess.

Yes, but I do try and avoid the dropping-off point.

//>94 2wonderY: That is very cool.//

TPBM recently won.

I did!
I've been running a writing group for almost the past five years now. Every November is National Novel Writing Month or: NaNoWriMo. The idea is to write 50,000 words in 30 days, and you can track your progress online.

Every November, I schedule an evening of a meeting format called Write In, and it's open to everyone to come and just write for a few hours. This year, we went full-bore -- five hours each Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday evening, and three hours on Wednesday mornings. Crazy! That's eighteen hours each week, and a total of seventy-five hours for the entire month. We sweetened the deal with having door prizes to be drawn at the last Write In. For each session you participate in, you write your name on a ticket, so the more often you participate, the greater your chances of winning something.

Well, participation was deplorable. On the last night, there were thirty-one tickets in the sack, and thirteen of them had my name on them. A separate sack contained tickets with the prizes on them. I won three door prizes, so I tossed two of of the three prize tickets back into the sack, and more names were drawn. My name was drawn eleven times.

The prize I kept -- a license for a writing tool called Scrivener. I've got it loaded; it looks cool; but I'm not going to be able to find the time to learn how to use it for a couple months yet. But, damn it, I won!

TPBM has big plans to get snookered on New Year Eve; or has the sense to participate in National Book Reading Day.

I think I can fit both in since National Book Reading Day is on Jan. 22nd. Woohoo, I love it when I can schedule things in advance on my calendar.

TPBM will binge on reading, now that Christmas is over.

This is the time of year that I order in all sorts of weird stuff from the library. I won't read everything, but I'll satisfy my curiosity.

TPBM has a folder full of old book catalogs and book reviews to reference.

No, but it sounds like a good idea. As long as it doesn't take up any space.

TPBM knows what to do when the urge to simplify runs headlong into too many damn books.

Simply stretch out on the couch with a thick one and some noshes.

TPBM is hosting some kind of a party this week.

Kind of, sort of. WholeHouseStep-Son and family are coming in from the panhandle this Thursday night and staying the weekend. The family includes a two-month-old. I say the panhandle, but really, they live a far distance from nowhere, so ... somewhere around that part of Texas. We plan to celebrate New Year by snoring.

TPBM already knew that what I'll be doing is often louder than what one might be exposed to in Time Square when the ball drops.

I didn't know, but I'm sure MrsWholeHouse knows...

TPBM has an odd hobby.

How did you know? It's reading, natch -- modern physics, cosmology, theoretical quantum stuff, etc. Wish I understood it as much as a physicist. I also follow CERN on my G+. Total nerd. So, bombard me with a proton stream!

TPBM Knows the difference between Veuve Clicquot brut and Korbel blindfolded.

Doesn't everyone?

TPBM actually has a clue as to that of which Limelight speaks.

I've never come across Korbel in the UK but having read a bit about it on-line I have little doubt that I could differentiate it from the Widow with my eyes shut. If anyone could send me a bottle or two I'll give it a try ;-)

TPBM will drink the New Year in with something fizzy.

Not unless we really do get to the American Business College today, as planned. We drank the last bottle from the cooler last night.

TPBM still has plenty of _____

Excess fat, sadly. My intention, as opposed to a goal or resolution, is to get my weight below two hundred pounds. If I have to donate organs to get there, so be it.

TPBM is irked by people who add the 's' to New Year Eve/Day.

I nearly tripped over the rough patch you left when you dropped the 's.' Slippery thing, that.

TPBM knows the ratio of microorganisms in the human body by weight, and reassure WHL that it ain't all him.

Not offhand, but I work in DC and know that a lot of people are full of something .

TPBM and I wish everyone a Happy New Year!

We certainly do ... and a safe and prosperous one. With lots of books!
TPBM concurs

Hear, hear. I'll drink to that. Later of course.

TPBM. Also concurs.

Right on! A little less than 6 hours of 2015 left here.

TPBM is looking forward to 2016 (difficult to do anything else, of course!)

I sure am. In a positive, I'm going to quit my job with the intent of retiring, way. Only 20 working days left!!!

TPBM is looking forward to 2016 too.

//Happy New Year!//

Yes, oh man yes!

TPBM made the New Year Honour List.

Our dear Abbott? Again!!
//Blimey SGiV you even spelt it right!//

TPBM claims there is no u in Honor.

// Happy New Year everyone! //

Without u, there is no honour.

TPBM resolves _________________

To wish @karenmarie a happy retirement! Can we have a party?

TPBM will bring __________.

... a cash donation to help pay for those new tires?

TPBM will bring ________.

Booze, same as always.

TPBM will bring __________.

Crisps, nuts, canapés.

TPBM has a relevant allergy.

No cantaloupe in the fruit salad, please. It gives me hives.

TPBM is relevant to _______.

Off hand,I'd say MrsHouseLibrary, which is good, seeing as how we're married and all.

TPBM is relative to _____________.

A well- known actress, which I've mentioned before and will no doubt mention again.

TPBM is famous for ___________.

Nothing much. At least nothing that 'the can be proved.

TPBM declared ___________.

Just me and the missus on the income tax thing. The boys moved out several years ago. I miss those deductions. (sniff.)

TPBM declined ______________.

An offer from a lawyer in Nairobi who wanted to send me a fortune left by my long lost relative.

TPBM decided ____________.

To clean my car today. It looks like a homeless person lives in it. If I don't return, let my family know I always loved them.

TPBM is enjoying the break from holiday festivities.

That's debatable. Lumberjacks are driving heavy equipment all over our plantation, taking out the sick and pine bark beetle infested pines. Chain saws and occasional crashes.

Inside, contractors took down a wall, took up some tile, and are now nail-gunning the studs for the staircase well enclosure. Every tool has it's own particular ear-splitting frequency.

Peace on Earth it ain't.

TPBM thinks peace on Earth is overrated and prefers chaos.

No, it's not, and no, I don't. What PoE is, is elusive.

TPBM thinks.

Like somebody - I forget who - said, "Sometimes I sits and thinks and sometimes I jest sits." That's the gist of it, anyway.

TPBM is more relaxed.

I'm really relaxed. I took a muscle relaxant. About to take another.

TPBM took _____________.

a muscle relaxant last night but it has worn off and I have a tension headache. Insomnia has struck. It just isn't right to be up at 3 a.m. knowing it's a work day.

TPBM loves their job, strange but true.

I do. I just wish I could do it with different co-workers in a more respectful environment.

TPBM is job-hunting.

No, that sounds like too much work. I guess I'll just have to stick it out here for a few more years.

TPBM's dream job would be ____________.

...exactly what I'm doing now. Always complained that I didn't know what I wanted to be when I grew up and now I know: retired.

TPBM is more ambitious.

I wanna be a farmer. Always have.

TPBM also has a lifetime desire.

To not be a farmer. My daddy farmed tobacco and cotton as a kid, walking behind a mule and plow at 6:00am. One sweltering day he looked up at the pole standing at the far end of the field they used as a guide to keep the rows straight, said out loud "Like hell" and the rest is history. My grandmother gave him a silver hair brush and his aunt gave him a ruby ring, and he was in New York city on his 18th birthday.

So far, I've succeeded so well I don't even keep potted plants.

TPBM also has a lifetime desire.

Yes, to be independently wealthy and travel. (oops, would those be 2 lifetime desires?)

TPBM is ready for a break.

Yes! Oh god, what is wrong with me? I just had two weeks off and I feel like I've got mud in my veins.

TPBM is bright eyed and bushy tailed.

Not with the meds I'm on!

I've got tendonitis from cutting firewood to length, and stressed out back muscles from sleeping in the recliner on the nights that MrsHouseLibrary is hooked up to her chemo pump. (Three more to go!)

TPBM will come to my house and walk on my back. (please)

I would but I am quite certain that would not improve the state of your back. Sending my warm thoughts to you, your back and Mrs. WHL for the next three nights.

My knees are killing me from trying to dance "Footloose" for the staff portion of the school dance extravaganza. This was not the dance for which I voted. I was thinking more on the lines of a sedate waltz.

TPBM will Begin the Beguine.

Beguine ... a white nun, later woman in the islands". So as SGiV is our resident expert on the Caribe we will leave it to him to begin.

TPBM will evolve the dance theme.

Aak! Jumped!

I'm sorry, I was distracted by the hypnotic beat and glow in the dark plastic jewelry.

Dance with me, you fool!

TPBM is all 'peace out' and stuff.

Right arm.

TPBM is secretly hoping for the end of times -- or will change the subject entirely. (My vote. I shouldn't try to do this pre-coffee.

It would at least be interesting, eh?

TPBM is always looking for the next thing.

And I found it/them.

1) There are 4 new elements in the Periodic Table, line 7 is full now. Their names all begin with "unun."

2) Rock Star Psychologist Bandura Receives National Medal of Science

3) Recent discovery of Homo naledi: Is it not a new species at all? Is it a smaller and more primitive variant of Homo erectus? Mutation!

TPBM has been doing a happy dance ever since weed got legalized in 23 states and D.C.

No, I've never ... imbibed. The "worst" thing I've ever done is drink 47 12-oz bottles of Coke (the cola) in one night when I was in high school. Or maybe the summer in college when I downed a 3-liter bottle of Pepsi every night. Probably why I'm diabetic now.

TPBM has pure spring water running through his/her veins.

(As for me, the doctor says I have too much blood in my caffeine system.)

I gave up artificial sweeteners, then I gave up HFCS, and I found what was left was either too expensive or not that good. I stopped drinking bottled water because it seems so wasteful to pay for what I can get out of a drinking fountain or tap. Fancy spring water often has environmental issues or corporate issues (I found out my favorite regional spring water company was bought by a corporation with which I have issues), and no matter what you choose, you're dealing with an empty bottle and all the fuel it took to ship that liquid around.

So I use my Brita pitcher, and the heck with it. I can always make tea or lemonade.

TPBM thinks I overthink stuff.

Nope, I agree. At home we have a filter on our faucet, and I'm thinking of getting one for my shop, but we may get the Brita pitcher instead. Last year I started making a big effort to reduce the amount of waste I produce, focusing on plastic.

TPBM composts.

It's a legal requirement in my municipality so yes, both work and home. Plus recycling most everything else. Garbage is greatly reduced.

TPBM would wish to reduce something else.

Where to start? Man's inhumanity to man, poverty, the influence of organised religions, the greed of many at the top of financial services...... But maybe I will stick to a (modest) reduction in my alcohol intake and a (rather less modest) reduction in my visceral fat.

TPBM has had it with New Year Resolutions

Trying is just the first step toward failure! Although I do resolve to conduct another book purge. I've got horder's angst. There's a lot to be said for eBooks as long as we can avoid system failure. Which we won't.

TPBM is rebelling.

Yes I am! However it's sort of a silent rebellion so I'm not sure if anyone will notice.

TPBM notices that ______________.

I've seen Office Space. It's always the quiet rebellers who burn the joint down!

TPBM will draw a rebeller flag.

Are you kidding? I live in NoGA. There are 'nuff rebeller flags to choke a chickenhawk 'round here. I just learned today that the Sons of the Confederacy organization is the code organization for the KKK. "Lawzy, Miss Scarlett, I don't no nothin' 'bout drawing rebeller flags!"

TPBM has never immolated a toasted marshmallow.

Some might consider that to be redundant.

TPBM prefers them charcoaled.

Flaming, like so much else in life.

TPBM has a system.

I have lots of systems. The efficacy of any of those systems is a different story entirely.

TPBM has a different story.

No; just one, and I'm sticking to it. No one can accuse me of anything that way.

TPBM has a different drummer.

I have a brother who is a drummer. And he's different.

TPBM makes a difference.

I teach music to preschoolers and kindergartners. I like to think that makes a difference.

TPBL makes a difference in a different way.

I differentiate between those who try to make a positive difference and those who defer to dither.

TPBM will please refrain from using any "D" words in her/his response.

What disastrous due diligence!

The person below me does something daft.

Every day, at least once.

TPBM prevented a break in the space time continuum.

Patched it with bubble gum. You're welcome.

TPBM would rather I had let it be.

Yes, because I think when you patched it it messed with my chances of winning the lottery. Geez...must be Monday...again.

TPBM is looking at snow.

Good lord no! A bright, sunny if crisp, morning here in Florida. But yes, it iS Moanday again.

TPBM prefers waking up to yet another Monday to the alternative.

You mean the sweet release of death?

Just me, but there are days I curse the fact I'm still here. I've had enough.

TPBM picks pennies up from the sidewalk.

Yes! And I'm going to buy a lottery ticket, too!

TPBM met Lady Luck.

If I did, she forgot my name.

However, my luck is going to change right now! I just bought the winning lottery ticket. Yes, I did so you all can save your money and go on home now. Woohoo!!!

TPBM thinks they hold the GOLDEN ticket.

No, I'm betting on you. But you want everyone else to continue putting money into the pot, yeah? Doesn't that make your win bigger?

TPBM would rather avoid that big tax bill on winnings.

Sorta, but there's a lot that I could use the net winnings for.

The person below me will buy a ticket for lottery ticket for something other than Powerball.

Yes, a MegaMillions ticket.

//>172 morningwalker: >173 2wonderY: >174 AnnaClaire: The jackpot is expected to be over a billions dollars. $1,000,000,000. I can't imagine Lady Luck not wanting me to play.//

TPBM has a magic elixir.

//>173 2wonderY: There's not a real lot you can do to avoid the IRS robbing you, but you can move to a state with no income tax or that doesn't tax lottery winnings to limit it to them.

>>175 SomeGuyInVirginia: As of the last report I heard about it on the news, it's up to 1.4 billion right now, and quite likely to grow even more before the numbers are drawn Wednesday night//

Yes, sometimes I call it wine and sometimes I call it gin & tonic.

TPBM has a ritual they do every day.

I do the hokey pokey. Old school, mayhaps, but that's what it's all about.

TPBM cants.

I can't

(but maybe i am doing right now, who knows)

TPBM chants.

Chance would be the fine thing!

TPBM charts

I did!? Excuse me.

TPBM chats

Eh.

TPBM chits

Quite regularly, thank you very much.

TPBM snits.

I'm in a snit, at the moment. Broke my pearl bracelet taking the trash out. Fortunately the strand had a knot after every pearl so I only lost one, but I'm still peeved.

TPBM has a cure for snits.

Nude beaches. I've been told they often leaves bathers without a top to snit in.

TPBM snaps.

And chats.

TPBM slips.

Freudian mainly.

TPBM slaps.

Only on request.

TPBM taps.

Well, my toes when I get bored and don't have knitting and/or a book nearby.

The person below me tips.

A keg - No
Dances - No
Plays the tune - No
Taps on a touchscreen - A whole lot

In restaurants.

TPBM flips.

tables:

(╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻ ┬──┬ ¯\_(ツ) ┻━┻ ︵ヽ(`Д´)ﾉ︵ ┻━┻ ┬─┬ノ( º _ ºノ) (ノಠ益ಠ)ノ彡┻━┻
( didn't make that myself)

TBPM clips

fingernails, toenails, hair and coupons

TPBM claps

Especially to save the life of a fairy.

TPBM flaps.

No, but my scarf sure has been. Wind, and all.

The person below me flips.

According to my quarter, you win!

TPBM flops.

Into bed, right now.

TPBM remembers floppy disks.

And cassette tapes, and 8-track tapes, and VCRs, and rotary dial phones, and party lines, and dot matrix printers.

TPBM remembers ___________.

Eric Heiden became World Champion

TPBM remembers something else

Not my mother's phone number, that's for sure.

TPBM knows what is important.

Yes. Retiring in 2 weeks at the age of 62 to repair my physical and mental health and look forward to doing fun things, happy things, frivolous things, contributing things, and meaningful things for the next 30 years.

TPBM can't believe how warm the winter has been so far.

Yes! Christmas eve, the temperature in St. Thomas was 7 degrees warmer than DC. That's just nuts.

TPBM goes for the gold.

I'd rather go for the gusto.

The person below me has some gold.

If I do, it's fool's gold.

TPBM has a gold star.

Actually, I have a whole bunch of them. They're all in an envelope with the Christmas cards a friend who hoped to glitter bomb a bunch of us sent us a couple times.

TPBM has a more substantial star.

I have one, but most have you have a lot more, the winners are Phaedra and AnnaClaire with ten! Thank You All!

TPBM likes silver more than gold

Let's just leave it as: My brown hair is now silver and that golden tan I had as a kid is now an expansive pasty white. Do I like it that way? No, but I accept it as a fact of my life.

TPBM has a book of metallurgy in his/her library.

I've got a book on metal magic, does that count?

TPBM has an opinion on metal music.

Yes I do.

TPBM plays an instrument.

Afraid not. Sadly, I have no musicality at all.

TPBM has a talent.

I'm ... just not going there.

TPBM has been there and back.

Yeah, and I'll probably go back again.

TPBM has binge watched something lately (please say yes so I don't feel guilty alone about my wasted weekend).

It is the season for warming oneself in front of the telly. I watched the entire Lord of the Rings trilogy and lengthy bonus materials this past weekend.

TPBM, however, got so much done.

Nyet! Last week was hell on earth (annual planning conf week), so Saturday night I sat down after dinner and, from reports I gathered after the event, fell so deeply asleep that I could not be wakened.

TPBM is ready for snow.

That depends on the amount.

This past August, I actually used the snow shovel I had brought with me from New Jersey almost twenty-seven years ago. I had to trim up a lot trees in my yard, and take down a Live Oak that was mostly dead and an Elm that had been weakened by decades of mistletoe and infestations of worms and ants. The Elm was eighty-five feet tall and less than twenty feet from my house. With the help of my three sons and a device called a boom (an articulated cherry-picker,) we were able to get the basic work done in just over twelve hours. That's just getting the trees and limbs down. It took me another three weeks and nine trips to the recycling center to remove the rotted and otherwise too-small-for-the-fireplace limbs and branches.

The thing is, the majority of the Elm leaves dropped off the branches, so I had a proverbial carpet of elm leaves four inches thick covering a couple hundred square feet of my front lawn. I raked them to a convenient spot, spread a very large tarp into the bed of my '94 Chevy Silverado, and used the snow shovel -- see this really is about the snow shovel -- to scoop the leaves into the bed of the truck. Once full, I folded the tarp over the mess, weight it down with another limb or two and head out to the recycling center. By that time, they didn't even bother asking for my water bill anymore; they knew who I was. Three truckloads of leaves, each one over a cubic yard. My neighbors had never seen a snow shovel before, and I felt like Tom Sawyer whitewashing the fence when they asked if they could try it out.

TPBM sometimes feels like the literary character _____________ because ______________.

Scarlett O'Hara because, sometimes, I just don't give a damn!

I like this theme so let's hear from someone else.

//>212 2wonderY: Thanks for making me feel better about myself.//

TPBM sometimes feels like the literary character _____________ because ______________.

Dorothy, because I always seem to have one more task to perform before I can go home.

I like this too, so I'll give someone else a shot.

TPBM sometimes feels like the literary character _____________ because ______________.

//>215 morningwalker: - Oops I meant Rhett Butler.//

Eeyore, because he reflects my personality so well.

TPBM sometimes feels like the literary character _____________ because ______________.

Richard Fountain because vampires be like 'sup'.

TPBM sometimes feels like ______________ because ____________.

The dead. No coffee yet.

TPBM sometimes feels like the literary character _____________ because ______________.

Oh definitely like Winnie the Pooh, because I am floating around looking to get stung.

TPBM sometimes feels like the literary character _____________ because ______________.

Well then, I'll be Tigger, because life just is sooooo exciting. (And before someone else claims him.)

TPBM is a fictional character.

I wish, my life would have better pacing and a tidy resolution.

TPBM was ruined by ___________.

// >223 SomeGuyInVirginia: That depends on which writer would have created you... //

Fairy tales! They lied: there is no happily every after!

TPBM has a sunnier outlook.

I do. I'm still waiting for my happily ever after. And I don't like hearing that it's the journey that matters... I want the happy and I want it now. Oh wait, maybe that's not sunny.

The person below me has enhanced __________.

I have an enhanced driver's license. It lets me breeze relatively quickly through the border when heading to the country to my south. Except this last trip when I was asked all manner of strange questions coming and going including how long I've owned my car and what I did with myself between checking out of my hotel and heading back up over the border. Either increased security or they found something suspicious about a middle aged Sunday school teacher in a beat up red hatch-back.

TPBM often faces suspicion from those in authority.

Not too often. But a few years ago we discovered that my daughter, who was 8 at the time, is apparently on the no-fly-list. So anytime she checks in for a flight, she has to produce extensive documentation to prove that she isn't somebody dangerous.

TPBM is dangerous.

Not dangerous enough to be on the no-fly list. But I'm pretty sure I've got an FBI file.

TPBM knows for sure they have an FBI file.

Guilty, as charged.

My first job working with computers was with the company that was, in effect, the computer systems for NYSE and AMEX. I went through an extensive background check. The weird thing was, a few years earlier, my first wife and I had done a bicycle trip starting in northern New Jersey and ended in the panhandle of Florida. They interviewed people we met along the way. How they even knew or found any of them, I'll never know. The report, by the way, was two or three inches thick.

TPBM knows how they did it.

Did they follow your cell phone trail?

The person below me has the inside scoop.

Rocky road, sandwiched between two scoops of vanilla.

TPBM is craving something.

A warm summer day...sigh. I shouldn't complain about this winter because up until a week or two ago we had the mildest weather we've had in ages, but I'm going to anyway. There's a good song out there I think it's by the Cowboy Junkies and it sums up my feelings about winter. It starts with F and ends with I hate the cold.

TPBM can imagine ________.

Well, I imagine as soon as I get home I'm going to play that song on YouTube.

//We're under a blizzard warning! Up to three feet of snow. I've got enough canned meat and milk to last a month. God I wish I still smoked, this seems like the thing that calls for smoking.//

Imagine ___________, TPBM.

A world with no hypothetical situations.

AnnaClaire, I should have mentioned in #230, that the bicycle trip occurred in 1977, and the background check was in 1979 -- several years before portable phones were on the market.

TPBM is an early adopter of new technology.

Unfortunately, not.

The person below me is well established in the 21st century.

I think I am. But once in a while a young 'un makes the ageist assumption that I just want things "the old way." Hardly. So I say the heck with 'em; it's not my fault my first half-century was in the 20th.

TPBM has thoughts about the 20th.

It was a good century. Not great, but good.

TPBM got their milk and bread and water before superstorm 2016 hit.

Actually, even tho my area is going to get up to a foot of snow, (as of the latest prediction) I didn't do any special shopping to prepare for it. EVerything I bought is something I would have bought to have on hand for my "weekend". And while I have filled up a few empty jugs with water, I doubt I'll need them. DUring Hurricane Sandy, even with power problems around town, we still had water, tho the town did ask us to limit our use.

TPBM isn't in the "Danger zone".

By about 3000 miles. I'm in the El Niño zone.

TPBM is usually elsewhere.

As a rule, although I need to check from time to time.

TPBM is always grounded

Nyet! I can still fly, which, considering I make a rude gesture every time the TSA x-rays me, is a minor miracle.

//I've turned the heat on. I do hope Parker D. Cat doesn't get used to it but with up to three feet of snow coming it seemed like the thing to do. How can a sub-tropical state that's 105 in July get this much snow?//

TPBM is flighty.

You need to fact-check your sources, bucko!

I may be free-spirited, but I know where my towel is.

TPBM is mighty.

Mighty mighty lettin' it all hang out.

//Well over a foot of snow so far and it's pouring.//

TPBM is a brick house.

When I was young, someone might have used a similar phrase... Sigh. Not anymore.

I'm about to go swimming at the outdoor pool. It was 75 degrees today.

The person below me thinks I'm joking. Or maybe smoking.

Well, your profile page says you live in Phoenix, so I'll give you the benefit of the doubt.
Besides, what you do is none of my business, unless it affects me or possibly a classification of peoples directly, in a negative way.

TPBM finds that Monday is a pretty miserable way to spend one seventh of one's life.

Not since I retired. It's the least crowded morning in the apartment complex laundry room.

TPBM has other thoughts about Monday.

Curious, isn't it? In my youth, before washing machines and tumble dryers, even before twin-tubs and spin-dryers, Monday was always wash-day and clothes-lines would be full.

TPBM has used a mangle.

No, but I've seen them. In my yute, I took a break from college and lived in Europe. I took the train into Porto and saw women washing clothes in the river, and was convinced the tourism department was staging it to make the city seem quaint. Clueless.

TPBM has a clue.

I thought I did, but it was a red herring. Actually, the herring were running here last week (I live by San Francisco Bay) and brought with them many followers -- gulls, pelicans, sea lions, shore birds and even, apparently, large sturgeon. I didn't go out to look much this year because the weather has been nasty, but last year at this time I watched fishermen catching hundreds of them with hand held nets cast right off the pier.

TPBM likes to fish.

I do like to fish, just haven't done it in way too many years. Freshwater and saltwater. Some of my best memories are of fishing.

TPBM has a different outside pastime that evokes happy memories.

My dad regularly filled the station wagon on weekends with all kids past toddler, to give my mom a break. We had a box under the basement steps which held all the creek shoes - those which were too tattered for normal wear. Before piling into the car, we each stopped there to secure a pair that fit reasonably. Dad was new to the area, so we'd go off exploring all the back roads and piling out whenever water was sighted. Dad was a serious fisherman, so we were scouting good fishing streams. We spent the entire day walking along and in the water, turning over rocks, squirrelling through the underbrush, getting our sun and fresh air, and finally finding our way home near dark.

TPBM knows what sunshine smells like.

Why, yes, I have all the doors and windows open. It is supposed to cool back down to the 60's this week, though.

abbot, Monday was washday when I was a kid too. In fact, there is a song about "this is the way we wash our clothes, so early Monday morning..."

The person below me has a childhood song pop up in his or her head every once in a while.

Prokofiev's Peter and the Wolf. It scared me then and it still does.

TPBM is the piano man/woman/self-determining carbon based life form.

Kind of. I'm working on being the banjo woman instead.

TPBM is working on a new skill.

Yes, I really am going to learn Dreamweaver this year.

TPBM has a pest.

I think I might. A few days ago I heard scurrying noises in the dining room ceiling but it immediately stopped when I tried to locate it again. It would be no surprise to have a mouse, squirrel or even bat up there as there has been evidence of critters in the past.

TPBM thinks with 3 cats in the house there would be no small intruders.

You think? The cat that owns us just settles down, crosses his front paws and watches the huge Huntsman (or Rain) spiders with minimal interest.

TPBM knows that SGiV will obey his Mayor and stay at home today.

That would be the warm thing to do.

The person below me has tried a new food and will tell. (I had chayote for the first time last night. Good cooked or raw. We had a chayote/carrot/herb salad. It was delicious.)

Not really new. I went a little mad in the grocery store buying non-perishables for the storm, and managed to come home with a box of Froot Loops cereal. I was wondering when was the last time I had them and the only thing I could come up with was Mom buying them for my brother and me when we were kids. I also have a bag of Lindt truffles, 14 cans of evaporated milk, three bags of rolls, and lets just say if you want canned Lima beans I can set you up.

//Good grief xor, I could have sworn you wrote 'coyote'.//

TPBM is done with new things.

That would be hard. There are always new things. Though I must confess I usually like the old ones.

TPBM prefers the new.

//SGiV, made me laugh. I do get a few coyotes running through my yard at night, but haven't ever eaten one. No one that I know had ever tried chayote but it must be in season because it is in all the grocery stores. I liked it and will be happy to have it again. I hope you enjoy your Fruit Loops! And stay warm. NPR says DC will research whether or not it was a record snowfall...

And I hope everyone stays safe who is enduring horrible weather. I didn't see any news yesterday and so had no idea just how horrible the East was having it. Yikes!//

Lime Spouse is doing the Boy Scout thing and attempting to start the wood fire in the kiva. Starting a fire when you only have green logs is no easy task. If it were really cold out, and if we had no power providing heat, I wonder if we would freeze before he was able to get a life-saving steady burning established?

TPBM could start a fire outdoors in the rain or snow with nothing but two sticks to rub together.

Nope, not even close; but I can start our new propane stove in the living room with *blushes* the push of a button on the remote control.

TPBM thinks that's decadent beyond words.

I do. I think it is lovely. I swore I would never own another fireplace, but when I bought this house, it had a gas fireplace. No wood to acquire, bring in, fire to build, ashes to take out. But I have to light it with a match after turning on the gas. Not a joy like your remote!

The person below me still builds wood fires in a fireplace.

I can't at the moment. Mind you. I've got enough firewood to last me a few years as a result of having to take down a mostly dead Live Oak and a mistletoe-and-insect-infested Elm earlier this year. But, MrsHouseLibrary decided a few years ago that she'd rather have the fireplace as a display case for several specimens of minerals we've collected over the years. You can't really see them with the fireplace screen in place, but she thinks they're lovely all the same.

She's been telling me she would remove the stones for over a year and a half now, but whenever I offer to help her, she declines. I think What I actually have outside is well-stacked termite fodder. Le sigh.

TPBM knows how much cubic footage of wood there is in a cord.

Nope. I have an almost empty barn where I stack my firewood, so I just have plenty even for a cold winter. I don't have an open fireplace though, just a stove.

TPBM loves big camp fires, the larger the better.

Not too big. Gotta get those coals right for the marshmallows. I've been playing with a rocket stove for cooking, and they are very efficient, using nothing larger than twigs.

TPBM has used a solar cooker.

No, but I would love to. The whole concept of solar energy makes so much sense. Unfortunately I live in an area that gets a lot of cloud cover. There was actually a TNT plant built here during WWII specifically because we get so much cloud cover and it would be harder to spot by enemy forces.

TPBM has solar panels.

Yes i have! since about 2000. When we moved we took the - only four :( - square meters with us.
So nice to see the 'electric meter' counting down/ turning backwards during sunny days in late spring and summer.

TPBM has a solar water heater

Nope, and the hot water heater in my building goes out frequently. (I have no idea where it goes, it's not like it knows a lot of people or anything.) A freezing cold shower in the am is very, er, bracing and often accompanied by much swearing.

TPBM has joy down in their heart.

Only at the thought of only having three more nights of work before I'm off again.

TPBM has happy feet.

So happy I would tiptoe through the tulips, if there were any available right now.

TPBM has sad eyes.

I wish, that stuff is better than having a puppy.

TPBM thinks it was great when it all began.

I believe the term they use is "big," not "great." I have never formally studied physics. I've read the books, though, and have some practical applied knowledge, but having no empirical evidence of my own, I rely on the plausibility of what is presented by all those folks with the strange initials after their names. Oddly enough, I find that those who have those initials, and don't display them often, tend to be more reasonable than the rest.
So, what it comes down to is this: I can't say. I wasn't there when it all began.

Or was I? Am I not part of the material spewed forth from way back then?

TPBM is more certain.

Certain of how it all began or certain that you were there as part of the material spewed forth?

Hmmmm...If a man will begin with certainties, he shall end in doubts: but if he will be content to begin with doubts, he shall end in certainties. Francis Bacon. I think I doubt that I'm certain about anything. This is so profound.

TPBM has a profound thought.

Don't should on yourself.

TPBM also has a profound thought.

Perhaps; perhaps not. I suspect I might, because a lot of people say that they never ,ever, ever ,ever considered {insert topic here} that way before. But then again, often when I try to add a new perspective to an issue, the response is something akin to: "Utter rubbish!" so, I imagine the profundity-ness of a statement can only be determined by the listeners, not the speaker.

TPBM will now expostulate the the virtues of, oh, I don't know ... whirled peas.

Oh lord, not another legume vortex. Did we learn nothing after the last incident, people?!

TPBM let it play out.

I love legumes and I don't remember the last incident. Was it bad?

TPBM has a favorite legume.

Tepary beans. I discovered them a couple of years ago. Full of protein and don't taste bad. I also like peas.

The person below me still marvels at things like "Live Chat." (I just did business with Medicare and it too less that five minutes from the comfort of my home!)

Yes, I marvel. But the deeper I go into IT, the less of it I use at home.

TPBM bought the puppy in the window.

Clearly, you've forgotten my four essays on the theme I an not a Pet Person.

TPBM also understands, through reason and logic that inter-species cohabitation is an abomination.

Logic and reason have nothing to do with it - my two kitties are a joy. And a pain. Just like people.

TPBM is amused.

OK, let's go with that.

//Parker is a pain in my behind and I adore the little shithead.//

TPBM thinks first let's hang all the politicians.

And the politicians who aren't even politicians, but who are running for office nonetheless. Off with their heads.

TPBM wants a revamped system.

No, we have enough Vamps in our politics already.

TPBM finds it hard to believe that the English complain about "all this politics' with a 3 WEEK election cycle. (Mmmm maybe we DO need to restructure).

Three weeks, that's it?! I'm jealous. I'm also jealous of the nations that have proportional representation.

TPBM found peace in tuning out all the political nonsense.

//>286 morningwalker: Here's one...



//

//>289 rastaphrog: This could be the beginning of something good.//

Alas, no. This is the Nation's Blah and there isn't much else to talk about.

TPBM misses this product, no longer made.

Peet's tea! The parent company that bought Peet's also owns MightyLeaf, and has replaced the Peet's tea line with that brand. While I'm sure MightyLeaf sells perfectly acceptable tea, they don't have some of my favorite blends any more.

TPBM has a strong opinion about tea.

A moderately strong opinion: a good Darjeeling, no milk, sweetened with honey.

The person below me also has a strong opinion about tea.

Iced tea is regularly either too sweet or too tannic.

//Just this week I had to school an employee at an Oregon BBQ joint that the two categories were sweet tea and unsweet tea, not "not-sweet" tea. These West Coast kids...//

TPBM is scandalized at the thought.

I am. It is important to properly request cold tea. In SoCal you just ask for Tea. If you want it sugared, you have to add sugar. Here in NC you must say un-sweet tea, and you can either say tea or sweet tea for the sugared variety. I prefer unsweet tea. When you ask for unsweet tea it's assumed that you are dieting, so you either automatically get sweet 'n low or you're asked if you want sweet 'n low.

TPBM makes their own cold tea so it's exactly what they want.

The only cold tea in our house is hot tea that wasn't drunk and hasn't yet been poured away. Never have come to terms with non-hot tea!

TPBM likes the idea of a sugar tax

Ah! Preempted by abbotthomas!

Well, no, I don't. It falls into the category of "deadly foods" for me. I suspect it's the tannic acid that's the problem; just tears up my stomach and guts. Can't have alcohol, red fruits or veggies, onions, garlic, any peppers, and most herbs and spices, either.

Mind you, I would love to have some alternative to coffee, it would have to be a tea with at least half the amount of tannin removed. Not sure if such a thing exists.

I do! It's about time we focused on the actual cause of obesity and many other health issues rather than all the misdirection by the food industry.

TPBM is up and raring to go today.

Gah, sort of. I have cabin fever from being homebound by the blizzard, but I also have a cold. I want to get out but don't feel like it. So I'm going to do the manly thing and whine about it.

TPBM met a mysterious stranger.

Well I have, but out of a sense of self preservation it's better if I don't expound on the encounter.

TPBM will get to meet someone in the near future that they've wanted to meet for some time now.

Will you be in Toronto soon? :-)

TPBM would love to meet _________________

All of you!

TPBM promises to make it happen.

I will as soon as I perfect that teleportation machine! I'm working as fast as I can, but the time machine people keep stealing my parts.

TPBM would use a time machine to go to __________.

Ancient Greece and live on Kriti as the scribe who wrote the Phaestos Disk. Or someone else in an era when life could be made interesting if only you knew how to read and write.

TPBM has found an archaeological artifact.

Can't say that I have. Mostly, I don't think I'd recognize one out in the field anyway, but if I did, it probably wouldn't be smart to mention it to anyone.

Also, since your Profile Page says you're in NoGa (which I presume is nowhere Mesopotamia), I'm wondering how you might actually get to Kriti. Time machines only change your point in time, not location.

TPBM knows the answer, and will explain it in such a manner that I will actually be able to sleep restfully, because I won't until I know.

Don't worry about it, you'll get lines.

TPBM has a lot of moths to feed.

I haven't seen any lately, though there are times when we get a few browsing the wardrobe. My mother had a phobia of moths.

TPBM has a phobia.

Not so much now, but when I was a child I dreaded making telephone calls. I think it was not being able to see the face of the person on the other end. I still don't enjoy calling people I don't know, although I do it.

TPBM would be lost without their phone.

Well yes. And it gets lost around the house. I have to call it from the house phone......

TPBM uses their phone more for games and information than calling people.

The only game I play with my phone is hide and seek.

TPBM has misplaced something essential and critical.

Well, yes - I have a slim notebook in which I write hints to passwords I can't remember. I keep it in between books lest someone breaks in to steal. Then I lost it and had to take most of the books off the shelves in my search. It turned up inside the Oxford Book of English Verse (Quiller-Couch version, of course). Not quite as bad as finding the car keys in the fridge, I suppose, and it did provide an excuse for some dusting.

TPBM will get round to dusting their books quite soon.

When the next blizzard arrives in SE PA.

TPBM does it once a year whether it needs it or not.

Vacuuming. Although, I've been having people over twice a month and vacuuming a bit each time. At this point, I'm ahead for the next ten years.

TPBM has a special routine.

It's not that special but I walk every morning, except this morning, it was pouring.

TPBM thinks dust on books is okay, since they have "dust" covers.

Yes! We've lost enough jobs in this country, I refuse to put the entire dust cover industry out of business!

TPBM makes a clean sweep instead.

Today I'm taking all my orphan books to the thrift store - 125 of them. Clean sweep of the little yellow table and dresser in the sunroom.

TPBM sweeps their porch regularly.

If using a leaf blower counts a sweeping, then, sure. If it was done on an as-needed basis, it'd be an everyday task. Come springtime, I have to do it at least three times a day. The pollen and catkins from the Live Oaks pile several inches deep in just a few hours.

TPBM keeps the shrubbery on the property in a state of fine maintenance.

Well, "She Who Must Be Obeyed" does. I just haul the piles away!

TPBM also helps SWMBO to keep the place under control outside. The inside is ignored - noone sees it except the dogs and us!

I kneel before no power!

TPBM feels revolution in the air.

Not so much revolution, but some kind of "change" is "in the air" at work. Before I left this morning the meat wrapper asked me a question, and when I asked for details before I'd respond, she said "You didn't hear?", and after I said no, she decided to not say anything about it to me.

TPBM dreads change(s) at work.

Changes = More work

in this decade. So yeah.

TPBM could use a nap.

Yes.

//>318 SomeGuyInVirginia: Hmmm...would Parker D. Cat concur with that?//

TPBM likes things just the way they are.

Makes me think of Belloc - "Always keep a hold on Nurse for fear of finding something worse."

And then, thinking of SomeGuy's revolution and watching Trump, Sanders, Cruz and Clinton, I remembered another Belloc quote:

The accursed power which stands on Privilege
(And goes with Women, and Champagne, and Bridge)
Broke - and Democracy resumed her reign
(Which goes with Bridge, and Women and Champagne).

TPBM is blowin' in the wind

We are this morning dear Abbott, yes, SSW at 18 mph.

Whilst SGiV would know those poems by Belloc (he seems to have all his works) his thoughts seem to be on another, earlier revolution. He quoted Sartre to me.
Mind he IS in the USA's Blah.

TPBM wonders what will happen next as our "Democracy resumes"?

Well, since it's become a 3-ring circus I believe they will be sending in the clowns.

TPBM can juggle.

AND I've got a multicolored wig and big red overalls (don't ask).

TPBM can ride horses standing up.

Only bank accounts ... most of the time.

TPBM jiggles.

If I was riding horses standing up I would most certainly jiggle.

TPBM has ridden an elephant or pig or some other non-equine animal.

I rode a giant tortoise at the zoo when I was 5 -- we have photos.

TPBM has owned a dog big enough to ride on.

Clearly, you don't know me.

TPBM's next vehicle will be: ________________

Yikes! I don't want to think about a next vehicle. Mine is 10 years old, PAID for, and has so far been a great little car with only basic maintenance.

TPBM takes the bus.

I would if I could, but the only buses around here are school buses, and you couldn't pay me enough to ride on one of those at this point in my life.

TPBM had to ride the school bus as a child.

From 9th grade through 12th grade. Prior to that, before we moved, we walked to school.

TPBM went to a 3-year high school, grades 10-12.

I did go to a 3-year high school but it was grades 9-11.

TPBM owns a motorcycle.

I do, but it's in pieces in my SILs shed. I think it will stay there forever.

TPBM has kept something large strictly for sentimental reasons.

I have a free-standing cabinet humidor, copper-lined with a little (non-working) clock in the door. It belonged to my grandfather. My dad said he never remembered his parent's home without it, so it dates to at least the early 1920s. I think it's older than that, with its dark wood and heavy Victorian/Edwardian style.

It is purely sentimental. I've never smoked.

TPBM has an antique.

Several, actually. From WholeHouseParents-in-Law; a Kellogg telephone, a still-operable hand-crank phonograph, and several other smaller items.
From my side of the family; an buffet I bought while living in the Adirondacks, and a secretary desk I got from a grand-aunt's attic in Rifton, NY. She was the last of the one-room school teachers, and they named a high school after her. The finish on said desk had crystallized, so in the process of refinishing it, I found an envelope containing some nonviable red seeds, several 3-cent postage stamps, and a a folded-up paper poster advertising an outdoor musical concert to be held at in the park in Goshen, NY on July 10, 1885.

TPBM goes antiquing as a form of exercise.

No, but now you've given me an excuse.

TPBM feels like an antique when exercising.

At my age, I should not even admit this . . .

But, yes, sometimes. Probably because of the potstickers and chili oil I keep gorging on:
MUST . . . EXERCISE . . . SELF . . . CONTROL!

TPBM enjoys hot chili oil as much as I do.

Spicy! Yum, yes I do. And potstickers too.

TPBM is spicy.

Never. Ever. Ever.

TPBM dicey.

I do but don't enjoy it. I have a little tiny food processor that is perfect.

The person below me prefers knife wielding.

I'm dicey with veggies 'cause I like to cook Asian style and quasi-vegetarian dishes.
Spicey? NO! i don't like my food to hurt me!

TPBM has eaten Indian food that "stayed" with them 3 days.

No. I find that the curries are fairly well behaved and do not overstay their welcome.

TPBM has a good technique to encourage visitors to leave in a timely fashion.

Sure do. I talk, and keep adding in details and seques, and don't stop until they're gone. Works like a charm.

Who have thought that this extreme introvert (me) could manage that!

TPBM knows the trick to public speaking.

Not to do it.

TPBM will express an opinion.

Okay. In my opinion, what I pay in taxes and the benefits I receive are not balanced by any means.

//>343 carod: I know someone who used to say "come on Martha, let's go to bed so these nice people can go home," when he wanted to get rid of hangers on.//

TPBM will also opine.

Taxes are the price of living in a civilized society.

TPBM will continue with the opining.

O pine, why do you burn so sweetly in the place of fire?

TPBM has a trick knee.

I had a trick knee - it made interesting popping and grating sounds, but for some reason those have gone away. I'm not complaining!

TPBM is ambidextrous.

Yes I am -- equally uncoordinated in both hands.

TPBM is bicameral.

Im not, and I donʻt favor it
for state legislatures. (Okay for
the U. S. Congress).

TPBM thinks there hasnʻt been a successful
U. S. presidential SECOND term since FDR
(1937-1941).

Not being American I would hesitate to venture an opinion. I suspect you may be correct however.

TPBM understands why the duck is lame.

Too much wise quacking.

TPBM raised ducks as hobby.

No, chickens professionally.

TPBM has an unusual hobby.

I collect weird stuff, like headhunter tribal nicknacks.

TPBM is more subdued.

If I were, I'd be collecting dust.

Dust, by the way, was the prototype of dirt, but it failed the cohesion test.
So the marketeers renamed it.
What we call dirt now is really Dirt 2.0.

Yeah, I'm that old.

TPBM remembers what SGiV asked.

No, but I can see it on my monitor. Hmm. Actually I'm a bit giddy these days.

TPBM thinks that there are way too many choices in supermarkets.

Fortunately the stuff that they want you to buy is mostly at eye level and also clustered around you at the check-out, so that's OK, isn't it?

TPBM still has a copy of The Hidden Persuaders on their shelves

I remember it because, yeah, I'm that old.

I also remember an art professor putting up posters of adverts and showing us all the sexual innuendo hidden in the art, like naked ladies in the ice cubes.

TPBM would like something else in their ice cubes.

No, I'm perfectly okay with that, thanks.

TPBM prefers the ice tea to be unsweetened.

Depends where you are. Kentucky sweet tea is gag-worthy, and must be cut with unsweetened.

TPBM's body is a temple.

Not even a roadside shrine.

TPBM built on a solid foundation.

And I am now struggling to erode it.

TPBM is svelte

In my dreams!!!

TPBM is frugal.

I kinda have to be. No job and all.

The person below me has two jobs, and can give me one of them.

Sorry, I only have one that I hate, but need to pay the bills.

TPBM feels a change in the wind coming soon.

As the Zen master said, "We'll see."
It depends more on how the current status quo changes in the House and Senate more than the White House.

TPBM will severely reprimand me for thinking morningwalker was referring to politics instead of the weather, and will then change the subject.

Bad!

The person below me has mastered the art of downsizing stuff.

I don't know about mastered, but I'm pretty good. Every time I move, I purge stuff.

TPBM follows a tidy schedule for keeping clutter in line.

Yep, every twenty years or so, I buy another house and proceed to fill it up. How's that for a management plan?

TPBM just shuddered.

I didn't mean to; I just couldn't help myself.

TPBM bakes bread occasionally.

True confession: I do all the time. Last 2-lb. loaf was whole wheat and fruit bread, that's chopped dried apricots, apples, and cranberries. Deeelish!

TPBM churns their own butter. In a modern way, of course.

I churned it with a churn and plunger, once! It was pretty bad. Those damn Foxfire books don'tcha know.

TPBM consults a palmist.

I KNEW you were going to ask that!



TPBM has food nearby.

>374 2wonderY: Faceplam!

The kitchen is 10 steps away, does that count?

///>375 SomeGuyInVirginia: good one!///

TPBM counts on it.

Yes, although my kitchen is about 20 steps away.

TPBM has all the ingredients to make one of their favorite dishes.

Observing Shrove Tuesday, but not Lent, I am still on a pancake roll. Tonight's effort will be pancakes topped with blue cheese and caramelised onions - the ingredients are all waiting.

TPBM is an accomplished pancake tosser

You betcha. Back in the day when I was a grill cook for a little local diner I was an accomplished pancake tosser, egg flipper and griddle extraordinaire. Nothing like the smell of your hair and clothes after cooking over a grill in a 90-100 degree heat (no air conditioning in the kitchen then). Sweat infused with bacon and French fry grease. Oh, I don't long for the good old days.

TPBM can ______.

cha cha !

TPBM can can-can.

In my youth. Now I think it would send me to the emergency room. Or maybe just the orthopedist.

TPBM is a can-do person.

Well, very versatile within the library job
environment anyway: Public Services,
Cataloging, Reference, etc;
I've been everything
from book-shelving drudge to the head
librarian.

"There's not much 'jack'* for a
jack-of-all-trades"* is definitely NOT
TPBM's favorite quote.

*a title used by mid-century columnist Billy Rose

Nope. Although, for reason or reasons I don't understand, I find comfort and awe in 'And the evening and the morning were the first day'.

TPBM quotes frequently.

I'm not that learned :-\

TPBM is more erudite.

Maybe yes, maybe no, maybe I just like aphorisms.

TPBM knows there's no 'maybe' about it...

Perhaps. "We'll see," said the Zen master.

TPBM is certain of uncertainty, will provide proof, maybe.

The more you know, the better you know you know nothing.

TPBM is a specialist in __________

Nocturnal Grocery replenishment.

TPBM wouldn't mind being a __________ specialist.

I would love to be a specialist in restoring works on paper (art or books) but I haven't got the finicky temperament or the flair for organization I fear it would require to do it well.

TPBM is either very finicky or very organized.

Not very, but some of both. I love Microsoft Excel.

TPBM is a whiz.

No, just cheesy.

TPBM snacks.

Much more than I should.

TPBM has a knack for ______________.

Baking, to keep the food theme going. I always bake from scratch - biscuits, cookies, pie crusts, even angel food cakes.

TPBM has a knack for ____________.

Not baking. If not baking were a sport, I could go gold.

TPBM easily puts __________ together.

Two and two

There are no flies on TPBM, are there?

In Florida Dear Abbott? Not in February only Rain-spiders, Mossies, Deer-ticks, Squirrel fleas and the occasional black snake across the shoes.

TPBM can add to this wildlife list.

Well, the yard guy woke up a lizard in the back yard. It was pretty groggy for a while. I haven't checked to day to see if it found a new place to continue sleeping. Of course, we are setting record heat temperatures so maybe it will stay awake. Otherwise, just the usual birds, coyotes, javelina, etc...

The person below me has a different wildlife list.

A bit too cold out to check that at the moment. Yesterday I went out wearing two shirts, a fleece jacket, leggings under my jeans, three hats, two shawls, a fluffy scarf, mittens, and a parka -- all to go catsit for someone who's closer to the subway than I am.

The person below me has their own cold-weather adventure to tell us about.

What is this 'cold weather' you speak of? I'm double-dosing myself with anti-histamines to get through the days. At least the warm weather means yesterday's zoo visit was pleasant.

TPBM will share a funny zoo story.

It was the first date for me and MrsHouseLibrary.

TPBM groks the irony in that.

You wanted to create an impression. How sweet.

TPBM wants a picture of >398 AnnaClaire:

Only so I can be smug about leaving NY.

TPBM remembers snowsuits.

Yes, I wore snowpants on my walk Saturday because temps were close to the negative side and windchill made it brrrrrr... Today was a real treat with about another 6-8 inches of the not so fluffy white stuff dumped on us. Was an hour and a half late for work because had to wait for snowplow to make it out of my driveway. Good times.

TPBM is the one person who likes February.

No, it's probably my least favorite month- gloomy, damp, and cold. Yuk.

TPBM thinks spring is in the air.

There was a fat and sassy robin fighting the starlings for bread yesterday, in six inches of snow. Here's hoping!

TPBM thinks March will be just as gloomy, damp and cold.

No, it will be cheerful, damp, and warm.

(>403 morningwalker: That person would be my husband. February is usually the best month for snowmobiling.)

TPBM feels the damp in their bones.

//>406 SylviaC: and skiing, but I prefer to stay inside and read where it's warm and cozy. In fact I wouldn't mind winter at all if I could just stay inside.//

Reminds me of the late, lamented Flanders and Swann and their view of the weather -

January brings the snow,
Makes your feet and fingers glow.

February's ice and sleet
Freeze the toes right off your feet.

Welcome March with wintry wind
Would thou wert not so unkind!

April brings the sweet spring showers,
On and on for hours and hours.

and so on and so on......

TPBM whistles a happy tune