Howard Mittelmark

An uproarious, clever, and helpful book, How Not to Write a Novel tackles the most common mistakes people make when sitting down to compose their magnum opus. With a deft humor, the authors caricature the most offensive mistakes in fake excerpts before explaining where it all went so wrong.

As a writing tutor, I often find myself wishing I could pull this book out to teach my students what not to do!

Any writer, be they an aspiring novelist or mere hobbyist, will appreciate this book and find show more it hilarious as well as helpful. show less

Do you ever finish a novel and wonder if the raving quotes on the back were the result of a ransom request rather than those famous and reliable people actually liking the book?
The cover is bad. And the novel didn't lean hard enough into the self-aware semi-philosophical monologues, definitely its strong suit.

There are plenty of suggestions here, some of them obscure enough to be intriguing. The authors had an excellent idea—somewhat like Nancy Pearl’s books, where reading one thing leads you to another, and then two more, and so on. However, a lot of the humor is sophomoric at best, and sometimes downright offensive. Read it for the push toward forgotten books.

Not only is this the funniest writing advice book I've ever read (the authors must be very gifted writers to write so hilariously badly) but it is also, I think, going to be one of the most useful. As it says in the afterword, if you follow all the advice on what not to do, "You could hold both Harper and Collins hostage without a chance of their employees ever agreeing to print a book on which your name appears. If Mr. Random were desperate to sleep with you, Mr. House would still step in show more to make sure he did not publish your novel."

The authors, both of them very familiar with the publishing industry, go over dozens of common problems in amateur fiction, why they should not be done, and how to do otherwise. All in all, a winner. show less