Ape (Prequel #1)

Ok fine, here, I created a thread. But on Jan 1st I will create new thread regardless of what post I'm on and none of these prequel threads will be linked to in my actual opening posts.

I cave quicker'n Richard I guess.

Yep. Sure do. More like the Swiss Navy than me.

I am keeping my eye on you. I am heading for Ohio in a couple of weeks.

Cool! Welcome back!

I still like odd numbers.

Hi Stephen, I'm with you and posting my real thread on January 1st. Of course, by then, you'll have a gazillion posts on your prequel thread. Ah, to be young and popular again. *Big Sigh*

Hola Stephano! Gotcha starred, boy! Maybe this year will be the year that the hordes will finally descend on your cave in Ohio. Hmmm.....

Hello, Stephen. My, you gave in quickly :)

Hi Stephen, just passing through.

STEPHEN!!! See, I knew you couldn't resist for long. A snowflake-shaped star for you, since the white stuff's falling again here...

Cindy: Oh dear! *Digs a separate secret cave where he definitely can't be found*

Thanks Jim! Thanks for creating the group. :)

*Waves at Luxx*

Donna: You are right, that's why this is "Prequel #1." Hopefully it only makes it to "Prequel #2" but you never know...

Hi Laura! Let's hope not... :P

Hi Stasia...yes I know, I'm a caver. *Continues digging*

Hi Laura. Yes, it is probably best to pass through quickly when it comes to my thread. And you definitely don't want to pass out here. That, would be bad.

Hello Ellie! Yep, it's falling here too. Quite a bit, actually. I'd type more, but my fingertips hurt again. :P I think I win the award for biggest profile comment ever. ^_^

Ha! I wondered where you'd disappeared off to... Gawd, it's boring here today. One £8 sale and we've been here nearly four and a half hours. *yawn* It's making me really sleepy and I've had to move from seasonal reproduction in birds to some weird circus YA book I won as an ER book. Even that's not working! *yawns again and goes back to her soup before she visits her profile*

Don't be silly, Ellie, you have read plenty today...just not so much of your actual book. Still, I think you're justified. :)

Stephen, it is ok. You won't have to go into a cave. We will be in Columbus.

Columbus!? That's only like 30-40 minutes away! *Cowers in fear*

Really?

*finds a map and draws a 30-40 minute circle around Columbus*

Hey, the James Thurber home is there! You should visit if you can't find Stephen, Cindy!

If you hide in Old Man's Cave. I won't come looking for you. We plan to get cheap tickets for an OSU basketball game.

#16 I will have to look the Thurber home up. If not this trip maybe the next one.

Hullo, just stopping by to say I starred you!

#11: Let me know if you hit China. No one will think to look for you there :)

Terri: Eeek! *Digs a tunnel 41 miles away from Columbus*

Cindy: Oh! Old Man's Cave, I haven't been there since I was a kid. I live very close to it and we used to take field trips there in elementary school. :)

Hello Iliana! *Waves*

Stasia: But if I let you know I hit China then you'd know to look there...

Hi Lynda! *Waves again*

Cindy: Columbus, you say? I'm pretty close to there too, and I lived in Columbus for 7 years - give a shout if you'd like some recommendations for really good restaurants near campus.

Ape: Hmm, I wonder in which direction those 41 miles are...

Amber: Southeast! I live in Logan.

Since it's a heavily wooded hole in the ground, no one will ever find me!

...I hope.

#23: Neat! We got our border collie somewhere round those there parts, so I hear what you're saying - it's not exactly a heavily populated area, but very pretty.

huh....I tiptoe in, just in case you had flesh-eating zombies lounging here ... and .... ? A clean sparkly thread, Stefano?

Amber, Thanks for the offer my SO is originally from the Columbus area. We go back 2-3 times a year.
Stephen, the last time I was at Old Mans Cave, you were a little boy.

#21: Yeah, but I will not tell anybody!

Amber: Definitely, the countryside is beautiful here.

Caro: Hi! Sparkly and clean, yes...we'll see how long it lasts.

My 2010 thread, however, already has cross-dressing karaoke competitions and very dirty innuendo about placings. Oh dear oh dear...

Cindy: Haha, so you were there not too long ago then? :P

Stasia: Nope, you won't tell 'anybody,' you'll tell 'everybody!'

Moi? Never!

Morning Stephen- Just stopping by to say hi! Your Prequel is pretty popular! Can't wait to see the Main Event!

29: Not moi, YOU!

. . .

30: Hey Mark! People must be disappointed, there isn't a single zombie to liven the place up...errr, so to speak...

The cyborgs are glad to find a place where they can be the 'special' folks though ... the zombies tend to take up all the room.

You have a point Caro Sorry for neglecting you all, you poor crazy cyborgs. *Hugs*

Don't feel too welcome just yet though, this thread doesn't count. My real thread is still here. I'm sure, on Jan 1st, the Icky Things will cometh!

Stephen's Main Event, where Icky Things will cometh... Ohhhh, I've been around these threads too long! ;-)

Well, somebody had to drag the tone down. This squeaky-clean choirboy image ain't fooling anybody!

I said icky, not sticky! Ewww, Now that's just gross.

:P

You have taught me well, master... *bows deeply*

bows deeply

Nice try, but I'm not taking the bait! This thread is remaining perfectly pure and pristine and free of any naughtiness or dirty innuendo! Even if we all know it isn't true of me to behave as such. Like a pornstar in a schoolgirl uniform.

Eeek! I mean I mean uhhh...errr...

D'oh!

Haha, sorry folks... Well, everyone knows New Year's Resolutions to be a 'better person' only last five minutes anyway - in this case we've blown it two weeks early! :)

It's not fair though, I was incited!

*adjusts Santa hat to a cheekier angle and grins merrily*

*Blushes furiously and grumbles flusteredly with vague mentions of being utterly powerless here*

Stephen, watch out for the Cougars 8-)

Cougars are definitely the scariest creatures in the wild! *Shivers*

Better to say "Scariest Wild Creatures." Safer, too.

Lol I like this place :)

44: I'm terrified regardless of what you call them. *Hides behind Richard and hopes he shoos off the scary cougars* Please don't let them get me. They'll try to eat me! I'm too young to die. Wahhh!

45: I'm glad you like the place. Most people are put off by the zombie blood splattered all over the floor and all the nude 'artwork' on the walls (Ok ok, so I cut them out of magazines, that doesn't make them any less artistic! ...) Have a seat and stay awhile! Though I suggest you stay away from the fold out couch facing the wall of 'life-size' potraits...

Too late...

>46 Ape: - Oooh, did everyone else just feel this place jerking up another notch on the creepy scale? ;-)

47: Oh dear...someone call poison control!

48: What? I don't know what YOU were thinking, something perverse I'm sure, but that couch in front of the life-size nude portraits is the one I jerk off in...

...and sometimes when I jerk off the soda bottle cap I spill a little.

Geez, I don't know why you guys think such dirty thoughts all the time. You act like a provoke it or something! I just didn't want Kel_Light to sit in a sticky pool of root beer!

*Blushes at whatever embarrassing things Ellie might have been picturing*

;)

lol!

49: Oh yes, sweetie, I think I can see your "blushing" from here!

"I spilled my drink": the excuse every boy gives to his mother when she goes to wash the sheets where he's "jerked off the soda bottle cap"...

I'd just like to take a moment to thank the women of my family for passing on the 'filthy mind gene', and thus the ability to play Stephen at his own dirty little game... ;-)

My mom never let me take drinks to my bedroom, so I had to be more innovative. I think I blamed it on the dogs always eating their bones in my room or something. Hey, doesn't the 'bone' part make it a half-truth or something!? :P

Delurking long enough to say that this thread is giving me a serious case of the naughty giggles...

Amber: Naughty giggles are perfectly appropriate whilst discussion matters relating to naughty dribbles.

Kleenex never occurred to you? Or hey, here's a radical notion, do your own laundry? That was my solution.

Oh great idea Richard.

*Squeaky voice* "So mom, I'm hitting puberty and I was just wondering if I could, y'know...wash my own sheets..."

Oh yeah, that would have saved a TON of embarrassment. :P

Ahhh....and finally the true colors of Stefano's thread emerges once more. I knew you couldn't hold on to a clean smut-free thread for long ... why, we'd have thought you'd been captured by the fairies and a changeling left in your place.

OMG that image is now seared into my brain ew ew ew ew ew ew get it off me ew ew ew ew ew ew ew

I'll take zombies over that any time. All of a sudden I have a new perspective on Caroline...

OMG, Speechless, ROFL.

hey, i'm just keeping in the spirit of Stefano's thread.

but here's the antidote :

Caro: But I'm pretty certain it wasn't my fault again... *ahem* And I do NOT look like that. Although I am liable to be seen sitting in a similar chair...but his shoes are nicer than mine. :P

Richard: Meh, I don't think Gilbert Gottfried looks so bad for his age...

Terri/Cindy: I know, right? People blame me, but I think peoples' true colors show when they visit my thread. It's like getting drunk, except instead of a hangover you have permanent mental scarring. *shrug*

Caro: ...now THAT is horrifying...

>56 Ape: - I giggled so much it HURTS!

I'm glad my pubescent predicaments of the past amuse you, Ellie. They weren't so amusing at the time! :P

>61 cameling: Ahhh. Much, much nicer, Stephen's grousing aside. Actually, Stephen's grousing makes it that much nicer still....

Waahhh! :(

I'll slay it with my manly Dagger of Masculinity!



There, now no one and question my manhood!

*Takes closer look at dagger* Oh... ...errr... *ahem*

You are in trouble if that is your manly Dagger of Masculinity!

Yes, I know. :(

And it's a little on the small side too, isn't it? *WEEP*

>66 Ape: What the Devil *IS* that risible, puny thing?

Hey, don't knock the dagger! It might be puny but it isn't the size that matters. It's risibility makes up for it.

I'm pretending 'risible' means 'able to rise' of course...

You people are disgusting. I feel right at home.

71: I'm glad you feel right at home. But me, you see...well, I'm so innocent and perfectly pure that all these dirty comments make me feel awkward and uncomfortable ON MY OWN THREAD. Isn't that just terrible?

*Puts on the most innocent smile he can muster*

Are those crickets I hear chirping? Ok, so maybe that wasn't a very convincing argument...

Stephen, I always get a laugh when I visit your thread! Sometimes it's kind of a nervous chuckle, but most often, flat-out laughter. Thanks for that!

Karen O.

Hi Karen. It's always nice to know there are those out there that aren't totally repulsed by my thread. ^_^

>71 Cynara: You people are disgusting. I feel right at home.

Ditto.

Nice, um, dagger there Stephen. The pink and green colour combo makes it especially masculine, methinks.

A dagger? Is THAT was it is .... Do you know, I thought it was an oyster shucker, Stefano.

Ilana: I know, right? The green and pink screams "whilst working bare-chested in the sun with a magnificent man-beard and stud-muscles I pricked my thumb on a rusty nail and refused medical attention because I'm so darn tough and now have an infection releasing bacterial assault troopers in the form of delicious green pus from my bright pink and inflamed appendage." Definitely masculine, indeed!

Caro: *Sniff* I work with what I have! *Runs away crying*

The green and pink screams "whilst working bare-chested in the sun with a magnificent man-beard and stud-muscles I pricked my thumb on a rusty nail and refused medical attention because I'm so darn tough and now have an infection releasing bacterial assault troopers in the form of delicious green pus from my bright pink and inflamed appendage."

Lol. Gee, you must have read my mind there Stephen. Especially the part about the man-beard and the stud-muscles and the rusty nail. Telepathy. Neat thing that.

Whoa! Someone said man-beard and stud-muscles! Pictorial evidence, and fast!!

Ilana: Telepathy is my middle name (bet you didn't think I was going to say that...)

Richard: Sure...

ROFL

You, young whippersnapper, are in for such a spanking! Shame on you, making fun that way!

LOL

LMAO

Hey, c'mon! You have the man-beard down, and I'm no good at judging what about dude-muscles makes them studly so...there you are! :P

Ape man! Starred and I promise to stop by more in 2011 :)

Hi Jess, I'm happy to have you here whenever you can find time to visit. :)

This threads going at a nice pace for me at the minute if it stays like this we’ll be fine *snorts* yeah like that’s going to happen ;)

I haven't posted a link to it in my 2010 thread yet, so that might have helped. It might also have to do with all the talk about my man-dagger. Yep, that tends to scare people away, I think...

scare people away, you???? ROFLMAO!
consider yourself starred :-)

Maybe it's his man-dagger that scares people away?

Hi Frank/Anita (How am I supposed to know which one!?) Happy you have found the place! :)

Hello Cynara. Yep, definitely. Every time I flash my man-dagger in public all the women run away screaming. I don't get it. Hmmm, maybe they think I'm a mugger or something...

> 91: Stephen
I do sign sometimes with my name, Anita, as I am the computer-junk, cleaning woman and caretaker of dogs, books and garden; Frank is the cook, gets the groceries and works a bit. Both bookaholics ;-)

>88 Ape: *THAT* little thing?!? THAT couldn't scare a nun!(I refer to the GIF, people, drag your minds up from the sewer.)

Anita: Thanks for clarifying! :)

Richard: Yes, the GIF, that's what I've been talking about all this time. What, people didn't think I was talking about something else did they? *Tries to looks ignorant and innocent while covering his malicious grin*

Ape, you young rip, it isn't even 2011 yet and you have 94 posts! In case this thread goes to 250 in the next 5 minutes, I'm going to wish you a Happy New Year now. You are unkeepupable.

Hi Tiffin! Hm, 94 posts in two weeks is pretty good for me actually. Clearly nobody loves me this year. *Sniff pout* Actually, it's nice to know I'm just unkeepupable and not scaring people away with pictures like this:



Ahem, right, happy New Year to you too! :)

Stephen- You are very well-loved, young man! Ask Sir Richard! Just stopping by to say hi. I picked up Pride of Baghdad on your recommendation. Speaking of graphics, I've been enjoying Grandville, about an English detective who happens to be a badger. Beautiful illustrations.

Hey Mark! Grandville looks interesting but, of course, my library doesn't carry it. I'm really scraping the bottom of the barrel when it comes to the stock of graphic novels...it seems mostly all they have left that I haven't read is that Manga stuff and lots of superhero comics I'm not really interested in. :(

Happy New Year, dear Stephen! And, in the spirit of the celebratory season, ...

*CLAP ON*

Ack! Oh dear...doesn't alcohol impede such things? I'll have to drink copious amounts in hopes of foiling The Clappers. *Eyes Ellie wearily*

...or will that just make me more vulnerable? *Sigh* I just can't win around here! :P

Aw, who am I kidding, I'll be in bed by 10. I hope you have a nice New Year though, Laura. :)

#100: I am glad to know that you will be tucked up safe and sound by 10PM, Stephen. I have to deal with far too many of the people who do not realize how much that last drink is really going to cost them.

Indeed, Stasia. Although with how poorly I assume I would probably hold my alcohol, it's not so much the last drink that would cost me but the first. And what it would cost would probably whatever I ate last. D'oh!

I do not hold alcohol well either. Coming from the family I am in, it is probably just as well. I had a grandfather who was an alcoholic.

What kills me are the stories I hear up at my office: "I knew I shouldn't have done it. . ." but they drank and drove anyway. Proof positive to me (if I needed further evidence) that mankind on the whole is full of idiots :)

*bursts in late as usual*
How the hell did I miss this thread?
Just rofled my way through 100+ posts, back on fine, innuendous form Stephen :P
Cannot *wait* for 2011 ;)

Stasia: So you are saying I have some sense after all? Hmmm...

Hey Rach! Happy to have you here, and rofling is always recommended. At least, rolling on the floor is probably more sanitary than sitting on any of the funiture, so have at it! :)

Happy New Year, Stephen! May 2011 be filled with socializing, relationships, and lots and lots of sex.

(Think of it as new year's resolutions!)

Happy New year Stephen !

ROFL, Tom, how come I can't just have sex without all the socializing and relationships? :P

Actually, hopefully with a new car coming my way I might be lucky enough to get some socializing done, but relationships and sex just scare me. What a horrifying resolution!

Happy New Year Cindy!

NEW THREAD!

Now that the REAL new year is here, it is time for a REAL new year thread. Please come and join me in my NEW THREAD. See you all there.

Well then, here you are!

Happy New Year!

Actually wrong Kath, I'm here now longer! Now I'm there. Happy new year to you too though! :D

*cough* You mean here *cough*

Oh, errr, yes, what Caty said! D'oh.

Thanks for pointing that out. :)

Happy New Year Stephen! May all your reading wishes come true!