Bird by Bird: Some Instructions on Writing and Life

I've read many books about writing. I honestly cannot remember how or why this audiobook wound up on my list, but I'm so glad it did. While much of Lamott's advice is geared toward writers of fiction, the book is invaluable for anyone who writes (or frankly, reads). And if you want to get caught up in the eccentricities of broccoli as metaphor, that's fine, but...please, allow yourself to enjoy the comedy. Some of it is fairly irreverent and may not land 100% in 2025 social mores, but most of it is a lot less offensive than a lot of what comes flying out of the mouths of stand-up comedians. If you've understood life's absurdity through grieving someone close, you'll get it. Lamott's reading is perfect--think Lily Tomlin's character show more "Frankie" without the woo-woo stuff. And in between the quips and the sometimes a-bit-too-long tongue-in-cheek tirades, lo and behold--there are some sound lessons about "...being militantly on your own side," and how you don't want to "look at your feet to see if you're doing it right--just dance!". Lamott learned through trial and much error perhaps the biggest lesson of all: "being enough was going to have to be an inside job." Mic drop.

Proponents of mindfulness will value Lamott's observations such as: "You get your intuition back when you make space for it and stop the chatter of the rational mind." That seems key to a lot of art and creativity, not just writing. Truly, one of my favorite read-by-the-author audiobooks (sharing company with Anthony Bourdain reading Kitchen Confidential and Stanley Tucci's reading of Taste), and Lamott keeps you laughing while you nod your head in affirmation of the book's wisdom. If you find yourself in a slump (of any kind), give it a listen. Lamott's tell-it-like-it-is isn't doom-and-gloom, but instead very life-affirming. I've got a post-it note on my monitor now that reminds me: "bird by bird!" show less

Anne Lamott is delightful, resonating with with honesty, insight and humor. She is capital "W," Writer. It is her life's work and vocation. Her relationship with writing is complicated and messy, yet devoted - like a on again, off again love affair.

For me, someone who aspires to be a small "w" writer, it was both inspiring. Her main argument is this: that the process of writing itself makes the process worth it - it is a beautiful mix of introspection, pain, repulsion, and hopefully discovery and redemption, in its truest sense.

Few books have I laughed out loud at so much. Did I mention she's a delight? Highly recommended for Writers or aspiring writers and anyone else wanting to learn something about life.

In Bird by Bird, her 1994 writing guide, Anne Lamott approaches the craft with a near perfect blend of seriousness and humor, never speaking down to her readers, while at the same time reminding them that a healthy sense of humor about themselves is one of the most useful tools in a writer's kit. Lamott may not be able to turn you into the writer you want to be, but she will motivate you to keep plugging away until something happens – even if that “something” turns out to be a lifetime of writing for your own expressive pleasure.

Lamott characterizes herself as a shy, strange-looking child who learned to use humor to deflect the taunts about her looks that boys made as they rode by on their bicycles. As she puts it, "So first I got show more funny and then I started to write...” And it paid off, because in high school the desire of her classmates to see themselves reflected in her stories gained her the kind of popularity she otherwise would never have enjoyed. Anne Lamott's defines her life and who she is by her writing, and she knows that there are countless others out there who feel the same way. Bird by Bird is her gift to those others.

Bird by Bird is divided into five parts, each section geared to take the want-to-be writer another step or two toward that goal. Part One, "Writing," focuses on structure and on techniques designed to keep you coming back to the keyboard. She begins with the "short assignment" concept by which a writer focuses on one tiny part of the story he wants to tell rather than allowing the bigger picture to overwhelm him. From there, Lamott covers everything from plots, to the dangers of perfectionism (which she calls "the oppressor, the enemy of the people"), to the merits of using flawed and failing characters, to plot, and finally, to a section about recognizing "when you're done."

Parts Two and Three focus more on keeping yourself in "the writing frame of mind" and knowing where to look for "help along the way." Lamott describes the writer as someone who stands alone but decides to take a few notes in the meantime. She points out that a writer is always writing, that no matter what is happening around him, his job is to "see people as they really are," including himself. Lamott promises that simply giving yourself "permission" to begin writing will start you thinking like a writer, someone who sees material everywhere he turns.

The fourth part of the book addresses writer's voice, reasons to continue writing (to expose the unexposed), publication (if you are one of the very lucky ones), and the new fears that come with finally being published (such as the terror that you now have to prove that you can do it all again). Lamott calls the last part of Bird by Bird "The Last Class," and here she repeats much of what she tells her writing students in the classroom. Not all of them will become published writers, she tells them, but they should not let that stop them because being a writer will change their lives. Writing will "nourish the spirit," is "Intellectually quickening," and has "the potential to be as rich and enlivening as the priesthood." Above all else, she says, "Writing and reading decrease our sense of isolation. They deepen and widen and expand our sense of life: they feed the soul."

If you want to be part of the "noble tradition" of writing, published or not, Bird by Bird may just be the book to get you there. show less

This is more or less a distilled version of one of Lamott's writing courses. In it she explains the importance of shitty first drafts, short assignments, and writing partners, among other things. She shares many intimate moments from her life, both writing and otherwise, as well as her responses to the usual questions from her students. This book came recommended as one of those books that every aspiring writer must read. In a way I agree with this: Lamott is brutally honest about the trials and tribulations of writing without sounding bleak or condescending (like some other people I have read). On the contrary, she's very funny. Her descriptions of her anguish as she waits for a response from her agent and her suspicion that all her show more friends are having a party behind her back are great, mostly because I - like most writers - have definitely been there. She puts a humorous spin on the artistic angst that comes with the territory. You may feel like every other writer on the planet sits down at their computer with a sunny disposition and a thousand ideas that pour out like liquid gold onto the page, but that's simply not true. Lamott's entertaining wit helped remind me that all this nonsense really is normal, and the only remedy is to get back to writing.

However, this book did not fill me with the heaping piles of inspiration that other writing books have in the past. Some part of me is now filled with the newfound fear that I am neither brave enough nor honest enough to churn out truly excellent fiction. But in the end, perhaps that's not really the point. After all, if you're not writing because you want to write - if you just want to be published and receive all the attention and reassurance that you believe it brings (which it really doesn't) - then maybe you should be rethinking this whole writing thing. To the artist, the creation of the art, however anxiety-ridden or frustrating or exhausting the process may be at times, is its own reward. Sure, it may never be published and nobody but your family may ever read it, but you still can change lives. Maybe even your own. show less

Bird by Bird combines writing instruction with memoir and personal musings to give readers a friend in Anne Lamott. She's humble, real, and funny, and her book feels comforting. Those looking for a straight-up guide to writing a strong story and getting published, though, will want another book. Lamott spends a lot of time discussing her son, her friends, her childhood, and her feelings of inadequacy as a writer. She has a pleasant conversational writing style, but her tendency to ramble keeps her book from being addictive.

The writing advice Lamott does offer, however, is exceptional. Despite having earned success many times over as an author, she never lost touch with what it feels like for the struggling writer—or for the person show more who merely dreams of being a writer. Her advice is down-to-earth and actionable.

Some aspiring writers thrive with hard-and-fast writing rules: set a schedule; write X number of words each day; create an outline with story arc—all the practical things. But Lamott doesn't subscribe to these, and her alternative "rules" make sense. Rigidity probably won't help most beginning writers, who can feel overwhelmed just trying to start. Lamott is all about getting some words, any words, on paper. She talks about "shitty first drafts" (because all writers have them); "short assignments" (a piece of advice that lessens the intimidation of getting started); and starting by writing about one's life, viewing it as if recording it only for one's offspring (or—my addition—other relatives). The beginnings of a novel can spring from these things. What's important to start is writing some words on paper without worrying about being impressive.

Lamott does discuss the more practical aspects—writing regularly, finding an agent, avoiding libel—but what makes this book different from traditional writing guides is that these were not her sole focus. She wants aspiring writers to feel seen, and she speaks to them in a feeling way:

If something inside you is real, we will probably find it interesting, and it will probably be universal. So you must risk placing real emotion at the center of your work. Write straight into the emotional center of things. Write toward vulnerability. Don't worry about appearing sentimental. Worry about being unavailable; worry about being absent or fraudulent. Risk being unliked. Tell the truth as you understand it. If you're a writer, you have a moral obligation to do this.

Readers will finish this book feeling they truly can write something publishable. Lamott's empathy and realness imbues Bird by Bird with warmth. This is a feel-good, empowering how-to by someone who cares. show less

Writing is lonely. So whenever I start a new project, I look for a book about it I haven’t read yet. It’s like having a sympathetic friend holding my hand, reassuring me.
Somehow, the book I choose is precisely what I need. Well, that’s not always true, but when it’s not, I quickly spot it and move on to another. But this one filled the bill. It came out thirty years ago, but I only recently became aware of it, although I remember hearing her spots on NPR way back when.
Lamott’s advice in this book is sensible, even if little of it is new. It’s not a problem; I need to hear it all again with each new project. And I’ve never read it in such a humorous, self-deprecating manner. She and her friends sound like a lovable, walking show more collective of personality disorders (I think those are really her words, but right now, I can’t find the quote). Somehow, they keep each other’s spirits up.
She is honest about the rivalry and jealousy writers experience. She also makes it clear (repeatedly) that publication is not the main reason to write, much less the gateway to fixing everything wrong in your life. If, toward the end, her reporting of her neuroses wears thin through repetition, along the way, there are descriptions of it that had me laughing out loud.
This book helped me get through the first five days of a new project, allowing me to make a solid start. Thank you, Anne, for being there. show less

A wonderful and wise book ostensibly meant to be a creative writing guide but grows into a sort of primer for life, or for a writing life anyway. Warm and funny, it's filled with examples of interactions with Lamott's creative writing class students, and things she's picked up from writers she admires. Her teaching includes lots of practical advice, but she makes it clear there's no secret formula. You have to have talent and you have to do the work.

There's also a strong undercurrent of spirituality in the book that provides strength and backbone without being confining or preachy. This is a book you'll return to often for inspiration when writing, sure, but also in navigating the world.