Bee Lavender

This anthology is, like so many anthologies, a mixed bag.

It's great to hear a range of voices, including those of young parents, which are often left out of parenting conversations. (I mean, our culture loves to talk about 'teen moms,' but not so much with them.) This collection is intended as a counterpoint to mainstream 'mom' memoirs, and it works pretty well in that capacity.

Some of the essays are just poorly-written and/or boring, though, and could have used more assertive editing. And show more some of the voices feel stilted and annoying to me--which probably is to say, I just flat-out disliked some of the narrators, who sounded like they thought they were extremely cool (perhaps a veneer over defensiveness?). On the other hand, some of the selections are beautiful, thoughtful, thought-provoking, funny, incisive.

A friendly warning: over halfway through a fairly cheerful book, there's a stretch of maybe five extremely depressing and triggery essays, which I happened to read while trying to get to sleep through insomnia born of a family tragedy. Didn't work super-well. There are enough emotionally intense bits to make me suggest not reading this book during a vulnerable period, like say the postpartum period. show less

Being pregnant is hard. If you're like me, you worry about everything--money, the food you're eating, environmental toxins, household toxins, eating cold cuts and soft cheese, cleaning the toilet with bleach, dying your hair,etc. etc. It's exhausting! But it's also important to remember that there are good, magical things about being pregnant and the reward in the end for all your worrying is worth it! Reading pregnancy and childbirth books all the time can be an unpleasant experience that show more does little more than remind you of all the things you should add to your long list of worries.
I've been looking for a memoir or novel or anything about pregnancy that approaches the subject from a more personal perspective--something that lays out the fears and joys and experience of being pregnant without being didactic or technical. Breeder featured a collection of essays about women in various situations in their life who found themselves pregnant either by accident or on purpose and how they dealt with it. I really enjoyed it. It made me laugh and commiserate and it didn't portray pregnant women as out of control freaks who care only about their cravings and their Kegel exercises. I also appreciated the portrayal of men as sympathetic life partners and not beer swigging automatons or weak slaves to their wives' every whim.
The book rang true and for that I am grateful. show less

It isn't so much that I necessarily disliked the stories in the book, but rather that I didn't see how they are representative of a "new generation of mothers." I think I'm supposed to be part of the demographic at which this collection is aimed, but all it did was make me feel as though I wasn't exciting enough to be part of this "new generation" -- I was 23 when I had my son, but I did so in Chicago and not while or after backpacking through Europe or running away from home. And I've got show more punk sensibilities and alternative tastes, but this book still didn't sit right with me. Then again, no parenting book I've ever read has done so (with the notable exception of [author: Anne Lamott]'s [book: Operating Instructions]). So maybe it's an issue I have the genre and not the book... but even so, I have to say this alternative take on the "new generation" wasn't much more relevant to my life as a parent than the old standards from the "old generation" of mothers. show less

Wow. This book was a whirlwind. I couldn't put it down and I can't believe this woman is still alive. Being curious by nature I scoured the internet looking for pictures of Bee Lavender. I really wanted to know what she looked like. It is hard to find any pictures of her. (She does state in the book she doesn't like her photography taken.) It's horrible what she has been through at such a young age, yet the book ends on a hopeful note. She is going to live her life to the fullest while she show more can. That is amazing. I think she is a true hero in her own sense. She is also an amazing writer. She has a very strong voice and lays things out just as they happened. She doesn't try to get the reader to feel sorry or have sympathy for her. show less