Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway

A girlfriend in grad school gave me this book, shortly before we parted ways, in fact. It was a real eye-opener to me that I lived much of my life hovering around the perimeter of the pool rather than jumping in with both feet.

Most eye-opening for me, though, was it was the first time I had been taught that fear was fine - embrace it, don't dodge it. Then, walk through the fire anyway.

I'm not saying I turned into Russell Crowe from "Gladiator" because of it. I'm still more Woody Allen from "Annie Hall", but the book did fuel me toward some braver choices in life, and I think it's a great read - not too clinical, not too esoteric - just good guidance through learning to live with the beast that resides in everyone's anxiety closet.

Hate self-help but read it anyway. Some of the basic tenets of 'Feel the fear and do it anyway' are sound. And the first few chapters, devoted specifically addressing fear, are worth reading. I've just got sand in my dreamcatcher and draw the line at nonsense like the law of attraction. Of which there is plenty in this book. Including the half-baked notion that anger causes cancer, all negativity is evil and wrong and the usual Pollyanna rubbish about positive thinking. It may be horseshit but horseshit has its uses — like compost.

While this book doesn't offer any miracle cures - none of the self help tomes that are so popular today do - it gave me a lot to think about. Dr. Jeffers puts a lot of emphasis on taking risks, making choices, and always moving forward with your life. She says that change is a positive, powerful force, especially when it feels scary. But the key in her teachings is the simple fact that action always comes before fearlessness. If you wait until you're no longer afraid to do something, you'll never do it. Because there is no such thing as not being afraid, but it is possible to not let fear rule your life.

Typical trite "mind over matter" self-help pablum. For example, the premise that we'll be better off and happy adopting "when life gives you lemons make lemonade" as the way to deal with serious illness, financial ruin, or the death of a loved one. Gee, thanks. And of course replete with numerous infomercial style anecdotal success stories, and relationship advice that belongs in a magazine sold in the supermarket check-out line.

The effectiveness of this book begins with its title, because it resonates with all of us as we struggle with our fears. These are not real fears, such as when we are in mortal danger. They are rather those nagging insecurities that we know are irrational, but which nonetheless hold us back. The title acknowledges these fears and tells you in no uncertain terms what to do about them. Your fears need not be an impediment, if you consciously work to proceed in spite of them.
After reading this book, I boldly went out and organised a holiday for family and friends. The holiday was pretty disastrous, as I recall, with foul weather and people being difficult, but I was still amazed that the content of a book had directly propelled me into show more action.
Since then, I have a new maxim, based on the same premise, which is: "Proceed on the basis of a favourable outcome."
...because if you don't proceed (i.e. do it anyway) there is absolutely NO chance of a favourable outcome. GO FOR IT! show less

Feel the Fear not only empowers by showing ways to shift one's perspective, it reminds us that we always have a choice in every situation and not choosing is a choice in itself. Sometimes it's easy to lose touch with our power to choose, to allow fear to stop us in our tracks. Jeffers offers practical exercises to re-focus and re-channel one's fear into something that helps instead of hinders. And she reminds us that it's a journey, not a destination, so facing and embracing fear will be a lifelong adventure.

4 stars

The first part of the book is great: understanding how to manage fear and learning that this can become anticipation after plenty of practice. It is always 'easier said than done', but the book offers a great mind shift in knowing there is no need to wait for the fear to go first before doing something.