Comfort & Joy

What to say about this book.

This book doesn't feel like a romance novel in the traditional sense. We start with the relationship already established. What our journey here is is seeing how these men have grown and changed during their relationship up to the present. We especially focus on Ford's change and growth.

I spent a good portion of my reading feeling like these two just absolutely SHOULD NOT be together. These men came from two entirely different backgrounds, with two entirely different types of parents, in two different socioeconomic classes. Even as adults, they continue to live and navigate their lives entirely differently. Ford comes from a background of wealth, an old-money type family from Savannah that was (mostly) show more functional; Dan grew up poor, with an abusive father and mostly dysfunctional family during his childhood. There's also notable moments where it just feels like they hate each other.

I find Ford to be absolutely insufferable most of the time. This is definitely because I come from a background similar to Dan's, and I cannot IMAGINE dating someone like Ford. This definitely contributes to my feeling of "these two don't belong together," but I warmed up a bit to Ford by the end of the book and I was hopeful for the future of these two. show less

3 3/4 stars

Now this is a romance well worth reading. It took a bit to get into the style of the author, but once I did, the story flowed wonderfully and I began to get into Ford and Dan as a couple.

I think a quote from the book will sum up my thoughts on this book

Yet, they slept peacefully, side by side, and the body of one became adjusted to the rhythm of the other, and the breathing of one slowed the breathing of the other, and they dream in tandem and shared fragments of each other's dreams, and they grew more like each other day by day, not in personality but in the fissures of the brain, because, seeing the same things every day, day after day, they laid down crevices in themselves that were the same shape, that were the same

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events written into memory, and this was enough ... (pg.s 207-208)

It's a slow romance, full of doubts and discomfort on both sides. Ford isn't sure of his footing in this new world, does not even like to have the word "gay" used to describe him, yet, he knows deep down that he's the happiest he's ever been with Dan. In the face of his parents' doubts and anger at his going against the family tradition of marrying when told to, he finds he has to center himself and work his way to a point that he can face them and say "this is my life".

Dan, too, has his problems. He's a hemophiliac and it HIV positive, a combination which, at first, causes Ford some qualms. A childhood of poverty and hardship has left Dan with hard ideas about how much money he spends and he's fiercely independent. Yet, when the time comes, Ford proves to be just what Dan needs, to be able to help him with his illness and take care of him when Dan is too impaired to deal with things on his own.

Lovely romance.

Theme song for this book: More Than Words by Extreme. show less

This is not a mystery but a wonderful little book of real people and real families. A successful pediatric surgeon and his lover discover each other and their ties to their very different, but very similar families. It's a marvelous afternoon read and I guarantee you that you will rediscover members of your own family in the character set. This is a wonderful treat of a story.

This is a MM romance that is also literature and not just indulgence. Grimsley is an amazing writer. This book is more emotional and loving than any other of his that I've read, but the harsh moments are here too. An engrossing journey through the life-changes of a gay physician as he comes to grips with who he is and what he wants in his life.

This is one of my favorite books of all time. I've read it 5-6 times and find something interesting about the characters with each reading. Two very different individuals learn to love one another.....and to deal with their families. I highly recommend.

Ford is the classical good boy of a wealthy southern family. Third generation doctor, he has always followed the steps his parents have setted for him. But when he is expected to marry a good girl from a wealthy southern family he begins to question some of that steps. Cause almost by accident, he discovers that he is more attracted from men than women.

Told be truth, till almost his late twenties years, he pleases himself with the adoration from other men. Ford is an handsome man, wealthy, a doctor, and he is used to be spoilt first by his family and then by his friends and lovers.

First time he sees Dan, he is impressed by the angel voice of the man singing a Christmas carol. But Dan is a shy man and probably in that moment Ford is not show more ready for love, and so neither of them make a move. An year after they have the change to meet again and this time Ford finally makes that move. But as always Ford takes the lead and dictats how their relationship should be. Dan, even if shy and average plain jane, is not willing to loose himself in Ford's aurea.

The relationship between them is not simple: even if Ford, step by step, tries to find his way out of the closet, he never claims that Dan is his lover, he uses direct words like 'he sleeps with me', but he never one calls him other than my friend. On the other hand Dan comes from a very poor family and he is very stubborn in searching to prove his independence: accept to live with Dan and risk to cancel all his independence's claims is a very hard step. Plus Dan has a critical illness that put at risk their life together: from one part Dan tries to hide the problems his illness affects him, cause it's one more thing that puts him on an inferiority level from Ford, on the other hand Ford, even if conscious and caring of Dan's illness, sometime regrets the boundaries that cause them.

The story travel in two time levels: the main story tell us the journey of Dan and Ford to spend Christmas with Dan's family, and between loving and conformtable family's pictures, we read how Dan and Ford's meet, of all the problems they have to overcome to be together, how always love is never put in question, but that they will succeed. The two time levels converge in one common ending, that could be an happily ever after, and could be not: not all the open issues in their relationship are straightened...

http://www.amazon.com/dp/1565123964/?tag=elimyrevandra-20 show less