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A Complicated Kindness by Miriam Toews
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A Complicated Kindness (2004)

by Miriam Toews

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1,814523,854 (3.64)189
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    The Romance Reader by Pearl Abraham (nessreader)
    nessreader: Both first person coming of age novels about young girls in repressive religous communities.
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» See also 189 mentions

Showing 1-5 of 52 (next | show all)
I just never connected to this book in any meaningful way. I found myself reading it more because it felt like something I should read, rather then because I wanted to spend more time in this book's world. I suppose it says something good about my own life that I didn't find much to relate to in Nomi, but I think that made the book less compelling. ( )
  duchessjlh | Sep 4, 2017 |
interesting, surprising and very moving ( )
  Deborahrs | Apr 15, 2017 |
Nomi Nickel's soliloquy about her life in a Mennonite community shows a combination of innocence and gullibility along with wisdom and awareness that makes her believable. Toews speaks with a personal knowledge of life in a Mennonite community and Nomi is the perfect person to tell the story. She rebels against the absurdities uttered by church elders and her school principal yet the tourists who come to stare at the quaint village are no more reasonable. With limited exposure to outside influences, these people form the extent of Nomi's worldly knowledge. No wonder she is confused and cynical. Toews' characters are all well-drawn but Nomi is a masterpiece of humour and heartache. She will remain in my thoughts for a long time. ( )
1 vote VivienneR | May 10, 2016 |
Much hype led me to this book, but I was terribly disappointed. This was a terrible book, and though I did get through it, I really couldn't engage in the story. ( )
  junepearl | Mar 4, 2016 |
Very well written and deserving of the awards given. It opened up old wounds for me. I would have given this book a 5 star rating if it hadn't left me feeling so raw. ( )
  Marion_B | Jan 19, 2016 |
Showing 1-5 of 52 (next | show all)
Those of us who felt oppressed as teenagers can easily recall how any act of rule-bending, whether it was puffing a cigarette or starting an ill-advised romance, could seem an enormous yet thrilling risk of outsized proportions.
 
[Toews] has produced a work of fiction that resounds with truth.... That is at once a profoundly funny book, and a profoundly sad one, which will often leave readers wondering if they should laugh or cry.
added by GYKM | editWinnipeg Free Press
 
Unforgettable.
added by GYKM | editPeople
 
Exquisitely written and faceted.... Heartbreaking and humorous... From beginning to end the book is unusually calibrated and incredibly compelling.
added by GYKM | editThe Guardian
 
A darkly funny and provocative novel.
added by GYKM | editO, The Oprah Magazine
 
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To Marj
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I live with my father, Ray Nickel, in that low brick bungalow out on highway number twelve.
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Life being what it is, one dreams of revenge.
Love is everything. And I think that we all use whatever is in our power, whatever is within our reach, to attempt to keep alive the love we've felt.
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Amazon.com Product Description (ISBN 0676976131, Paperback)

Sixteen-year-old Nomi Nickel longs to hang out with Lou Reed and Marianne Faithfull in New York City’s East Village. Instead she’s trapped in East Village, Manitoba, a small town whose population is Mennonite: “the most embarrassing sub-sect of people to belong to if you’re a teenager.” East Village is a town with no train and no bar whose job prospects consist of slaughtering chickens at the Happy Family Farms abattoir or churning butter for tourists at the pioneer village. Ministered with an iron fist by Nomi’s uncle Hans, a.k.a. The Mouth of Darkness, East Village is a town that’s tall on rules and short on fun: no dancing, drinking, rock ’n’ roll, recreational sex, swimming, make-up, jewellery, playing pool, going to cities or staying up past nine o’clock.

As the novel begins, Nomi struggles to cope with the back-to-back departures three years earlier of Tash, her beautiful and mouthy sister, and Trudie, her warm and spirited mother. She lives with her father, Ray, a sweet yet hapless schoolteacher whose love is unconditional but whose parenting skills amount to benign neglect. Father and daughter deal with their losses in very different ways. Ray, a committed elder of the church, seeks to create an artificial sense of order by reorganizing the city dump late at night. Nomi, on the other hand, favours chaos as she tries to blunt her pain through “drugs and imagination.” Together they live in a limbo of unanswered questions.

Nomi’s first person narrative shifts effortlessly between the present and the past. Within the present, Nomi goes through the motions of finishing high school while flagrantly rebelling against Mennonite tradition. She hangs out on Suicide Hill, hooks up with a boy named Travis, goes on the Pill, wanders around town, skips class and cranks Led Zeppelin. But the past is never far from her mind as she remembers happy times with her mother and sister — as well as the painful events that led them to flee town. Throughout, in a voice both defiant and vulnerable, she offers hilarious and heartbreaking reflections on life, death, family, faith and love.

Eventually Nomi’s grief — and a growing sense of hypocrisy — cause her to spiral ever downward to a climax that seems at once startling and inevitable. But even when one more loss is heaped on her piles of losses, Nomi maintains hope and finds the imagination and willingness to envision what lies beyond.

Few novels in recent years have generated as much excitement as A Complicated Kindness. Winner of the Governor General’s Award and a Giller Prize Finalist, Miriam Toews’s third novel has earned both critical acclaim and a long and steady position on our national bestseller lists. In the Globe and Mail, author Bill Richardson writes the following: “There is so much that’s accomplished and fine. The momentum of the narrative, the quality of the storytelling, the startling images, the brilliant rendering of a time and place, the observant, cataloguing eye of the writer, her great grace. But if I had to name Miriam Toews’s crowning achievement, it would be the creation of Nomi Nickel, who deserves to take her place beside Daisy Goodwill Flett, Pi Patel and Hagar Shipley as a brilliantly realized character for whom the reader comes to care, okay, comes to love.”


This town is so severe. And silent. It makes me crazy, the silence. I wonder if a person can die from it. The town office building has a giant filing cabinet full of death certificates that say choked to death on his own anger or suffocated from unexpressed feelings of unhappiness. Silentium. People here just can’t wait to die, it seems. It’s the main event. The only reason we’re not all snuffed at birth is because that would reduce our suffering by a lifetime. My guidance counsellor has suggested to me that I change my attitude about this place and learn to love it. But I do, I told her. Oh, that’s rich, she said. That’s rich. . .

We’re Mennonites. After Dukhobors who show up naked in court we are the most embarrassing sub-sect of people to belong to if you’re a teenager. Five hundred years ago in Europe a man named Menno Simons set off to do his own peculiar religious thing and he and his followers were beaten up and killed or forced to conform all over Holland, Poland, and Russia until they, at least some of them, finally landed right here where I sit. Imagine the least well-adjusted kid in your school starting a breakaway clique of people whose manifesto includes a ban on the media, dancing, smoking , temperate climates, movies, drinking, rock’n’roll, having sex for fun, swimming, makeup, jewellery, playing pool, going to cities, or staying up past nine o’clock. That was Menno all over. Thanks a lot, Menno.
—from A Complicated Kindness


From the Hardcover edition.

(retrieved from Amazon Thu, 12 Mar 2015 18:01:48 -0400)

(see all 3 descriptions)

Doomed to work at the Happy Family Farm, a chicken slaughterhouse in a town run by religious fundamentalists, sixteen-year-old Nomi Nickel nevertheless manages to bear witness to the dissolution of her family with a dark, sly wit.

» see all 2 descriptions

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