Emily X. R. Pan

Grief, regret, and loneliness form the backdrop of a family’s life following a suicide, but a path for healing reveals itself in the form of a magical red bird.

Fifteen-year-old Leigh Chen Sanders, daughter of an Irish-American sinologist father and a Taiwanese pianist mother, is in love with her best friend, Axel Moreno. The two have much in common: as well as sharing a passion for art, he is half Filipino and half Puerto Rican and also stands out in their racially homogeneous school. show more However, a rift has opened between them since their first kiss coincided with the day Leigh’s mother took her own life. Now left alone with a distant, judgmental father, Leigh is directed by a red bird she is convinced is her mother to visit her estranged grandparents in Taiwan. There, she seeks out places that were meaningful to her mother and uncovers long-hidden family secrets. The Taiwanese setting is enticingly portrayed, and the magical realism of the bird spirit offers transportive flashback journeys into the family’s history. The stigma of mental illness and the terrible loneliness of not being accepted form the heart of this emotionally honest tale, but the device of having Leigh express her feelings in terms of color is distracting and adds little to the story.

An evocative novel that captures the uncertain, unmoored feeling of existing between worlds—culturally, linguistically, ethnically, romantically, and existentially—it is also about seeking hope and finding beauty even in one’s darkest hours. (author’s note, resources) (Fiction. 14-18)

-Kirkus Review show less

Take a whiff of Romeo and Juliet, couple it with an archer worthy of Robin Hood's Merry Men and we're off. Hunter and Luna, two teens whose families detest each other, must deal with strange things creating large cracks and crevices in the roads and woods in their community. Multitudes of fireflies hover around Luna, while Hunter is constantly berated and humiliated by his parents. Still, he's able to hit anything with an arrow. While this isn't exactly a marketable skill in his community, show more it serves as a great stress management tool.
When circumstances bring the two close, their wariness soon becomes an understanding, then a trust, followed by serious romantic attraction. Meanwhile their families are festering about each other, Luna's parents have her fast tracked to Stanford, completely ignoring her feelings and wants, and Hunter's parents are getting more paranoid by the day.
As the history of both families is revealed, the fallout from an event halfway around the world comes to play a big part in the story as does the appearance of a truly evil bad guy. Meanwhile, Luna and Hunter are trying to figure out how to have a future together. What that future is will surprise most readers as well as giving them plenty to pause and contemplate after they close the cover. show less

Contemporary fiction with mystical components about a teenage girl struggling in the aftermath of her mother’s suicide. Protagonist Leigh Chen Sanders is visited by an unusual bird that she believes to be her mother or her mother’s spirit. The bird plays a role in Leigh and her father traveling to Taipei to visit her maternal grandparents, whom she has never met since her mother had been estranged from her parents for two decades. The novel delves into some weighty topics such as show more suicide, depression, guilt, dysfunctional family relationships, and identity.

Though set in Taipei, the structure involves flashbacks, multiple timelines, and recall of memories. This is a tricky structure, and the author pulls it off admirably. The characters are believable, flawed but likeable, and well-developed. This book is written in a fluid and lyrical style. I particularly liked the author’s descriptions of the sights, sounds, customs, spirituality, and food of Taiwan. It imparted a strong sense of the Taiwanese culture, which is an important part of Leigh’s search for identity.

This is the third book I’ve read this year that employs synesthesia (not sure if this is a trend or coincidence), in this case seeing colors when other senses are stimulated. I felt the author used these colors in combination with elements of the supernatural in order to diffuse the intensity of the subject matter. To me, this book is a representation of Leigh’s personal journey toward acceptance. Metaphors are plentiful and it requires the suspension of disbelief in order to fully appreciate it. I wish it had not included the teen friend/more than friend relationship with Axel, as I felt it detracted from the more substantive material.

Overall, this book shows how family relationships, art, and love can aid healing. I found it a compassionate exploration of grief and recommend it, although not immediately after experiencing a loss. show less

Beautiful and unique writing style. The mom's depression was hard to witness with the highs and lows, and her friends were... unique. I especially was into the backstory in the states, but the dream imagery and a lot with the bird and Taiwan lost me at times. Still, a good book on exploring the complexities and scopes of grief. It reminds me of my friend's mother dying last year a bit. she texted me that week she had so many new birds suddenly all over outside her house and she felt it was show more something with her mom. Any book dealing with the suicide of a loved one will of course be sobering. The author writes beautifully and despite a larger page count, this book reads quickly due to the writing style and short chapter technique. Matching the title, the colors referenced all the time and painting emotions wasn't fully my thing, but it was unique. show less