The Hour I First Believed
by Wally Lamb
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Relocating to a family farm in Connecticut after surviving the Columbine school shootings, Caelum and Maureen discover a cache of family memorabilia dating back five generations, which reveals to Caelum unexpected truths about painful past events.Tags
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If I had known what this book was about before I read it, well, I probably still would have read it as I am a fan of Wally Lamb's but I would have been better prepared for the emotional rawness that resulted. Lamb's real life experience with female prison inmates comes to light, fictionalized of course, but his experience shines through in his words.
'The Hour I First Believed' is the story of Caelum Quirk's life, in a nutshell; his life from just before the shooting at Columbine in 1999 to the lasting ramifications for him and for his wife as well as flashbacks as Caelum discovers his family's history.
I found the novel engrossing and strong, the strong, real life subject matter never overwhelming the main point of the story, that of show more Caelum's journey of self-discovery. Lamb is a commanding, beautiful writer and his characters are flawed, sometimes infuriatingly so, but are also terrifyingly real. The narrator is not a shining beacon of humanity but he is so real that the reader understand every mistake he makes, empathizes and follows along, desperate be there when he finds his own conclusion.
The end was both sad and satisfying, leaving me with a wistful feeling, like when one leaves behind family after a great visit but with much to mull over. Wally Lamb, as always, has created a complicated, thought-provoking novel that leaves the reader glad to have picked the book up in the first place. show less
'The Hour I First Believed' is the story of Caelum Quirk's life, in a nutshell; his life from just before the shooting at Columbine in 1999 to the lasting ramifications for him and for his wife as well as flashbacks as Caelum discovers his family's history.
I found the novel engrossing and strong, the strong, real life subject matter never overwhelming the main point of the story, that of show more Caelum's journey of self-discovery. Lamb is a commanding, beautiful writer and his characters are flawed, sometimes infuriatingly so, but are also terrifyingly real. The narrator is not a shining beacon of humanity but he is so real that the reader understand every mistake he makes, empathizes and follows along, desperate be there when he finds his own conclusion.
The end was both sad and satisfying, leaving me with a wistful feeling, like when one leaves behind family after a great visit but with much to mull over. Wally Lamb, as always, has created a complicated, thought-provoking novel that leaves the reader glad to have picked the book up in the first place. show less
Do you ever go to a buffet that's so full of good food that you take some of everything and end up eating so much that you make yourself sick? Imagine that you've gone to an intellectual buffet with Wally Lamb who insists on loading your plate with idea after idea, digression after digression. Everything is good and tasty, but there's just too much. Lamb doesn't know when to stop. He thinks he has access to so much information he just has to share with the reader who, after all, may have no other books to read so no way to get a taste of all the delightful knowledge he's gained throughout years of research. Lucky readers, he has fed us, and fed us all too well. Only half way through the book my nausea began to rise. PTSD, school show more shootings, bullying, war, homosexuality, sibings,substance abuse, marriage, man-woman relationships, prison reform, the civil war, slavery, the history of Bavaria, Rheingold beer, creative writing, sculpting, suffragettes, donuts vs bagels, corn mazes, life quests, religion, psychiatry - now that I have finished I understand how force-fed geese feel. I have become Wally Lamb foie gras, but my suffering is over. Never again will I dine at Lamb's overstuffed table. show less
5 shining glorious stars! This is the best book I’ve read in years! Little did I know that I have had this treasure sitting on my shelves for years, and little did I know that I should have read it long ago. This book is one that will tear you down and then build you up again, over and over. I could not put it down, and I could never anticipate the next catastrophic event that would bring me down to earth again. The best book I’ve ever read that shows the resilience of human nature, and their strength. Caelum Quirk is a true anti- hero and we are there with him every step of the way as disaster after disaster hits him, and we’re there as he picks himself up, dusts himself off and then we go into the fray with him again. It all show more begins when Caelum’s wife Maureen is a victim of the Columbine shootings in Colorado. Even though she’s not injured during the whole thing, she is irrevocably changed for the rest of her life. And Caelum, as her husband, is also changed. That, coupled with the distressing illuminations from the unearthing of his old family archives and the devastating secrets buried there, put him on the edge of despair. We see the strength of the human race as he slowly claws himself out of the abyss. This is a book that I will remember forever, and darn it, now I have to read all Wally Lamb’s backlist in order to try to assimilate the brilliance of this author. Highly recommend! show less
This is one whopper of a book – 700+ pages – crammed with more themes than a magician’s hat has rabbits: post-traumatic stress, chaos theory, classic mythology, physical and spiritual labyrinths, family history, blood sacrifice, substance abuse, what makes a marriage, the American penal system, race relations, the search for spiritual peace, a decades-old mystery, and the recurrent and inexplicable appearance of praying mantis images.
In less skilled hands, it would be a hot mess. It’s to Lamb’s credit that he manages to keep it all together and keep it readable, though at times when he pulls yet another rabbit out of the hat, the reader is hard-pressed to restrain a “what now?” groan.
Ultimately, by the end, the main show more character finds peace when he realizes that life, like a labyrinth, is “baffling on the ground [but] begins to make sense when you can begin to rise above it.”
It’s a big, chewy, thoughtful book with a lot to consider. Don’t expect to polish this one off over a weekend, and don’t expect to get its questions out of your mind quickly. show less
In less skilled hands, it would be a hot mess. It’s to Lamb’s credit that he manages to keep it all together and keep it readable, though at times when he pulls yet another rabbit out of the hat, the reader is hard-pressed to restrain a “what now?” groan.
Ultimately, by the end, the main show more character finds peace when he realizes that life, like a labyrinth, is “baffling on the ground [but] begins to make sense when you can begin to rise above it.”
It’s a big, chewy, thoughtful book with a lot to consider. Don’t expect to polish this one off over a weekend, and don’t expect to get its questions out of your mind quickly. show less
AUDIOBOOK LISTENERS BE WARNED: There is an afterword, notes and acknowledgements from the author in the physical book
"The Hour I First Believed, explores chaos theory by interfacing several generations of a fictional Connecticut family with such nonfictional American events as the Civil War, the Columbine High School shootings, the Iraq War, and Hurricane Katrina. "
"My soul was a burden, bruised and bleeding. It was tired of the man who carried it, but I found no place to set it down to rest. Neither the charm of the countryside nor the sweet scents of a garden could soothe it. It found no peace in song or laughter, none in the company of friends at table or in the pleasures of love, none even in books or poetry.... Where could my heart show more find refuge from itself? Where could I go, yet leave myself behind?" - Augustine of Hippo
Does that passage speak to you Dr. Patel asks Maureen. Mo nodded and began to cry. "And so, Mr. Caelum, good-bye." (pg 319)
I wish we all had access to a Dr. Patel in our lives. show less
"The Hour I First Believed, explores chaos theory by interfacing several generations of a fictional Connecticut family with such nonfictional American events as the Civil War, the Columbine High School shootings, the Iraq War, and Hurricane Katrina. "
"My soul was a burden, bruised and bleeding. It was tired of the man who carried it, but I found no place to set it down to rest. Neither the charm of the countryside nor the sweet scents of a garden could soothe it. It found no peace in song or laughter, none in the company of friends at table or in the pleasures of love, none even in books or poetry.... Where could my heart show more find refuge from itself? Where could I go, yet leave myself behind?" - Augustine of Hippo
Does that passage speak to you Dr. Patel asks Maureen. Mo nodded and began to cry. "And so, Mr. Caelum, good-bye." (pg 319)
I wish we all had access to a Dr. Patel in our lives. show less
Incredibly, relentlessly grim — tragedy upon tragedy upon tragedy, almost to the point of comedy, the sickest of jokes. Allow me to present a list of only some of the terrible things that these people do/have done to them/live through (SPOILERS): adultery, aggravated assault, the Columbine shootings, post-traumatic stress disorder, death in the family, forced prostitution, Hurricane Katrina, more adultery, drug addiction, vehicular homicide, prison, sexual assault, war, miscarriage, death of a spouse, suicide, dead babies in a suitcase aaaaaaggghhh I can’t take any more. Can’t these people catch a break?! It just piles up and up. And then? The worst part? The last twenty pages turn on a dime and everything starts looking up! Seven show more hundred pages of grinding, ceaseless misery, and suddenly people are laughing, joking, getting married, having babies, coming to terms with things. An unsatisfying and unpleasantly jarring end.
I do not like writing bad reviews, but after reading and very much enjoying two of Lamb's other novels, this one was a disappointment. show less
I do not like writing bad reviews, but after reading and very much enjoying two of Lamb's other novels, this one was a disappointment. show less
This was an emotional trip back to 1999 and Columbine High School. Lamb has the ability to suck the reader into the story so one feels the anguish in the aftermath of tragedy. By focusing on a school nurse who saved herself by hiding, he could relate how post-stress disorder can totally disrupt a person's life along with the lives of the people around them. This kind of deep pain just doesn't go away.
Lamb binds together a painful story with elements of fact and fiction, mythology, nature, and long-held family secrets. But hope and love form the soul of this unforgettable epic. Unforgettable, but not Lamb's best work. The backstory of Caelum's famy was marginally interesting, however, it made the book overly long and fragmented. This was show more Maureen's story, and I wish the focus had remained on her struggle for healing her fractured life. show less
Lamb binds together a painful story with elements of fact and fiction, mythology, nature, and long-held family secrets. But hope and love form the soul of this unforgettable epic. Unforgettable, but not Lamb's best work. The backstory of Caelum's famy was marginally interesting, however, it made the book overly long and fragmented. This was show more Maureen's story, and I wish the focus had remained on her struggle for healing her fractured life. show less
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Author Information
14+ Works 33,088 Members
Walter (Wally) Lamb was born in Norwich, Connecticut on October 17, 1950. He attended the University of Connecticut, receiving a B.A. in 1972 and an M.A. in 1977; he also earned an M.F.A. from Vermont College in 1984. Lamb has written numerous short stories, most notably "Astronauts", which received both the Pushcart Prize and the University of show more Missouri's William Peden Prize in 1990. He is also the author of the bestselling novels She's Come Undone, I Know This Much Is True, The Hour I First Believed and We Are Water. Lamb writes stories, he says, because he sometimes hears another voice in his head and feels the need to tell that character's story. He made The New York Times Best Seller List with his title We are Water. However, he feels an equally strong calling to teach, and has no plans to become a fulltime writer. He has taught English at the Norwich Free Academy since 1972, and for many years directed the Academy's writing center, which he also played a major role in creating. The idea for it developed as he became more involved in fiction writing himself and realized that the common methods of teaching composition, which involved grading a paper and commenting on it after the student was finished, were not particularly helpful. He set up a program that allowed students to get feedback from both teachers and peers early in the writing process, so that they could incorporate the suggestions into their final work. He currently teaches creative writing at the University of Connecticut. He is also the volunteer facilitator of a writing workshop at the York Correctional Institution. (Bowker Author Biography) show less
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- Canonical title
- The Hour I First Believed
- Original publication date
- 2008
- People/Characters
- Caelum Quirk; Maureen Quirk; Louella "Lolly" Quirk; Velvet Hoon; Moses; Janis (show all 7); Alphonse Buzzi
- Important places
- New Haven, Connecticut, USA; Littleton, Colorado, USA
- Important events
- Columbine School Shootings
- Epigraph
- And so, they moved over the dark waves, and even before they disembarked, new hordes gathered there. — Dante's Inferno, canto 3, lines 118-120
- Dedication
- For Anna —
A series of debilitating strokes and the onset of dementia necessitated the agonizing conversation I had with my mother in the winter of 1997. When I told her she'd be moving to a nearby nursing home, she... (show all) shook her head and, atypically, began to cry. Tears were a rarity for my stoic Sicilian-American mother. The next day, she offered me a deal. "Okay, I'll go," she said. "But my refrigerator comes with me." I couldn't meet her demand, but I understood it.
Ma's refrigerator defined her. The freezer was stockpiled with half-gallons of ice cream for the grandkids, and I do mean stockpiled; you opened that freezer compartment at your peril, hoping those dozen or so rock-hard bricks, precariously stacked, wouldn't tumble forth and give you a concussion. The bottom half of Ma's "icebox" was a gleaming tribute to aluminum--enough foil-wrapped Italian food to feed, should we all show up unexpectedly at once, her own family and the extended families of her ten siblings. But it was the outside of Ma's fridge that best spoke of who she was. The front and sides were papered with greeting cards, holy pictures, and photos, old and new, curling and faded, of all the people she knew and loved. Children were disproportionately represented in her refrigerator photo gallery. She adored kids—her own and everyone else's. My mother was a woman of strong faith, quiet resolve, and easy and frequent laughter.
This story's been a hard one to write, Ma, and it got harder after you left us. But I had the title from the very beginning, and when I reached the end, I realized I'd written it for you.
(P.S. Sorry about all those four-letter words, Ma. That's the characters speaking. Not me.) - First words
- They were both working their final shift at Blackjack Pizza that night, although nobody but the two of them realized it was that.
- Last words
- (Click to show. Warning: May contain spoilers.)Yes, that was when and how it happened. That was the hour I first believed.
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