Justine Larbalestier

If it wasn't for the lame romance in this book, I would have given it 5 stars, as the romance, losing my virginity gush gush inter-race mushy stuff and the swearing so detracts from the main story - that of Che trying to teach his 10 year old sister how to act like a normal person and not the psychopath that she is.
Truly chilling are the conversations between Che and his sister where the lack of empathy and moral compass shine through. Arguing with a genius with only a view of black and show more white, no grey , is absolutely horrifying as you can see the logic behind her answers and the way she manipulates Che's words with future terrible actions. (For example : she promises she won't kill anything but convinces her best friend to kill her own guinea pig!)
The end of the book is fantastic as we put the pieces together - I LOVE when I don't guess the answer until it is staring at me in the face - that is the mark of a truly excellent writer and if only Larbalestier had left out the boxing girl and romance and concentrated on the friendship with the lesbian Korean instead! show less

I really, desperately wanted to like this book. Probably because the premise seemed interesting- a story told by a compulsive liar trying to convince the reader of the truth. Ha! If only the description on the book jacket had been true: "Taking readers deep into the psyche of a young woman..." The only thing the reader will be deeply into is frustration- because while the premise may seem intriguing, once you realize that the protagonist, Micah, is a conceited b*tch that only lies for show more attention, and once you're halfway through the book and still have no more information than you had on page one, you'll want to slap Micah across the face and scream, "TELL THE TRUTH!" But the worst part of the book by far is the "big twist" a little more than halfway through. By this point, I was flipping pages desperately trying to find something interesting, something that would make me keep reading- and I found it. Except that it had the opposite effect on me- it was so absurdly bizarre that I closed the book and actually threw it across the room. Nobody will be able to see that twist coming... Probably because it's so LUDICROUS and HOPELESSLY OUT-OF-PLACE that it will most likely make you react the way I did. I won't spoil it, but let's just say it's the equivalent of reading Snow White, and the last page saying, "JK guys, everything you just read was false, Snow White is actually the evil queen and the evil queen is Snow White cause they switched bodies but I forgot to tell you about it, and the seven dwarves are really demons, and everyone lives in a house floating in the sky. Bet you didn't see that coming! Hope ya liked the book K bye." Please, please don't read this book. It suckers you in with the promise of a journey deep into the psyche, but all you get is a sniveling brat, a drawn-out, told and retold and retold again sequence of events, and a "plot twist" that will make you want to throw this book into a campfire and watch it burn.

(P.S. That was my first review! Sorry if I made it a little rant-y, but I was royally pissed at the author. Forgive me for not making sense, hopefully my reviewing skills get better with practice!) show less

Review courtesy of Dark Faerie Tales

Quick & Dirty: This parody is laugh out loud funny, with a good mystery to keep it interesting! They tried very hard to make it different from other vampire romances while still making fun of them!

Opening Sentence: I wasn’t feeling very enthused about education the day the vampire came to school.

The Review:

There are a lot of really horrible parodies out there. Team Human is not one of them. That being said, it is a parody — do not make the mistake of show more taking it seriously! Mel Duan hates vampires. Her best friend Cathy, however, is in love with one. While Mel tries — really tries — to be rude and unsympathetic to the woes of loving one of the undead, Cathy and Francis’s affection will not be stopped. Cue hilarity, because our 150-year-old brooding vampire and his one true love fit perfectly into the paranormal romance trope — desire to be made immortal and all. Mel took a little while to get into, because she’s over-bearing and annoying, but funny to the point where you eventually give up and decide to like her.

The town this story takes place in has some great world-building. Vampires are completely normal, since it was a town founded during colonial times by vampires. Everyone is used to having a vampire or two around, even if there isn’t much mixing between them and humans. Mel hates vamps and loves the species separation. Believes wholeheartedly in it, in fact. People who want to transition to become one have to be educated, etc. and the government has a whole system set up just for the eager wanna-be vampires. The thing I adored about this? Not all transitions are successful. Something like 10% of people die, which is something I’ve never seen before in a paranormal. There’s a lot in this book I’ve never seen before, actually, because the authors tried really hard to make it more than a parody.

As I emphasized, it’s a parody, but it has a mystery. Mel wants to find the principle’s ex-husband, who’s supposedly run off to be with a hot vampire, but Mel doesn’t htink that’s the real story. And she wants to separate Cathy from Francis at the same time, leaving her hands a little bit full. In comes Kit, a human who was raised by Camille after being left for dead by his real parents. Camille is his mother in everything but blood…and a vampire. I absolutely loved Camille and Mel together. Kit’s adorable, too, but reading his mother and crush together was brilliant.

Which leads me to my next point, which is that Brennan and Larbalestier make an excellent team. Their writing flowed and synced up with each other, churning the book along at the same pace as Mel’s narration — that is to say fast and kind of crazy. Mel has a way of acting before thinking — probably not an asset in a world of vampires, huh? — and there are moments when it jerks the reader around. Overall though, I enjoyed this book. Anything that can make me cry laughing not once, but a dozen times, deserves a recommendation.

Notable Scene:

“Permit me to accompany you home,” Francis said.

“We’re cool,” I said.

“You’re so kind,” said Cathy.

Guess who Francis the Selectively Deaf paid attention to?

I cast an imploring look at Kit and Camille.

“I’m sure Francis has things to do around the house,” I said. “Like his chores? Maybe somebody needs to scrub the toilet?”

“Vampires don’t go to the bathroom,” Kit said gloomily. “So guess whose turn it always is to scrub the toilet?”

FTC Advisory: HarperTeen provided me with a copy of Team Human. No goody bags, sponsorships, “material connections,” or bribes were exchanged for my review. show less

I’ve been slowly dipping my toes back in the vampire genre and I was really intrigued by the premise of Team Human. Vampires and humans co-exist in the world, but our narrator isn’t in love with one of the undead, in fact she is pretty much against them. When her best friend falls in love with a vampire, as far as Mel is concerned, it’s the worst thing that could possibly happen.

Mel is a pretty awesome character. She’s opinionated, so funny, and fiercely loyal to and protective of show more her friends. I liked her right from the start and I really enjoyed seeing everything unfold from her point of view. The vampires here are pretty typical. They can’t go out in the daylight and they drink human blood, but they also try to co-exist with humans peacefully. There is even a vampire police force. So cool. One thing that sets them apart, though, is if the transition to vampire doesn’t work some people turn into zombies. Shuffling, mumbling, and decaying zombies. A Terrible side effect of trying to become a vampire, but a seriously cool aspect to the story.

This book isn’t really action packed, which I was concerned about when I first started read, because I wasn’t sure how it would hold my attention. The thing is, before I realized it, I’d read a hundred pages and it had felt like twenty. It’s so well written and full of so much humor, I just kept flipping the pages to find out what was going to happen next. The mystery that drives the story is a good one, and while I pretty much had it pieced together before it was solved on the page, I still wanted to see how the characters solved it and what the ramifications would be.

As far as I know, this is a standalone, and it works perfectly that way. Everything is wrapped up nicely and the mystery has a satisfying end. If you are someone who loves the vampire genre, someone who doesn’t really care much for it, or someone who is trying to get back into it, I think this book is perfect. It’s just a cool book that was so much fun to read, whether you’re Team Human or Team Vampire :0) show less