Before I Fall

I kept putting off reading this because, even though it's obviously different from the summary, I had it in my mind that it would be a lot like Gayle Forman's If I Stay. And this isn't to say that I didn't love If I Stay, because I did, but I didn't feel the need to read another version of it.

As it turned out, Before I Fall was very different. To start off, Sam Kingston is nothing like the majority of female protagonists in YA literature. She's shallow, bitchy, self-centered and every other adjective you would use to describe the Mean Girl in high school. Her friends are more of the same, using the high school hierarchy to their advantage, taunting one girl, Juliet Sykes, in particular. Needless to say, it was a surprise to have so much show more disdain for the main character right away and I was curious to see her personal growth through the story.

After a party and drunk driving, Sam dies and begins reliving the day, February 12. As frustrating as it could be, it was great that she didn't change overnight. Her first attempts of doing the day over only further demonstrate how selfish she can be. However, as the days continue on, she becomes more self-aware; she realizes how awful she and her friends can be; she sees how judgmental she is and how wrong she is about others. What is particularly wonderful to me is that she accepts a lot of the things she dislikes about her friends, she sees their negative and manipulative sides, and yet...she loves them completely. I half-expected her to turn her back on them, Lindsay in particular, so it was a pleasant surprise to see how much she cared about them, flaws and all.

As the story came to its conclusion, I was blown away by the character growth. Sam kept her edges, but Oliver managed to give her so much more depth. Without spoiling anything, I loved the ending and anything else would've cheapened the story for me. It was ambiguous enough for it to take a few rereads for it to hit me, and even then, it's possible it was just my interpretation of it. Regardless, it was a great read and, now, days later after having finished the book, I keep thinking back to it. A definite highlight of this year and highly recommended -- go out and get it! show less

I’ve dipped my toe into Young Adult books before and haven’t always been satisfied. Either the plotting felt too contrived or the emotions didn’t relate to me (being a very very old woman in my 40s). But when a blogger you respect gushes about a Young Adult book, you think “Well, I have to give it a try.”

So, after Jill from Rhapsody in Books went nutso about Before I Fall, I dutifully requested it from the library. But before I tell you what I thought of the book, let me tell you what the book is about.

The Basic Story

Samantha (Sam) Kingston is one of the four most popular girls at Thomas Jefferson High in affluent Ridgeview, Connecticut. As seniors, she and her friends Lindsay (the Queen Bee), Elody (the Cheerful Drunk), and show more Ally (Rich but Dumb) are at the top of the social food chain. And in the dog-eat-dog world of high school, being at the top of the food chain is everything.

The day our story begins is February 12—also known as Cupid Day. It is the day when popularity is demonstrated for everyone to see in the form of roses, which are delivered throughout the day. (A side note: Can you really imagine a high school that would let this type of thing take place? Am I naive? It seemed like such an invitation to pain and heartbreak.) Aside from Cupid Day, the day is also a big one for Sam because she’s decided to lose her virginity to her boyfriend Rob that night.

As the day goes along, we see Sam’s day unfold—her flirtation with her math teacher, her teasing of Juliet Sykes (the school “psycho”), her casual dismissal of a childhood friend who is having a party later that night, her pre-party drinking with her friends. That night, Sam finds herself at the big party—nervous and anxious about having sex for the first time. But things don’t quite go as expected, and Sam finds herself leaving the party with the girls instead. However as they careen down the rain-soaked roads, something happens and the car barrels off the side of the road and then…

… Sam wakes up, in her bed, on February 12. Cupid Day. The day she just lived … and seemed to have died on. In what becomes a teen version of Groundhog Day, Sam relives February 12th over and over for an entire week— making changes in a frantic attempt to alter the outcome of her story. But as February 12 replays again and again, Sam begins to see her life, her friends, and the people around her differently. Can she make the changes she needs to save herself ?

My Thoughts

I really liked the book. I stayed up way later than I should have reading it, but I have so many thoughts spinning around so bear with me while I ramble.

First off, the writing feels very natural for a teenage narrator. It was easy to get into Sam’s world because Lauren Oliver makes it come alive. Even though I felt that I probably would have disliked a girl like Sam if I went to school with her, Oliver gives her enough uncertainty and awareness about herself that she is a sympathetic character—becoming even more so as the “scales fall from her eyes” and she begins to see the truth and complexity of the people around her.

Unlike so many Young Adult books, this one actually did take me back to those awful teenage years. I wasn’t a girl like Sam by a long shot (I would have dreaded an event like Cupid Day), but I do believe that every high school has the same basic social structure. I remember the Sams and Lindsays of my own high school, as well as the feeling of being on the periphery of things. There is such a need to feel like you fit in and are popular—even when the cost of doing so is do things you don’t feel good about inside.

Yet Sam is relatable because she wasn’t always one of the popular girls. She tells of being plucked from social obscurity by Lindsay for reasons she still isn’t clear about. The dynamic between Sam and Lindsay is one of the most interesting in the book, and I found myself feeling conflicted about how I felt about Lindsay. Oliver did a wonderful job of shedding light on her character … of showing you how the monster that we see in the book evolved and how, deep down, she is really a hurt little girl inside. Yet it is hard to accept the casual cruelty that Linsday, Sam, Elody and Ally dish out to all those around them.

One aspect of the book that gave me pause was when Sam starts having doubts about her boyfriend Rob and begins seeing an old childhood friend in a new light. It made me wonder if my own Little One would some day freeze out a child he plays with so happily today—forgetting all the happy moments they shared when they were little and kid society was kinder and more forgiving. It made me wonder how all these little kids that happily dig holes in our back yard together will be behaving in a few short years.

Another thing that kind of freaked me out was realizing how much “bad” stuff teenagers do. From the drinking to the smoking to the sex, I realized I’m not ready to send my Little One out into this world now … or ever. The grown-up me is so horrified by the behavior in this book that I feel about 1,000 years old. I imagine that reading this book with a tween or teenage could open up a floodgate of topics for discussion.

Well, I’m losing my way here and starting to wander down memory lane but this is the kind of book this is; it puts you right there, smack dab, in the mind of a teenager … and what a confusing, angsty place that can be. It was fascinating to follow Sam on her journey and I, for one, was rooting for her to find a way out of her nightmare. The way Lauren Oliver guides Sam through it was so well done and the ending so fitting and right that I felt like standing up and clapping when I finished the book.

My Final Recommendation

With a gripping premise that lives up to its promise, Before I Fall is one of the few Young Adult books that I thought got it right. If you’re an older reader, this book will take you back to your own teenage years and you’ll find yourself hoping and praying that Sam figures things out. If you are a young adult (or have one in your life), my guess is you will find a lot of food for thought as Sam struggles to make sense of her world. It isn’t a journey you’ll soon forget. Make time for this one! show less

I know what you’re thinking. “You hadn’t read Before I Fall until just now!?” I live under a rock, okay? But I’m REALLY glad I finally broke down and read it. Because it was FLIPPING FANTASTIC!

Before I Fall isn’t just about catty girls and kegger parties (although it has plenty of each!). It’s about the amazing changes the main character Sam goes through as she discovers what she missed in her life. Sam’s character was just so wonderful. I loved reading about her change from vapid party girl to a kind and thoughtful old-soul. Her realizations and messages from the “beyond” were so insightful and touching. I’d totally befriend Sam in real life. She’s got crazy confidence, but she’s also really kind.

Each time show more Sam’s last day is repeated, Lauren Oliver expertly reveals more and more of the story. Minute changes in Sam’s decisions throughout the days unveil more clues as to what needs to happen to break the cycle. Each day is more heart-wrenching than the next, and I’m certain that if I was in Sam’s situation, I’d go crazy.

The romance towards the end of the novel was amazing, too. Though it’s only for a chapter or two, you can feel the romance building up way before things actually happen. And when things happen… it’s just too sweet! My heart swelled when Sam finally kissed him (trying to be spoiler-free!).

Before I Fall is SUCH a touching book. It’s fun, it’s crazy, and it’ll leave you with a sweet warm feeling in your chest. If you’re like me, and live under a rock, you should read Before I Fall ASAP. You’ll be glad you did.
(Originally published at 365 Days of Reading) show less

I much enjoyed this bittersweet novel. Samantha recounts in first person her evolving repetition of the last day of her life, lived until she gets it "right." This is not apparent to her from the beginning, and we do not see her recognize that she must get things right in order to move on and then operate solely on that motivation. It is a bit of "It's A Wonderful Life" and "A Christmas Carol" but with a different twist and characters. I feel it avoided the predictability of a protagonist realizing what a jerk she was, how her friends were just mean jerks and then doing a 180 to become enlightened. Instead, our protagonist realizes how normal everyday things are the stuff of life and that though she and her friends are bitchy and often show more cruel, there are many layers to her friends, most notably discovered about Sam and nice, "lame" Kent. We see her grow angry with bitch-queen Sam when she realizes just how cruel she can be and then we see her realize how much she does love her flawed friend as she learns more about her, accepting all of her, good and bad.

I found the writing excellently captured the dialogue, speech, mannerisms, concerns, cruelty and angst of teens in high school. I remember people from my own high school like each of the characters--without them feeling like stock characters. Oliver's next book is on my wishlist and I very much look forward to it. Bravo Ms. Oliver on your debut novel! show less

Sam Kingston is one of the popular girls, best friends with Lindsay, Ally, and Elody, and girlfriend of Rob, with whom she's planning to lose her virginity - tonight. But after a party, they get in a car accident and Sam is instantly killed... only to go back and re-live her last day. On each repeat, Sam does things slightly differently and eventually learns that there was a lot more to that night than she thought, relationships and causes and effects that she hadn't been aware of.

Hmmm. Sam was so unlikeable for the first half of the book that I considered not finishing, and only persisted because a couple of friends whose reading matches mine rated it highly. Sam does grow over the course of the book, but I had a hard time feeling show more sorry for the mean popular girls who bully others. There's also disordered eating, suicide attempts, the girls use "lesbian" as an insult, and the math teacher is a creep. Normal high school in 2010? Yeah maybe, and only worse now that we have smart phones. This is the high school drama I don't need to relive again. The second half of the book was better for me than the first as Sam starts to see the consequences of her actions and become a better person. Oliver takes what could be a tired trope and manages to do something interesting with it without getting repetitive. show less

As I began this book I could not stand Samantha Kingston. She is everything that I avoided in high school. At first I was so irritated by her, but then I began to realize that was the whole point. As a reader you witness Sam transform. She begins to learn life lessons that most grown adults never figure out. As she relives the same day over and over again, she is able to see that each of her actions causes a whole domino effect. She begins to approach each repeated day like a puzzle, trying to figure out what action needs to take place to get the reaction she seeks.
I did not like the way the book ended. I needed more closure, after spending seven days with Sam. However, I did really like the book as a whole. It does make you think show more about how you treat others, and what that can cause.
I would recommend this book to anyone who wants an easy read that is also thought provoking. show less

Samantha Kingston lives a charmed life. She is one of the most popular girls in her high school, she has a great boyfriend, a future full of promise. Until February 12, which is an entirely normal day. Normal that is until Sam dies. Now she relives her last day over again for seven days, unraveling the events that led up to her death and learning what really makes life worth living.

The premise of this novel was what pulled me in initially. Any sort of variation on time travel and I'm immediately intrigued. This novel fully lived up to its potential, although I spent probably almost half of the book strongly disliking Sam. She is entitled, snobbish, and has a general disregard for others at the beginning of the novel that make her show more entirely unsympathetic. However, she realistically grows over the course of the novel and becomes much more likable. Oliver weaves a fascinating narrative exploring the issue of how our choices have a ripple effect we don't always recognize and the importance of relationships in our lives. She also follows a realistic arc for Sam that subtly incorporates the five stages of grief into her loop of living the same day over again. An intriguing exploration of life, death, and the choices we make. show less