Richardderus 2013 thread 21

Cocktails!

I have a category called Orphans, which will still catch all the other reading I do in 2013. Thinking 60 reviews as my target.

My 2013 ORPHANED books ticker:




I want to treat the Short Story collection challenge as a ticker-to-itself thread, thinking 48 reviews as my goal. I'll keep the thread over in the Short Stories forum.

My 2013 SHORT STORY collections ticker:




I'm going to keep a mystery-genre thread over in Crime, Thriller, and Mystery forum, with a goal of 50 reviews. Way way way too many of my reviews this year, in all forums, were mysteries and thrillers, and while I love them, I don't want to get too rut-ified and read only those books while keeping up my self-made review writing census.

My MYSTERY & THRILLER books ticker:




THIS THREAD is the 75 challenge for 2013, which will be non-fiction and non-genre-fiction books published in 2012 and 2013, plus recommendations from other 75ers.

My last thread of 2012.

My 2013 NEW books ticker:




Book 1...thread one.
Books 2 & 3...thread two.
Book 4...thread three.
Book 5...thread five.
Books 6 & 7...thread seven.
Books 8-11...thread eight.
Books 12-19...thread nine.
Books 20 & 21...thread 10.
Books 22-25...thread 11.
Books 26 & 27...thread 12.
Book 28...thread 13.
Books 29-31...thread 14.
Book 32...thread 15.
Books 33 & 34...thread 16.
Books 35-38...thread 17.
Books 39-42...thread 18.
Books 43-45...thread 19.
Books 46 & 47...thread 20.

Books are reviewed in post:

48. Meaty: Essays...#75.

And a cuttlefish AND a white rat?

Dang. Hoping for first post. Hope you have a nice peaceful night, dear Richard.

love the mouse but the eyes on the peeps are totally weird and nervous-making.

happy new thread. i'm surprised you have the wherewithal. congraters. i guess maybe dropping some of Mamie's Dewars on those nasty rock attack ouchies did at least part of a trick.

Great picture up top, my friend! *smooch*

>3 tiffin: Tui wins the plate of jewel-drop cookies!

>4 MerryMary: Better luck next thread, M'Lou. *smooch*

>5 mirrordrum: Dewar's rocks will cure ANYthing. I'm just not settling into sleep mode. The kids are pretty hurty in that deep-throb way. I hate this.

>6 tloeffler: Isn't it, TLo? I *felt* it as soon as I saw it.

I feel like that octopus right about now.

I'm not in sleep mode, either. The best I seem to be able to manage is a series of longish naps. No pain related cause, just that at my current age, I appear to be unable to sleep the night through, to my dismay. This has been a growing problem for a decade, and has reached critical mass within the last year. Ho hum. Thankfully, there are books...

>9 Chatterbox: Yep. It's 3:30 am and I'm pretty wide awake. On busy work days I usually sleep through the night, thankfully, but it's becoming more common tat I wake up in the middle of the night when I'm off. Yesterday I had the excuse of thunder at 4:30 am; not today, though.

Happy New Thread, Richard.

I'm in sleep mode on the wrong moments. I'd prefer to have it at night :-)

#7 I thought you were handing out cauliflowers until I looked a little more carefully. Congratulations dear fellow on your dash to thread 21.

Good morning to you! will there be festivities there today? I'm lying low.....

Morning RD! Congrats on #21! Is it to early for a Bloody?

*smooch* for a Happy New Thread Richard. Hope things are going as well as possible for you and Stella.

>9 Chatterbox: You feel like you're a holy cephalopod having, ummm, intimate congress with a snake? That merits a fuller explanation.

>10 kidzdoc: That sounds VERY unpleasant, Darryl. I mind not-sleeping less than I mind the chopped-up sleeps.

>11 wilkiec: Thank you, Diana! Daysleeping is hard on me because I never feel really rested. Naps are fine, but actual sleep in daylight is tough on the body of a diurnal critter.

>12 PaulCranswick: Heh, I suspect there'd be rather fewer takers for some nummy batter-fried cauliflower than there are for jewel-drop cookies. I for one would almost prefer the fried cauliflower. With some delicious ranch dressing.

>13 mckait: Festvities? Beats me. It's very sticky and there's a good chance of thunderstorms, so if it's outdoors I'd say not. What the motley crew have in mind I do not know. I was treated to in-room coffee delivery this morning, so I'm making the most of it!

>14 msf59: ...too early for...*bwaaahaaaahaaaaaaa* too early oh oh dear me

Whose house do you imagine this to be, sir? too early *gales of laughter*

>15 calm: Thanks, calm! Stella's snoring about a foot away from me, having worn herself out shouting at the dogs whose owners have the effrontery to be walking by Our Home.

Good morning. I am working today on alternating between "chores" and reading. Let's see.... 60 minutes of reading, and a 10 minute chore. Seems like a plan! Almost finished with Boneshaker and I'll need to choose another. I'm thinking I'll go back to L. Penny's books. I did a little inventory yesterday and I already have a couple on the Kindle that I need to read. Today is as good a day as any. Happy Labor Day to you who like I onlyworks when we feel like it. Nice.

>10 kidzdoc: I'm finding the opposite to be true, Darryl. I've been sleeping quite soundly over this holiday weekend. It's the job that brings me awake for "no reason" in the middle of the dark spell. So, in your medical opinion, shouldn't I retire?

Thank you for the lovely thought about the cookies but things with sugar are on the awful no good list so I'll just leave them here for everyone else. Now the cauliflower, however....

Well really, what else did all those labor "agitators" labor FOR?

I read some this morning. I want to finish Rough Passage today, so I should give it some attention.

eta

and some True Blood later....

>18 maggie1944: Hi Karen44! What *are* you waiting for?! Get to Pennyin'! Quick sticks, now.

>19 laytonwoman3rd: ...inspired...get the doc to prescribe retirement...just inspired.

>20 tiffin: Some fried cauliflower:


Some buffalo-wing style fried cauliflower:


Some Indian curried cauliflower patties:


A "healthier" alternative, cauliflower-cilantro-barley salad with olive oil & lemon dressing:


>22 mckait: OOooo True Blood! Which season are you up to?

does having a 21st thread mean your thread is now old enough to drink?

or vote?

does the nummy fried cauliflour by chance have smidge of curry in the frying stuff? If so, please send a plate this way. Thank you....oops sorry, got ahead of myself. The Indian curried cauliflour patties are just the thing! Some mint iced tea, some fresh nahm and we're all set. If it weren't precipitating in biblical proportions here right now, I'd be off to the market to get me a big cauliflour.

>24 magicians_nephew: Why vote when the Koch brothers can't be voted to the guillotine?

>25 tututhefirst: Curry and cauliflower go together well, don't they? I am a fan of roasted curried cauliflower, too. Especially with chicken since it hides the texture of the chicken, which I don't care a lot for.

You always bring a smile to my face! And thanks for the pitcher of Bloodys! Hit the spot! I love that poster in #21. It's perfect.

Who cares about the voting part? I like the drinking part! I think we should all have a glass of bubbly (or whatever your drink of choice may be) in favor of Richards thread's 21st anniversary!

Hip Hip! He's a jolly good fellow our Richard....bubbly is perfect for this drizzly afternoon. Too warm for a fire, but too chilly to sit out on screened porch. yeah....I know.....bitchbitchbitch.....

Hmmm - yes, I'll have a glass of the champagne and a plate of the deep fried cauliflower (hubby and I got addicted in Tunisia ages ago) thank you.

Right in there with tutu for the curried cauliflower patties! And, oh, just a bit of the cilantro salad, please and thanks. Crumb, now I want some Indian food.

>27 msf59: Heh, well now how can a man not smile when presented with a pitcher of Bloodys? Yeah, that makes the whole Labor Rights movement make more sense to me.

>28 tloeffler: Ohhh, yes please! Let's all slurp down some champers! What a great idea, TLo.

>29 tututhefirst: It's a weirdly betwixt-and-between day here, too. Simply too sticky for me to want to do anything, though, since it's guaranteed that whatever I do will result in puddles of sweat in places I prefer not to devote thought to.

>30 BekkaJo: Dig on in, Bekka! I love fried foods in general. I like crispy textures much more than soft ones.

>31 tiffin: Adding curry to most things makes them better. Most not meaning all! I had a raita once with curry added. That was NOT good.

Yummy! Fried cauliflower, curried cauliflower, cauliflower and barley salad. But blech to Ranch..... I realize I'm a mutant, not liking Ranch and all, so we'll ATD on the subject of Ranch Dressing.

Hang in there RD. Huges and smoochies to you from your own Horrible

>33 karenmarie: Freak! Mutant! Killer of christian babies!! Kill it kill it with fire it doesn't like ranch dressing!

Hell Horrible, I don't like chicken or corn on the cob, and I actively loathe turkey. We all hate something everyone else loves.

Kill it kill it with fire!! (I didn't say I was *forgiving* you for not liking ranch....)

Wow! That picture will wake you up! Of course, along with everyone else, I could not fall asleep until after 3 this morning, so I'm not that wide awake now. (Got up at 9 3 hours ago.) And I'll have a little bit of all the cauliflower offerings; they look wonderful, Richard. Not much happening today here either. We're avoiding the crowds by staying home--we can go to the beach tomorrow!

Love the shiny new thread, RD! I especially love all of the cauliflower offerings in post #23. Yumm. We have taken to making cauliflower rice - grate the washed cauliflower until it is in rice sized pieces and then pan fry it in some oil and lightly season it. it is great as an alternative to rice when we eat curry dishes that have rich sauces to them... also helps to offset the heavier coconut milk/cream I like to make my curries with. ;-)

Happy Labour Day, Richard!

I'll have a beverage, thanks!

Well! That was refreshing. Another stone passed about two hours ago. Ye goddesses, I hope this isn't going to become a weekly occurrence. But the ache not going away is at last explained, and the difference now is amazing. No more than a residual ouchiness.

>35 ronincats: Hi Roni! Yeah, the advantage of retirement is not *having* to fight crowds. Have some broccoli/cilantro/barley salad.

>36 lkernagh: Hi Lori, glad to see you with your excellent suggestion that's never occurred to me. My housies won't eat the stems and this gives me a great idea what to do with them. Maybe with broccoli stems, too. Thanks!

>37 mckait: The bar is open, madame, help yoursef:

>Yes me too!

I had to snicker a little at the Pelligrino on the bottom (at least that's what it looks like from here). The teacher I work with has traded a diet Coke habit for Pelligrino and the kids were giving her suspicious looks. She had to explain to them that it was justwater - not something stronger.

>39 avidmom: Happy hepyersef day! Heh, I guess drinking water out of a big green bottle with furrin writin' on it isn't a road to easy acceptance before college.

Presented without comment.

Italy was fun because I got REAL Pellegrino. I love how you have to differentiate between sparkling water and still water abroad.

Glad you passed another KStone, RD. *smooches* from the "Freak! Mutant! Killer of christian babies!! Kill it kill it with fire it doesn't like ranch dressing!". You know you love me.

#41 *drool*

>42 karenmarie: Run! If you do not wish to meet your just and condign fate!

Oh dear. I am very late to the party, Richard. We are celebrating the arrival of a new thread and the departure of a stone - sounds excellent. I'll just join Kathleen at the bar, shall I? *smooch for you, scratch behind the ears for Stella*

Very few people use "condign" and I bet even fewer use it properly. Well done, sir!

Lucy...you got some splainin to do! Splainin done at Joe's cafe.

xoxo to you and Stella

>44 Crazymamie: Oh, it's all right, Mamie. I'm accustomed to being *chinwobble* last on the visiting list and *teardrop* of lesser importance than your real friends.

Stella sends slurps.

>45 tiffin: Heh. I love that word, Tui. Read it in a John Varley novel 30-35 years ago. Cannot for the life of me recall which one, though. Evil time-traveling dwarf, somewhat dense MC.

>46 luvamystery65: I was unaware of your misfortunate lack of exposure to La Penny, Roberta. I've been inside the bubble here since 2006, so I forget that others don't have my advantages.

It's been a while since we had a drink together Mamie :)

oh, Hi rd... Do you have the house to yourself today?

>48 mckait: As from 30min ago. It's BLISSFUL.

Happy Quiet Tuesday, Richard. Glad to hear the stone passed (relief!!).

Blueberry lemon pound cake, dear?

There is an awful lot of good food in these threads!

#49 September has opened with masses of heat :/ Le sigh...

Also, I spotted a bottle of Ranch dressing in one of our supermarkets the other day for the first time ever. Made me think of you :)

>50 EBT1002: Thank you, Ellen! Have fun at work today.

>51 Crazymamie: Oh yes, please. Coffee?


>52 mckait: Ain't that the gawd's honest truth! *smooch*

>53 BekkaJo: To be honest, Bekka, I'm not a huge fan of ranch dressing on salads. I like it as a dip for crudite, and after that it's only okay. I confess I use the dry packets of ranch dressing to coat chicken thighs and potatoes before I roast them. For most stuff, I prefer vinaigrette or oil-and-vinegar if the vinegar's any good.

Yes, please!

If I don't place an order at Amazon at least once a month, I get concerned phone calls from their customer care people.

Once a month? You have more control than I do! I like to tell myself that I am ordering for six, but really, most of it is for Abby and me! Okay, mostly me.

*AT LEAST* once a month. More like once a week. I use the rationalization that I'm housebound. But the fact is I just want the damn books!

Oh. Okay then.

I'm a hopeless Amazon user, too. Most recently for some, ahem, poetry recommended by Paul C. *ducks*

Your thread-topper is hilarious, Richard, including the "Cocktails!" caption. Hmm, what will they be saying to each other as they gaze upon it?

Happy new (to me) thread Richard! Sorry you're having stones, but I'm glad to read they are passing.... That's better than the alternative!

I will eat ranch if there is no alternative, but I prefer blue cheese for veggie dipping & Thousand Island for salads. Am I going to be tarred & feathered? ;)

>59 Crazymamie: *smooch*

>60 jnwelch: Poetry? Really? Do you have a rat infestation that needs driving out, or permaybehaps some in-laws that need to be bored into fleeing?

Octofred says "mmofffrrrmmff" for the compliment.

>61 TinaV95: BURN IT KILL IT "THOUSAND ISLAND" *retch*

Agree re: Thousand Islands. I love ketchup on burgers and fries, but that tastes like ketchup on salad. ew.

It's the anonychunks of whatnot that cause me emotional distress.

LOL

Huh! I'd need a cocktail too if I were watching a fight between an octopus and a large (sea?)snake.

I'm with you on the thousand island, RD ..can't stand the stuff myself. I prefer peppercorn ranch and blue-cheese dressing or if on salads, then plain good evoo.

>65 mckait: *bows*

>66 cameling: I don't ever *not* need a cocktail, so to me any sort of excuse will do.

Peppercorn ranch? I'll have to try that. Wait...it comes in bottles? Oh no thanks. I wonder where I can find a recipe.

I like peppercorn ranch, and cucumber ranch! Yummers.

So only one Guinness for me tonight... Margie crapped out on me again. Three months in a row :(
The librarians are going to be there, though. Bernie and Kathie at least, but probably not Donna. So.... I plan to go a wee bit early and treat myself to dinner. Debbie Wagner will be there, too . hmm.

Debbie?! Really! *ponders imminent end of Universe*

you have no idea

*bwaaaahaaaaaaahaaaaaa*

^ ha! Love that.

>54 richardderus: have fun at work today.

Sigh.

Actually, it wasn't half bad! And now I get to ride the bus (read: I get to read) and stop at the liberry for a book that's on hold. Life doesn't totally suck!

>72 EBT1002: I know, it's a riot, right?

I'm glad work wasn't a snakepit of horrors on your return. Makes the rest of the week look better.

Am off to shop the interwebz, see what trouble I can get myself into.

>71 richardderus: That is too funny!

Review: 48 of seventy-five

Title: MEATY: Essays

Author: Samantha Irby

Rating: 3.5* of five

The Publisher Says: Samantha Irby explodes onto the page in her debut collection of brand-new essays about being a complete dummy trying to laugh her way through her ridiculous life of failed relationships, taco feasts, bouts with Crohn's Disease, & more, all told with the same scathing wit & poignant candor long-time readers have come to expect from her notoriously hilarious blog, www.bitchesgottaeat.com.

In addition to co-hosting The Sunday Night Sex Show, a sex-positive live lit show, and Guts & Glory, a reading series featuring essayists, Samantha has performed all over Chicago. She opened for Baratunde Thurston during his "How to Be Black" tour. She has been profiled in the Chicago Sun-Times as well as in Time Out Chicago, and her work has appeared on The Rumpus and Jezebel. Samantha and partner Ian Belknap write a comedy advice blog at www.irbyandian.com.

I first reviewed this collection of essays for The Small Press Book Review.

My Review: It's good to be young. I remember that. I'm not young anymore, and frankly wouldn't be young again for all the money there is. But that's age's privilege, to celebrate itself. Every age's privilege, in fact, and Samantha Irby celebrates being young.

In a very testy way.

Hell, if I had Crohn's disease, I'd be testy too. In fact, I am testy, no Crohn's needed. But Irby gets testy over very young problems, as in the essay "Would Dying Alone Really Be So Terrible?":

I want to watch porn by myself, because a dude just won't let you take five minutes to masturbate without his dick thinking it's an invitation, and then that five minutes becomes twenty-five minutes (if you're lucky) of heat and sweat and effed-up hair and having to remake the bed and being late for work and even then, after all that grunting and shoving and groaning, you might STILL have to get your vibrator out while this motherfucker passes out on top of the shirt you'd taken out to wear to the office.

This is the kind of problem a lot of folks of either gender and all persuasions would enjoy having, if the dating sites' usage and match-up numbers aren't complete lies.

Irby's brand of testy humor gets a laugh-out-loud funny workout in her meditation on the American obsession with weight, weight loss, effort-free weight loss, and laziness in "The Tapeworm Diet." She appears, on her teensy little blog avatar, not to be an immensely large person, but I don't know this for a fact as I've never met the lady. She claims to be sizable: "I eat bad things and go to sleep immediately afterward. There, I solved the mystery of fatness for you. You're welcome." Garshk, and here I thought it was my slow metabolism!

Irby then goes on to skewer the un-fucking-believable idiotic should-be-illegal insanities out there for an unsuspecting public to follow as diets:

The Twinkie Diet.
A typical day in the life of Kansas State University nutrition researcher Mark Haub, creator of the Junk Food Diet, which consists of 60% junk food supplemented by a protein shake, multivitamin pills, and a can of green beans or four stalks of celery every day. He avoided meats, whole grains, and fruits. September 10, 2010: A double espresso; two servings of Hostess Twinkies Golden Sponge Cake; one Centrum Advanced Formula pill; one serving of Little Debbie Star Crunch cookies (my jam!); a Diet Mountain Dew (barf); half a serving of Doritos Cool Ranch corn chips; two servings of Kellogg's Corn Pops cereal; a serving of whole milk (squirt!); half a serving of raw baby carrots; one and a half servings of Duncan Hines Family Style Chewy Fudge brownie; half a serving of Little Debbie Zebra Cake; one serving of Muscle Milk Protein Shake drink; Total: 1589 calories.
Just reading that shit makes my fucking teeth hurt. I think I also might've just caught diabetes through the computer screen. This can't be life, right? Snack cakes and baby carrots? NO IT CANNOT.

Sing it, soul-daughter. Couldn't have said it better myownself. The spoiledness of the average American is never in more breathtaking relief than in diet advice and weight-loss program information. Most people on the planet would like to have enough food to get full once a day. People here eat so much they need advice on how not to turn into land-blimps. Something is wrong with this picture. Samantha Irby makes you giggle as she pokes your social conscience, so permaybehaps people who need to hear will listen without realizing what they're hearing. It's the only way past their privileged-person defenses, the evidence shows.

The collection is far and away best taken in doses. It's like any smorgasbord. The offerings are tempting, and the urge to overindulge is strong. Resist the urge that you not grow indifferent to the charms of the groaning board! Read one or two of these tempting treats. Put the book down, pick up something grim and joyless for a contrast...are you caught up on your Bolaño reading? isn't there a new Murakami or something?...and then come back to laugh and learn.

Wait! I didn't mean learn! I meant enjoy! Enjoy, not something hard and boring like learn!


This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License.

#43 *sniff* Had to look up condign.

Might as well get it out into the open right now and face the un-condign condemnation - I like Thousand Island too.

Have a SUPER day, RD! Off to work.....

Thousand Island dressing is vile. I'm not sure which is worse, it or Miracle Whip.

Thumbed. Glad you read it, but I never will :P

erg... both Thousand Islands and Miracle Whip are worse than each other.

>77 kidzdoc: Miracle Whip.

Morning, dear! Loved your review up there. That Twinkie Diet would totally work - just reading through the description makes you lose your appetite! YIKES!

Good morning, Richard. There was once upon a time some "diet" bread where on the ingredients list they confessed they used sawdust! Sawdust. It was to add bulk with a undigestible ingredient. My thought was, "only in America will people go to the store and trade their hard earned money for a substance labelled as food, which in fact is not food, just to lose weight". Sigh.

>76 karenmarie: ...you do...really? You're not just sayin' that to get me all wound up, are you? *shudder*

I will have a glorious day because I'm alone with my Stella and a lot of silence for reading and general absorption. It's cool, as it always is within a day or so of Labor Day around here, and sunshiney. Very lovely fall day.

>77 kidzdoc: They use Miracle Whip to make thousand island. No, not kidding, I looked it up. *retch*

>78 mckait: Thanks! Yeah, you should *totally* avoid ever getting near this book. As for MW and thousand island, see above...*retch*

>79 Crazymamie: I don't entirely disagree, Mamie. MW is the Ur-evil of thousand island.

I know, right?! I read that and imagine myself to be the thinnest, sanest person in Murrika.

>80 maggie1944: The food giants use "cellulose" in "100% grated parmesan cheese" too...the 100% modifies grated, not parmesan...and that's just fancy for sawdust.

As a completely horrifying and disgusting aside, a diet cookbook from 1950 had a recipe for...drum roll please...MINERAL OIL MAYONNAISE.

The mind boggles, the spirit quails.

Not to brag...okay, I'm bragging!...at #23 on the Top Posts list for SFSignal, Hugo-winning blog, is my Jay Lake Read-A-Thon guest post. I'm happy because it means a lot to me that people PAY ATTENTION to the gifts Lake gives us. Now say your thank-yous before Mr. Lake leaves, like good boys and girls.

^Cool!!!!!!

Richard, your review of MEATY: Essays is excellent! I might see if I can get a copy to read in small doses.

ETA: And your guest post is awesome. Thanks for the link.

Thanks, Ellen! I appreciate that you took the time to read it.

Congrats my darling....it's nice to see others acknowledge what we all know-- that you are a primo reviewer. If RD says it's worth reading, then I at least know it's worthy of more than a cursory glance. If he says it's drivel, I feel safe in avoiding it, unless it is a topic about which I know we often disagree (e.g., religion).

MW vx TI---ugh -best weight loss tool in the world? Just contemplating either of those ingredients in anything makes the puke factor rise.

OTOH, the thoughts are so disgusting that one must turn to booze, fresh fruit tarts, ice cream (the real stuff) and marcona almonds to drown out the evil brain pictures and smells and tastes generated by the twin yuckies. Thus not a weight loss tool at all at all....

>86 tututhefirst: Awww! Thank you, Tina...I am all blushsome.

Weight loss be damned, lady, it's National Macadamia Nut Day and they's celebratory snackin' to be done!

(I suspect we're going to agree on Bob's book, too, I was up late reading it!)

Macadamias...did you say Macadamias? I was just trying to decide how it wanted to fix some fish for din din tonite....methinks a macnut encrusted piece of tilapia will fill the bill. Smooches.

Macadamia Nut Cookies. YUM.

>88 tututhefirst: A favorite of mine is brown-butter/nut "sauce" over tilapia. Browning the butter with the nuts added at the last ~2min means everything tastes so num! (Oh, and add shallots if there are any.) *smooch*

>89 EBT1002: *swoon* I adore macadamia-nut cookies! With or without that lardy, useless "white chocolate" that has no cocoa butter in it so how can it be chocolate it's just carnauba wax and high-fructose corn syrup so let's not call it chocolate k?

Dinner is at 7:30....shall I set a place at the table? There will be a nice grain, zuccinni tomato salad (faro, lentils, orzo and red quinoa)...might even do some grilled corn cobs if you come!

EEEEEEEEEEEEEECCCCCCCCCCCHHHHHHHHHHHH you had me until the corn cobs. I am not a hog being fattened for slaughter so I do not eat silage. EW.

I found a recipe for a summer grain-based salad on Pinterest the other day, but it was barley (which I like). I've so far managed not to try quinoa...I didn't know it came in colors!

I worked at a restaurant one college summer (for $1/hour) that made its own thousand island dressing--mayo, ketchup and pickle relish.

Stopping by to see what's happening in the happening place - love that 1984-2012 funny.

I concur that thousand island is gross. Isn't it just ketchup and mayonnaise??? And something..... horseradish? No seriously. One more thing.

Roni and I posted simultaneously I think!

Quinoa is pretty good - esp in a 'southwest salad' form. Rilly.

I can do without 1000 Island, too. I do like horse radish, though. Is that in there? Didn't seem like it when I tasted it back in the days when we had a horse and buggy.

Oh. Wait a minute; I do like Thousand Island or Russian dressing on reuben sandwiches.

*hangs head in shame*

Dislike T.I., despise M.W. (erg), hate carrots, parsnips, and beef liver.

I'm pretty good with everything else; oh, yeah, anything faked turns me off. Permanently. Which applies to more things than food.

>94 sibylline: sweet pickle bits--those are the islands? i used to love 1000 island dressing. then i grew up and now, were i to use it, it would be Apollo's organic Sierra olive oil. it's the best i've ever tasted. a nice balsamic vinegar or lemon, garlic and the least little bit of salt is all i need. periodissimo!

extended *smooch* dispensal.

More food.... this is getting ridiculous...

I'll have some corn cobs :)

I hate carrots, parsnips, and beef liver, too. Unless the carrot is baked into a cake...

So pleased I stopped by just in time not have missed out on the macadamia celebrations!
Good review in #75 of a book I will certainly never read.

>93 ronincats: Mayo, Roni? It's always tasted to me like MW, and the interwebz recipes say MW...*shudder* So it's got to be sweet relish then. *cleans teeth*

>94 sibylline:, 95 If it has horseradish, I can't detect it. I'm with Kath, it's like putting ketchup on your lettuce.

I'll have to try quinoa at some point.

>96 jnwelch: I think the buggy whip would be needed to get the stuff in me at this point.

>97 kidzdoc: DARRYL!! You eat MIRACLE WHIP when you eat those?!? Knowingly??? *passes out from shock*

>98 Matke: Carrots, parsnips, and beef liver are all aces with me. I am so with you on fake foods. I'd rather not eat something than eat a "lite" or "reduced fat" version of it because the days when I thought it was fun to treat my body as a chemistry experiment are long passed.

>99 mirrordrum: *smooch* back...that's the kind of dressing I like best, too.

>100 mckait: Hi Kath! But, you know, you also eat dried mashed potatoes. *shudder* They crust things well, but as a table-food? Nay nay nay. Bet they'd be excellent as paste.

>101 PaulCranswick: Yeah, Paul, I think it's unlikely to make your life-list, so avoiding it is probably sensible. Macadamias rule!

I am definitely moving in the direction of not eating anything which has been messed with. I like real food. I never did "give up" butter and use all those other things.

I hope you will forgive me for chatting on occasion about the anti-inflammatory foods class I'm about to start. I can say without hesitation that this woman is all about eating only real food. Fruits, veggies, and some proteins like meat, fish, eggs, chickens..... we'll see if we can get the RA to quiet down a bit. It would be a great advantage.

Meanwhile, I have no problem eating all that can be posted here and over at Joe's cafe, too. And I'll see if I can find out how much they want for the Olympia Beer Brewery buildings....

>103 maggie1944: I wasn't ever much of a boxed-food eater. I'd rather make it myself most of the time, unless it stinks (frying fish, oh nonono). I like eggs a lot, and chicken not at all.

Go forth and investigate! *smooch*

http://unicorn.namegeneratorfun.com/

My unicorn name is:
Clover Snowy Ears
Clover is always as happy as a clam. He is as white as the driven snow, and he loves to play cupid.

HOURS I've spent on here.

I have to admit to loving Miracle Whip as a kid--a teaspoon on jello was dessert! But my tastes HAVE matured.

>106 ronincats: My throat closes at the mere notion.

Well, I do know that when I over indulge in the forbidden foods the RA raises its ugly head. Left wrist is all swollen and sore and left hand is as weak as a newborn baby this morning. Dang.

I just bought another Cherie Priest book but as it only receives three stars on Amazon I'm prepared for it to not necessarily make me as happy as Boneshaker did.

My unicorn name is:
Peachy Pied Lady
Peachy is a gifted singer and musician. She is gaily piebald like a pony, and she changes the weather.

Damn you rd

Lavender Velvet Cheeks.

The mind boggles.

You do find some strange things, RD.

*smooches for Thursday!* from Horrible

I bit.

My unicorn name is: Sorrel Pretty Reins. Sorrel is mischievous and nosey. He is as pretty as a picture, and he casts mischievous spells.

And as such he is a royal pain in the A** some days.

Oh, why not.

My unicorn name is: Sunflower Beautiful Boy

Sunflower is kind and caring. He is as beautiful as the morning, and he casts spells of beauty.

Perfect!

Mine is: Grass Lovely Horse

Grass loves to look after the other unicorns. He is as lovely as the day is long,
and he chases the nightmares away.

Damn right I do.

:)

Now see what you've done?

So my unicorn name is: Rose Rainbow Damsel

Rose is wistful and creative. She is rainbow-coloured and bright, and she brings great fortune and riches.

I just don't know. This seems a bit fussy for me. I mean...wistful? Couldn't I be avenging instead? And I'm not sure about the rainbow-coloured part either because I do not look good in orange. I think I want to be mischievous and nosy like Karen.

Hmph. Some of these unicorns are rather grumpy. ;-)

I like my new name. If Ron Artest can change his name to Metta World Peace, I don't see why I can't do the same. I'll go to the NJ Department of Records to apply for a name change.

*skips gaily through the meadows of Pennsylvania, dances across the Delaware River to New Jersey, casts spells of beauty on the crackheads in Trenton*

>108 maggie1944: I have those, too. Eggplant, lobster (sob), lamb (wail), all *instant" inflammation. I have to be sparing with the nightshades (peppers, potatoes, tomatoes) or trouble will eventually brew. Likewise whole grains...can't make the "healthy" whole-grain breads and pastas and crackers the standards or the problems creep up.

The only foods I can eat abundantly and have no problems with are things I dislike. Corn, chicken, etc...eat hearty! *yaaak* No.

>109 mckait: Hi Peachy! Change the weather, make it 50F for the next, oh I dunno, decade or so kthxbye

>110 karenmarie: Lavender daaaaaarrrrrliiing! So good to see your velvet cheeks this bright morn! *smooch*

>111 maggie1944: Sorrel Pretty Reins! I like that one.

>112 kidzdoc: *boggle* Sunflower. Beautiful Boy. *double boggle* That's, that's, well that's ummm indescribable, that is.

>113 NielsenGW: Hi Gerard! Nice to see you. As long as you're chasing nightmares away, could you do something about *boggle* Sunflower up there, before the picture of him in a poncho wearing love beads and huaraches gets stuck too deeply into my subconscious?

>114 mckait: Yes, isn't it fun?

>115 Crazymamie: All unicorns can avenge and be nosy, you just do it wistfully, Miss Rainbow Damsel. *smooch*

>116 kidzdoc: Too late, Gerard.

Uh oh, I came to visit and I'm not sure I can read much of your thread today, Richard. I'm home with a really awful tummy bug and words about food are not tolerable at the moment. Sigh.

Other than that, I hope you're having a good Thursday. It's thunderstorming in Seattle. Nice.

>119 EBT1002: Oh no! That sounds hideous. I'm so sorry. The thunderstorm should make it better, though. Feel better soon.

You do find the strangest things Richard. Oh well at least it is never boring around here:)

My unicorn name is: Orchid Snowy Mane

Orchid is as wild and untamed as a desert horse. She is as white as the driven snow, and she casts love spells.

Ok...you asked for it....

Nightshade Fair Coat

Nightshade is often very naughty and is always being told off.
She is handsome to look upon, and she climbs the mountains of the world.

YACK...

Daisy Delightful Horse

Daisy is a very clever horse with deep, mysterious eyes.
She is a delight to be around, and she chases the nightmares away.

I love this, though it bears no resemblance to me whatsoever :-)

Thyme Blue Mane is my unicorn mane.

Thyme is a graceful dancer.
He is as blue as the sky,
and he casts love spells.

I can hear my snarky kids gagging even from a distance.

>121 calm: I do, don't I Orchid my dear? Now don't get that Snowy Mane all over my clean floors!

>122 tututhefirst: Oh my, Tina. Just...well, oh my.

>123 katiekrug: Daisy darling! So good to see you. I suspect some nightmares will remain unchased, based on your response.

>124 jnwelch: Gagging? *retch* Really *uuurrrp* I can't imagine *ralph* why you'd imagine them GAGGING, Mr. Blue Mane! *hurl*

Look at what I started by admitting my love for Thousand Island!! My mom used to make it from scratch at home (ketchup, mayo, pickle relish) and that's when I fell in love. I'm sorry RD. I know I have grievously disappointed you. Perhaps one day I can make it up to you.

Does my enjoyment of blue cheese help soften the blow at all?? LOL

I loved your review of Meaty. A big thumbs up from me!

To bow to peer pressure, I did the unicorn thingy. My unicorn name is Primrose Rainbow Mane.

Here's the explanation:
Primrose is rebellious and strong-willed. She is rainbow-coloured and bright, and she casts love spells.

Seems quite a lot of us lately are capable of casting love spells. ;)

Ketchup, mayo, pickle relish...individually things I like, collectively a satanic plot to destroy the happiness of the Universe. I've always felt sure that the anonybits of whatnot in that execrable fluid were chunks of raw newt-flesh or chopped gobbets of gristle or something.

Permaybehaps they use Kraft *shudder* mayo or something....

I thought you might appreciate this, Richard, assuming I didn't get it from your thread in the first place...

My unicorn name is:
Lily Charming Legs
Lily is generous of spirit and always thinks the best of others.
She is charming and cheerful,
and she dances away the thunderstorms.

Thank you, Richard. I really needed that today!

ETA: I must admit, however, that I don't think the best of ALL the others....

>128 Ape: HA! Priceless, Stephen, truly priceless. I sense a new clothing item in my future.

>129 tloeffler: Lily! How Charming-Legged of you to stop in! *giggle*

Violet Blue Mane?!?!
She takes care of other unicorns.
Dear goddesses, does it never end?

A huge smooch for the amusement value of your thread today.

Ugh. My unicorn name is Snapdragon Charming Moon. It says that I'm kind and caring, charming and cheerful. Ha!

But then, these are Unicorn names!

Fern Rainbow Moon.

I like to tease other unicorns.
I am rainbow coloured and bright and love to dance on moonbeams.
Mm hmmm. Right.

>128 Ape: That 'splains a lot!!!

>1 richardderus: wow- that is some sea creature! And I just know what it was going to be as it slowly loaded on my ancient computer.

>12 PaulCranswick: LOL! Good one Paul, I see that too :)

Eek, I have to run now as kids are freaking out and dad is nowhere to be seen! I'll be back :)

Peachy Dapple Nose

"Peachy is a gifted singer and musician. She is a dappled beauty, and she makes wishes into horses."

Obviously much sought after by beggars, I suppose. At least it explains all these little brown spots - dappling!

(I had to add my middle name to get something remotely interesting. Is that cheating?)

Hi RD- Just swinging through. I just walked back from our homeowners meeting and it is deliciously cool out there. Low 50s tonight. Sweet!
Hope you had a good day!

Poppy Pink Foal---at least I help children with their bad dreams.

Wonderful review of Meaty: Essays which has somehow landed on my teetering tower. Duly thumbed. Now I have to go check out your award winning blog post.

>131 Matke: *smooch* for my dear Violet, I mean Danvers.

>132 EBT1002: Oh my, yes, that name generator has definitely hiccuped with you, hasn't it o caring professional? *tosses shoulder hair*

>133 avidmom: What kind of footwear is required to dance on moonbeams, I wonder?

>134 LovingLit: Dad is nowhere to be seen? That could get worrisome.

>135 ffortsa: No, not cheating when it nets you "Peachy Dapple Nose!" That is too funny.

>136 msf59: It's cool here, too, and I am so so so so so happy because they're predicting only 71° tomorrow. Yum yum yummy.

>137 brenzi: I'm surprised and pleased that Meaty: Essays has made it onto your list, Bonnie. I hope the blog post meets the legendarily high Poppy Pink Foal standards.

My unicorn name is:
Violet Rainbow Filly
Violet loves to look after the other unicorns. She is rainbow-coloured and bright, and she casts spells of plenty and bounty.

Ah, Dr. Rainbow Filly, so nice of you to stop in and cast a spell of bounty and plenty! It's getting to be time to do something serious about the Tome Home...that bounty will come in handy.

Snapdragon Jolly Lady reporting in, after a long absence.

Good morning, RD! Find us another fun name generator. Pretty please.

*smooches on this alas, not-last-day-of-the-workweek-for-me*

Horrible

I had to check the mirror this morning to make sure I didn't wake up a unicorn...because before going to sleep last night, I tweaked the weather down to *cool*. That thing works!

>142 avatiakh: Hiya Snapdragon! Glad to see you here all Jolly and Lady-like.

>143 karenmarie: I'll do my poor best. Boo hiss on having to work the weekend!

>144 mckait: And I can't thank you enough for it! Lovely morning here. Went outside in my culottes and t-shirt to enjoy having *good* goosebumps for once.

Strength is overrated.

i started laughing with Rose Rainbow Damsel away back up there and have continued laughing so hard my food repository hurts. oh! and i am surrounded by worshiping worshipers of the dark lord wanting food. you people are too funny. you do a body good! must away to serve the dark worshipers. *exeunt omnes worshiping and chortling*

Mark this date, laddies and gentlewomen. Mark it in red, and transfer it to next year's calendar.

I have just spoken to A HELPFUL, PLEASANT BUREAUCRAT who resolved one of the nagging issues I've had with her bureaucracy. It's a small one, to be sure, a matter of the aforementioned bureaucracy returning $50 or so, but she DID IT. AND WAS PLEASANT while doing it.

good god Gertie!

>149 mirrordrum: I know, right?! I expected to see pigs sailing through the welkin and arboreal trout!

50$? Okay, that's a start and hopefully a harbinger of good things to come.

Your keyboard, the goddesses' inbox!

>148 richardderus: A HELPFUL, PLEASANT BUREAUCRAT Wow! Will wonders never cease. You must have turned on your mighty charms Richard.

Yah, for a "PLEASANT BUREAUCRAT". As rare as a white elk. Enjoy that sweet cool weather!

Mamie- Love the flying pigs! I think it was Roger Water's birthday, either today or yesterday, so perfect timing.

welkin. now that is one gorgeous word. a word to cause the kissing of the fingertips. now to just get the brain to put it in long term storage. welkin, welkin, welkin.

I'm glad you had one really nice thing happen today. Were there some others? What'cha reading?

I spent hours, I'll tell you hours, trying to find all the bits and pieces I need to finish up my much procrastinated 2012 Income Taxes. Almost done, I think.

Movin' on into the reading mode now.

Richard bureaucrats in Malaysia are generally helpful if you talk their lingo (the white-skin Johor accent is a constant source of wonder for them) and most things can be settled here with a smile or, failing that, a small bribe!

This message is coming to you from Elm Fair Prince who is apparently handsome to look upon, is good humoured, brings good cheer and is certain to have wealth showered upon him. How the hell that got mixed up with me heaven only knows.

Have a great weekend.

My unicorn name is:
Tulip Delightful Damsel
Tulip is a little bossy boots. She is a delight to be around, and she brings great fortune and riches.

>153 Crazymamie: Ha! Exactly, Mamie.

>154 brenzi: Amazing, right Bonnie? Considering I have no charms to deploy.

>155 msf59: White elk might as well be cockroaches, Mark.

>156 mirrordrum: I've always liked "welkin" too, Ellie, it's so much more expressive somehow than mere "sky" or religiosified "heavens".

>157 maggie1944: I'm pleased on any day when something pleasant happens, Karen44. Makes the world a brighter, better place. And I think I was able to return the favor by praising the 'crat to the skies in a conversation with her supervisor.

>158 PaulCranswick: Elm Fair Prince! Oh my, I do love that...Hani would get a big kick out of it, as will...I mean would!...the kids. *evil, scheming leer*

>159 sibylline: Tulip! Darling Caligulina! *smooch* for those riches and that fortune headin' on down south.

Hey RD! I thought all punning activities were reserved for the cafe this weekend?

Pun? *batbat* Moi, monsieur? I pun not.

Heh.

This is Lavender Velvet Cheeks, signing in for my 2 minute catch up before the calamities of the early evening descend on the household, which for 3 weeks more, still consists of 2 pre-schoolers. Which is well enough pre-schoolers for me in my current state.

Elm Fair Prince, is rather a dashing name to match our debonair friend :)

Off and away I fly (unicorns can fly, can't they?) to aid and assist (read: do it all myself) in dinner preparation for my progeny.

Ah, dinner...that perennial conundrum. I relate. Cook this, that one's unhappy, cook that, this one's not gonna eat.

Shut up and eat it. I wonder sometimes if I'm not simply the perfect example of the Mean Old Man. My tolerance for nonsense goes ever-downward.

Hurray for a helpful, pleasant bureaucrat! Have a good weekend, Richard.

Adding my hurrahs for the sighting of the illusive beastie! It does remind me that I need to go the tax office thought which I doubt will be anywhere near as pleasant an experience :(

Weekend smoochies XX

Happy Saturday, BigDaddy!

>148 richardderus: Must have been new on the job, and hadn't time to read the manual yet. She'll probably be reprimanded, and that'll learn 'er.

yeah! What Mamie sez.

>166 wilkiec: Thanks, Diana! I plan to. Beautiful day here.

>167 BekkaJo: Oh gosh, the tax office. Yuck. Seldom if ever a good experience. I think there's something about being universally reviled that gets under a person's skin.

>168 Crazymamie: *smooch* for Da Craze (your rapper name)

>169 laytonwoman3rd: Gawd, Linda3rd, what a horrible (though quite probable) outcome. It's never good to be the best, because then people get jealous and upset.

I hate people.

>170 maggie1944: *smooch* for Karen44, too

Oh, I LOVE my rapper name!!

What is this "enough" of which you speak?

#171 I work in supposed 'tax haven' corporate finance... like I don't get enough sh*t at work! But yeah... tax = bottom of the line IMO!

As much as I hate paying taxes of any sort, I have to empathize with the people who work in tax offices. How miserable a job it must be to be the front line of rate-payer abuse.

Yup - specially over here where they must get so so may pi**y wives saying 'Why can't I find out about my taxes?' Only legal response open to poor tax worker... 'Because your husband hasn't sent us a letter saying you can access information about your own taxes...'.

I would hate to be the one delivering THAT particular line!

Review: 49 of seventy-five

Title: THE BABY KILLERS

Author: JAY LAKE

Rating: 4* of five

The Publisher Says: "Within our tale, gentle reader, you will see writ before you a palimpsest of low living and high misdemeanor, and the curious redresses that are visited as a result thereof . . ."

In The Baby Killers, Jay Lake restages mankind's Fall from Grace as an alternate-history steampunk fable. Written in a style of rambunctious Victoriana-that-never-was, this novella is set in Philadelphia in 1907, when that city serves as the seat of the British Dominion of the Americas, and as a Pandora's Box of sin and vice. The Governor-General has a taste for violating innocents, while the good Dr. Scholes uses them to fashion his mechanized agents of Justice. The Gollinoster, a feminine incarnation of angry retribution, wanders beneath the city streets - and an undying creature of ancient destruction is rushing to meet her. Villains and heroes (categories that overlap significantly) battle in a story of debauchery, degradation, radical experimentation, mad metaphysics . . . and a farting Frenchman.

Both popular culture and actual history are mined here to create a tale in which the use of idealized technology meets our darkest desires . . . and the result is positively electric.

My Review: Never let it be said or implied or even thought that Jay Lake is anything other than adventurous. This is an exuberant trip into a sick, weird vision of a sick, weird culture.

Much like our own.

Don't believe me?

{She} stood sobbing in front of her house. She, who had not cried since age ten when her brother took her virginity in the upstairs maid's room. ... There had probably been six people in the house when {the girl} exploded into flames. Two were girls from her list, valuable members of her stock book.

If this doesn't remind you of the response of the owners to the Bangladeshi clothing-factory collapse, and the BP America president's response to the Deepwater Horizon disaster, you're not paying attention.

The Baby Killer of the title isn't what you think it is. Well, it sort-of is; but not really because it's so much worse than what you think it is: Dr. Scholes uses the living brains of babies to power his retribution machines, his Robocops of steam, which of course means the babies qua babies are dead, though their "lives" are continuing and are augmented by Countess Lovelace's punchtape difference engines.

Drone-using teenaged soldiers, anyone?

So that's the book's level of success. It's a dark and bitter look at the endless and boundless vileness of humanity, and it's a cautionary tale told too late about the price extracted from us all for the sin of hubris, and it's darkly funny as well as starkly moral. It's compact, at 68pp, and so it's impossible to overdose on the grims. It's got a farting Frenchman as its Angel of Justice. It's, well, it's surreal and it's weird and I can think of no good reason for you not to buy and read it.

So go already. Amazon doesn't run on air.


This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License.

This is just for you Mr D



Barter Books in Alnwick is awesome

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH

Lurvely, John. I hate you!

Okay been catching up, .... Now I know I shouldn't ask but what is the 'miracle whip' delicacy you speak of ?

Blinded by fury at FB which has gone crazy
GAh!
*Throws modem in river*

>180 roundballnz: Miracle Whip.



It's the evil second cousin of mayonnaise, having a slippery slimy noxious texture and a flavor reminiscent of emulsified snot, baby batter, and pimple squeezings left in the sun to rot over the course of several months, the liquids being topped up by frequent additions of cheap perfume and the innards of squid.

>181 mckait: What happened? All I see is you changed your avi. It looks like it should.

>147 mirrordrum: and i am surrounded by worshiping worshipers of the dark lord wanting food
I laughed so hard at that line that I snorted! I have a cold and very little voice so it sounded extremely odd!

I love you and all your shenanigans, Richard!! :)

I just remembered that in Isaac's Storm someone's clever quote is written...something like...If I owned Texas and Hell, I'd rent out Texas and live in Hell.
Ha! I thought of you.

>183 TinaV95: I think you are a primary shenaniganeuse, Mrs. Lisa. *smooch*

>184 LovingLit: Yeah, a Yankee general said that...so true, it is so so true. Over 40C at least 100 days a year. YEEECCCHHH

>182 richardderus: Mayonnaise is the bane of my existence. I've never heard Miracle Whip described so eloquently and nauseatingly perfectly before!

>185 richardderus: Benedict Cumberbatch said that! Wait till I tell my BBC Sherlock/Cumberbatch this one!

182 > ah so up there with that other delicacy "cheese in a bottle" ...... good to know we escaped that one!

Oh I loved Isaac's Storm so much!
I like mayo! Dislike MW. So much!

So, it's Sunday! I know how pleased you must be?

I am fascinated by home made mayo; the rest can stay on the grocery shelf.

It's not that hard to make mayo - but..... it isn't just there in the fridge...... I like Cain's canola mayo enough that I quit bothering. It has its own flavor, but it's quite good. At least I have convinced myself that it is.......

What a lousy fucking day this has been. It will continue to be lousy, too.

Oh, I'm sorry. I hope something or some one turns it around.

I am so sorry about the lousy fuckery of today. Eat something decadently sweet, re-read a particularly wonderful book, smooch Stella.....

*smooches* from Horrible

Are you or someone you love in hospital?

Sorry to hear your having a lousy day, have a coffee, pick up a good book or peruse some good book porn. Hope your day improves.

It's not getting any better. I'm now so annoyed by the big issues that the fact that the ginger ale I asked them to get is the kind that has both high-fructose corn syrup AND aspartame, or the "hurry up and die" blend.

It's bad when something that level of petty pisses one off.

>I so totally get it.

Me, too. Icky stuff - HFCS and aspartame - and I consider it to be the devil's doing.

Of course, I don't believe in god or the devil so I guess that does not do me much good, does it? Walking down the aisles in the grocery store, I look around, and silently chant: poisons, poisons, all are poisons.

Faking nice is wearing.

Make it so.

And a happy Monday to you too, RD!

*smooch*

HAPPY Monday? Hmmm. oxymoron?

Morning RD- I hope today is a much better day for you and our wicked heat stays away from you. Fingers crossed.

Coffee!!! coffee!!! thank you, gods and goddesses.

Wish me luck in the Wednesday Powerball!

Of course, if not me, then YOU!

If you win on Wednesday, Richard, maybe we'll finally get the Tome Home off the shelf and the dirigible cafe off the ground.

Then life is better, yes?

sending cossetting thoughts to you, smoochiepusspup.

*smooooooooch*

Good morning, dear!

Oh Mamie.. that pancake pic ! ye gods!

Powerball mojo >>>>>>>

>187 roundballnz: Escaping cheese in a bottle is a minimum requirement for a happy life, I'm pretty sure, Alex.

>188 laytonwoman3rd: How wonderful! I love the expression on the bird's face!

>189 mckait:, 190, 191 Mayo is delicious, whether home-made or bottled. They are completely different things, though. Home-made mayo is fattier and heavier than the commercial whipped stuff that has carrageenan gum in it to give it that awesome texture. Egg salad is impossible without commercial mayo, as are deviled eggs. I made a tiny batch of mayo with a dying lemon and the last tiny vapors of a bottle of dijon mustard last week, and had eggs mayonnaise made with it. It's a totally different thing, the eggs are sliced not chopped and there is thinly sliced cucumber, carrot, and radish.

>193 maggie1944: Thanks for the wishes, Karen44. It stayed lousy until yesterday evening. Better now, thank the gawdesses.

>194 karenmarie: Thanks, Horrible! I haven't read more than 20pp in the past three days. I watched every BBC documentary I could find on YouTube. Then all the Discovery Channel ones and NatGeo ones on Netflix. Stories just made me mad.

>195 laytonwoman3rd: I'd've preferred that.

>196 johnsimpson: Thank you, John, quite kind indeed of you to stop and offer good wishes!

>198 avidmom: Thanks...it felt petty to get pissed about it, but c'mon! You've known me for over a quarter century, I've said ALWAYS that artificial stuff is nasty, and you come home with this?!

I dumped it down the drain and recycled the bottle so seeing it wouldn't make me mad again.

>199 maggie1944: I don't believe in the christian gawd as a force for universal good and kindness...how does that work, condemning all those to hell who don't "know Jeebus", and being a force for good?...but I'm becoming more and more sure that she's actually the malign, vile, evil force that actually does control the Universe. AKA De Debbil.

>202 karenmarie: Thanks, Horrible, it was a mixed bag but it got better. I had a long talk with Jeremy and he made me feel a lot better.

>203 mckait: For me, Monday is usually Liberation Day, so yeah...but I'm way different from most anyway.

>204 msf59: Hi Mark! So far the wicked heat hasn't made an appearance here. The forecast doesn't include it, to my quiet joy. Sorry it's troubling you, though.

>205 maggie1944: My morning refrain, Karen44. It is the Divine Elixir.

>207 maggie1944: Assoluement, ma amie!

>208 jnwelch: Yep. Them's my plans.

>210 ronincats: No. I'm just less pissed by it.

>211 mirrordrum: Thanks, Ellie, I got a surprising and very welcome amount of cosseting in my chat with the Youff Jeremy. What a man he's growing into.

>212 Crazymamie: OMGOMGOMGOMGZOMG

*extremely shocking gobbling of pancakes*

Oh dear, did I get syrup in your eye, so sorry, here's a tissue....

>213 mckait: Thanks, me lurve! *smooch*

Hi lovey - glad you are feeling a bit happier. Fingers crossed the rest of the week is better.

Hi Bekka! Thanks for the good wishes. *smooch*

NOBODY SAY APPLE TO ME UNLESS YOU MEAN THIS:



Smuggington McSmugness buyers of these tax-evading patent-infringing corpocratic bastards' stuff are duly warned.

Stopping by to say Hello Dearest Richard. I have been crazy busy lately. I see things are going well with you. Hop eit stays that way. Hugs and smooches to you and Stella :) Love all the chit chat. :)

>224 MonicaLynn: Hi Monica! Stella sends slurps.

Not a fan of Steve Jobs I take it, RD? ;)

***smooch*** (fully sprayed with antibacterial stuff so you don't pick up this nasty infection I have)

Hello rd.. I am about to have an apple for dessert and put my macbook aside to open a book... and keep up on fb with iPad.

How are ya ?

>226 TinaV95: *smoochings* for dear, ill Mrs. Lisa! So happy to see you. Always a pleasure.

>227 mckait:

Fingers crossed for a good Powerball Hump Day for you tomorrow, Richard. i hope I remember to buy a ticket tomorrow morning .... chances are, I'll forget.

Hello Richard my dear. Can we stay friends if I tell you that I have always preferred Miracle Whip to mayo? *ducks as she runs out of the room*

>229 cameling: Thanks! I'll win for us all. *smooch*

>230 Cobscook: ...I'm sorry, and you are...? I once knew someone called "Heidi" but *she* wouldn't have eaten that spoodge any more than she would own an A**le product.

RIGHT?

*sigh* the things one learns about one's friends.

Good luck on the Powerball drawing tomorrow!

Oh how I hope...

Add "...read good books," and I'm set.

How cool! Now I want one.

>234 richardderus:. Um. Yes.

Hard to argue with that, eh what?

>182 richardderus: Oh. My. Lord.
Miracle Whip sounds like a disgusting conglomeration of all things useless and nutritionally devoid. *retch*

Powerball mojo coming your way. (I take it that is some sort of lottery thingy?)

Eta: I think I spelled retch as wretch.....now I dont even know which one is right!

Happy powerball to you! It's today, right?

Are you getting ready to feel older?

OK, I'll hope you win the powerball right after it is clear I have not won it, my own self.

>239 LovingLit: Retch is the only appropriate response to Miracle Whip. Being forced to eat it makes on a wretch. Thanks for the Powerball mojo!

>240 mckait: I feel as old as I care to feel ever in life, thanks. It's blazing hot today, but only today, as the bubble bursts around 11p. Poor Stella is scratching like MAD, despite flea treatment and a bath...no sign of a rash...so it's most likely heat. Cross anything that still crosses for me, because all of us would benefit.

>241 maggie1944: Thanks, Karen44, right back at'cha, with a big *smooch*

Mojo being sent for your weather to cool down soon and for luck on the powerball. *smooch*

Reminding myself.

>243 calm: Thanks on both counts, calm! I haven't been to visit lately, are you feeling a bit more the thing these days? I hope your ramble through means that you are!

>244 richardderus: good one while waiting for Power Ball winnings.

Heh, it's blinkin' hot here...like everywhere else in the US, it seems...so I'm reminding myself not to get too downhearted.

Well, I'm not sure thinking about all the others who suffers really makes personal suffering all that smaller?

Read a book? Get lost in some story. Can you soak in a tepid tub of water. It is my favorite go to solution when I am finally done with being hot, hot, hot.

I'm going to go paint the front porch and then I'll just lay myself down and die.

This crap is the reason I don't read the man's tedious, overwrought books. What the fuck is this sentence supposed to mean? Cue his partisans: "you're too shallow/unintelligent/unhip to Get It." No, I got it: He's a pretentious boring poseur in love with the sound of his keyboard going clicky-clack.

Hi Richard - I follow (lurk on I guess) your thread and love your comment about Franzen. I completely agree about his pretentiousness and don't have any intention of reading another word he's written!

Why thank you, Vivian, and don't be a stranger. Any antifranzenite is a friend of mine.

>249 richardderus: Don't hold back - what do you really think?

You've encouraged me to continue not to read Mr. Franzen.

I'm not a fan. I had a few collywobbles about sugar-coating my disdain.

Thank you my dear. I can now continue to ignore this pompous piece of drivel. So...other than that, I guess you don't feel strongly.

Moi? The soul of sweet reason, feel strongly? Why the mere notion! I strive for the measured response at all times.

In this case, the measure I used was the megaton.

The owner of this thread, if memory serves correctly, proclaimed the arrival of fall earlier this month.

It's 92˚ degrees in Philadelphia at the moment, with a heat index of 99˚. Fall, my a**.

We have had a high of 66 degrees and rain, definitely starting to feel a bit autumnal.

Or so I hope.

>256 kidzdoc: Darryl, don't be disingenuous. You've heard of "Indian Summer." Well, here 'tis!

>257 johnsimpson: My flight arrives at...

>256 kidzdoc: The temperature will plummet in the Northeast after the cold front passes through today and tomorrow. By Saturday the high temperature will be in the low 70s in NYC and Philadelphia.

>257 johnsimpson: I thought that Indian summer was the warm weather that followed the first frost of the year.

I KNOW!!!!!!!!!!!!! I CANNOT WAIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

While you, poor mutt, are on your way back to Hotlanta, where summer will end in December and begin again in January.

Yep. I fly back to ATL on Saturday, and it will stay in the low to mid 80s for the coming week. Bleh.

...and the week after...and the week after that...and the week after that...*cackles in evil gleeful smugness*

>262 richardderus: Hmph. I was going to offer you some of the cannolis that I bought from Termini Bros. Bakery in Philadelphia's Reading Terminal Market this afternoon, but you can just forget it now.

*happy sigh* I do believe I have neglected to mention a small detail...Sweetienubbins sent me a thoughtful birthday surprise! The local bakery dropped a lovely smallish carrot cake here yesterday! My instructions are to eat it before I would have to share it.

This kid's gonna make some lucky youngster a damn fine husband.

The cannolis look swell, too!

cannolis! yum!

Cake...Also yum!

crossing crossables.

Thank you, sweetness. I would *so* love to start the Tome Home on its journey to reality.

The cake is YUM. Why is this boy closer in age to my oldest grandchild than to my daughter? Life is not fair.

Like that's news. *smooch*

It was in the 60s and foggy today in Eastport, Me where I work but the rest of Maine was plenty hot I hear....sometimes that fog is a fine, fine thing!

Hi RD- How are you? Surviving the miserable heat? My advice: Stay indoors and READ! Not a Franzen fan, huh? I have only read the Corrections but I thought it was pretty damn good but since I like nearly everything, it doesn't really matter, does it?

>267 Cobscook: The only reason my voodoo dolly is staying under the bed right now is that the heat's already dissipating. It was a lousy day, but just the one.

>268 msf59: No, Franzen and Foster Wallace and Eugenides and Safran Foer and them ain't on my buy list. But I am always left a little awe-struck at the way you have such good things to say about stuff. It's endearing.

I am among the living. Overworked, but alive.
I love "sanity is really just one book away."

Hot here in Seattle, too. Got all the way up to 90F today. We don't do 90F well.

*smooches* for you (and of course for the TSFMF Stella)

249... Snort!!! I don't know this Franzen but the quote does sound a bit pompous. I shall steer clear with you.

NINETY! In Seattle! Wheee dawggie that must've caused some consternation. Stella and I are pleased that you're alive. I mentioned to her that Abby the cat's kittymama sent greetings.

Richard, is it not the middle of the night where you are?

Abby is loooong kitty in these temps.

#249, 271 - I really am glad I'm not the only one who doesn't quite get the charm of such works as Freedom by Jonathan Franzen. I liked the "maybe we should stop making babies if we want to save the Earth" angle of that novel but otherwise I missed its appeal.

It's 0108, yeah. Knee's bothering me, can't find a sleep position.

He's not untalented, more's the pity, so can't simply be dismissed. He's merely overfond of his own Franzenosity. Like the rest of that cohort of MFA writers. It's the reason I call them "pit-sniffers." They're always checking themselves out, posing, preening, showing it off.

It gets tedious when it gets in the way of the story.

This list could very easily represent purchases I've made with one-click Satan. Then again, I could merely be musing aloud about things I want to read. Or I could just be posting them in the dead of night when no one's looking because I want to appear honest and above-board.

THE WHITE WORKING CLASS TODAY
CHRISTIAN NATION: A NOVEL
THE MOON HOAX
DINOCALYPSE NOW
ONE DAY THE WIND CHANGED
WIFE TO THE BASTARD
FULL FRONTAL: to make a long story short

#269 But I am always left a little awe-struck at the way you have such good things to say about {the} stuff. It's endearing.

Can that apply to Miracle Whip lovers too?

(I'll probably have to duck and run, eh?)

*smooches* and I hope you have a frabjous Thursday.

Horrible

Morning RD- That's one thing I have avoided so far, are the Kindle books. Yes, I have 2 or 3 saved on my iPad but have yet to read one on there. The mountains of print books keep me hopping as it is.
BTW- I was lucky enough to snag the audio of Tilt-a-Whirl, which I remember you really liking. I can't believe there are 8 books in this series, out all-ready. Have you read any of the others?

#263 So that's what cannolis look like! One of those things that you read/hear and never quite get round to google imaging :)

Snuggles and hopings that your day is going a darn sight better than mine :/

>277 karenmarie: *smoochiesmoochsmooch* Pretty fucking shitty so far. It might make it up to sucking wookie balls if things improve.

>278 msf59: I'm not past #1 in the series yet, Mark, but I think I'll go on with it. I hope the audio is a good one.

>279 BekkaJo: Hi Bekka! Cannolis are so delicious that I assumed they were known the world over, you mean there are NO ITALIAN BAKERIES in Jersey?! Does the UNHCR know about this?

I can't say my day won't get worse. It could, but it would have to go some. Saturday is my actual birthday, though the book group is coming on the 21st for a combination meeting and celebration.

So what does Claudia do? She invites a friend of hers, a woman who has been pretty damned rude to me more than once here in the place where I live (can't call it my home), because they have work to do. This woman wants a particular meal, so she will have it, despite the fact that I heartily dislike chicken and that is the featured dish.

Happy fucking birthday to me. Can't drive anymore, hands won't grip and I can't fold myself into the Toyota anyway, so here I sit.

I'm a big, grown-up boy, I don't expect fuss and bother...in fact I don't like fuss and bother...and I'm not juvenile enough to insist that only people *I* like be in the house, especially when work needs to be done. But what a fuck of a lousy way to spend my birthday, under house arrest in my bedroom so I don't have to make my day *worse* by interacting with someone whose behavior towards me hasn't been to my liking.

I'm sure I'll adore the tasty chicken dinner. Sure of it. Yep, I will.

Speechless I am

How mean

Can you order out some nice Italian food and eat in your bedroom, claiming illness?

Oh, that just sucks Richard. :(

Who is this Claudia and why did she do this to you????

What Tina asked!!

Big hugs, Richard.

#280 Oh babes. That is just plain shite. Take Stella and find the nearest pub and sit in with a good book. Okay, that may not pan out in your neck of the woods :/

Just sending you love and strength to get through it all. And an early birthday since I tend to suck at getting it on the right day. XXX

>281 maggie1944: Mean? Maybe, more likely simply thoughtless and inconsiderate. I'm not at my best eating in bed, never found it comfortable, so I'll do the usual thing and have something while standing at the kitchen counter. It's easiest for me, since it's tall enough and I don't have to endure the pain of sitting down.

>282 TinaV95: I live in Claudia's parents' house in Hempstead. She inherited it when they died. Claudia and I were business partners in the 1990s, before I went back to Texas to watch my mother die. I came back to NY because 1) Texas is too effin' hot and b) Claudia's elderly aunt was living here alone, and that wasn't a tenable situation. So I moved in and took care of the old one during her descent into and death from dementia. It was GRUELING.

>283 wilkiec: *smooch* for Diana, thanks.

>284 BekkaJo: Ha, no not a plan, Bekka...it's sitting that presents me with problems due to knee issues. I just can't take the pain, I can't get up once down, it's just not a fun thing. I need new knees. Of course, for that one needs healthcare, and this is MURRIKA where we'd rather bomb places we shouldn't even know where they are than to help disabled people. Because that's socialism.

Thunderstorm! Yay, at last! It will, I hope wash away the mugginess and leave the coolth behind.

I love you.

I'm with the ordering take-out of your choice and eating in your room with Stella.

I'll send a very large pitcher of g and t.

xxoo

Ok, then, eat at the counter, and try to enjoy it; then, move as quickly as comfortable to the best place to dive into your very best book, to read, of course. Know that I'm sending you some special mojo which makes ignoring those others, and focusing on something totally engaging in the reading. BTW, Autumnal weather really is wonderful, isn't it. I love it. Yea for Autumn.

>287 Matke: Awww, thanks Danvers, you're my pal and I love you right back...but no, room-eating isn't pleasant or practical. I've never understood the desire to eat in bed, beyond potato chips or whipped cream or the like.

>288 maggie1944: Perfect solution, thanks Karen44...heavy on the mojo, okay?

I'm all over the G&T!

Eat your take-out at the counter.

"Why, actually I developed an allergy to chicken some little time ago: I get the heebie-jeebies every time I eat it. Of course I enjoyed preparing it for all of you. I'm just being sinfully self-indulgent since it's my natal anniversary. No, no, go ahead; please don't worry about it."

Then eat (make sure to include a single dessert serving); then retreat to your pitcher and the best book you have on hand.

Seems like a plan to me.

HA! There's a passive-aggressive plan for ya! No, I won't be cooking for them, though I do plan to make a pineapple upside down cake. Last time I made one, it was a disaster, and I am determined to figure out why. Plus I love them, so I want one.

Oh dear. I was so far behind here. Adore post 249! I thought it was just me - so happy to know that there are other antifranzenites! *does happy dance*

And boo to the birthday boor - you should not have to suffer through that on YOUR day. Eat at the counter, and then fart loudly.

See above.

>292 Crazymamie:, 293 HA! Oh my, that would go over like...a fart in church! Hahaha.

The main problem I'll have is avoiding contact while executing these evil plots. *smooch* for my inspirations!

Boo on your birthday being taken over by someone you don't enjoy....that sucks! You are never to old to expect to have it your way on your birthday.

And LOL at #277!

My personal belief is is that a birthday should be celebrated not for just one day but over the course of a week. You should indulge yourself in some wonderful dessert/book/movie/ what-have-you for each day of your birthday week. So even if your actual day is a suck-fest of rudeness and dry tasteless chicken, you have plenty of other things to look forward to.

You have my permission.
Make it so.
;)

Patriots 10, Jets 0 midway through the first quarter. I think it's time for the J-E-T-S Jets Jets Jets to invoke the mercy rule.

ETA: I may have spoken too soon; the Jets are inside the Patriots' 20 yard line. As long as they don't run the butt fumble play they may actually score.



That never gets old...

I'm wandering around the threads, had a kind of difficult day, yours is always so entertaining! I can COUNT on it, and that is great!

Hmmm.....I see we're waiting for the magic #300 before adding another thread??

>295 Cobscook: After last night's very pleasant surprise, I'm in a much better mood about the world, and so about this too. You know, Heidi, being treated inconsiderately is a gift, in a way. It is the true and accurate measure of the other person's character and their regard for you, pared of camouflage.

>296 avidmom: Birthday weeks are fine! The book circle will meet here on the 21st to discuss a book I love, I, Claudius, and that will cap the week off nicely. Plus I'll have my delicious, doted-upon napoleon cake that day. OOOOOO

>297 kidzdoc: Patriots 13, Jets 10...not too shabby...

>298 sibylline: Heya cuz! Yeah, boring isn't usual around these parts. Sending hugs northeastward. Have a better Friday than Thursday was.

>299 tututhefirst: Yep. Thread's up now, though, and the new topper is something special.