Kelly McGonigal

I am doing something I shouldn't right now but lacked the self-control to just "turn the page." I am reviewing a book I didn't read. I am basing what I am saying on the blurbs and the reviews of others. And on the author's wikipedia page. I didn't even listen to her TED talk. (and YES, she has one!) She's probably a nice person (she has an identical twin who is a game designer!) but I am unable to just ignore the amount of hype surrounding this book! To start with, a "health psychologist" is show more not the same thing as a psychologist. Next, the analogy of willpower to a muscle is such an old cliché that she should be embarrassed as a writer to use it. [book:It's On You|242549360] is another book I didn't read but even the blurb deserves 5 stars. Why am I mentioning it here? Because it explores a trend that the book under review book is following: ignoring the cultural context of a problem and, under the guise of empowering the individual, leaves it to each of us to solve for ourselves. (OK. it didn't ignore it--I learned from someone's comments on a DIFFERENT review of this book that she points out that we tend to recycle exactly when our neighbors do so.)

We live in a culture that is powered by unthinking consumption--that is, on the opposite of willpower. And then we're shocked (SHOCKED, I tell you!) to find an "epidemic" of obesity.
Statistically (we're pretending to be scientists here) what percentage of this book's readers were attracted to it because they are trying to diet? I don't know but my guess--or perhaps my instinct tells me it's high. Are they aware of the scientific research that diets don't work? And, yes, I want to complain about the word "instinct" in the title. I DID read the very long title.

I'm calming down a bit now--but pretending we're going to fix impulsivity with a book is just plain stupid. I will hide this "review" because of the "spoilers."

Wait--I have more to say. The very concept of willpower offends me. It sets up a conflict where we need compassion. I'm told the author is also interested in compassion. Don't hate your impulsive parts--they need love too. There are reasons we have parts that feel deprived. Overpowering them is the wrong way to go. show less

"I'm so stressed, and I'm doing great," said like no one ever. Well, make that one person possibly: Kelly McGonigal.

Having stress means that something matters to you. Something has meaning to you. We do spend a lot of time dreaming of a life with no cares. That's a nice mindset to visit once in a while. But long term give me a place where my decisions and life mean something.

I do like the challenge mindset for stress. Each morning I wake up with a mental to do list in my head. If I just do show more these things, I'll be OK. If I do a few more things (stretch goal) then I'm ahead of the game.

It was at times challenging to read this book which I would give it 4 stars. Maybe there were more details of studies and less descriptions of stories.

Otherwise, those two little ideas I wrote about above are worth five years. show less

I received this book as part of the LibraryThing Early Reviewers program.

This is a self help book. Normally, I am skeptical of such things; those that I've read tended to be repetitive and lacking evidence to back up their positions. So I approached this with skepticism. In fact, I approached with outright hostility, as I've been feeling very, very stressed lately. When I showed the book to someone who is also stressed out, her reaction pretty much stated my position as well. "F*** you, show more Kelly McGonicgal."

SO that's where I came from when approaching this book. That said, I believe in fair play and open-mindedness. So if Dr. McGonigal really had the ability to change my outlook on stress, I needed to shove that attitude and read the book.

Which I did. And I'm glad that I did.

The premise of the book is that stress is not bad for you. Yes, it sucks to be unhappy and yes, stress can have a bad effect on your health and happiness. But if you reframe the way you think about such things, those effects will be reduced and more manageable. So if you can't get rid of your stress, make it it work for you.

And this is practical advice because, at least in my case, the things that stress me out aren't things that I can cut out of my life. I can't walk away from them or minimize my exposure to them.

The book is chock full of studies and anecdotal stories about how the belief that stress is bad is the problem, not stress itself. That stress can be harnessed, can help you grow as a person and how it doesn't have to consume you. I like evidence, I like studies,and she quotes at least one study or research project or personal anecdote for every aspect of her book. I respect that.

The writing is also nicely accessible. For all her quoting research, it doesn't come across as too scholarly or highbrow. Just well informed.

I wouldn't say that all my troubles have melted away since reading the book. Nor that I am totally zen in the face of life's tribulations and annoyances. But I would say that I'm better equipped to deal with them. I have a new set of perspectives to frame my current experience from and maybe even a better attitude about them too.

So, thanks. I needed that. show less

The Upside of Stress: Why Stress is Good for You, and How to Get Good at It

by Kelly McGonigal, PH.D.

Coming from Kelly McGonigal, I should not have been surprised by her encouraging and practical explanations and strategies. Her message is simple but is often difficult to accept, that stress, or rather one’s perception of stress, can be beneficial. In fact, we can thrive while under stress, because the body produces reactions and substances to protect, to foster courage, to perform, to show more problem solve, to challenge. Kelly supports her assertions, and her own change of mind toward stress, with research and stories. She doesn’t just make a point, then leave you to find your own path. Instead, she lays out clear steps, such as acknowledging that stress occurs because we care deeply about something, and using the energy toward reaching goals and values. Stress can empower one with strength, greater success, courage, compassion, and behaviors of seeking a network of support. Embracing stress, even through some of life’s toughest circumstances, changes thoughts about oneself and what can be handled. Making the choice to change one’s mindset about stress can actually change bodily responses and chemistry, thus can be transformational, leading to a healthier, happier life.

The implications of research she presented are vast and I found her style and content highly motivational. This should be required reading in many circles and professions, including education. It is certain to be one of the most life changing self-help books.

This book was a LibraryThing Early Reviewer ARC from Avery, a member of Penguin Group, in exchange for my honest review. show less