Ape's 2013 Challenge (6)

Thread #1 (Book 1)
Thread #2 (Book 2)
Thread #3 (Books 3-4)
Thread #4 (Books 5-7)
Thread #5 (Books 8-9)

Books read: 12
Pages read: 3,651

January:
1. Guns, Germs, and Steel by Jared Diamond
2. The Second Opinion by Michael Palmer
3. Plague by H.W. Bernard
4. The Handmaid's Tale by Margaret Atwood

February:
5. Smoking Ears and Screaming Teeth by Trevor Norton
6. Psychlone by Greg Bear
7. Never Let Me Go by Kazuo Ishiguro
8. Kitchen Confidential by Anthony Bourdain
9. Being Written by William Conescu

March:
10. The Drunken Botanist by Amy Stewart
11. Warm Bodies by Isaac Marion
12. Seventh Son by Orson Scott Card

Nice try. Found you.

First to visit..How about that! My daughter mentioned that they had snow in Beavercreek Ohio and the schools were closed today.

How is the weather your way?

Nora: Eeeep!

Hi Linda! We got a load of snow overnight, but it was quite warm today so most of it melted. :)

You can run, but you cannot hide.

*Hides from Megan*

huh. Turns out you can hide!
*looks left*
*looks right*

Ohhhh, your problems followed you. Call me. Call me. I'm a good practice librarian.

Megan: Bwahahaha... *Realizes he just gave himself away*

Rachel: *Goes back into hiding*

Hiya. You can call me too if you want. I'm a pretty safe bet since I don't look at my cellphone again once I get home from work.

*Hides from Leah*

You can't hide from me if I'm not even paying attention...

10. The Drunken Botanist by Amy Stewart



Pages: 367
Rating: 4/5

Nonfiction: History, Botany, Horticulture, Drunkeness
Owned (Early Reviewer book)

I read Amy Stewart's "Wicked" books a year or two ago and really enjoyed them, I enjoyed them so much I requested (and received) and advanced copy of a book about alcohol, despite being a teetotaler. Even though the topic isn't something I'm exactly enthusiastic about, I still found this to be a very enjoyable read.

The Drunken Botanist covers a wide variety of plants that are used in alcoholic beverages, and it does it in a more readable way than her previous, similarly-formatted books. Whereas Wicked Bugs and Wicked Plants were huge collections of 1- or 2-page articles, this starts out with larger chapters that offer more in-depth information about the history and techniques of brewing alcohols, which does a great job of stringing everything together and makes the overall book feel more comprehensive as a whole. It also offers a bit more variety; whether its history, botany, horticulture, gardening tips, or drink recipes. This diversity does a great job at making an interesting book out of something that could easily get monotonous if the reader isn't completely interested in the topic.

Although I didn't like the subject as much as Wicked Bugs, I am still satisfied after finishing it. I learned a lot, and even as a non-drinker a lot of the information was relevant and fascinating to me. If I enjoyed it as much as I did I can only imagine how good it would be for someone who actually enjoys a drink every once in awhile.

Upgethumbed *hic*

Reposted from last thread:

Stephen, good gracious! Call Jude! A job cataloging a private liberry! And, if Jude is willing, making that catalog available online here on LT as a job reference...weigh in here, liberrians, would that sway y'all's library's hiring folks? And paid at that!

CALL HER NOW!!

Ain't no hidin' even with runnin'.

You can run...but not hide...from me.

I have yet to read any of Amy Stewart's books...so you're "up" on me....

;-}

Sounds like a great book have to add that to my list. come hide on my thread tis quiet there:)

My dear, if you're trying to hide, continuing your thread does not help you much. ;)

I can't believe I missed out on all the rabid sheep talk from your last thread. :( I know you hate movies and all, Stephen, but this is the best sheep-with-rabies movie ever, not that there are a lot of those around, but still. Totally accurate re: sheep. They're evil. ;)

And did Micky call me a nudist? Or was that you? (eyeballs Stephen)

#13: Glad you had a good read! I've been meaning to read her books. I might skip on that one, though (I'm not a drinker); but her other books look interesting. Gracias, perv meister.

Richard: The problem is Jude lives 2+ hours away, and I can't leave Shyanne alone for too long, so if I were to stay away from the house for, say, 8-9 hours, I'd drive 5 hours and 'work' for 3, and that's assuming I didn't speak a word to Jude herself. Not that I wouldn't mind fondling Jude's books for hours at a time. :D

ETA: Okay, Google Maps is saying Jude is 1 hour and 40 minutes away... *Shrug*

Jude: Her books are great to read a side dish to your 'main' read, as they are perfect for dipping into for short stretches.

BBGirl: That sounds like a great idea!

Laura: Every time I switch threads, it's like I'm leaving a trail behind me that all of you can follow or somethig! :P

Sara: Ha! Yeah, that movie looks...odd. I clicked the 'mutant sheep' tag but I'm sad to say that is the only work that feature such a tag.

#18 by @saraslibrary> hehe, that's the movie I mentioned too! It's really spectacularly ridiculous.

>13 Ape: Excellent review, sir. Gave it a thumb.

>18 saraslibrary: Totally Stephen. It's always Stephen. :P

AARRRRRRRRRRRGH!

Ahem. So I just got off the phone with my library, after spending another hour with the phone in my hand. Guess what? I'll have to speak with the director, who isn't there today. So, I get to make ANOTHER call next week.

*Sigh* Well, at least it'll be easier the second time. Maybe. Of course I called in the past to check on a job application and that didn't make it any easier this time, but... *Shrug*

Stephen, CONGRATS on making that phone call! It WILL be easier when you call next week, and hopefully some of the nerves have gone away now. :)

I'm so proud! Way to go!

wooohoooooo!

Whohooo! Congratulations on winning over your nerves! I know it's tough but you did it! You've done it once and you can do it again! Hurrah for Stephen!

Great job, Stephen! You made the call! Whoo hoo!

Am I allowed to assume the fetal position now?

So proud! You made the call and that's HUGE!!!

As for fetal position, go right ahead and curl up. After doing something that stressful, you're entitled. :)

First I agreed with you on your thread and now you are giving me permission to curl up and do nothing on my thread. There is definitely something odd going on...

Yay, congratulations on calling! Definitely a huge step.

Found your new thread, Stephen and overjoyed to discover that you made the call! That is FANTASTIC!

Very very happy for you, Stephen. You took the step. That's excellent, and it's proof positive that going outside the comfort zone is not lethal.

*spoken to Stephen's curled-up dorsal frontage*

Thanks guys.

We can't say that it wasn't lethal just yet, it could be a slow painful death that will take place over the course of several weeks...

So, I'm reading a romance novel and, surprise, I've been in a dark, melancholic mood for the past 2 days. It's a comedic ZOMBIE romance, for crying out loud. -.-

I'm really enjoying the book itself though, so that's something.

Interesting.... are you quite sure it is the book that has put you in this "dark, melancholic mood".... yes, I have to ask this kinds of question, especially since you say you are enjoying it. ;-)

Which book are you reading?

YAY! for Stephen! You can do it!

Interpret that either for reading zombie romance or for your phone call (both completed and to come). YAY STEPHEN. YAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAAYAAYaaaaa!

#20: Great (twisted) minds think alike! ;) Sorry I missed your post on Stephen's previous thread.

#28: I agree: you can curl up in the fetal position now. I'll even sew you a fake vagina for you to crawl in. Hmm. I'm not much of a sewer, though, so how about I just empty a giant bean bag for you to hide in?

#35: So, what pseudo-chick book are you reading?

Well done for making the call. I'm looking forward to your review on the zombie romance book.

I'd like to take this opportunity to point out what Stephen wrote a week ago (the 3rd of March) on the subject of reading a romance novel.

it won't happen. Ever.

And now you're reading one. NAH NAH!

I'm guessing it's Warm Bodies, by the way you're describing it. I'm feeling rather inclined to read it myself.

Lori: Yes, it's the book, it's VERY consistent. I'm incredibly self-conscious to begin with, and reading Romances turns that into more of a self-loathing. I don't think it's entirely unnatural for someone in my circumstance...

Rahcel: Thanks. :)

Sara (and Lori): It's Warm Bodies. *Sigh* You know you think lowly of yourself when you think a smell, brainless zombie is better than you...but he IS pretty awesome.

BBGirl: I'll probably finish it tomorrow...provided I'm capable of reading tomorrow...

Paws: I think it was inevitable that I read Warm Bodies though. I'm also happy to read romances of a more literary variety...but I won't read romance genre fiction, which is what I meant. If there are people having sex on the cover, you can forget it. *Blushes*

41. Oh, Stevie-darling, I'd NEVER tell someone to read a romance genre novel. Bleurgh! I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy. (And Birdsong, which I've just finished isn't that.)

Warm Bodies is not a romance genre novel. It's just as much about zombies and family and friendship and humanity as it is about two people who are in love.

43. That's precisely the point! It's not a romance genre novel but it is a romance story.

Paws: But you see, the reason I avoid romance novels is because of the effect they have on me emotionally, and so if an absurd zombie romance novel can do it than anything can, which is why I avoid anything with the 'romance' tag. I certainly don't enjoy feeling this way, and it will last for days...

Nora: Yeah, that's what I was saying, I'm reading it because it's not a romance genre novel...and I will never read a romance genre novel.

45. I'm not trying to make you read a romance novel. Just novels that might have some romance in them. Which is precisely what you're doing.

Passing through. I see all is as per usual. This is, well, yes...it is.

I guess I shouldn't even ask if you're going to watch the movie version of Warm Bodies? ;) Just keep doing what you're doing--you'll finish the book in no time!

Actually, I went into a bit of a reading frenzy and ended up finishing it earlier today. I can't really concentrate on a review right now though...

I'm SO behind on my reviews! There are books I finished in January that I haven't reviewed yet! And then I managed to finish a few books at the end of Feb...*sigh*

So don't feel bad that you don't want to write a review right NOW.

Warm Bodies is also on my list of TBR.... can't wait for your review....

I finished a book last week and haven't written a review yet. No guilt!

I keep telling myself I'm not going to write review any more, but I can't seem to convince myself not to write one every time I finish a book.

I'm definitely in favor of writing reviews in general, I just meant that you shouldn't feel pressure to write one immediately if you're not in the mood.

I like writing reviews. It takes time, but it's so nice to share them with people and to look back on my own thoughts later.

I agree with both of you, but I'm torn between wanting to have my thoughts down and feeling pressured into writing my thoughts immediately after finishing a book. Anyway, I'm writing now, so I'll probably have it done in a little while. I'm hopeless. :)

i don't like to write reviews.... i'm not good at putting my thoughts on a book together in a way that makes sense.... all I can say it yes I think it was good or no I don't think it was good.... that's usually all I need from someone else too.... unless they are a teacher.... when ever a teacher recommends a book to me I have a hard time reading it.... I think it stems from not liking being told what to read in high school....

Yeah, I hated required reading in high school as well. I've gone back now and enjoyed several of the books I didn't like in high school now, so I was either too immature for the books at the time or I just didn't like being forced to read books I didn't choose myself.

Writing reviews is such good practice at writing.

I think so to! And I pretty much have the same problem I do when I try to write something non-reveiw related. I sit and stare at a blank screen for an hour and then POOF, it's done in a flourish with a copious amount of typos and jarring, brutish sentence structure. :P

I never write "proper" reviews. I admire those who do and I'm very grateful as it helps me when I'm surfing around LT wanting to check if a books is interesting enough to pick up, but I can't do it myself. I jot down a few sentences about what I thought and that's it. I'm not capable of writing lengthier pieces with a synopsis and grades. So I don't.

11. Warm Bodies by Isaac Marion



Pages: 238
Rating: 4/5

Fiction: Zombie Romance
Owned

It's a romance. With zombies. Sparkling ones. I should hate it, I really should. I like my zombies grotesque and frightening, seeping with the effluence of their decay, and visceral in their nightmare-inducing nature. Maybe I'm weird, but I like that. Oh, I can explain it with socially-acceptable excuses, like that I enjoy the dystopian aspects of a zombie apocalypse, or that such books are like wilderness survival novels for a modern, more urban-centric society. It's all true, but there is something about the carnal devouring of human innards by a decomposing corpse that I find indefatigably satisfying. Perhaps I would be more concerned if the genre wasn't so popular right now.

So, why did I like Warm Bodies so much? Well, because I'm a sucker for a story where the 'unlikely' male gets the girl. Being a shy, nerdy, socially awkward bibliophile...well, it's always an appealing fantasy. And you really can't get any more unlikely than a stinking, rotting, bloodthirsty corpse, can you?

Despite the fact that this book strays VERY far away from the popular zombie mythos, treading deep into the murky shark-infested waters of Twilight-esquedness, I really enjoyed this book. I liked the characters, and the awkward relationship, and maybe I even liked the sappy ending a little, even if I have loudly professed my displeasure for such things in the past and will probably continue to do so in the future. I liked it, okay? I liked it I liked it I liked it. There, I said it. Even though romances tend to incite my struggles with social phobias and loneliness, this managed to overcome my emotional instability and resulted in a fun, enjoyable, and hopeful read.

I interpreted it as a satire of paranormal romance rather than being Twilight-esque.

I interpreted it as a combination Romeo & Juliet retelling and commentary on human nature.

>64 norabelle414: Oh, it was definitely those, too.

#57: I totally agree with you--I prefer "yes, I liked/no, I disliked" ratings/reviews, too, though I like it when people go into detail why they dis/liked a book (whether it was the characters, writing style, ending, etc). And also agreed--required reading in school makes a book seem worse to me than it actually is.

#58: Ditto!

#61: Same here. I don't really have the time or talent to write lengthy reviews, so I just give star ratings and a quick mention of what I liked or disliked about the book. Kudos to those who do write reviews on LT!

#62: Sparkling zombies? :D Oh man. I do plan on reading it, though, I swear; but I'll probably end up watching the movie first. Glad you liked it! Is that your first romance with such a high rating?

Stephen, that is a really great review of Warm Bodies. As soon as someone labels a book as a 'paranormal romance', I run for the hills. I have a lot of troubles with that label. 'Sparkling Zombies' doesn't sound quite so bad. You have caught my interest enough for me to do something I thought I wouldn't do..... place a hold at my library to check out a copy and read it.

Rachel/Nora: I honestly didn't make the connection between Warm Bodies and Twilight until the author literally described R as 'sparkling.' I wish I would have noted down where it was exactly, but it was in there. It is definitely reminiscent of Romeo and Juliet though.

Initially I actually intentionally misinterpreted it as an allegory of sorts, the zombie being a young man with social anxiety. It's not what the author intended, but there was a particular passage that I thought described me spectacularly, so I decided that the author was displaying a shy, introverted young man coming out of his shell. Here is the passage I'm talking about:

"I try to think of things to say but nothing comes, and if something did come I probably couldn't say it. This is my great obstacle, the biggest of all the boulders littering my path. In my mind I am eloquent; I can climb intricate scaffolds of words to reach the highest cathedral ceilings and paint my thoughts. But when I open my mouth, everything collapses. So far my personal record is four rolling syllables before some...thing...jams."

Ohmygod, maybe I'm a zombie... ;)

Sara: It appears so! Thought I liked Waterloo Station too. Kind of...

Lori: Even though technically it's a romance with zombies, I don't think it is filled with the usual tropes that you would expect from a paranormal romance. Then again, I don't read paranormal romance, so maybe it is. *Shrugs*

Do the zombies actually sparkle in Warm Bodies or was Stephen just being facetious? Cause I've been seriously considering this book but there's no way I'm reading anything with sparkling zombies in it. Never.

>70 PawsforThought: The adjective "sparkling" is used approximately ONCE in the entire book, and it is not meant literally.

71. Whew!

I took the usage of the word "sparkling" as a joke. Satire. You know.....

I interpreted the allegory to be that zombies are people who have given up on any passionate pursuit and have just accepted the norm, settled into a pattern of pursuing goals that someone else has made and which aren't in line with your own thoughts, and accepted racism/judementalness/us-versus-them because it's easier to move with the masses than against them.

Well, this morning couldn't have been any more dismal. I called the library, but the director wasn't in again, so I had to wait for them to call me. An hour and a half of anxiety later he finally called, only to tell me they don't offer work for volunteers.

*Sigh* So much for that.

What?? What kind of library doesn't want free labor? That is weird.

But at least now the director knows your name and that you were interested, so he will notice it when your job application comes up!

He said he would keep my name on file 'in case anything changes,' but this is the library that tosses out job applications immediately if they aren't hiring at the time, which sounds like a terrible policy (what happens if someone's quites tomorrow and they have no job applications on file?)

He said that they do use volunteers, but it sounds like they only use people with court-ordered community service and the like. I should have told him I was addicted to cocaine or something.

You could always commit a crime and get court-ordered service. Maybe getting caught speeding multiple times or something?

(just kidding don't do that)

Speeding sounds dangerous. Can I just flash people or something?

Probably indecent exposure precludes you from volunteering at the library.

Bah, I never knew it would be so difficult to give away free labor. :(

In that case, don't EVER try to join the Peace Corps. It is an exercise in futility and frustrating as hell. Hello, I'm trying to give you 2+ years of my time and effort FOR FREE and you can't find a way to make use of me? Is there suddenly a lack of people in need?

>81 leahbird: Not to mention the 2+ years it takes just to apply. I tried doing that but I never fully got through the process. (Due to failings on multiple levels, not just the Peace Corps itself)

I'd always wanted to try Peace Corps, but it sounded like such a pain to join. Isn't there another library close to you Stephen? I thought there was another library in the other direction?

And that's great that you got through the process of talking to them, anyway! Good job! :)

I wonder if it would be possible to volunteer at a school library instead? There would probably be more of a screening process, but I assume you haven't actually been charged with indecent exposure yet.

No I believe Stephen has only been officially charged with decent exposure and indecent inexposure.

Okay, I've had a day of moping and I think I'm done. I spent most of yesterday trying to figure out what I'm going to do next. The library job was really my only glimmer of hope of being remotely happy (at least where work is concerned,) but after a year and a half of applying and then failing to even volunteer, it's obviously a pipe dream. I'll continue to apply of course, but probably with a lot less enthusiasm.

So, I don't really have much of a plan now. I guess it's back to patrolling the job sites, and submitting applications for crap jobs at local retail stores and the like It's a dismal prospect, but it's not like I have a lot of options.

In the meantime, I have to figure out what I want to read next. Despite having 100+ books on the TBR pile none of them seem very appealing right now.

*hugs*

Bad news sucks, my friend, but I'm glad you've come up with some kind of action plan. *extra hugs*

Now, I could always pick a book for you... we both know I have good taste.

Thanks Micky. *Hugs back* I don't handle rejection well, and though this isn't rejection it still ignites my self-doubting, self-deprecating habbits.

As for the book issue, the problem is I don't want to start anything huge because I want to visit the library soon, and I'm not in the mood for any of my small books. Plus I want something light/easy to read right now. I'll probably just start some paperback thriller/suspense type of thing and hope it is fast paced and not completely dreadful. The Sanctuary or The Ice Limit or something *Shrug*

I do agree that we both have good taste... :P

*HUGS!* there's a job out there for you Stephen! You may just need to work a crap job for a while in order to get there. Be strong!

I spent months several years ago desperately looking for a job. It was totally demoralizing. The problem is that there are so many people going after every single job that you cease being an actual person- you are, at best, a resume or, at worst, a resume they didn't bother looking at. After months and literally hundreds of applications I came pretty much unhinged. It was the day the lady at a hair salon told me they liked me a lot but they were giving the RECEPTIONIST job to someone who was in beauty school. Here I was with a college degree and years of admin experience and I couldn't get a job answering phones at a hair salon. I called my mom screaming crying and just over the world. I then spent the next several days eating cold spaghetti and watching Netflix on the couch pretending the world didn't exist. It helped, a little.

I'm sorry you are blue. I know how easy it is to get down about this stuff. I am a diligent (if not super happy about it) worker but the hunting for a job process makes me feel like the most undesirable person on the planet. Hugs to you!

>90 leahbird: seconded with fewer details. :)

I've spent YEARS going from being unemployed to working menial jobs to pay rent (well, sort of still am). Sometimes, that's what you have to do for the time being. Doesn't mean it's the be-all and end-all of your working life. Maybe you'll end up studying part time (or full-time, like I did) WHILE working tht menial brain-numbing job.

You're still young, Stevie-kins, your life's path isn't set in stone (and it never will be, you can always turn around).

I think the process is ultimately going to be:

1) work at random menial job (you will get one eventually); save up a few months' rent money
2) move to slightly larger city that has more libraries where you can volunteer
3) resume earlier plan: volunteer at library while working at random menial job, until you can actually work at the library

Which doesn't really help with obtaining the initial random job, but that will come with persistence. One day.

>93 _Zoe_: I second that, with the addendum that the larger city will also have more plentiful menial jobs.

>93 _Zoe_: I third that, with the comment that "larger city" doesn't mean you have to move to a major metropolis. Even moving to Columbus or Cleveland would get you through the three steps above.

Ok, I'm not quite caught up, but here are my thoughts:

-Good for you for making the phone call!
-Can I still give you my number?
-I'm sorry you got bad news from the library.
-I feel your pain at the funk you seem to be in or were in.
-*hugs* to you. Missed you while I was away in the hospital.

... Otherwise, just wanted to make sure you knew I was here and trying desperately to catch up with everything here on LT. *waves*

Thanks everyone. I relentlessly applied to just about every retail store in Logan and Lancaster repeatedly for a year or more last year, without getting a single interview. It was incredibly demoralizing. It's possible that the life funk I've been experiencing over the past few months is a result of that, but I'm not sure.

What makes job hunting so much harder for me is the fact that I'm doing it on dial-up. If I were to drive the half-hour it takes to get up to Lancaster every time I want to apply somewhere I'd spend a fortune in gas. With my internet speed, it usually takes well over an hour to submit each application, and some websites are completely unloadable. Job hunting websites are agonizingly slow, and the whole process is gets exhausting fast.

I can't imagine what would happen if I actually landed an interview. I'm shy, quiet, awkward...I just don't make a good first impression. I tend to get comfortable and start coming out of my shell eventually, and I know I seem a lot less weird and creepy than when I'm in my nervous brain-frazzled state of mind that I get into when I first meet someone, but it doesn't bode well when you have such a short time to convince someone that you are right for the job. Which is why volunteering at the library would have been PERFECT. They already know I'm quiet, and after spending a few hours there I'm sure I'd be comfortable with everyone.

Well, anyway, I guess I should get to loading up those job websites...

Oh, and on the reading front, I started Seventh Son by Orson Scott Card and it's pretty awesome so far.

Esquiress: You can certainly PM it to me if you wish, several people took Nora's advice and sent me their numbers, but phones are still scary so I probably won't be picking it up any time soon... *nervous shudder*

>97 Ape: I can't imagine what would happen if I actually landed an interview. I'm shy, quiet, awkward...I just don't make a good first impression. I tend to get comfortable and start coming out of my shell eventually
That's because you don't spend enough time talking (with your FACE, not your HANDS) to people. If you practiced talking to people more often, you would be more comfortable with it and less nervous. And phones would be less scary if you used them more often.

I'm sure the library would be happy to let you use their computers for applying for jobs. That is one of the two reasons they are there.

99. Hear, hear! I agree with everything you just wrote.

Definitely use the library computers for job applications when your own modem is so slow.

You know what I (the librarian) am going to say about using computers at the library right? Also, I might nudge you towards talking to the staff about good sites to look at for jobs. You know, if you were to ask.

*hugs*

There is still 20 minutes of driving involved to visit my library, which I've roughly calculated to $3-$5 in gas per trip, depending on gas prices and whatnot. I can certainly use their computers (or borrow my mom's laptop) whenever I go in for books, but I certainly can't visit daily, so most of my job hunting will still be on my home computer. *Shrug*

I have Oreos stuck between my toes. Just saying. That's for posting nothing on my thread. :P

But re: the library director not wanting volunteers or whatever his reasoning was, I can probably guess it was because it would mean extra work for him. Seriously. I've asked at my branch and others about volunteer work, and it basically comes down to librarians having to "babysit" the volunteers, and a lot of them just don't like to do it. (It's the same in other fields, like in medicine, where medical students have to follow nurses/docs around.) So, see? It rarely has anything to do with the person applying. And I shudder to think your library would only allow crack addicts to volunteer. Usually, they do background checks on everyone (staff, volunteers, etc).

And as for interviews, don't worry about feeling nervous. That's normal! Even interviewers feel nervous interviewing new people. It's basically like a first date. Everyone hates it, but you try and get through it. And fyi: I am one of the worst people at interviews, so don't feel alone about that.

Glad you're liking your current read (I'll have to pop over to that page and check it out)! :)

*drive-by snuggle*...
EVERYBODY READ WARM BODIES, IT'S AWESOME!

And yeah, I loved the way it tipped its hat to Romeo and Juliet. You notice R and Julie fairly quickly, but... his best friend is a zombie called M, and HER best friend wants to be a nurse. Genius. :)

>104 elliepotten: Don't forget Julie(t)'s boyfriend Perry/Paris

I totally didn't catch anything beyond the names R and Julie, but I haven't read Romeo and Juliet since I was in high school, so most of the details are fuzzy.

Sara: All that is incredibly depressing, thanks! :P I try to keep in mind that interviewers are often just as nervous as you are, but I can't possibly remember such things while I'm in such a panicked state. :P

For you, friend. Hopefully this ones opens. http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_maq3zcSexX1qz4d4bo1_400.jpg

Haha, thanks Leah. *Smooch*

107. Love that.

I GOT AN APE SMOOCH!!!!!

*Blushes*

Finally getting caught up here - best of luck with that second phone call! I'm rooting for you!

Hehe, I don't think you got caught up Amber, I made the second phone call and my library said "you suck, go away." Well, no, they worded it differently, but it's the same idea. :P

Oh crap! Sorry. Clearly I'm skimming to catch up. Man, that stinks!

They did NOT say you sucked. I read about it, and it wasn't the same thing at all.

>110 leahbird:: I GOT AN APE SMOOCH!!!!!
I can related to that excitedness :)

*pounce*

Just thought I'd change things up with all the smooching and hugging going on in here. :P

Amber: Yeah, I agree. :(

Es: Yeah huh! Well...pretty much...

Micky: OHMYGOD!!!! You really need to warn me before doing that...

Nuh-uh. I heard all about it.

Haha!!!

*pounce* as well!!!

Being pounced upon by two ladies at the same time...I think I had a dream about this once. Or was it a nightmare?

No one said that Stephen sucks. Stop exaggerating.

Okay, so maybe he didn't say that exactly...

I believe what they actually said was along the lines of "We don't want free help". Not a word about anyone being anthing near a loser.

Well obviously he didn't SAY anything about me being a loser, that would just be stating the obvious. ;)

>122 PawsforThought: I disagree. The library director is clearly a loser.

But he's the director of my favorite place in the world...he CAN'T be a loser. And the fact that my favorite place in the world is a small-town library, well, *Ahem* Yeah, I think you'll have to concede that I'm right this time. *Raises hands victoriously*

In defense of the library director, a lot of libraries are unionized and organizing volunteers in that kind of situation can be tricky so some don't bother with the headache. The other likely reason is the extra work for staff that coordinating and supervising volunteers creates. And most library staff are stretched thin as it is.

This isn't to say I don't think Stephen wouldn't be an amazing volunteer and that they're truly missing out not using you. I just see both sides of the issue.

But Stephen is most emphatically not a loser. Unless he's playing a board game with me. In which case, I am most definitely the winner. And he's the... other thing. ;)

NOT a loser.

I'm so sorry that being pounced upon by two lovely ladies seems to be a nightmare for you and not an excellent and fun dream ;)

Hi Stephen, so sorry to hear the library volunteering didn't work out. Their loss. I wish I could offer you more, but you are getting some excellent advice here.

Ok, it took me yesterday over 1 hour to catch up on your thread and then I had to rush, because I needed to get to work *grin*
Finally, I am on my well deserved break and forgot what I wanted to say last night :(

However, I am sorry to hear that it didn't work out with your local library and I do hope that you will have some more luck in the future. As everyone else said already - you are still a pup which means you still have some time :)

Loved the reviews and your food discussions on your previous thread. Although, I don't like Gordon Ramsey and I am not such a great fan of Jamie Oliver either - also I have to say that he had some very wicked ice cream recipes *drool*.

Hm, I liked the idea of a zombie run which Rachel mentioned. I had to google it and I thought it sounds like absolute fun. Well, if you can't run and keep up with Rachel you could be her buddie - if I understood it correctly your job would be to scare the zombies away, I am sure that's something you could do?

I wonder if they do something like that in the UK? Have to go and check later :) I could register my sister for the run and I COULD scare all the naughty zombies away *nod head*, yes I am sure I would be good at that, as I have got plenty of practice in scaring doctors and parents *grin*.

I made the second phone call and my library said "you suck, go away."
Your library can talk??!@#!?

If a library COULD talk, it definitely wouldn't say "You suck, go away." It would talk in a posh English accent and say "My dear fellow, one couldn't possibly entertain such an idea at this moment in time. No hard feelings old chap - join me for a cup of tea and a cucumber sandwich one of these days and we'll talk literature!"

Aaaaah, libraries. Like comforting old professors in elbow patches.

>131 elliepotten:: I love this message :)

Micky: I have the worst luck imaginable, so I'm sure you would cream me at any board game involving dice-throwing or wheel-spinning. :P

Esquiress: Being pounced upon by two ladies is definitely nightmarish. It's like being pounced upon by 1 lady, only twice as scary!

Hi Judy! I'm just glad to see you visiting my thread. :)

Bianca: I know there are Zombie Runs in numerous cities in the United States, but I'm not sure if they've...ummmm, spread to other countries. You can not like the other guys, by the way, so long as you like Anthony Bourdain. You know I have VERY...'distinguished' taste in people, so he has to be awesome, right?

Megan: Most people don't know this, but libraries are actually sentient beings. The 'librarians' you see are actually just automatons controlled by the Library so humans have a more friendly and familiar interface to interact with. ;)

Ellie: There is not nearly enough vulgarity for that to be an American library. :P

Wait. I'm an automaton?! Why did no one tell me?!

*Points at "Micky"* See? This is how they get you, parading around like they actually have individual personalities and whatnot. They are sophisticated lifeforms, it's quite magnificent really.

See how "magnificent" you think it is when I smack you up the back of your head. :P

Oh...my...GOD!!!!!! You mean you can do that? Like, with one of my local librarians? *Gasp* "They" aren't sentient beingS, they are one, giant, interconnected superorganism. Holy crap!! :o

We are Skynet. *ominous music*

.......

Of all the things that get discussed here, only now am I getting creeped out. Libraries are living organisms? *shudders*
Reminds me a little of that Stephen King short story of which I, of course, can't remember the title right now...

Oh, The Library Police? The Library Policeman? Something like that...

I don't think being pounced upon by females should be scary to one as young as you... ;)

Amber: Don't worry, they are kind and generous living organisms. It's very unlikely they have any kind diabolical plan to dominate the planet with their vast, infinite wisdeom or anything...

Es: *Ahem* For a shy, insecure virginal social phobe, it's definitely scary... :)

>141 scaifea: The Library Policeman from Four Past Midnight

Morphy: Yes! V. creepy.

Getting caught up with things here, Stephen, and very sorry to learn that your library isn't taking on volunteers. Everyone has provided you with great advice and since I don't have anything new to add to, I will just say that I think you are an intelligent individual and that you will be a great asset to any business that hires you... I just wish I could force them to hire you to prove it!

And so say all of us!

- of course libraries talk and sometimes they can be really mean, because they decide to hide books which I really, really want :(

Yes, it has spread to the UK AND Malaysia AND........ the next one in the UK will be in Lincoln. Hmpf, I send my sister the link AND all I got was NICE! I really would have thought there would be a much more enthusiastic response, especially as I offered to be her buddy :(

12. Seventh Son by Orson Scott Card



Pages: 242
Rating: 3/5

Fiction: Fantasy/Alternate History
Owned

Set during the early settlement of what would become the United States, Seventh Son uses many early superstitions held by the people of the time and realizes them in a fantasy novel that I found both intriguing and rather dull. There isn’t much plot to speak of, and though that is usually something I covet I just didn’t seem to fall in love with the world the author was trying to build. I think it’s simply a matter of preference than poor writing so I’m giving the book an average rating, but I won’t be continuing with the series…most likely…

Hm, have got that one and a couple of others on mount TBR somewhere, so no rush necessary there.

Es: *Ahem* For a shy, insecure virginal social phobe, it's definitely scary... :)

I'm sure some of that can be rectified quite readily... ;)

> 151 Yep, sure are you completely right Es ;)

Some of OSC's books are fantastic and others are not-so-great. My impression of Seventh Son is it was one of the latter.

Bianca: Yeah, I wouldn't rush it personally. Having an incomplete series in my library is going to drive me crazy though... Thankfully my library has every single book in the series EXCEPT ONE, as usual, so there is no temptation to continue with it.

Esquiress/Bianca: *Blushes* Oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear. *Puts extra pants on*

Rachel: Well, it seems well-liked by most people, it has a pretty high average rating considering how many people have it listed in their library. It felt like one of those typical 'first entry in a long series' books where the spent more time world-building than plot-flinging, it was also firmly rooted in a religion vs. superstition discussion which I didn't find terribly appealing, and I tend not to find early American history very interesting anyway. I like nonfiction about early American life, but reading the caricaturized dialogue that is often used in fiction tends to annoy me.

Huh. I think I'll pass on that last read, then.

And the most annoying part about the series is that almost 10 years later the last book in the series still hasn't been written and may never be written.

>149 Ape: I read that a couple years ago, and found it intriguing. I plan to continue with the series eventually so I'll let you know how it goes.

Warm Bodies is on my self to read hope to get to it this year.

First: I've heard from hard-core Orson Scott Card fans that Seventh Son isn't all that wonderful, and I trust your judgement too.

Second: I don't think extra pants will help you, sweet pea ;)

Amber: I don't blame you. :)

Morphy: Oh god, that would definitely give me some kind of aneurysm. Not cool...

Nora: Thanks! Did you post a review for Seventh Son itself? I should track it down.

BBGirl: *High fives*

Esquiress: Extra pants makes everything...safer...

In other news, I'm reading Jane Eyre, and the first 2 chapters are heartbreaking. I hate this kind of story, I really do. I'm hoping the 'romance' tag means her situation is going to get better.

Speaking of which, *Waits for Micky to start gloating*

>160 Ape: Yes, but it's not a particularly helpful review . . . . http://www.librarything.com/work/15642/reviews/18209319

I just wanted to know what you thought about it. :)

I agree with the point you made about water being used to create, and I would definitely think of fire as a destructive force, although it is used to create as well, such as in cooking and blacksmithing.

I would argue that the elements can be used for whatever purpose the wielder chooses, just like Alvin was taught to do good over evil when he abused the cockroaches, or the way religion was portrayed as good/evil depending on the circumstance.

161. You're reading Jane Eyre? I feel sorry for you. I wouldn't re-read that for all the bookshop gift cards in the world.

I am, and I love the writing, but I'm a sucker for the language of the time, so long as it isn't overly purple. I don't really know why I chose to read a romance novel though. *Glares at Micky*

Oh, Stephen, I *loved* Jane Eyre! Just the right amount of creepy to make the 'romance' okay. I think you'll like it. At least I hope you do.

Haha, creepy is familiar, at least. :P If I'm sympathetic towards the character then I will totally encourage the romance. So far, I'm very sympathetic with the character. Poor girl! I would say she deserves a nice man...except she's only 10 years old right now. :P

I never found Jane Eyre creepy - not in the slightest. Just boring. Particularly Jane, although the cousins or whatever they were fairly early in the book were even worse.

I was rooting for *SPOILER* the woman in the attic to burn everything down.

Jane Eyre is awesome! Are you going to read Jane Slayre next??? Mrs. Reed is a vampire!

Jane is boring well atleast to me. This book is like marmite you love it or hate it. I much perfur all the charcters from jane eyre in The Eyre Arrire by Jasper Fforde.

#165 by @Ape> Oh Stephen, this is one of my favorites. You know why? Because the love story is about plain (even to a certain degree unattractive) people with agile minds and a disregard for convention. OH I LOVE IT! Can't wait to hear what you think when you're done.

*floats down on a cloud made of gloating*

I am so happy right now, Stephen. You have no idea! Classic romantic novels are the perfect fit for you. Also, I am super fond of Jane Eyre so I hope you continue to like it. :)

I liked Jane Eyre well enough. It was a little too gothic for my tastes...I was expecting something more like Austen's novels - satire. But I love watching movie remakes of books from that era. And Jane Eyre is one that I'm always happy to see a new version of.

I liked Jane Eyre when I read it as a young'un. I still have a beautiful copy of it. My friend and I went to see the movie together, and we both cried like babies; she was worse, though, because she was pregnant at the time :)

Getting back to those extra pants... Yeah, not gonna help :) Safer, my hind foot!

Hi Stephano!! I hope you enjoy Jane. I think I have read it two or three times. Nice job Mickie! Now about those extra pants...LOL!

Paws: I've had this discussion before, boring books tend to be my favorite! I tend to be cold toward mysteries/thrillers, and other genre heavy on plot and light on...substance. So I'm very okay with what other people typically think of as 'boring.' :)

Nora: It doesn't seem my library has a copy! Curses!!

BBGirl: Hurray for boring!

Leah: That sounds exactly like something I would like, of course. I can't deal with the whole 'pretty damsel in distress and the hunky warrior with the big...uhhhh, broadsword' stuff. *Shudders*

Micky: Classic romances do sound perfect for me.

Rachel: I nearly checked out Pride and Prejudice, which I've never read, but convinced myself to put it back in favor of Jane Eyre, probably because Pride and Prejudice had a person on the cover. :P (Take that, Micky!!!)

Es: There is no way I could have appreciated something like this when I was younger, so I'm always in awe when I hear about women who read these books and enjoyed them so early in life. :)

Kim: ...how many extra pants should I wear, do you think? Surely 6 or 7 layers would be like an impenetrable fortress for my unmentionables...

If you end up enjoying Jane Eyre, you should try Pride and Prejudice. It's got enough comedy and smart people to be great. Sense and Sensibility might possibly be even better, in my opinion (although it's a bit grimmer).

176. Let me know if you ever need a list of "the most boring books I've ever read". I'll be more than happy to help out.

Also, P&P is GREAT and you should definitely read it after you've finished JE. Very funny book.

Leah: Oh, I love grim. I mean, one of my favorite books of all time is The Road, so yeah... :)

Paws: A list of boring books? *Swoons* :P

Ok, I'm going to go against the grain and say that while I LOVE Pride and Prejudice, I don't think it should be your first exposure to Jane Austen. Mostly because most of the straight guys I know are not big fans of Darcy. I think Northanger Abbey might actually be a better introduction for you, Stephen.

I'd vote for Emma.

>180 MickyFine: I second the first part of that. He might like Emma, in which the heroine ends up with the nice guy who has been there all along, but it is rather girly-er than the others so maybe not.

ETA: Richard beat me to it!

I'm totally offended at being compared to most straight guys. How degrading!

But Urp...I mean Ape!...you *are* like most straight guys. You drink fizzy death-juice, you're too shy to talk to girls, you worry incessantly about your attractiveness, I mean really! You couldn't possibly be a better exemplar of the paradigm!

I am so ashamed.

Further proof you're the bog-standard straight male! You're ashamed of being male! Women don't like men who like being men, unless they like to screw other men. See? You're utterly normal.

Well, Stevie, Emma IS the most boring Austen book I've read (only one I didn't like so far) so it might be perfect for you.
I agree with Nora that it's a girly book. Way too girly for me.

I don't think it's girly; I think it is more girly than Jane Austen's other books.

188. That's what I meant to write. Just forgot to finish my train of thought.

Stephen is reading a Jane Austen book? Ok, the world IS coming to an end; no doubt about it. :P

I, too, think P&P might not be a great exposure - as Micky said, Darcy would probably be WAY too much for you...especially if you suffer from insecurities when you read romances.

Northanger Abbey is nice as long as you're aware that it's a parody of gothic romance and is not meant to be taken seriously. It's my least favorite. Emma might be good for the reason Nora pointed out, though I agree it's a bit girly.

Sense and Sensibility is my personal favorite, and I think you'd be able to relate to the main male characters in that one without suffering too many insecurities. ;)

Yeah, for Jane Eyre a book I quite enjoyed as well. I have to second Nora and Rachel in regards to Emma that could indeed be a book you would enjoy also it is indeed a bit girly.

I also enjoyed Sense and Sensibility and that would also be on my list of recommendations.

Richard: In my experience straight men rarely feel any shame at all, unless it is something detrimental to their heterosexuality...

Paws: Okay, Emma it is!

Sara: I'm not reading a Jane Austen book (yet) but you may have a point, the only reason I'm reading these books is to become a harbinger of apocalyptic awesomeness. That must be it.

Rachel: Ohhhh, I see, so Darcy is one of those icky "lady's man" types? Ew. Okay, yeah, I'm NEVER reading Pride and Prejudice for any reason...unless my opinion of myself changes, which I think is reasonable to believe will not be happening soon.

Bianca: I'll have to check my library's website, because I didn't see a copy of Sense and Sensibility when I was browsing yesterday. Although they did have the Seamonster version. Seamonsters and romance...yeah, there's a RELEASE THE KRAKEN joke here, for sure.

I am with Micky, Northanger Abbey is probly the best place to start. I love Pride and Prejudice but for you will be to much with all the romance. I suggest you build up to p&p but start with northanger abbey.

193 - OK how would you use that joke? I mean you wouldn't just say "Shall I release the Kraken" ??? :) and please don't forget I am extremely SLOW at understanding jokes, so PLEASE explain very clearly :)

Thought you'd be interested in NPR's interview with Amy Stewart about The Drunken Botanist.

BBGirl: Oh no, I'm not reading P&P ever! Eeek!

Bianca: It's just an absurd thing to say. I would definitely laugh if someone said RELEASE THE KRAKEN right before removing their pants. :P

Leah: The site doesn't seem to want to load for me. :(

why did you come that concusion about p&p. would help if i say that i don't find Darcy swoony.

>193 Ape: Darcy is not a ladies' man. He is not so great with the ladies due to an excess of pride, which is like the opposite of you.

Also, he doesn't particularly like social situations or conversing with people he doesn't know.

Yeah, most guys I know who have read P&P are not fans of Darcy simply because they think he's a bit of a jerk. Which is why I think Northanger Abbey is better for you. It's funny, Catherine is generally likable, and Henry Tilney (the hero) is just a decent guy.

harbinger of apocalyptic awesomeness

I like that phrase, especially to describe you!

Stopping by and waving hi.

Darcy is not a ladies man - quite the opposite, he keeps to himself and his close friends. He's quite uppity and a bit snobbish but he is also caring and romantic (later on).

BBGirl: It's all Micky and Rachel's fault. :P

Nora/Leah/Micky/Paws: Ohhhhhhh, so it sounds like his insecurities (expressed outwardly as snobbish pride) make him unappealing ot the ladies? Yeah, I feel more insecure just thinking about it.

Esquiress: I'm flattered that my ruinous behavior has been met with approval in someone.

HI LINDA! :)

205. I think his wealth makes his VERY appealing to the ladies before they realise how snobbish he is. And I don't think he's the slightest bit insecure. Quite the opposite.

I've only read one Jane Austen (Persuasion) and I didn't think I'd like it, but it turns out that I really did. I'm not saying that you *would* like it, but it certainly wasn't a typical romance, I think (much more sensible, or something). Although I don't think I've ever read a full-on romance novel, so then what do I know, eh? I'll just be quiet now...

Paws: But everyone snobby and arrogant is insecure, that's the rule! :P

Amber: My library has Persuasion. It has a person on the cover. In fact, EVERY Jane Austen book has a person on the cover. I think that might be a rule too...

I think you need a set of cloth book covers, so you can immediately cover up whatever is on the front of the library books you borrow...

But they'll be in my library profile forever. Just look at that Never Let Me Go cover, there's no hiding it... :P

Just pick one of the generic covers instead.

ETA: Or draw your own cover and upload it!

I didn't like Emma. The main character drove me up the wall. I much preferred Pride and Prejudice. I haven't read other Austen's.

#205 by @Ape> sounds like his insecurities (expressed outwardly as snobbish pride) make him unappealing ot the ladies? Yeah, I feel more insecure just thinking about it.

Without ruining the ENTIRE plot of the novel, I would just say that he's not unappealing to MOST of the ladies but his issues and those of the heroine drive the story very nicely. That's what I think you would respond to. It's kind of a comedy of errors and misunderstandings about who people really are and what they show to the world.

Yeah, I totally didn't mean to imply that Darcy was a ladies' man. Just that most P&P lovers just ADORE Darcy as the most romantic character in the world because he's handsome, rich, and willing to admit his mistakes once he realizes that he's made them. Though if I met him in real life, I don't think I would have much to do with him. :) Too higher-than-thou for my tastes. But it makes a good story!

Amber: What!? *Twitch* I couldn't POSSIBLY do that. *Twitch* It has to be the very exact cover, with all the blurbs in the right place and everything! *Twitch twitch* :P

Morphy: Ahhhh, so many differing opinions!

Leah: Hmmmmm, I'm still undecided.

Rachel: I thought handsome, rich, and arrogant were what defined a ladies' man...???

Yes, but if you uploaded a photo of the book cover cover, then it *would* be the vey exact cover, as it looked as you were reading it...

215. No, a ladies man is someone who sets out to charm women (and often succeed in it). Darcy does no such thing. The opposite, in fact.

Amber: Noooooooo! *Twitch*

Paws: Money, charm...I fail to see the difference. :P

Well, hurry up and read some Jane Austen, Stephen. I'm eager for the world to end.

Wouldn't it be faster to just bio-engineer an antibiotic-resistant super plague?

No.

Also, Stephen reading Jane Austen won't cause the world to end. I promise.

Why do you have to be so pessimistic, Micky? Geez... :P

It's just my nature. It's how I roll. :P

Well, burst my bubble then, Micky. :( What else can cause the world to end?

I would assume neither you nor Stephen indulging in any form of innuendo for a week is probably not a good thing for everyone's longevity. ;)

Ack. Not possible. I think that would make my brain implode or something. Not good for me. Next. :P

Bursting my bubble like that is incredibly dangerous, I'm liable to explode all over the place.

Just stopping by...glad to see everything is going/carrying on, as usual....

Please, don't explode, Stephen...terribly messy, that

;-}

Gross. I'm not cleaning up exploded Stephen. That's just not happening. :P

I've become pretty good over the years at containing the blast.

*smooch*

Aaah, so you are good at containing the blast. That means that you probably use Allomancy to form a protective bubble around yourself?

Hi there, Jude. *Smooches*

Bianca: Actually, it's mostly just practiced aim and absorbent tissues.

This conversation is getting increasingly gross. And weird.

You started it. ;)

And be sure that if I started it, it was totally innocent initially.

Well, yes, situations liks this are usually innocent...initially...

LOL 233-237 :) Just stopping by to wish you a Zombie free and relaxing weekend!

I very much await your thoughts on Jane Eyre

I'm currently on chapter 18, and I sit here wondering if it's weird that I hope Blanche Ingram takes a tumble down the stairs only to be trampled by a horse at the bottom.

>232 drachenbraut23:: Caught the Allomancy reference! Love Sanderson.

>239 Ape: Not weird at all. :)

#239 by @Ape> I was hoping for flesh-eating bacteria...

Oh yes, that would definitely work for me. :)

Hope you're having a good weekend! :)

Thanks Micky. Other than ruining a bowl by accidentally melting it on the stove top, ruining a stovetop eye by accidentally melting a bowl on it, and ruining and oven mit by accidentally setting in on fire while quickly trying to clean melted plastic off a stovetop eye, it's been fantastic so far!

I'm sorry, Stephen, but your explanation made me chuckle...

You know what is REALLY sad? I was making Ramen.

Aww, man, I missed all the sexual innuendos yet again. At least Micky got to enjoy them. ;) And yay! Stephen's turning into a pyro kitchen guru like me. Congratulations! Better just learn how to eat Ramen raw. :P

Ramen in a plastic bowl. *shiver* Oh those are some memories I'd Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind away.

Mmmm, Ramen...yum!

Sara: One of these days the 3 of us are all going to enjoy sexual innuendos together.

Richard: Ha! Yeah. If it makes you feel better I fancied it up with a creamy sauce and meatballs. Uhhhh...frozen, precooked meatballs heated in the microwave, that is... -.- It's scary, the number of ingredients they can pack into a meatball. *Shudders*

Amber: I tend to like Ramen for about half a bowl, and then the bottom-muck start looking nauseatingly enidible. It's cheap though, and cheap is good for me right now (still).

>245 Ape: Martha Stewart you aren't, my friend. Although you could probably do without the incarceration for insider training anyway. :) Hope today is better at the very least.

I don't know, I think I'm imroving. I mean, I didn't set the kitchen on fire, and there weren't any major mishaps while doing the cooking itself, it was after. 8-)

I wouldn't say you're improving until there are no fires in your kitchen at all. :P

Maybe you're right...

New thread is up!